Sorry to burst your bubble but that's illegal. According to most historians and Constitutional scholars the presidency begins at noon on Inauguration Day no matter what day of the week it is or whether or not the President-elect has taken the oath of office. Zachary Taylor may have been sworn in on March 5th but he was Constitutionally still the President of the United States on March 4, 1849, not President pro tempore David Rice Atchison no matter how much he claimed to be "Acting President for a day".
Alternate Wikipedia Infoboxes VI (Do Not Post Current Politics or Political Figures Here)
- Status
I'm fully aware of these things. That doesn't actually stop the fact that traditionally Sunday inaugurations haven't happened, and before the nuclear era, one day usually doesn't actually matter, no matter how much someone might want to split hairs. 'Illegal' is definitely not the right word to use for something that no one actually decided on for sure until long after it no longer mattered.
“Honorable Cultivator was roundly applauded as a leader of the Starwalker mission when their appointment was first announced. Cultivator had been hatched in 2032, well after the first portion of the project had been launched. Their interest in space travel preceded news of Earth’s habitation. Cultivator served as a civilian commander in a formally military orbital station during the transfer to Hegemonic rule as part of the Gull Accords. Their work there was impressive enough that several Northwestern nations would request Cultivator’s presence at further peace conferences. This combination of administrative, space and diplomatic experience made them a natural choice to lead…”
- Contact: As They Knew It, 2105
“Honorable Cultivator: The most important being in the known universe”
- Des Moines Register, July 8, 2067
“Fuck, that mission started 22 years ago and has over 22 to go. I would go insane.”
- Ong Keon Zhen, Head of the Southern Alliance’s First Contact Mission, July 8, 2068
“Who goes first?”
- Folha de S.Paulo, July 9, 2068
“Why a face-to-face meeting is unlikely at this early stage”
- Science, July 9, 2068
“It appears that we both use the same wavelength of light to see, therefore a visual conference via screens may be an appropriate way to hold our first meeting. All will be admitted at once. Please respond with comments.”
- Transmission from the Greatwhale, July 9, 2068
“Did this motherfucker just avert an interstellar incident with a Zoom waiting room?”
“Clearly a career spent in middle management.”
- Internet commentators ZuzuTop and HippityPoppity, July 9, 2068
“BREAKING: ORDER IN SPACE TO DETERMINE INITIAL SPEAKING ORDER”
- POLITICO, July 10, 2068
“Yeah, we let the Russians go first because everyone knew they were a fading power. And we all sort of coordinated our greetings behind mission control’s backs so we didn’t come across as too petty in our opening statements.”
- Recollections of Anonymous, 2096
“Meeting set for 10:00 EST”
- Washington Post, July 10, 2068
“Greetings all. It is our pleasure to speak before you, not merely as a representative of our homelands, but as a representative of our planet as a whole. For the first time in our history, we speak to a species of equal minds. For the first time, we reach across the ink-dark sky and meet another. It is our hope that our relationships will forever be peaceful and fruitful. An unprecedented exchange of knowledge and ideas stands before us. We ask you to join us in this great exchange.”
- Honorable Cultivator, July 10, 2068
“Greetings from all of humanity, and in particular the Russian Nation, to all the Nations of Ross.”
- Untilov Ruslan, July 10, 2068
“Hello, Greatwhale, this is Caduceus Station. It’s an honor to meet you, on behalf of everyone, everywhere.”
- Tyrone Banks, July 10, 2068
“The People’s Republic of China and the Premier welcome you to our solar system, and all of Earth congratulates you on your successful journey.”
- Du Jia, July 10, 2068
“The people of the world meet you all with open souls, may peace and fraternity be our eternal destiny.”
- Ong Keon Zhen, July 10, 2068
"We do wish to visit all of your fine stations in turn, but we think it will be best if you visit us together,"
- Honorable Cultivator, July 10, 2068
"Sooner or Later, Honorable Cultivator is going to have to make a choice."
- TIME, July 11, 2068
"Rossite contact chamber nicknamed "The Grand Ballroom"
- Des Moines Register, July 12, 2068
"Really, it was a rather neat setup. The Greatwhale only had a fraction of Ross' gravity, but that was less of an issue for us since Earth is less massive. There was a clear divider to keep the atmosphere safe. But there were also airlocks where both sides could put on suits and…what am I describing it for? You've all seen the photos."
- Recollections of American Astronaut, Mark Grissom 2096
"Commander Banks, I guess?"
- Honorable Cultivator, July 13, 2068
"Note for Translator: 'presume' and 'guess' hold different connotations in the English language."
- Honorable Cultivator, July 13, 2068
"There was a certain, liberating nature, to be in a room where half the people were unfamiliar with the concept of racial prejudice. Who saw me simply as a leader of an unknown group. For whom being a black man was as strange as being white."
- Recollections of Tyrone Banks, 2096
"There was a certain, peace, perhaps is the best word, in meeting humans. Who were free from the burdens of our past. When they heard I was a Peninsular, they merely nodded. They did not even know to ask if we had radiation poisoning or to assume we were refugees or the child of refugees. They did not think us brutes solely for the wars of our homeland. That was nice."
- Recollections of Victorious Harvester, 2096
"There is a joke amongst us Islanders, that every time you meet a mainlander, you have to break out a chart and explain to them that no, we don't do life sacrifice. And it was slightly disconcerting when humans started asking the same thing. Never that rudely, no, they were simply curious about the customs of our home. But still, I was the first Islander across the stars, on the fastest ship ever designed. And yet I could not outrun the assumptions."
- Recollections of Fish VII Cosmonaut, 2096
"There is a misconception, I think, both inside and outside, the Queer community, that Rossites are inherently better on the issues than humans. And there is some merit to that. They don't really have sexual orientation or gender as we know it. But that also means they have no sense of the norms while being eager to learn about gender and sexuality. Constant questions about what gender I was assigned at birth, and questions about medical transition. I emphasize there was no malice whatsoever, but it was slightly disconcerting to see so much unintentional recreation of problems on Earth."
- Recollections of Ryder Clyde, 2096
"First Contact: High on Pleasantries, Low on Substance"
- Chicago Tribune, July 14, 2068
“What did they expect? A movie plot? Sinister agents kidnapping or killing to start a war? Everyone starting out hostile but bonding and becoming friends?”
- NASA Director, July 14, 2068
“Honorable Cultivator expresses wish to visit Earth ‘forthwith’”
- Des Moines Register, July 15, 2068
“Individual meetings at human stations are decided by lot.”
- Des Moines Register, July 15, 2068
“How a Dicethrowing Grandmaster is headed to the stars,”
- KtKkCcTt Daily, 2046
“I will donate the dice used to the Clattertoss Hall of Fame upon my return.
I realize some will criticize me for not donating to the Space Hall. But my allyu has long prided itself on our Clattertoss ability, and the dice were our property, to begin with.”
- Message from Glorious Carpenter to Ross, July 15, 2068
“GUESS WHO’S COMING TO DINNER”
- Yonkers Daily News, July 16, 2068
“I am, as most are aware, an avid collector of intoxicating beverages. I was unexpectedly forced to subdivide upon first contact. Because while carbonation in beverages is what brings intoxication to Rossites it is the presence of…what do humans call hydroxyethane again?”
- Recollections of Honorable Cultivator, 2096
“No, I did not get them drunk on Coke. No one was an idiot enough to just swap drinks with them. Besides, NASA had an exclusive contract with Pepsi at the time.”
- Recollections of Tyrone Banks, 2096
“Ah, so China borders the world’s tallest mountains? The Southern Hegemony does as well! See we have much in common!
Wait, humans LIVE there?”
- Meeting between Honorable Cultivator and Chinese Representatives, July 17, 2068
“The Russian literary tradition has found deep resonance on Ross 128b, perhaps more so than any other nation’s. The reason for this is still disputed, and to be sure many human authors have found their niche. However, none save Tolstoy and Dostoevsky have yet been inducted into the Hall of Art for their writing.
This cultural exchange seems to date from the very first meeting between Rossites and Russians aboard the Nicholas.
This contact went both ways, of course, and arguably Russian writers were the first to truly incorporate Rossite themes and ideas into their works.”
- Contact: As They Knew It, 2105
“Comparing and Contrasting: The Southern Alliance and The Southern Hegemony”
- Kompas, July 19, 2068
“WHEN WILL THE ROSSITES VISIT EARTH?”
- POLITICO, July 19, 2068
“Rossite In-System Propulsion is not significantly faster than human systems.”
- Science, July 21, 2068
“Greatwhale interstellar drive not suited for In-System Propulsion, smaller engines will need to be used”
- Science, July 21, 2068
“Rossites hope to depart Mercury Orbit by the end of the month”
- Washington Post, July 22, 2068
“If you raise no objections, We think we shall postpone a landing on Mercury to a later date. Earth, we think, deserves the title of the first planet to host a visitor from beyond your solar system, you after all are why we are here.”
- Honorable Cultivator, July 22, 2068
“Honorable Cultivator suggests Rossite base on Earth may be needed
Emphasizes base would be temporary with no claims to special privilege”
- Des Moines Register, July 23, 2068
“Just how much can we trust the Rossites?”
- Chicago Tribune, July 23, 2068
“72 Countries Express Interest in Rossite base”
- La Monde, July 24, 2068
“It was somewhat curious to me, all the accolades and awards that eventually poured down upon me. I was the Commander, yes. But we were not on a military mission. I was bound to listen to my crew in general, and several leading diplomats and ship officers in particular. With an 11-year, by your time, gap in communication it would have been absurd not to check my power even by human standards. I mean no offense by that, but Rossites have generally been more collectively led in general.”
- Recollections of Honorable Cultivator, 2096
“TIME BEING OF THE YEAR: HONORABLE CULTIVATOR
To reveal a trade secret, the 2068 ‘time person of the year’ (although we can no longer just say person) slot has been filled since we first learned that was when the Rossites would arrive. Perhaps the Editors could have collectively named the Rossites, but the Commander of the mission was always going to be the front-runner.
They are humble about what they have accomplished. They point to the efforts of all aboard the Greatwhale and many more light years away on Ross. They point to the fine efforts of the Human commanders and leaders. They say that as both sides came with truly peaceful, a wit might say Honorable, intent that meeting the moment was hardly a matter of difficulty.
They may be right on some of these points. But they diminish their own accomplishments in doing so. They are, for all intents and purposes, the ruler of every Rossite within the Solar System. One with limited power, but the ruler nonetheless. All the Rossites are under their command, even those from nations that have rejected the Southern Hegemony. And they have had to deal with at first four, but then many more, human nations clamoring for attention. To say nothing of the private actors and threats towards them, as well as the culture shock impacting their crew and those they visit. Had anything gone wrong, Honorable Cultivator would not have been able to escape at least some responsibility.
And yet. The nightmares of first contact seen over both history and fiction, have not come to pass. The internal bickering of Humans and Rossites has not overshadowed or diminished the enormity of this moment. First Contact is, for now, going right.
And try as they might, Honorable Cultivator cannot escape responsibility for that either.”
- TIME Magazine, December 13, 2068
"WHERE OH WHERE WILL THE ROSSITES LAND?"
- Yonkers Daily News, August 2, 2068
"Could a Rossite Landing Be What the Big Apple Needs to Have a Comeback?"
- The New York Times, August 3, 2068
"Even if the United Nations is technically International Ground, it is still too American."
- People's Daily, August 5, 2068
"Antarctica: Neutral Ground?"
- Chicago Tribune, August 7, 2068
"We would prefer something a tad warmer. We don't live that close to our poles,"
- Honorable Cultivator, August 9, 2068
"Geneva Palace of Nations ready to host"
- La Monde, August 10, 2068
"Why Swiss Membership in the ESA likely sinks playing host"
- Des Moines Register, August 12, 2068
"Over a century of neutrality and being useless and then they suddenly aren't neutral when we need a neutral host. Typical."
- Internet Commentator pagedapage, August 12, 2068
"Where to Land First and Where to Stay?"
- Science, August 13, 2068
"Why have the Olympics been scheduled for later this year? Spoiler: It's Monsoons."
- Vice, August 14, 2068
"A landing in Istanbul in the works? That's nobody's business but the Turks."
- Vice, August 15, 2068
"It's a big city with the infrastructure needed to bring in the bulky equipment needed to make suitable accommodations for the Rossites, as well as host every Human who is coming. There is some experience with security there. They obviously have close ties with the US and Europe but have been willing to do business with Russia and China. And I think they are removed enough from us to be sellable to the Southerners."
- Secretary of State to POTUS, August 16, 2068
"The history and locale of Istanbul seem to make it a good location for our first landing. We can land nearby and enter swiftly. However we would like to continue to search for a larger, but still temporary, base elsewhere."
- Honorable Cultivator, August 19, 2068
"IS HONORABLE CULTIVATOR CONSTANTINE XI RETURNED IN ORDER TO RECLAIM CONSTANTINOPLE?"
- Chrysi Avgi, August 20, 2068
"They are looking for someplace that's, by our standards, tropical. Probably near the coast. They are fine with observations but would rather it not be too easily accessed by members of the public."
- Secretary of State for Foreign Affairs in meeting with HRH and the PM. August 22, 2068
"China and the Southerners, man they need a better name, were willing to play ball in Istanbul. But they will want repayment on this front."
- Secretary of State to POTUS, August 22, 2068
"Is time running out to select a base?"
- Chicago Tribune, August 23, 2068
"We anticipated several months of orbit before a structured base was established,"
- Honorable Cultivator, August 24, 2068
"PM: I'm sorry I really don't have…
PM: Your highness hello. I don't believe we've spoken since I congratulated you on your coronation.
PM: No, I'm afraid…
PM: Hello I was unaware this was a conference call.
PM: Well yes I am aware of who you are, you are the President of the United States.
PM: The Premier is coming online in how long?
PM: Greetings ah Comrade.
PM: You no longer use that, I know. It was a failed attempt to lighten the mood. I was simply not expecting. Oh look another call, I guess it is the Kremlin ha ha ha.
PM: Oh it is the Kremlin then? Hello! It is an honor to hear-
PM: -uly hope-
PM: -ar me now?-
PM: -y apologies this system is not-
PM: Thank you for your patience, my staff has managed to put it together. Now what may I do for you fou…eight?
PM: Misters and Madams Presidents and Prime Ministers, it is an honor to hear from you.
PM: May I ask what has prompted this conference? I doubt my recent trade proposals would attract this much attention.
PM: You want my nation to…
PM: OH. Oh.
PM: It would certainly be an honor, but the cost of…
PM: I see. And you say all of the loans? And further investment? Still, security…
PM: That is an awfully large presence in this country. I will need to consult with the Cabinet and Parliament.
PM: No, this is a matter of grave import. It could have, no will have major effects on this nation. I must have the assent of…
PM: I am aware of the economic…
PM: Well perhaps you should have asked us before all the powers agreed that we were the perfect host.
PM: I am aware of your sovereign relationship with me, your highness. I am also aware that we maintain the monarchy largely because you never use your authority.
PM: I am quite firm on this front. I do not think the Rossites will want to land in a place that was forced into hosting no? If they are the type of peo-aliens to do so, we all have bigger problems.
PM: You misunderstand me. I would be thrilled to host. And I will place my support for this measure. And I think my cabinet and Parliament will be happy to do so as well. But there must be democratic accountability of some sort.
PM: Thank you for your understanding. I will make the necessary calls quickly."
- Declassified 2222
"How Turkey is preparing for Rossites"
- Washington Post, August 25, 2068
"What do Rossite Spacesuits look like?"
- Science, August 27, 2068
"Prolonged Base Site has been selected, NASA sources say"
- Des Moines Register, August 30, 2068
"Olympics Overshadowed by Rossite Contact"
- Times of India, September 1, 2068
"It really is amazing. Way back in the 2030s, clearing out space junk to let the probe in was a massive undertaking, now it's a matter of routine."
- Pegasus Veteran, September 2, 2068
"Unexpected Chinese military movement at sea"
- Denver Post, September 4, 2068
"Russian submarine sighting could raise tensions with Indonesia"
- Washington Post, September 5, 2068
"Australia deploys forces to Torres Strait"
- Times of India, September 6, 2060
"Rossites Arrive"
- Des Moines Register, September 6, 2068
"R: Mr. President, do you have anything to say about rising tensions in the region?
PRI: …what region?
R: This region.
PRI: What tensions then?
R: Russian and Chinese ships have been sighted near our coasts, and the Australians have mobilized some forces in our direction. What will put response be?
PRI: Oh that. No comment."
- Indonesian Press Conference, September 9, 2068
"Rossite Landers: A Guide"
- Science, September 10, 2068
"Tomorrow, we shall undertake a historic step for Rossite kind. A landing on a planet beyond our own solar system. And a historic step for humankind as well, to welcome another species to your planet. Tomorrow a new age begins, and we could not be any happier to share it with you,"
- Honorable Cultivator, September 11, 2068
"Several Landings to Follow Istanbul
The Greatwhale confirmed plans to visit Washington, Beijing, Moscow, Brussels, and Brasilia, as well as the soon-to-be-announced Rossite base camp."
- Des Moines Register, September 11. 2068
"Rossite Lander dubbed: 'Peace'"
- New York Times, September 11, 2068
"A lander bearing 5 Rossites, including Honorable Cultivator, has departed the Greatwhale and will be landing in a cleared area of Emirgan Park"
- CNN.com, September 12, 2068
"ROSSITES COME IN PEACE"
- POLITICO, September 12, 2068
"You can tell American power has declined because this hasn't been timed to suit us"
- Internet Commentator, BendItLikeBrandon, September 12, 2068
"Rossite Ship lands safely, world leaders gather around it,"
- CNN.com, September 12, 2068
"We have arrived, bearing with us the hopes and dreams of an entire planet. They are hopes and dreams of friendship."
- Honorable Cultivator, taking their first steps on Earth, September 12, 2068
"Honorable Cultivator always had a polished touch. Always on top of their translator computers and experts. Always briefed on everything. Exactly the one you want leading. A few subordinates were natural peacemakers as well. But others, well, they were never rude. But they were perhaps less prepared for the niceties of diplomacy…"
Reminisces of a Canadian Diplomat, 2096
"Is very beautiful that building."
"That's the Hagia Sophia."
"Oh yes, Were told of it in we briefing. It is a religious building, correct?"
"Err, yes."
"What do you call them?"
"Well…you see…"
"Oh, Remember I, Synagogue"
- Conversation between Diplomats and Rossite, September 13, 2068
"Photos: World Leaders Meet Rossites"
- CNN.com, September 13, 2068
"In a surprising move, Rossites agree to Kathmandu Protocol"
-Des Moines Register, September 14, 2068
"These principles reflect well upon all signatories. We of Ross know how much harm kinetic bombardment may bring, and commend you for stopping it before it begins"
- Honorable Cultivator, September 14, 2068
"86% Consider Istanbul Conference a Success"
- Chicago Tribune, September 15, 2068
"Follow up missions to New Delhi, Brussels, Moscow, Beijing, Brisbane and Washington to come"
- Des Moines Register, September 16, 2068
"Brisbane? Really?"
- Brisbane Times, September 16, 2068
"Late Olympics Open"
- The Times of India, September 17, 2068
"How India wants to sell itself to the Rossites via the Olympics"
- Le Monde, September 17, 2068
"What are these 'Olympics' again?"
"And what are 'sports' again?"
- Traditional Eelkeeper, Rossite Dispatched to New Delhi, September 18, 2068
"How the Indian Olympics play fell flat"
- Des Moines Register, September 19, 2068
"Sports, are dance routines with the ball correct? No?"
- Traditional Eelkeeper, September 20, 2068
"ROSSITE REPS LAND"
- POLITICO, September 21, 2068
"This is the most amazing thing I have ever seen in my life."
- Traditional Eelkeeper after witnessing a Field Hockey Match for the First Time, September 22, 2068
"Rossites meet with Prime Minister, Foreign Dignitaries"
- Brisbane Times, September 22, 2068
"Why would you have war when you have this?"
- Attributed to Various Rossites visiting New Delhi
"I am proud of my Olympic Achievement. But I am well aware that Badminton is not the most popular of the sports on display. So it was mightily heartening to hear that aliens from another world were desperate to see me play for the Bronze Medal."
- Recollections of an Olympic Athlete, 2096
"You mean to tell us that this 'Association Football' tournament is not even the highest quality?"
- Rossite Diplomat, September 23, 2068
"PAPUA NEW GUINEA TO HOST ROSSITE BASE"
- POLITICO, September 24, 2068
"Now, We understand that this 'Grand Final' is to be held tomorrow in the city of Melbourne. We realize this is short notice and do not wish to abuse our status as guests in your country.
But…"
- Bold Carbinator, Rossite Diplomat in Brisbane, September 24, 2068
"Why Papua New Guinea? An Explainer"
- Vice, September 25, 2068
“In order to pass the time during the long, long journey, Greatwhale crew members were afforded the right to form Affinity Guilds, essentially clubs, to provide entertainment and activity unrelated to the work aboard the ship.
When the Rossites arrived in the summer of 2068 the largest Affinity Guild was the Collective for Painting. But by the end of the year, it had been surpassed by the Sports Guild…”
- Contact: As They Knew It, 2101
“It is not that we don’t have anything like Sports. Competitive dance and music on Ross resemble Sports more than you would expect. And card and dice games were major popular events. But the sort of athletics seen on Earth. Astounding. Fascinating.”
- Rossite observing a baseball game, September 26 2068
“Great the sportsball has infected the Rossites. Typical humans, bringing pointless stuff to a world that had been perfectly focused on reasonable things.”
- Internet Commentator ChessGuy20020, September 27, 2068
“Officially no violence has ever occurred between a Rossite and a human, despite threats. However, there are two rumors, rumors of cover-ups of the highest order.
One concerns an altercation between several New Yorkers who thought themselves experts on Rossite culture and some Islanders who were not amused by the accidental insults levied.
The other concerns an incident in Glasgow between supporters of Celtic and Rossites there on a visit. Rangers FC is now well known as being ‘the most popular soccer team outside the solar system.’ It is unknown if this popularity caused the altercation or the altercation caused the popularity…”
- An Unauthorized History of Contact, 2099
“We imagined, sometimes, in our fiction of bringing art or music to aliens who knew nothing of those things. The Rossites do, however. But in sports, we do have a gift, and I think that is beautiful.”
- College Football Coach, September 28, 2068
“Honorable Cultivator in Port Moresby”
- Sacramento Bee, September 29, 2068
“Where will this base be located?”
- The Post-Courier, October 2, 2068
“The Man of the Hour
PNG’s PM faces an Unexpected Challenge, an Unexpected Spotlight, but also an Unexpected Opportunity”
- TIME, October 4, 2068
“Ours is a country that spent years as a colony. We shall not return to subjugation. You would do well to remember that.
Ours is a country that holds some of our world’s oldest cultures. Changes come and changes go, yet we remain. You would do well to remember that.
Ours is a country with the most languages spoken out of any on this planet. One more should not be any trouble. So please remember that most of all.”
- Prime Minister of Papua New Guinea, October 5, 2068
“Rossite Base to Be Built near the city of Lae
The second Largest City in Papua New Guinea was the site of a major battle during WWII”
- CNN.com, October 6, 2068
"Thousands of Soldiers Killed in New Guinea Campaign Mistakenly Think They Are Being Remembered"
- The Onion, October 7, 2068
“Papua New Guinea’s bill largely footed by global powers”
- Des Moines Register, October 12, 2068
“Rossite Money: Interesting, but worthless on Earth”
- The Economist, October 13, 2068
“About the only valuable thing they have is their tech…”
- Russian Oligarch, October 15, 2068
“Rossites talk with local leaders in Lae”
- The Post-Courier, October 17, 2068
“How security is being provided to the Rossites at Lae”
- Denver Post, October 18, 2068
“Construction Commences at Rossite base, expected to take about a month”
-Science, October 19, 2068
“Obviously the situation here is far different than was anticipated initially, but a seven of your years' exploration of the system was anticipated before a return”
- Honorable Cultivator, October 21, 2068
“How Long Do Rossites Live?”
- Science, October 22, 2068
“Rossites live longer, die faster
The average Rossite lives around 120 years, and aging largely stops after maturity. However, once aging begins again, death soon follows. There are no ‘twilight’ years for Rossites.”
- Des Moines Register, October 23, 2068
“A tour of the under-construction base”
- La Monde, October 27, 2068
“First Rossite speech at the UN”
- Wall Street Journal, October 31, 2068
“HALLOWEEN ‘SIMPLY DELIGHTFUL’ SAYS ROSSITE”
- Yonkers Daily News, November 1, 2068
“Main habitation zone completed at the base, work on Spaceport, greenhouse, continues”
- The Post-Courier, November 3, 2068
“Missionaries arrive at Lae”
- Chicago Tribune, November 5, 2068
“Oh, these guys. They’ve been around for a while. I’m sick of them, and I’m a Seventh-day Adventist”
- Mayor of Lae, November 5, 2068
“Base to be completed in time for Rossite holiday”
- Des Moines Register, November 7, 2068
“Rossites at Disneyland Paris ‘would be more fun if we fit on the rides, although we get why we didn’t’”
- La Monde, November 10, 2068
“The formal base opening and naming in a week will be both our first look at a Rossite settlement and a Rossite here holiday”
- CNN.com, November 11, 2068
“World Leaders trickle into the country”
- The Post-Courier, November 13, 2068
“Multiple factions are now courting the government in Port Morseby”
- Denver Post, November 16, 2068
“Rossite Holidays, and Calendar, Explained”
- Slate, November 17, 2068
“We should begin by noting this is not a holiday for all Rossites, although a majority do observe it.
Peace only exists in opposition to war. The start of Peace means a group has just endured bouts of violence. It has lost siblings, parents, and children. It has faced devastation and pain. And that must be remembered. For that, we have the Day of Memory.
But Peace is something that should be celebrated. It is a time of prosperity when individuals and groups can prosper, and live out their full lives. Engage in passions and embrace new ideas. Build instead of destroy, encourage instead of attack. These must be celebrated as well, and so we have a holiday for this as well.
We name this station after this holiday, along with a name important to humanity as well.
Welcome, to Tranquility Station”
- Honorable Cultivator, November 19, 2068
"Why trade with the Rossites is almost certainly never going to happen"
- The Economist, December 2, 2068
"The Essential Readings of Ross"
- Chicago Tribune, December 9, 2068
"Tranquility Station continues to see guests, and send visitors"
- Des Moines Register, December 21, 2068
"A Very Rossite Christmas"
- Denver Post, December 25, 2068
"god bless the poor diplomat who has to explain why 69 is the funny number to the aliens with no concept of sex"
"Oh god there are gonna be actual aliens here for 4/20/69"
"God you guys are old"
Internet Commentators Nightlock12, Maximum Gauntlet, and Torty, January 1, 2069
"Islander Religious Leader meets with Pope and Patriarch"
- La Monde, January 14, 2069
"THE JESUS-DALAI LAMA"
- Yonkers Daily News, January 15, 2069
"Rossite Protocol at Inauguration"
- Washington Post, January 21, 2069
"How the Outer-Solar System Just Opened Up"
- Science, February 4, 2069
"Opinion: Does it take away from human achievements to hitch a ride?"
- Chicago Tribune, February 10, 2069
"How the Rossite equivalent of a garage band is playing the Super Bowl Halftime Show"
- Entertainment Weekly, February 11, 2069
"Area Man Starting to get a handle on ways to racist towards certain Rossites"
- The Onion, February 19, 2069
"Southern Hegemony, Less Southern, Less Hegemonic, than expected"
- The Onion. February 23, 2069
"We came across this article from a publication called 'The Onion'"
"Ah yes, you see, the thing…"
"It is your satire, no? It was very humorous. We would like more if you have any archives."
- February 27, 2069
"
- The Onion, March 1, 2069
"Southern Hegemony: USA or EU?"
- The Atlantic, March 11, 2069
"How Rossites see human politics"
- Des Moines Register, March 16, 2069
"From a Rossite perspective, a socialist co-op and a survivalist commune both bear hallmarks of Volunteerist Singularism, despite being on different ends of the political spectrum. The First Amendment seems to them a Frankenstein-esque mishmash of Individualist and Governmental Singularism, despite being a fairly standard liberal principle. Such confusion will likely reign, on both sides, for a very long time."
- Contact: As They Knew It, 2101
"FIRST NEWS OF EARTH"
- The Greatwhale News, March 29, 2069
"The Fine Art of Translation"
- Des Moines Register, March 30, 2069
"Rossite newspaper/newsite to publish an array of interviews, and perspectives on transmissions coming from Ross. Will also send human works back towards Ross"
- Denver Post, April 2, 2069
"It is to be understood, of course, that all views represented in The Greatwhale News do not represent the views of the mission command, nations of Ross, or Rossites as a whole. And it must refrain from individual or small-collective callouts of non-leadership, as per rule 3 of the regulations. However, beyond that there are not plans for censorship at this time."
- Honorable Cultivator, April 3, 2069
"Rossite Sports Guild working to create first Rossite Sports"
- The Greatwhale News, April 11, 2069
"Some we shall build originally. Some we shall adapt from the humans."
- Sports Guild, April 12, 2069
"Rossites invited to mediate water dispute in Central Asia"
- Chicago Tribune, April 13, 2069
“According to a poll of Rossites, these are their Top 5 Human Aliens
1 - E.T. (E.T.)
2 - Vulcans (Star Trek)
3 - Andalites (Animorphs)
4 - Daleks (Doctor Who)
5 - Xenomorphs (Alien)”
- Entertainment Today, April 14, 2069
“Well, there’s no accounting for bad taste”
- Internet Commentator JediDroid, April 14, 2069
“Can the Rossites Be Taxed?”
- IRS Internal Memo, April 15, 2069
“Why carbonation gets Rossites Drunk”
- Science, April 19, 2069
“Human Day of Narcotics”
- The Greatwhale News, April 20, 2069
“Pepsi, Coke, in the race to make Rossite-safe version of products”
- Atlanta Journal-Constitution, April 23, 2069
“Champagne: The Bridge of Drunkenness”
- La Monde, April 27, 2069
“Rossites to make 3D printer templates for dice available for free”
- Des Moines Register, April 30, 2069
“First Rossite Baseball Game Played At Tranquility Station
Vale Squid defeat Eastern Bottlers 5-3 in game with adapted rules”
- Washington Post, May 2, 2069
“Rossite Ambassador serves as Bridge Partner for Governor”
- Chicago Tribune, May 6, 2069
“Human Governor serves as Throwpull Partner for Ambassador”
- The Greatwhale News, May 6, 2069
“Frantic Rossites trying to cover up evidence of the Burning War”
- The Tuber, May 11, 2069
“Cooking Show to Have Humans as Guest Ingredients”
- The Tuber, May 11, 2069
“Study: Rossites Likely to Reach Super Bowl Before the Lions”
- The Tuber, May 11, 2069
“Rossites realizing they can just copy a human gimmick and humans will love it more than the original”
- The Tuber, May 12, 2069
“EMERGENCY EDITORIAL: KILL THEM, KILL THEM ALL”
- The Onion, May 12, 2060
“Rossite History: The Triumphs and the Tragedies”
- TIME, May 16, 2060
“The Southern Hegemony did not become hegemonic by accident. And even nations that joined honorably have problems in the past as well.”
- Honorable Cultivator, May 18, 2069
“The Removals to the Mountains and Native American Genocide: A Comparative Analysis”
- Journal of Rossite History, May 21, 2069
“The Collapse of the Peninsular Union makes Yugoslavia look peaceful”
- Oslobođenje, May 25, 2069
“Human History: The Tragedies and the Triumphs”
- The Greatwhale News, May 27, 2069
“Rueful Harvester praises Mandela, and the art of a peaceful transition”
- The Greatwhale News, June 3, 2069
“Rossites to speak at Tynwald, Althing”
- The Times, June 10, 2069
“15 years on, Uzbek experiment with Democracy still going strong”
- Tashkent Daily News, June 14, 2069
“OPINION: The Global South Rises Again
Once merely a ramshackle pooling of Space resources, the Southern Alliance now stands as a powerful, prosperous, and democratic counterweight to both autocrats and Euro-American hegemony”
- The Times of India, June 23, 2069
“Rossites visit Moon, get moon dust from Tranquility Base for Tranquillity Station”
- Des Moines Register, June 30, 2069
“What Caduceus Station is doing now that the Rossites are here”
- Science, July 7, 2069
“One Year On: What Has First Contact Wrought?”
- Des Moines Register, July 10, 2069
“For the majority of people on earth, time zone differences meant the first in-person meeting actually did not occur on July 13, but the day after. Really we should wait until tomorrow”
“Since when do you care abou-this is because you’re French! Isn’t it?”
- Overheard, Brussels, July 13, 2069
“FRENCH TERRIFIED OF ROSSITES
Not because they’re cowards but because Guillotines won’t work.”
- The Tuber, July 14, 2069
“Looking towards the future”
- Science, July 16, 2069
“Will any humans be returning with the Greatwhale?"
- Des Moines Register, July 20, 2069
“44 years in transit, plus whatever time you spend there. That’s a hell of a long time to be away. But everyone I know is jumping at the bit.”
- American Astronaut, July 23, 2069
"That's still several years in the future."
- Honorable Cultivator, July 25, 2069
"The Distance between Ross and Earth will, for the foreseeable future, keep both sides at arm's length. This is a blessing and a curse. On one hand, it renders fears of interstellar domination moot. The time it takes is simply too long to effectively manage an empire. On the other hand, collaboration is limited…"
- Science, July 28, 2069
"WHAT THE ROSSITES WILL SHARE…AND WHAT THEY WON'T"
- Yonkers Daily News, July 30, 2069
"The fear isn't really that the drive will be used to visit Ross. But that someone will weaponize it. Like kinetic bombardment but worse.
The force is equal to mass times acceleration right? Basic physics. Now we don't have the exact mass of the asteroid that wiped out the dinosaurs. But it's estimated to have been about 6.2 miles wide, and moving at about 12 miles a second.
The Rossite drive runs at about .5c. That's 93,000 miles per second. And, this is some rough math but the higher level stuff backs it up, so that means, with a Rossite drive strapped to it, something as small as 5 feet could equal the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs. 5 feet. That's smaller than this fancy table you have here.
Yeah, I'm glad they're friendly too."
- White House Security Briefing, August 1, 2069
"Rossites willing to outline theoretical physics behind the drive, with strict openness for all nations with spacefaring ability."
- Science, August 3, 2069
"These formulas only hold true in the vacuum of space. You can also see there is a limit at half the speed of light."
- Rossite Engineer, August 8, 2069
"I am not entirely sure they are correct that you cannot theoretically exceed .5c. Yes, at that level the energy inputs begin to break down, but if you take into account recent breakthroughs by Doctor…"
- Danish Physicist, August 9, 2069
"Bet you we could get one purring that goes .51, maybe .53 if we push it."
- Australian Engineer, August 10, 2069
"The Rossite Endeavor was an international one. Numerous nations came together to create the first ship, that we know of, to cross between the stars. And, to a lesser extent, so has the Human Endeavor.
Obviously, the Southern Alliance is an example. But the European Space Agency has many voices internally as well and is paired with the Americans and other nations as well. China has a sphere that contributes somewhat as well. And even Russia, so isolated, has collaborated with Ethiopia at times.
And at a broader level, all of Humanity has worked together on this. Common life support systems on spacecraft. Sharing information, breakthroughs of the Rossite contact have come from across the world. The Kathmandu Protocol shows unity in the face of the unknown. And the welcomes have been reflected across the world.
We have brought the humans together, although I am not sure they have realized it."
- Honorable Cultivator, transmission back to Ross, August 13, 2069
"Do we need a 'Space UN'?"
- Des Moines Register, August 17, 2069
"Working with individual countries is impossible to avoid, but that does not mean collaboration should be abandoned"
- The Greatwhale News, August 20, 2069
"The various nations involved in Rossite exploration"
- TIME, August 22, 2069
"What We Leave Behind: Rossite Nations opposed to the Greatwhale"
- La Monde, August 25, 2069
"Non-Space Powers Have Much to Contribute"
- Balistrad, August 27, 2069
"Two-Tiered Scheme for Collaboration?"
- Des Moines Register, August 28, 2069
“The facts of the matter are that the Spacefaring Nations will have such an influence anyway that giving them extra formal powers would be redundant in this context,”
- President of Egypt, August 29, 2069
“INTERSTELLAR FORUM MAKES UN LOOK WEAK”
- John Birch Society, August 30, 2069
“Proposed Interstellar Forum merely 'a place to talk’”
- The Times of India, August 30, 2069
“Proposed functions include a more standardized Translation House, a Central Technology hub to ensure no one nation gains an unequal advantage, a cultural exchange program that, at present seems likely to mostly focus on Sports and Rossite Music, and a repository for major documents and agreements of first contact,”
- CNN.com, August 31, 2069
“Port Moresby to host Interstellar Forum, at least for now”
- The Post-Courier, September 1, 2069
"Permanent Bids expected from Geneva, New York, Hong Kong, Istanbul, Cape Town, and Port Moresby"
- Chicago Tribune, September 3, 2069
"Why are Rossite Flags Vertical? And made of wood?"
- Des Moines Register, September 5, 2069
"Initial meeting to occur one year to the day after first landing"
- The Greatwhale News, September 7, 2069
"wow they made a united nations that is eben more useless"
"the un doesn't have a science lab to teach us how to build a interstellar drive"
- Internet Commentators LeSmolPorcupine and TheFalseHater, September 8, 2069
"Exhausted Papua New Guinea: 'We can handle the aliens but did you have to send the Belgians?'"
- The Onion, September 9, 2069
"Why the Rossites can speak (kind of) for their home nations"
- Vice, September 10, 2069
"Rossite Side, Human Side
How two incompatible environments still create one space"
- Science, September 11, 2069
"First Interstellar Forum Meeting Held"
- Des Moines Register, September 12, 2069
"The First Interstellar Forum was not the end of First Contact. Not by a long shot. Ross still hadn't even gotten the first transmissions from the Greatwhale. But it was the end of something. A fitting place to close a chapter, if not the whole story.
It was also a beginning."
- Contact: As They Knew It, 2101
"Space is vast, and we are small. And yet, we have found each other. We have found great differences, differences to celebrate. But we have also found similarities, similarities to celebrate. It is the hope of this Forum that peace can be maintained for all time.
Members of this Forum pledge to prioritize peace over war. Discussion over argument. Bridges over division. Perfect harmony has not yet been obtained, yet it is forever the goal.
Members of this Forum pledge to treat all with respect. Species, nationality, race, gender, orientation, ayllu, and faith, along with many other traits, are no basis for discrimination. Individuals and groups should be judged by the content of their character.
Members of this Forum pledge to support the accurate translation and communication of messages and ideas. Honest and open communication is a path to peace, prosperity, and understanding.
Members of this Forum pledge to support the joint study of the sciences and understanding of technology. Dangerous knowledge should not be spread, and the right of individuals and groups to the fruits of their innovation should not be interrupted. However, the spread of knowledge is of benefit to all.
Members of this Forum pledge to support the exchange of culture. Respect shall be maintained while encouraging understanding. The interplay of ideas and relations with others forms the bedrock of sentient life and should be encouraged.
This Forum forswears all sovereignty over members and condemns domination as a mode of interstellar and international relations.
This Forum is not and shall never be the sole preserve of Humanity and Rossitedom. Should other sentient beings be found, or find this forum, they shall be welcomed fully.
To these ideals, we shall hold, and keep light of life alive."
- Resolution of the First Interstellar Forum. 2069
This represents the finale of the Rossite Cycle. First Contact has come, and with it a new age. Perhaps inspiration will strike, but I’m no longer going to be regularly plugging away at it. This story, like all histories, never really ends. But for now, I’m going to let it stand alone. Hope you enjoyed it.
Loved this. Glad the Rossites appreciate Animorphs lol.
I cannot be sufficiently effusive about this series, I really do think it's wonderful and frankly one of the best little TLs I've ever seen on here. Bravo many times over.
@King of the Uzbeks That was amazing, as have been the previous installments.
I laughed so hard I couldn't breathe when I read the bit about The Tuber.
I laughed so hard I couldn't breathe when I read the bit about The Tuber.
I am simultaneously tickled by the fact that the Rossites find sports- all organized sports- the greatest thing since sliced bread, and horrified by the thought of waiting twenty-two years to find out the results of yesterday's football game.
Bravo!
I mean, they could have tried to corner the drinkable intoxicant/"alcohol" market for the Rossites instead. (similarly producers of such products in their planet could try entering the soft drink market.)
Also, for the symbol of the Interstellar Forum, I imagine those are the constellations Sol and Ross are in on each others sky?
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A little early for Halloween, but eh whatever. For my next animal infobox, here is a member of the goat family that people in New Jersey say resembles the demons of Hell. Introducing the Jersey devil goat.
The Jersey devil goat (Capra jerseyensis), also known as the Devil goat, the Demon goat, the Red Goat, the Leeds devil or simply the Jersey devil, is a type of wild goat that can be found in the Northeastern United States, with the most being concentrated in the state of New Jersey.
The Jersey devil goat in appearance mostly resembles a normal goat but with a few exceptions. These includes its red fur, its long neck (the longest of any species of goat) and its devil-like tail. The appearance of the goat is most likely how it got its name. Religious people also claim that it is an actual type of demon that Satan himself sent up to Earth from Hell.
Unlike other goats which are herbivores, the Jersey devil goat is an omnivore. Its diet consists of grass, fruit, leaves, birds, small mammals, insects, spiders and carrion.
They have been known to attack humans and are considered to be dangerous animals, though attacks are rarely fatal and they have not known to have been man-eaters.
The population of Jersey devil goats is unknown.
Thread VI page 59: Jackalope (Lepus tempermentalus)
Thread VI page 60: Unicorn (Equus monoceros)
Thread VI page 61: Chupacabra (Canis vampyrus)
Thread VI page 66: Hodag (Canis hodag)
Thread VI page 66: Hugag (Alces hugag)
Thread VI page 86: Vampire (Homo vampyrus)
Thread VI page 123: Agropelter (Pongo craniofractens)
Thread VI page 129: Elf (Homo eldar)
Thread VI page 161: Drop bear (Phascolarctos kindynos)
Thread VI page 167: Bunyip (Hippopotamus australis)
Thread VI page 181: Leprechaun (Homo luchorpản)
Thread VI page 205: Nandi bear (Ursus africana)
Thread VI page 219: Sasquatch (Gigantopithecus sasquatch)
Thread VI page 227: Skunk ape (Gigantopithecus sasquatch floridensis)
Thread VI page 229: Yeti (Gigantopithecus himalayans)
Thread VI page 235: Yowie (Gigantopithecus yowie)
Thread VI page 250: Mngwa (Lynx africana)
Thread VI page 263: Ball-tailed cat (Puma caudaglobosa)
Thread VI page 403: The Homo genus
Thread VI page 407: Axehandle hound
Thread VI page 413: Jersey devil goat (Capra jerseyensis) (you are here)
Thread VI page 60: Unicorn (Equus monoceros)
Thread VI page 61: Chupacabra (Canis vampyrus)
Thread VI page 66: Hodag (Canis hodag)
Thread VI page 66: Hugag (Alces hugag)
Thread VI page 86: Vampire (Homo vampyrus)
Thread VI page 123: Agropelter (Pongo craniofractens)
Thread VI page 129: Elf (Homo eldar)
Thread VI page 161: Drop bear (Phascolarctos kindynos)
Thread VI page 167: Bunyip (Hippopotamus australis)
Thread VI page 181: Leprechaun (Homo luchorpản)
Thread VI page 205: Nandi bear (Ursus africana)
Thread VI page 219: Sasquatch (Gigantopithecus sasquatch)
Thread VI page 227: Skunk ape (Gigantopithecus sasquatch floridensis)
Thread VI page 229: Yeti (Gigantopithecus himalayans)
Thread VI page 235: Yowie (Gigantopithecus yowie)
Thread VI page 250: Mngwa (Lynx africana)
Thread VI page 263: Ball-tailed cat (Puma caudaglobosa)
Thread VI page 403: The Homo genus
Thread VI page 407: Axehandle hound
Thread VI page 413: Jersey devil goat (Capra jerseyensis) (you are here)
The Jersey devil goat (Capra jerseyensis), also known as the Devil goat, the Demon goat, the Red Goat, the Leeds devil or simply the Jersey devil, is a type of wild goat that can be found in the Northeastern United States, with the most being concentrated in the state of New Jersey.
The Jersey devil goat in appearance mostly resembles a normal goat but with a few exceptions. These includes its red fur, its long neck (the longest of any species of goat) and its devil-like tail. The appearance of the goat is most likely how it got its name. Religious people also claim that it is an actual type of demon that Satan himself sent up to Earth from Hell.
Unlike other goats which are herbivores, the Jersey devil goat is an omnivore. Its diet consists of grass, fruit, leaves, birds, small mammals, insects, spiders and carrion.
They have been known to attack humans and are considered to be dangerous animals, though attacks are rarely fatal and they have not known to have been man-eaters.
The population of Jersey devil goats is unknown.
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mooooooooooooom Phineas and Ferb the American Occupation authorities imported a broken and archaic form of government to Germany
Let's go, American colony Germany time. Oh, and Phineas and Ferb, too
King Geoge III backs the colonies and things get weird
Now In Thread Form
The Church of America
"I will tolerate the retention of the Church, but toleration is as far as that will extend."
Thomas Jefferson, The 1st Earl of Monticello - 1789
"I will tolerate the retention of the Church, but toleration is as far as that will extend."
Thomas Jefferson, The 1st Earl of Monticello - 1789
The Church was organized after the First British Civil War when it became separate from the Church of England; during the war, the clergy were split between their oath of allegiance to the British Monarch as Supreme Governor of the Church of England and support for Parliament. An estimated tenth of Church of England officials joined the loyalists in their flight to America. However, the actual number may be far higher, with many retiring, before joining the Church of America after migrating to the United Provinces after the Peace of London. These men and existing Church leaders in America worked with King George III to form a new clerical hierarchy in the Provinces. It was made the Established faith at the King's demand during the Constitution's authoring. It was a point of great contention, as many American-born Founders outright opposed the idea of a state religion. As a compromise, the Freedom of Religion Clause was added to the document, meaning that while the Anglican faith would hold a special status, the free practice of religion was to be permitted. The Church describes itself as "Protestant, yet Catholic" and claims apostolic succession, tracing its bishops back to the apostles via holy orders. Before the Great EcclesiasticalTreaty of 1978, the churches of America and England claimed authority over each other as the true successor to the pre-civil war faith. Many, however, rejected this and it remains nicknamed the "True Anglican Church" among much of the American peerage. In 1990, the Church granted independence to the Churches of the Philippines, Liberia, and Patagonia, all of which retained the Monarch as their supreme governor.
The American Monarch (currently Victoria) is the supreme governor, and the archbishop of New Canterbury (currently Micheal Curry) is the most senior cleric. The governing structure of the Church is based on provinces, each presided over by an archbishop, and below that are dioceses, headed by a bishop. And within each diocese are local parishes. The General Synod of the Church of America is the legislative body for the Church and comprises archbishops, bishops, other clergy and laity. The reigning Monarch opens its yearly summits. Its measures must be approved by the Parliament of the United Provinces.
In the modern era, there is growing controversy about the place of the Church in American life. According to polling in 2022, 31% of Americans support disestablishmentarianism, and the issue has re-entered the public debate due to the Labour Party adopting it as an official policy in 2021. In contrast to traditional advocates of disestablishment, Labour supports the Church becoming a National Church in recognition of its crucial role in the nation's history but to remove it entirely from the structure of the state.
If Dunkirk is still British and the United Kingdom drives on the left, I wonder how cars are going to go from Dunkirk to neighboring France (which drives on the right) without traffic issues.
A look into the future of my Decemrist Victory TL: Russian Presidental Election of 2018. Forth Russian Republic had a very turbulent time of ecological probliems, corruption and populism.
Same as in Gibraltar and between Hong-kong and Shenzen, a mess
- Status