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stories:mirror_ah.com_ship

Mirror AH.com Ship

We open in Deep Space, nothing but blackness. Suddenly we see a huge swirling blue vortex and out of it appears a familiar looking vessel. Familiar… and yet…. different. It’s black, for starters. Pitch black. It’s also sleeker… longer… almost militaristic looking. There’s a subtle yet definite aura of menace to the ship. The words AH.COM (written in capital letters and in dark red letters) can be seen as we glide alongside it. We’ve seen this ship before. This is not the AH.com ship we all know and love—this is the MIRROR AH.COM SHIP instead.


The Mirror AH.Com ship and crew have made several appearances in the Series, making their first appearance in the very first episode IN DA GADDA DE VITA THROUGH A CRACKED DARK MIRROR, with the Mirror Doctor What appearing in a cameo role in THE SHIP SANK - DEAL WITH IT! and the entire ship and crew appearing again in GENDERBENDER MIRROR. They later appeared in UNRESOLVED ISSUES and THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN.

Although the ship appears to be very similar to the AH.com Ship, as hinted above there are several differences between the two, with the most notable ones being its black colour and the fact that it appears to be better maintained and more heavily armed than the 'original'.

As is the case with all 'Mirror' parodies and homages, the entire crew all have goatees and/or various scars and tattoos to indicate how 'evil' they are.


Crew members

A partial list of the Mirror crew:

Mirror Doctor What: Ironically, the only male crew member who does NOT have a goatee. Due to the events of GENDERBENDER MIRROR is now (permanently?) stuck in female form. How the Mirror Doctor What feels about this development is unknown although it's safe to assume that s/he finds it strangely arousing…

Mirror Thande: In addition to the goatee, he also has a severe chemical burn on the left side of his face. Only a few clumps of hair remain on his head.

Mirror Torqumada: He has nearly the entire left side of his face replaced by cybernetic parts. In addition, his right arm is also cybernetic in appearance–and where his hand would be, there are an amalgamation of various medical looking instruments, including a rather obscenely large curved scalpel.

Mirror Matt: He too has a goatee. His hair is characteristically long and unkempt. He also has a deep scar that starts from the right side of his mouth that curves up and ends near his ear. When he smiles, it gives his face a sneering expression.

Mirror Leo: Speaks with a British accent and described as sounding 'remarkably like Jeremy Irons'. THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN hints that Mirror Leo is not quite so defensive towards Kit's advances as ours…

Mirror Kit: Yeah–he's got the goatee too. His hair is also closely cropped–almost like a military crewcut. He also wears skintight black leather bondage gear. When he smiles, people tend to notice that all the teeth in his mouth have been sharpened to a fine point. In GENDERBENDER MIRROR, a transmorgified female version of him had sex with 'our' Luakel. Then in THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN it's implied that he did the same to the Mirror Luakel.

Mirror Weapon M: He has–yup–a goatee. He’s also completely bald. There’s a large tattoo of a rattlesnake curled around his right ear and he has a eye patch over his left eye. In THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN, it's revealed that he left the ship and joined a commune after his experience being a woman persuaded him that threesomes were offensive (which horrified the primary Weapon M).

Mirror Landshark: He has a -yes- goatee and a long black leather coat and dark Matrix-like sunglasses. He also has a large Anarchy symbol tattoo on his left cheek.

Mirror IronYuppie: Likes to wear nothing except tight leather clothing. She has obviously dyed black hair in a Mohawk style and her arms and torso are covered in tattoos.

Mirror Diamond: He has long dreadlocks and has multiple ‘pirate-style’ earrings on both ears as well as some kind of Polynesian style ‘swirly’ tattoo over his left eye. (Has apparently left as of THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN, with the departure of primary Diamond, though so far without explanation).

Mirror Luakel: He usually wears a black leather jacket, has multi-colored spiky punk hair and has the remnants of a joint dangling from one corner of his mouth at all times. Was the subject of possibly the most disturbing scene in GENDERBENDER MIRROR, and that's really saying something. Later appeared in male form in UNRESOLVED ISSUES, then by THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN had turned into a raving psychotic that the Mirror Crew use as their 'Secret Weapon' by catapulting him into battle with chainsaws tied to his limbs. It appears this is due to Mirror Kit…experimenting on him.

Mirror Straha: Opposite in nature to 'our' Straha, appears to be a highly muscular latino male with close cropped hair. Usually wears an army uniform and drinks large glasses of milk. Considers alcohol and drugs to be 'poisons' to his body and is obviously disgusted by anybody who consumes drugs or doesn't work out.

Mirror Othniel: Exact opposite of 'our' Othniel in that he wears goth clothes, has dyed black hair and has far too much white make-up on his face. Wears a pentagram symbol necklace and is usually drinking a large glass of scotch and/or smoking dope.

Mirror Flocculencio: Tall heavyset dark-skinned male who wears a turban and carries a large knife at his waist at all times.

Mirror Psychomeltdown: Due to the events of GENDERBENDER MIRROR is now firmly convinced that he is, in fact, Alyson Hannigan herself - to the point that he wears the same style of clothing that she wore in Buffy (white leg tights, tennis shoes, polka-dot skirt, and a pink fuzzy sweater) and wears a red wig. May have voluntarily decided to remain in female form and becomes quite violent if referred to by anything except 'Alyson'. By the time of UNRESOLVED ISSUES, had somehow become a hideous halfway male/female hybrid who was completely insane, and still had the berserk button if addressed as Psychomeltdown rather than Alyson. Usually referred to as 'Psychoalyson'.

Mirror Hendryk: Tall, red-haired male who likes to wear robes with several Asian designs (dragons, Chinese characters, etc) on them. Appears to be the Mirror AH.COM Ship's official 'interrogator'. While transgendered in GENDERBENDER MIRROR, s/he fought the chief Asian Lesbian Ninja in Leather, which the whole primary-AH.com crew found strangely arousing.

Mirror GBW: Seen in CORPS OF EXTRAORDINARY ENGINEERS AND OTHER STORIES, in contrast to the rest of the crew he is exactly the same as his primary counterpart, and in fact they are best friends.

Mirror Dave Howery: Seen in THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN. Pretty much the same as our Dave, but fatter, even more gung-ho, and apparently lacks a Keira to mellow him out.

Other Mirror Crew Members are still to be seen.


stories/mirror_ah.com_ship.txt · Last modified: 2019/03/29 15:14 (external edit)