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Euio Who?

An episode of The Next Generation.

Season: 1

Episode: 5

Written by: ImperialVienna

Air date: May 30, 2009

Trivia: First episode to be written by ImperialVienna.

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Plot summary (in dialogue):

Zyzzyva: Captain there has just been a massive spike on the Graffian partial detector.

Suddenly the bridge is filled with a blinding light. A Figure appears before the crew. The light continues to shine, making the figure hard to see.

euio: I am EUIO, all knowing, all seeing, all powerful member of the Alphabet, bow before me puny mortals.

EUIO snaps his fingers and the bridge begins to shake.

Analytical Engine: We are being forced into a Space-Time Rift, Captain.

EUIO snaps his fingers and WANDERLUST disappears.

Analytical Engine: My sensors indicate we have traveled to TL HW23432, a naturally occurring Habsburg wank.

euio: Indeed, someone or something has been messing with this timeline, you need to find out who and why.

godsown1991: Oh my Holy Japan! It’s a giant flying Bismarck Head.

Nietzsche: The planet has been corrupted by evil. It must be shown the path back to the Hohenzollern’s love.

ImperialVienna: So basically you’re an evil Prussian Space-Jesus, Hell bent on conquest.

Zyzzyva: They appear to have landed in Vienna, a really, really big Vienna.

Big Tex: The usual, we split up into two groups and search the city.

Cloaked Figure #2: No, you shall stop right there, and come with us.

Captor #2: Brains Brains, Hail Prussia.

Hapsburg: Erm… He’s a member of the anti-Prussian Underground. I’m the LEADER.

Sapiento: The Armies of the Prussians are led by the Prussici…

Hapsburg: The Prussici and Junkers are humans. We hope to neutralize them with an ancient weapon left to us by the old ones, that can brainwash anyone to believe anything.

NEKROMANS goes into the alcove where he had been residing and returned with a large cardboard box. On the side, written in Sharpie were the words: “BOX OF BRAINWASHING – USE ON PRUSSIANS”.

Nietzsche: Yes, yes my Zombie warriors, strike down the non-believers.

IMPERIALVIENNA carries the box over to NIETZSCHE and flings open the flaps. A bright light pours out engulfing the Prussici’s head. After a few second he closes the box.

Nietzsche: Yea, some guy came through a door at my local pub and gave me all this neat stuff if I promised to go out and conquer any and all Habsburg wanks with it. It was he who gave me the idea for Zombie Bismarcks.

Big Tex: We’ve done you’re stupid bidding, now could you please send us home?

euio: But of course, and I’ll even return the one you call Wanda too.


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Behind the Scenes

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Easter Eggs

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stories/euio_who.txt · Last modified: 2019/03/29 15:14 by

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