It's A Popularity Contest!
Down in the state of Arkansas in the midst of the cold war, stood a little high school which operated normally to nearly every other high school in the country, with decision being made by a principal which was elected by the members of the Student Grand Assembly with their votes being cast at the begining of each school term. Launched as part of Calvin Coolidge's Interactive Democracy initiative in the 1920s, it would spark long debates about politics around many dinner tables and have homework assignments sloppily copied in exchange for a bribe to a faculty member. The cash for A's scheme was near to a mad dash on your parents' bank accounts for political favors and illegal hit jobs, often with the assistance of the Chicago gang and the Capone led white house for the rich, and the hobo with a shotgun for the more destitute of students.
This blatant corruption within the school system would lead Principal Herbert Hoover to lament that it "Was nothing more than a goddamn popularity contest with the one with the thickest bank account." However, despite cries for reforms of the corrupt system by more progressive principals, such as Thomas Dewey and Theodore Roosevelt and his cousins, congressional legislation would be stalled and killed in committee after committee by politicians who had much to lose with the reforms that the more younger members were proposing. With an explosion in pride, nationalism and anti communist propaganda within the american classroom, a single lone high school in the deep south would usher in large, slow, changes with a singular election.
As Winter Break would wind down and students would begrudgingly drag their feet through the snow to Little Rock Arkansas, a foreign exchange student by the name of Alex Trebek would charm his way through the social elites of the nerds and geeks respectively, hobbling a coalition of seats to win his way to become head of the Homework Party by the snowy fall of 1959.
By that time, a large flu had swept the town of Little Rock, forcing school cancellations and his breif unemployment and furloughs for a short time, blamed on a nasty chicken pox epidemic that would see the Student Grand Assembly brought forcefully into session to think of solutions. Around that time, another crisis struck, which was a strike by the volunteer janitors, demanding actual paychecks, shorter working hours and the right to unionize.
Thinking fast, Principal Bob Dole would deploy the Student Guard out, with a bloody conclusion of ten dead (two guards and eight janitors) drawing public support for left wing and right wing responses to the boost respectively. The names of the eight killed janitors would be named on a plaque in December of 1959. Trebek would lead the loudest shouts for Doles' impeachment as principal, wanting immediate elections to be held. This point was relented by Dole, who officially dissolved the Student Grand Assembly via intercom on December 15th,1959 for immediate elections to be held within one month.
Bill Clinton's Liberty and Burgers party would hastily begin to mobilize it's membership, with a large demand of huge sweeping reforms planned, from shortening the school days and meetings of the 'working lunch' SGA to half an hour less, to the increase in paychecks for those families which were struggling to pay the school taxes in order to allow student representation. However, it would also demand stricter segregation laws and offered up bills that would disenfranchise black students in the school, which made up just 4% (198) of the school's entire population.
He would also have to answer for several 'tutoring' sessions that had gotten the local authorities involved revolving his many abusive relationships towards several female students. When asked about the allegations during the gym debates, he would deny having them with a certain Rosa Parks, a black woman which was the most incendiary of the allegations to surface during the campaign.
JFK Populist Students
By far one of the most outside candidates to the race save for Nixon, most students would wonder what any business the money and looks of a north easterner would be doing in the
deep south of all places. The young and charming adolescent would answer with a swing to the populist and disgruntled voters that had previously ousted the former chairman of Stuart Symington. He would be the very first candidate to use the radio as a means of communication between his allies and listeners, spreading their populist campaign of raising the pay for the members of the assembly and offering to execute the very top principals. In these speeches his main promise would be to abolish the position in favor of a council system of various members from his own political party, and others too.
Ronald Reagan Conservative Patriot
The young and good looking Reagan proved to be nearly a copy paste response of the right's response to the soaring success in JFK. He would promise the students a new era away from the brain dead Veteran Faculty,which he declared was out of touch with the angers of the students, such as long lines at drinking fountains and during lunch, restrictions on travel to and from the various rooms within the school and limited tutor times per student. Reagan would mark a path clearly in the minds of the voters: He was the future, and all other candidates seemed to be offering up a solution of a more nostalgic past, instead of a realistic future.
Hillary Clinton School Pride
One of the more right wing of the left wing members, the soul female party leader of School Pride would want to push for radical changes such as the legalization of gay relationships within the school, with herself coming out as gay only a day before the election, one of the many factors that would lead to their parties loss of 8 seats. Besides the new stance on social issues, her party platform was essentially a cookie cutter copy of the largely unpopular Dole candidacy, using a line of thinking that if the most popular candidate is doing this, I'll have these in my campaign too. While attempting to draw candidates that were both attracted to the Dole campaign and disappointed at the lack of social issues addressed by the Dole campaign.
However, she was clumsy and blunt when Reagan and Trebeck hammered her at being a copy of the unpopular Dole and wanting to "ruin traditional relationship within the school". Along with her forcing of friends that made her personal circle shrink more and more, it was an absolute shock that only 8 seats switched hands from School Prides' grasp. Clinton even had a resignation letter proposed to the School Pride leadership, but never sent it off after seeing things weren't as bad as they were, in her words:
"We're up shit creek, but we can still find the paddle, we just dropped it somewhere in the creek and now have to look through the shit to find it. We'll find it."
Bob Dole Veteran Faculty
While normally having the power and advantage of the incumbent political party in office would work to the benefit, it would be an out of touch misery for Bob Dole's candidacy and the VF party as a whole. Decried as the party of the "man" and declared to be "filled with goddamn commies" There was more of a reaction in comparison to say the man that was actually running as a communist in the election due to Doles' name recognition as the former Vice Principal before abolishing the post in the early 50s.
Along with his blunt and heavy handed strategies in dealing with the working class and ring of spies that had been discovered in the halls of Reagan's campaign, he was unpopular. He alienated both sides of the political spectrum and was left with wooing moderate voters into supporting his candidacy as a last resort, of which he could only grab a handful of delegates and actual voters come election day. Veteran Faculty would see one of it's largest defeats in the history of school politics, with a staggering loss of 90 seats to the other parties. Upon hearing news of the results, Dole would retire to his quarters before celebrating with the other victorious political members in various vandalizing pranks as part of inaugural hijinks.
Gerald Ford Classroom Populist
Stuck in the classroom because of bad behavior, Ford's campaign was nearly sunk with various detentions and nearly an impeachment and expulsion from the SGA, narrowly avoiding punishment after punishment by the aging Andrew Johnson teacher lookalike. His promises on the campaign trail throughout room to room was a message of populist charm and charisma, though with noticeable gaffes along the way, with a notably bad one being the last minute declaration during a final debate that 'pearl harbor was the best thing to happen to the united states' on a purely industrial level. This would poison the well for several candidates who had hoped to drink to Representatively constituent success in the election.
Richard Nixon Communist
Narrowly avoiding both an assassination attempt and undercover threats to dismantle and divide the communist party's three amigos of the revolution, Nixon would take the party to it's largest left wing sentiment, decrying almost everything to the right of Stalinism, becoming a staunchly hardline member of the party. Being on the local Football team enabled him to convince some of his best friends to both spread the news and attend meetings of Marxist-Leninist thought (With the meetings bugged of course).
He would monitor his friends very closely, watching for almost any sign of betrayal to the "school revolution" he was hoping to bring upon Little Rock, then the Arkansas School Districts. His performance in the debates was seen to be one of his defining moments in clashing with the outsider, though being slightly humiliated in the fact that the foreigner was able to go toe to toe with the skilled debater. This effect would not harm the party's chances at losing seats, with the opposite occurring on election day of two more friends to talk to.