Why am I afraid this heir will turn out like Emperor Detritus?
. . . the Artesian Guard consulted the opportunity to impose its candidate in the room of Precocius; the young Detritus, a favorite of the troops, was located cowering under his bed in the palace; hoisting him upon their shoulders, the soldiers acclaimed him as emperor; and the populace was constrained to accept, what it could not alter; the new emperor was of a choleric disposition; he stuttered when he spoke, limped, was blind in one eye, given to convulsions, had six fingers on his left hand, had never mastered feeding himself, and, despite his tender age of seven years when he acceded the throne, was given over to several dozens of the vilest perversions . . .
-- Cvltvre Made Stupid, Tom Weller