I guess I must've lost track of the first 349. Oops.
Don't worry about it. In fact, knowing this TL, there's plenty more where that came from. I think it could be in the ten-thousands, but I could be wrong.
I guess I must've lost track of the first 349. Oops.
"Smokey Joe" Sundblom
Security guard at Notre-Dame Cemetery in Ottawa, Ontario
"Every July 19th, I've had to rinse off John Kricfalusi's headstone because we've had visitors walk up and piss on it. The last two that did so, I later found out, were newlyweds on their honeymoon."
Is this the start of the next major update?"Smokey Joe" Sundblom
Security guard at Notre-Dame Cemetery in Ottawa, Ontario
"Every July 19th, I've had to rinse off John Kricfalusi's headstone because we've had visitors walk up and piss on it. The last two that did so, I later found out, were newlyweds on their honeymoon."
"Every July 19th, I've had to rinse off John Kricfalusi's headstone because we've had visitors walk up and piss on it. The last two that did so, I later found out, were newlyweds on their honeymoon."
I know who it is.The couple will be revealed later.
I know who it is.
Officer David Nakamura; Ottawa Police Service
"...and what did these two individuals look like?"
Smokey Joe
"Uhh...let's see...they were both white. The husband had a T-shirt of some death rock band I never heard of...the wife had raven black hair with a red bandanna...black dress with white polka dots..."
I'll be honest, I kind of had a suspicion it would be them...Officer David Nakamura; Ottawa Police Service
"...and what did these two individuals look like?"
Smokey Joe
"Uhh...let's see...they were both white. The husband had a T-shirt of some death rock band I never heard of...the wife had raven black hair with a red bandanna...black dress with white polka dots..."
Officer David Nakamura; Ottawa Police Service
"...and what did these two individuals look like?"
Smokey Joe
"Uhh...let's see...they were both white. The husband had a T-shirt of some death rock band I never heard of...the wife had raven black hair with a red bandanna...black dress with white polka dots..."
JIMMY KIMMEL
(ABC's Jimmy Kimmel Live; Opening Monologue)
"I'm sure you guys heard the news...Steven Universe creator Rachel Stone and her husband, Disney animator Daniel Abbott, were spotted at the Notre-Dame cemetery in Ottawa over the weekend. Apparently they were on their honeymoon and they swung by the ol' graveyard to give John Kricfalusi's gravestone a nice golden varnish..."
*Audience laughs*
"Police in Ottawa earlier today caved to public pressure and have decided against pressing public urination or vandalism charges against the newlyweds..."
*Audience applauds*
"So tonight, we are pitching a new tourism slogan for the Canadian capital; 'When in Ottawa, piss on John K's grave...eh!'"
*Audience gives standing ovation*
Wasn't it obvious?I'll be honest, I kind of had a suspicion it would be them...
At first it could've been anyone, but once he published the descriptions....yeah it was, but you never know.Wasn't it obvious?
This is why I love monologues more than anything else on late-night television.
JAY LENO
(CBS's The Late Show with Jay Leno; Excerpt)
"Pet owners in Canada now have a new place to housebreak their cat, dog, horse...hell even a domesticated moose if you've got one...
...right on John Kricfalusi's grave in Ottawa!!!"
*audience laughs and applauds uproariously*
DAVID LETTERMAN
(NBC's The Tonight Show with David Letterman; Excerpt)
"Here's a photo from the Ottawa citizen of John Kricfalusi's grave...
Of course, you can see a large, noticeable golden yellow splotch on the headstone...
...and I can assure you that wasn't Molson Canadian poured on it."
*audience laughs*
ARSENIO HALL
(Excerpt from UPN's Up Late with Arsenio Hall)
"Now Seth, I understand you and Rachel Stone are teaming up again for next year's Hey Arnold! project. What is your take on her and her husband pissing on John K's grave?"
SETH MACFARLANE
(promoting Larry and Steve: The Stewie Griffin Story):
"I love hearing stories like that. In fact, I revel in it!"
*audience applauds and barks*