Well, Metternich has now burned two bridges (with Franz and with Henri) trying to slander Frankie (and Henri's going to be getting a letter from Louise soon outlining EXACTLY what happened, in fact, she probably penned it as soon as Frankie left), since Metternich was pretty light on detail.
Frankie Goes to the Hofburg, or Napoléon II, Regent of Austria?
Burning in hell is too good for them. As Edmond Dantes says "they must suffer as I suffered. They must live to see all they treasure, all they hold dear, ripped from them as it was ripped from me."
Not gonna lie but this is from one of my favourite movies of all time, but seeing Frankie stand up at Henri's wedding or 18th birthday and give a speech like this would be absolutely epic IMO
I do so enjoy madame royale cutting Metternich down to size…François has never been anything but a friend to the bourbons, ironically enough.
She probably needs to go gargle with holy water after this
The Three Bullets [1]
[Deleted Scene]
*dawn* *Louis Napoléon Bonaparte is led out with fellow conspirators onto the ramparts of Bayonne* *lined up against the wall* *conspicuously heavy silence* *priest passes along the line* *offers the last rites to each conspirator* *several take the offer* *when the padre gets to Louis Napoléon, he makes the offer* *Louis Napoléon spits in the priest's face* *the priest clearly repeats the offer* *but gets a stony silence* *moves onto the next conspirator* *finally done, the padre goes to stand with the rest of the soldiers now lined up opposite, aiming their rifles at the conspirators*
Conspirator #1: *falls dead* *we saw the shot but didn't hear it*
Conspirator #2: *falls dead*
*camera pans to Louis Napoléon* *his face is impassive* *he looks like he's torn between indifference and being a little boy who wants his mommy*
*suddenly Louis Napoléon seems to steel himself* *starts singing*
Louis Napoléon: Français, pour nous, ah! quel outrage! Quels transports il doit exciter? C'est nous qu'on ose méditer. De rendre à l'antique esclavage![2]
*men of the firing squad seem to hesitate*
Colonel of the firing squad: *shoots Louis Napoléon himself* Quoi! des cohortes étrangères. Feraient la loi dans nos foyers! [3] *then shoots the priest as well for good measure*
*Actual scene*
Soundtrack: Weber, Der Freischütz: Here In This Vale of Sorrows
*in the salon of the Louis Bonaparte's Palazzo Gianfigliati in Florence*
Louis: *reads the death notice of his [favourite] son* *clearly sad*
Frankie: *dandling Louis Napoléon's year-old second son, Henri Richard, on his knee* *while Louis Napoléon's six year old eldest son, Louis Joseph, stands at his mother's knee*
Louis: *accusingly to Frankie* you did this. Like your father! This plot of yours to destr-
Frankie: Uncle, calm yourself. There are children present. What must they think?
Louis: *angrily* calm myself? My second son is dead because of you!
Frankie: and now you wish to play the injured sausage?[4] Surely Charlotte has more right? After all, you were the one who was...pestering me to let him accompany his cousins to Spain to fight. I didn't want to send him. Charlotte didn't want him to go. And now you wish to blame me for this...inconvenience.
Louis: inconvenience? It's an-
Frankie: inconvenience. And a relief. He has caused enough embarrassment for a lifetime. The only good thing was that when they fired he didn't turn into the snivelling coward-
Louis: spoken like a coward who has never seen action
Frankie: *to Charlotte* meine liebchen, I think you must take the children, their grandfather is clearly exhausted. *tone of voice says that this is an order not a suggestion*
Charlotte: *looks as though she's about to object* *then thinks better of it*
Frankie: *not having missed the look* there's a good girl. *hands the year-old Henri Napoléon to his brother*
Charlotte: *along with her daughter, the 9yo Josèphe[5] Julie, leaves the room* *closes the door behind her*
Frankie: now...Uncle...you have anything to say to me, you can say it.
Louis: *rants at Frankie* *about loyalty to his family* *loyalty to to his father's cause*
Frankie: *stubbing out his cigarette* spare me the limpid homilies, Uncle. You have no more loyalty to my father or his cause than Unvle Lucien. The only difference is that Uncle Lucien's sons, as repugnant as he found it, volunteered to go fight. Paul haa made a fine showing of himself. While I'm told thatLouis is nowproficient in Basque and acts as interpreter forD. Carlos himself. Pierre and Antoine...well...hardly inspiring characters but they are good, if not brilliant soldiers. Why even Prince Bachiochi [6] seems to be doing well at Frohsdorf. I'm told Henri has him as a private secretary, even though Fédéric wanted to serve in Spain. Credits all. Except for your Louis...a boy who's father pestered me to allow him to show his loyalty by going to Spain. A boy whose father made a nuisaance of himself when I demurred. A boy I would've far rather kept at my side. Whose father accused me of fearing that he would show me up if I sent him to Spain. At least Uncle Lucien never insisted on his son's serving to cover his own *disgusted tone* treachery and weakness.
Louis: *opens mouth to object*
Frankie: *holds up finger for silence* can you tell me, Uncle, that my refusal was unwarranted? That I did not have the right to refuse? When he did exactly what I was afraid of him doing? He showed me up, alright. Made me look a fool to not only the Bourbons, but also the Habsburgs, the Borbons, the English...I simply did what my father was too merciful to do to Uncle Lucien. I pruned a rather embarrassing branch of the family tree.
Louis: he was loyal to your Majesty. He was-
Frankie: *muses* where have I heard that before? *Beat* the duc d'Enghien. My father had him dragged out and executed at Vincennes. Did any of you Bonapartes protest at what was nothing more than rhe murder of an innocent man? No...you hated your mother-in-law for being the only person to even tey to persuade my father. Now you wish to play the hypocrite and wring your hands when I do the same to a guilty man?
Louis: and you think this will win you the favour of those Bourbons you pal around with? That the Habsburgs will accept you?
Frankie: well, I suspect they'll take it more kindly than you naming your son after Madame Royal's brother[7], and now your grandson after her other brother. After all, I doubt the woman lifted a finger to save your son. *Tone is like "not the way she spoke up for me"* Now, the queen of Holland will be arriving shortly. I pray you'll at least be civil.
Louis: *flustered
*Shriek from Charlotte*
Frankie: "in an exasperated tone* what now?
*Doors open*
Usher: Her Majesty, the Queen of Holland. His Royal and Imperial Highness, the grand duke of Berg!
*Hortense de Beauharnais sails into the room on the arm of her "executed" son* *smirking triumphantly at her husband* *out in the hallway, Charles Napoléon is hovering over a fainted Charlotte*
Frankie: *smiles* I'll say it again, Uncle, Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Even the Devil is afraid of them
[1] referencing Der Freischütz were Kaspar makes a deal with the Devil to get three magic/demonic bullets for Max that will hit their targets. The Devil/Samiel agrees to Kaspar's deal of Max's soul in exchange for a deference of payment of his own soul with the line "fine. Tomorrow at the gates of Hell: him or you."
[2] from the second verse of La Marseillaise. Oh Frenchmen, what outurage for you! Does this not arouse your fury? This is what they plan for you. The return to the old slavery
[3] 3rd verse of La Marseillaise: what! these foreign regiments/cohorts/invaders. Who make the law in our own home!
[4] German idiom for being a prima donna
[5] for her father, not her grandmother-in-law
[6] Elisa's son. OTL died as a teenager after a horse riding accident
[7] this was actually Josephine's doing. And combined with her opposition to Enghien's murder, its why she was usually involved in stories of the escape of Louis XVII
*dawn* *Louis Napoléon Bonaparte is led out with fellow conspirators onto the ramparts of Bayonne* *lined up against the wall* *conspicuously heavy silence* *priest passes along the line* *offers the last rites to each conspirator* *several take the offer* *when the padre gets to Louis Napoléon, he makes the offer* *Louis Napoléon spits in the priest's face* *the priest clearly repeats the offer* *but gets a stony silence* *moves onto the next conspirator* *finally done, the padre goes to stand with the rest of the soldiers now lined up opposite, aiming their rifles at the conspirators*
Conspirator #1: *falls dead* *we saw the shot but didn't hear it*
Conspirator #2: *falls dead*
*camera pans to Louis Napoléon* *his face is impassive* *he looks like he's torn between indifference and being a little boy who wants his mommy*
*suddenly Louis Napoléon seems to steel himself* *starts singing*
Louis Napoléon: Français, pour nous, ah! quel outrage! Quels transports il doit exciter? C'est nous qu'on ose méditer. De rendre à l'antique esclavage![2]
*men of the firing squad seem to hesitate*
Colonel of the firing squad: *shoots Louis Napoléon himself* Quoi! des cohortes étrangères. Feraient la loi dans nos foyers! [3] *then shoots the priest as well for good measure*
*Actual scene*
Soundtrack: Weber, Der Freischütz: Here In This Vale of Sorrows
*in the salon of the Louis Bonaparte's Palazzo Gianfigliati in Florence*
Louis: *reads the death notice of his [favourite] son* *clearly sad*
Frankie: *dandling Louis Napoléon's year-old second son, Henri Richard, on his knee* *while Louis Napoléon's six year old eldest son, Louis Joseph, stands at his mother's knee*
Louis: *accusingly to Frankie* you did this. Like your father! This plot of yours to destr-
Frankie: Uncle, calm yourself. There are children present. What must they think?
Louis: *angrily* calm myself? My second son is dead because of you!
Frankie: and now you wish to play the injured sausage?[4] Surely Charlotte has more right? After all, you were the one who was...pestering me to let him accompany his cousins to Spain to fight. I didn't want to send him. Charlotte didn't want him to go. And now you wish to blame me for this...inconvenience.
Louis: inconvenience? It's an-
Frankie: inconvenience. And a relief. He has caused enough embarrassment for a lifetime. The only good thing was that when they fired he didn't turn into the snivelling coward-
Louis: spoken like a coward who has never seen action
Frankie: *to Charlotte* meine liebchen, I think you must take the children, their grandfather is clearly exhausted. *tone of voice says that this is an order not a suggestion*
Charlotte: *looks as though she's about to object* *then thinks better of it*
Frankie: *not having missed the look* there's a good girl. *hands the year-old Henri Napoléon to his brother*
Charlotte: *along with her daughter, the 9yo Josèphe[5] Julie, leaves the room* *closes the door behind her*
Frankie: now...Uncle...you have anything to say to me, you can say it.
Louis: *rants at Frankie* *about loyalty to his family* *loyalty to to his father's cause*
Frankie: *stubbing out his cigarette* spare me the limpid homilies, Uncle. You have no more loyalty to my father or his cause than Unvle Lucien. The only difference is that Uncle Lucien's sons, as repugnant as he found it, volunteered to go fight. Paul haa made a fine showing of himself. While I'm told thatLouis is nowproficient in Basque and acts as interpreter forD. Carlos himself. Pierre and Antoine...well...hardly inspiring characters but they are good, if not brilliant soldiers. Why even Prince Bachiochi [6] seems to be doing well at Frohsdorf. I'm told Henri has him as a private secretary, even though Fédéric wanted to serve in Spain. Credits all. Except for your Louis...a boy who's father pestered me to allow him to show his loyalty by going to Spain. A boy whose father made a nuisaance of himself when I demurred. A boy I would've far rather kept at my side. Whose father accused me of fearing that he would show me up if I sent him to Spain. At least Uncle Lucien never insisted on his son's serving to cover his own *disgusted tone* treachery and weakness.
Louis: *opens mouth to object*
Frankie: *holds up finger for silence* can you tell me, Uncle, that my refusal was unwarranted? That I did not have the right to refuse? When he did exactly what I was afraid of him doing? He showed me up, alright. Made me look a fool to not only the Bourbons, but also the Habsburgs, the Borbons, the English...I simply did what my father was too merciful to do to Uncle Lucien. I pruned a rather embarrassing branch of the family tree.
Louis: he was loyal to your Majesty. He was-
Frankie: *muses* where have I heard that before? *Beat* the duc d'Enghien. My father had him dragged out and executed at Vincennes. Did any of you Bonapartes protest at what was nothing more than rhe murder of an innocent man? No...you hated your mother-in-law for being the only person to even tey to persuade my father. Now you wish to play the hypocrite and wring your hands when I do the same to a guilty man?
Louis: and you think this will win you the favour of those Bourbons you pal around with? That the Habsburgs will accept you?
Frankie: well, I suspect they'll take it more kindly than you naming your son after Madame Royal's brother[7], and now your grandson after her other brother. After all, I doubt the woman lifted a finger to save your son. *Tone is like "not the way she spoke up for me"* Now, the queen of Holland will be arriving shortly. I pray you'll at least be civil.
Louis: *flustered
*Shriek from Charlotte*
Frankie: "in an exasperated tone* what now?
*Doors open*
Usher: Her Majesty, the Queen of Holland. His Royal and Imperial Highness, the grand duke of Berg!
*Hortense de Beauharnais sails into the room on the arm of her "executed" son* *smirking triumphantly at her husband* *out in the hallway, Charles Napoléon is hovering over a fainted Charlotte*
Frankie: *smiles* I'll say it again, Uncle, Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Even the Devil is afraid of them
[1] referencing Der Freischütz were Kaspar makes a deal with the Devil to get three magic/demonic bullets for Max that will hit their targets. The Devil/Samiel agrees to Kaspar's deal of Max's soul in exchange for a deference of payment of his own soul with the line "fine. Tomorrow at the gates of Hell: him or you."
[2] from the second verse of La Marseillaise. Oh Frenchmen, what outurage for you! Does this not arouse your fury? This is what they plan for you. The return to the old slavery
[3] 3rd verse of La Marseillaise: what! these foreign regiments/cohorts/invaders. Who make the law in our own home!
[4] German idiom for being a prima donna
[5] for her father, not her grandmother-in-law
[6] Elisa's son. OTL died as a teenager after a horse riding accident
[7] this was actually Josephine's doing. And combined with her opposition to Enghien's murder, its why she was usually involved in stories of the escape of Louis XVII
Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?
Soundtrack: Benjamin Carr Federal Overture
*interior* *still the Palazzo Gianfigliati* *although it is a dining room* *and Louis, his sons, daughter-in-law and grandchildren are at the table* *Louis is glaring daggers at Hortense across the table*
Frankie: *breaks off conversation with the comte de Morny* *turns to his cousin* Louis, we are deeply touched by your loyalty to our cause. In fact, we feel that your father could take a few a pointers.
Louis Napoléon: *quietly* yes, your Majesty.
Frankie: in fact...we have two presents we wish to bestow upon you.
Louis Napoléon: your Majesty, we are honoured.
Frankie: the first is concerning your daughter
Josèphe Julie: me?
Frankie: yes, lammchen. *talking to her directly* how would you like to be a duchess?
JJ: is that like a princess?
Frankie: of course. You'd live in a much fancier palazzo than this. In Paris. You'd have pretty clothes and jewellery-
JJ: *nods emphatically*
Louis: she already has a betrothed.
Frankie: *half-amused* *reaches for his wine* to who?
Louis: Jérôme's son, the Prince de Montfort
Frankie: *Maleficent tone* well isn't this awkward. I was trying to arrange a far more...prestigious match for her than some son of a bankrupt philanderer.
Louis: to whom?
Frankie: well, it makes no difference now. If she already has a betrothal. It was just that she would've had ties to the future of England and France. But if you're set on her marrying the king of Württemberg's grandson, I see no reason to upset that apple cart unnecessarily. I suppose I will have to ask one of Lucien's daughters for it then
Louis Napoléon: *stands up* you'd insult us by offering us such a prestigious match and then denying it? So you can give it to that canaille, the prince de Canino? His sons have become nothing but bootlickers for the Carlists.
Frankie: you were the ones who pointed out that she is already betrothed. I was simply honouring an arrangement made with neither my knowledge or consent.
Louis Napoléon: Jérôme shall have to look elsewhere then *to his father* you and I both know that the only reason he has suggested the marriage between his son and JJ or Charles [Napoléon III] and Mathilde, was because he wants to get his greedy little hands on their inheritances.
Louis: *looks like he knew this8 don't talk of money at table Louis, it's vulgar and common.
Frankie: he's right, y'know *looks at Hortense*
Louis Napoléon: which of us?
Frankie: both of you. Nothing so frightfully dull as to sit a dinner table and hear a bunch of men talking of their money and business. And I'm afraid Uncle Jérôme is attempting to get around the fact that I put his inheritance in a trust. *smug* Managed by his wife. So that he can't spend it all in one place.
Hortense: I always thought how your father treated Betsy was wrong, your Majesty.
Frankie: how my father treated many women was a crime, Madame
Hortense: *to her son* this is a good match for Josephine [1]. In fact, one of the best matches she could get at the moment. And certainly oceans away from a mere son of a king with no kingdom.
Louis: *scoffs* yet you would offer her to the duc de Bordeaux
Frankie&Hortense: *look atone another guiltily*
Louis Napoléon: *looks conflicted about this* *on one hand, he hates the Bourbons and all they stand for* *on the other hand, his daughter would be a queen*
Frankie: perhaps I should let Monsieur le Comte de Morny explain this. He's better informed than I am.
Louis: either you explain it, Majesty, or not at all. I will not have that...ordure speak.
Frankie: *mildly* and tell me, Uncle Louis...how is the Comtesse Castelvecchio? And your son[2]? I hope you didn't tell them that they weren't allowed to join for dinner on my account.
Louis: *huffs* *puffs*
Frankie: Monsieur le Morny?
Morny: *speaking to Frankie* *like the rest of the table doesn't exist* as I was saying to your Majesty, the duc de Polignac has recently been released from prison. There were several terms of his release. Most notably, that he is...essentially confined to his country estates and he is not allowed to visit or stay in Paris-
Louis: *tone of "you idiot"* the duc is married. Even if the chambre des Pairs annulled the marriage.
Morny: quite, your Majesty. But regardless of whether or not the duc's marriage is annulled or not, he still has a son from his second marriage to Lady Campbell...namely Armand. There's a daughter as well, but I've heard that the young lady wishes to become a nun. As of right now, Armand is unmarried. And living at Frohsdorf. But the terms and conditions of his father's ban from Paris do not apply to him. So her Royal Highness will be...most welcome in Paris. Not to mention wealthy and well connected.
Louis: *to Hortense* you did this.
Hortense: I did no such thing, Louis. That it has become so unbearable that you cannot handle the slightest disagreement from me, that I must automatically be the root of all ills. This was all François' doing. While very few of the court at Frohsdorf - likely the duc de Polignac as well - are no more in favour of than you, the truth is that, like marrying you, sometimes in life, we all have to do something we don't like.
*pin drop silence*
Frankie: *says something to Hortense* *she calms down*
Louis Napoléon: you spoke of two gifts? *his tone is like he doesn't regard this as a gift* *and hoping the second option is better*
Frankie: I wish you to visit your father-in-law at *French pronunciation* Point Brice-
Louis Napoléon: *shocked* what?
Frankie: did I stutter?
Louis Napoléon: you would exile me?
Frankie: *mildly* of course not. *tone is like "you did that yourself"* but rather that I cannot send you back to Spain, now can I? I cannot send you to Greece - as I originally intended - Europe would be...most upset at hearing this. Especially after your...recent actions. I have no doubt that the sultan will think I plan on becoming Emperor of Constantinople! You owe your freedom to your mother's doing, if it were up to me, I'd have left you in prison. It would've served you better to become a martyr like Uncle Lucien, but your mother has convinced me otherwise. So I must do something with you otherwise I look weak where if I'd left you in jail or to be executed, I would be thought cruel. And your father can no doubt give you a few pointers about the good that appearing weak does.
Louis Napoléon: so you would send me to America?
Frankie: it was not my first consideration. I was considering Alaska. Or perhaps Australie. But then I suspected that neither the British nor the Russians would thank me for doing that. Brasil, well, I have no desire to inflict you on my cousin. Mexico is too unsettled. What with what's happened in Tejas this last year. So that leaves the United States. Your passage is booked out of Livorno in three days on the Eliza Dane, I trust you will have everything settled by then. Mostly since that was the only extension I could persuade Grand Duke Leopoldo to give you before he has you arrested and expelled.
Louis Napoléon: it would be better than what you want me to do-
Frankie: which is what? You haven't allowed me to explain what I want you to do in America.
Louis Napoléon: then explain yourself, Majesty
Frankie: your recent actions will no doubt make you unpopular among monarchs in Europe. Indeed, Madame Royal tells me that Metternich was suspending my grandfather's letters to me to give the impression we had fallen out over your behaviour-
Hortense: *surprised* Madame Royal wrote to you?
Frankie: I was as surprised as you are, Madame. But clearly she has a stronger sense of loyalty to her benefactors than your husband does. *to Louis Napoléon* Your unpopularity with the monarchs this side of the ocean, will no doubt equal how well you will be regarded in the United States. The brave rebel standing up against the tyrannical king. I can see you being besieged by the press already. *smiles*
Louis Napoléon: *seems somewhat mollified*
Frankie: but it's not all fun and games. You will call on Uncle Joseph, on your Aunt Elizabeth[3]'s father and your cousins, Jerome and his charming wife. And the Prince de Pontecorvo down in Florida. I have already written and the Princesse de Pontecorvo and Madame Bonaparte will be expecting you. They have taken to the idea of your visit quite well. And if you were to meet any of their family, you will find the United States charmingly agreeable. You will laugh at all their jokes and agree with all their sentiments. And take the time to remind them of all the good that France - that is the Bonapartes as well as the Bourbons - have done for them. And stress how devoted and loyal to a Transatlantic Alliance we can be-
Louis Napoléon: why?
Frankie: *sighs in a "give me strength tone"* clearly you slept through history class. There is a reason that both the Comte d'Aranda and Monsieur Chateaubriand - and most recently, Monsieur de Tocqueville - have all suggested that a friendship with the United States is most beneficial. Imagine a triangle - if you will - alliance between Paris, Washington and Rio de Janeiro. It would rule the Atlantic Ocean. Now imagine how beneficial it would be to keep the nosy British out of Brasil or the Caribbean.
Louis Napoléon: *pictures it*
Frankie: now imagine what they would say of you who convinced them that this was a good idea.
*suddenly Louis Napoléon & Charlotte are chattering excitedly to their brother/father-in-law about going*
Hortense: Britain will object.
Frankie: Britain will always find something objectionable when they are not the ones holding all the cards. But I suspect they can be bought off. The comte de Chambord already recommended it to D. Sebastian before he left, and Prince Albert of Coburg is already on board with it: supporting the abolition of the slave trade. Fortunately, Louis *looks at his cousin* has no views either way about it. And his marrying his daughter to a man who the British have recently had to reimburse for the slaves he owned will settle any ruffled feathers among those in America I do-
Hortense: you support the abolition of the slave trade [4]
Frankie: if my father had he would've never lost Saint Domingue and would certainly never have had to sell Louisiane to the Americans. Even if I feel that Saint Domingue has known nothing but chaos since they left France.
Charlotte: *says something about how her kids will enjoy America*
Frankie: I'm afraid, they will stay in Europe, Madame
Louis Napoléon: you cannot do that
Frankie: I can and I am. They will stay here. Be brought up here. Educated here. Besides...what sort of life do you think that is for them?
Louis: *nods* I agree. As someone who spent most of my life bouncing around from one place to the next with my mother and then my brother...it'll be best if these children stay in Florence *aka with me*
Frankie: actually, they will be raised by the queen of Holland.
Hortense&Louis: what?
Frankie: Uncle, with your health [5], and the queen of Spain's weak heart [6], I wouldn't dream of saddling you with your grandchildren. Who does that leave? Their grandfather in America? Their aunt and uncle in Rome when you find all of Uncle Lucien's children objectionable. Uncle Jérôme? We spoke of why he wants to arrange the marriages. So they will return to Switzerland with the queen of Holland and Monsieur Charles [Napoléon III]. Now...can we please ring for dessert?
*fade to black*
[1] let's face it, Hortense is probably the only one in the family who refers to the little girl as this. Mostly because she knows it gets her husband's goat
[2] Jeanne Felicité Roland was the mother of Louis' illegitimate child, François Louis de Castelvecchio. First name was after none other than Frankie OTL
[3] Betsy Patterson
[4] Hortense's stance is actually not that odd. The Tascher de la Pagerie plantations in Martinique were confiscated and ruined by a slave rebellion in the Revolution, so for her - who accompanied her mother out to Martinique in 1788 and then back to France in 1792
[5] Louis had a blood disorder OTL
[6] something Charlotte inherited as well
*interior* *still the Palazzo Gianfigliati* *although it is a dining room* *and Louis, his sons, daughter-in-law and grandchildren are at the table* *Louis is glaring daggers at Hortense across the table*
Frankie: *breaks off conversation with the comte de Morny* *turns to his cousin* Louis, we are deeply touched by your loyalty to our cause. In fact, we feel that your father could take a few a pointers.
Louis Napoléon: *quietly* yes, your Majesty.
Frankie: in fact...we have two presents we wish to bestow upon you.
Louis Napoléon: your Majesty, we are honoured.
Frankie: the first is concerning your daughter
Josèphe Julie: me?
Frankie: yes, lammchen. *talking to her directly* how would you like to be a duchess?
JJ: is that like a princess?
Frankie: of course. You'd live in a much fancier palazzo than this. In Paris. You'd have pretty clothes and jewellery-
JJ: *nods emphatically*
Louis: she already has a betrothed.
Frankie: *half-amused* *reaches for his wine* to who?
Louis: Jérôme's son, the Prince de Montfort
Frankie: *Maleficent tone* well isn't this awkward. I was trying to arrange a far more...prestigious match for her than some son of a bankrupt philanderer.
Louis: to whom?
Frankie: well, it makes no difference now. If she already has a betrothal. It was just that she would've had ties to the future of England and France. But if you're set on her marrying the king of Württemberg's grandson, I see no reason to upset that apple cart unnecessarily. I suppose I will have to ask one of Lucien's daughters for it then
Louis Napoléon: *stands up* you'd insult us by offering us such a prestigious match and then denying it? So you can give it to that canaille, the prince de Canino? His sons have become nothing but bootlickers for the Carlists.
Frankie: you were the ones who pointed out that she is already betrothed. I was simply honouring an arrangement made with neither my knowledge or consent.
Louis Napoléon: Jérôme shall have to look elsewhere then *to his father* you and I both know that the only reason he has suggested the marriage between his son and JJ or Charles [Napoléon III] and Mathilde, was because he wants to get his greedy little hands on their inheritances.
Louis: *looks like he knew this8 don't talk of money at table Louis, it's vulgar and common.
Frankie: he's right, y'know *looks at Hortense*
Louis Napoléon: which of us?
Frankie: both of you. Nothing so frightfully dull as to sit a dinner table and hear a bunch of men talking of their money and business. And I'm afraid Uncle Jérôme is attempting to get around the fact that I put his inheritance in a trust. *smug* Managed by his wife. So that he can't spend it all in one place.
Hortense: I always thought how your father treated Betsy was wrong, your Majesty.
Frankie: how my father treated many women was a crime, Madame
Hortense: *to her son* this is a good match for Josephine [1]. In fact, one of the best matches she could get at the moment. And certainly oceans away from a mere son of a king with no kingdom.
Louis: *scoffs* yet you would offer her to the duc de Bordeaux
Frankie&Hortense: *look atone another guiltily*
Louis Napoléon: *looks conflicted about this* *on one hand, he hates the Bourbons and all they stand for* *on the other hand, his daughter would be a queen*
Frankie: perhaps I should let Monsieur le Comte de Morny explain this. He's better informed than I am.
Louis: either you explain it, Majesty, or not at all. I will not have that...ordure speak.
Frankie: *mildly* and tell me, Uncle Louis...how is the Comtesse Castelvecchio? And your son[2]? I hope you didn't tell them that they weren't allowed to join for dinner on my account.
Louis: *huffs* *puffs*
Frankie: Monsieur le Morny?
Morny: *speaking to Frankie* *like the rest of the table doesn't exist* as I was saying to your Majesty, the duc de Polignac has recently been released from prison. There were several terms of his release. Most notably, that he is...essentially confined to his country estates and he is not allowed to visit or stay in Paris-
Louis: *tone of "you idiot"* the duc is married. Even if the chambre des Pairs annulled the marriage.
Morny: quite, your Majesty. But regardless of whether or not the duc's marriage is annulled or not, he still has a son from his second marriage to Lady Campbell...namely Armand. There's a daughter as well, but I've heard that the young lady wishes to become a nun. As of right now, Armand is unmarried. And living at Frohsdorf. But the terms and conditions of his father's ban from Paris do not apply to him. So her Royal Highness will be...most welcome in Paris. Not to mention wealthy and well connected.
Louis: *to Hortense* you did this.
Hortense: I did no such thing, Louis. That it has become so unbearable that you cannot handle the slightest disagreement from me, that I must automatically be the root of all ills. This was all François' doing. While very few of the court at Frohsdorf - likely the duc de Polignac as well - are no more in favour of than you, the truth is that, like marrying you, sometimes in life, we all have to do something we don't like.
*pin drop silence*
Frankie: *says something to Hortense* *she calms down*
Louis Napoléon: you spoke of two gifts? *his tone is like he doesn't regard this as a gift* *and hoping the second option is better*
Frankie: I wish you to visit your father-in-law at *French pronunciation* Point Brice-
Louis Napoléon: *shocked* what?
Frankie: did I stutter?
Louis Napoléon: you would exile me?
Frankie: *mildly* of course not. *tone is like "you did that yourself"* but rather that I cannot send you back to Spain, now can I? I cannot send you to Greece - as I originally intended - Europe would be...most upset at hearing this. Especially after your...recent actions. I have no doubt that the sultan will think I plan on becoming Emperor of Constantinople! You owe your freedom to your mother's doing, if it were up to me, I'd have left you in prison. It would've served you better to become a martyr like Uncle Lucien, but your mother has convinced me otherwise. So I must do something with you otherwise I look weak where if I'd left you in jail or to be executed, I would be thought cruel. And your father can no doubt give you a few pointers about the good that appearing weak does.
Louis Napoléon: so you would send me to America?
Frankie: it was not my first consideration. I was considering Alaska. Or perhaps Australie. But then I suspected that neither the British nor the Russians would thank me for doing that. Brasil, well, I have no desire to inflict you on my cousin. Mexico is too unsettled. What with what's happened in Tejas this last year. So that leaves the United States. Your passage is booked out of Livorno in three days on the Eliza Dane, I trust you will have everything settled by then. Mostly since that was the only extension I could persuade Grand Duke Leopoldo to give you before he has you arrested and expelled.
Louis Napoléon: it would be better than what you want me to do-
Frankie: which is what? You haven't allowed me to explain what I want you to do in America.
Louis Napoléon: then explain yourself, Majesty
Frankie: your recent actions will no doubt make you unpopular among monarchs in Europe. Indeed, Madame Royal tells me that Metternich was suspending my grandfather's letters to me to give the impression we had fallen out over your behaviour-
Hortense: *surprised* Madame Royal wrote to you?
Frankie: I was as surprised as you are, Madame. But clearly she has a stronger sense of loyalty to her benefactors than your husband does. *to Louis Napoléon* Your unpopularity with the monarchs this side of the ocean, will no doubt equal how well you will be regarded in the United States. The brave rebel standing up against the tyrannical king. I can see you being besieged by the press already. *smiles*
Louis Napoléon: *seems somewhat mollified*
Frankie: but it's not all fun and games. You will call on Uncle Joseph, on your Aunt Elizabeth[3]'s father and your cousins, Jerome and his charming wife. And the Prince de Pontecorvo down in Florida. I have already written and the Princesse de Pontecorvo and Madame Bonaparte will be expecting you. They have taken to the idea of your visit quite well. And if you were to meet any of their family, you will find the United States charmingly agreeable. You will laugh at all their jokes and agree with all their sentiments. And take the time to remind them of all the good that France - that is the Bonapartes as well as the Bourbons - have done for them. And stress how devoted and loyal to a Transatlantic Alliance we can be-
Louis Napoléon: why?
Frankie: *sighs in a "give me strength tone"* clearly you slept through history class. There is a reason that both the Comte d'Aranda and Monsieur Chateaubriand - and most recently, Monsieur de Tocqueville - have all suggested that a friendship with the United States is most beneficial. Imagine a triangle - if you will - alliance between Paris, Washington and Rio de Janeiro. It would rule the Atlantic Ocean. Now imagine how beneficial it would be to keep the nosy British out of Brasil or the Caribbean.
Louis Napoléon: *pictures it*
Frankie: now imagine what they would say of you who convinced them that this was a good idea.
*suddenly Louis Napoléon & Charlotte are chattering excitedly to their brother/father-in-law about going*
Hortense: Britain will object.
Frankie: Britain will always find something objectionable when they are not the ones holding all the cards. But I suspect they can be bought off. The comte de Chambord already recommended it to D. Sebastian before he left, and Prince Albert of Coburg is already on board with it: supporting the abolition of the slave trade. Fortunately, Louis *looks at his cousin* has no views either way about it. And his marrying his daughter to a man who the British have recently had to reimburse for the slaves he owned will settle any ruffled feathers among those in America I do-
Hortense: you support the abolition of the slave trade [4]
Frankie: if my father had he would've never lost Saint Domingue and would certainly never have had to sell Louisiane to the Americans. Even if I feel that Saint Domingue has known nothing but chaos since they left France.
Charlotte: *says something about how her kids will enjoy America*
Frankie: I'm afraid, they will stay in Europe, Madame
Louis Napoléon: you cannot do that
Frankie: I can and I am. They will stay here. Be brought up here. Educated here. Besides...what sort of life do you think that is for them?
Louis: *nods* I agree. As someone who spent most of my life bouncing around from one place to the next with my mother and then my brother...it'll be best if these children stay in Florence *aka with me*
Frankie: actually, they will be raised by the queen of Holland.
Hortense&Louis: what?
Frankie: Uncle, with your health [5], and the queen of Spain's weak heart [6], I wouldn't dream of saddling you with your grandchildren. Who does that leave? Their grandfather in America? Their aunt and uncle in Rome when you find all of Uncle Lucien's children objectionable. Uncle Jérôme? We spoke of why he wants to arrange the marriages. So they will return to Switzerland with the queen of Holland and Monsieur Charles [Napoléon III]. Now...can we please ring for dessert?
*fade to black*
[1] let's face it, Hortense is probably the only one in the family who refers to the little girl as this. Mostly because she knows it gets her husband's goat
[2] Jeanne Felicité Roland was the mother of Louis' illegitimate child, François Louis de Castelvecchio. First name was after none other than Frankie OTL
[3] Betsy Patterson
[4] Hortense's stance is actually not that odd. The Tascher de la Pagerie plantations in Martinique were confiscated and ruined by a slave rebellion in the Revolution, so for her - who accompanied her mother out to Martinique in 1788 and then back to France in 1792
[5] Louis had a blood disorder OTL
[6] something Charlotte inherited as well
he doesn't have the relationship with his aunts and uncles that his dad had. And no doubt he can make decisions about them without being clouded by the emotions of shared upbringing. To him, they're all equally worthy of being shot
hopefully not the last either
While love of family is very importante i can SEE where Franz is coming from, Napoleon Made blunders with his family, the biggest beign takimg Joseph from Naples and putting him in spain.
Daddy Daycare
Soundtrack: Franz Xaver Süssmayr: Das Namenfest Children's Cantata - Finale: Welche Freude, Welche Lust [1]
*interior* Caroline de Berri is in her box at the Vienna Opera House* *with her in her box is Henri* *Prince Albert of Coburg and Prince William of Saxe-Weimar [2]* *as well as the Princesse de Faucigny-Lucinge and the marquise de Charette[3]*
Henri: *talking to his half-sister*
Usher: Her Royal Highness, the Princess of Salerno.
Henri: *breaks off his conversation as the princess enters* *all men rise*
Salerno: your Majesty *kisses his hand* cousin *kisses Caroline on both cheeks*
Caroline: cousin.
Salerno: may I be the first to congratulate you on your daughter's marriage
Caroline: you are too kind *motions for her cousin to take Albert's chair*
Salerno: and our nephew [Reichstadt] has not made a poor showing of himself either. It was rather funny to hear my sister complaining about him taking her jewellery as though she had anyone in Parma to show them off for.
Caroline: it was most kind of him, cousin. Unnecessary, but kind, all the same.
Salerno: he has always been a good boy. No matter how Prince Metternich has slandered him.
Caroline: how can I help but like him, when he has done nothing but good for my son *fondly watches Henri laughing with Albert and William* he has given my son back to me, after all.
Salerno: *drops voice* it is about that I wish to speak to you.
Caroline: my son?
Salerno: *looks at Faucigny-Lucinge and Charette* your role as a mother.
Caroline: what of it?
Salerno: our nephew is delayed in Florence, apparently there is some difficulty he has to mediate between one of the Messieurs Bonaparte and their wife. And he will not be returning to Vienna when he planned to.
Caroline: I'm sorry to hear that.
Salerno: unfortunately, there is a rather...delicate matter that this has caused some difficulties for him. And he has asked me to request your assistance. It is only temporary. Just until he returns.
Caroline: what service could I possibly do for him?
Salerno: *motions to the usher*
Usher: *allows two children inside* *one is a little boy of 9yo* *he is leading two little girls of 5yo and 3yo*
Salerno: *about the boy* this is Franz, he is my husband's son with Fraulein Eissler-[4]
Henri: the ballerina?
Salerno: yes, your Majesty. *looks at he little girls* and these are his sister
Caroline: *realizes as she watches the little girls curtsey to Henri* oh
Salerno: our nephew has...taken a special interest in them. But unfortunately, Fraulein Eissler is due to appear at the Opéra in Paris, followed by a run in London and then return to Vienna via Berlin, Weimar and Leipzig. In eighteen months.
Caroline: that is a long time for children to be away from their mother *her tone is like any time is too long*
Salerno: those were our nephew's words. And he apologizes most profusely for even daring to consider making such an imposition on you.
Henri: why would he feel that? *gestures to his half-sisters* did he think we would feel ashamed of them? Perish the thought.
Caroline: *to Salerno* my son is right, you may inform our nephew that there is no need for him to hurry home. They will be well cared for. *three year old is trying to scramble up into her lap* *five year old grabs her sister to stop her*
Caroline: *picks th three year old up like it's her own child* *to Salerno* what's their names?
5yo: *curtseys* Therese, madame, and that's my sister, Karoline.
Henri: *chuckles as he looks at his mom* oh, he's very...very good.
[1] this was written for a birthday celebration to be sung by the grandchildren of the celebrant, Baron Lang von Langenau. The title translates as "what happiness, what joy", so this could be around Henri's 16th birthday. It ends with the triumphant "Vivat das Grospapa, soll leben, soll leben" (Long live Grandpapa, long may he live, long life!). The other movements focus on things like the baron's happy and fruitful marriage. The children's own respect and admiration for him etc. Not to mention that Lang's son racked up a pretty impressive list of credentials on battlefields like Leipzig and Waterloo, served as adjutant to both the king of Saxony then to Ferdinand d'Este as governor general of Galicia, Austrian representative in Frankfurt from 1818-1829, He wrote the German Federal War Policy Constitution and the fortification construction programme as well as a history of the wars of liberation. And in 1835 he became the commanding general of the armies in Inner Austria. While the cantata was written for Lang's dad, there's no reason to think that the only "Baron Lang von Langenau" most Viennese are familiar with is the son.
[2] son of Ida of Saxe-Meiningen, sister to Queen Adelaide in London. Who they met in Rome when he and his dad were returning from their extensive tour via St. Petersburg, Novgorod, Moscow, Tula, Vosnesensk, Kiev, Constantinople, Palermo, Naples and finally Rome. Wilhelm's dad is also on good terms with Stephanie de Beauharnais, Erbprinzessin of Baden, and has some very important posts/regard in Russian and Dutch armies. Once again, chalk this up to Frankie's beneficial influence. Even if he didn't introduce them, him letting Albert "off the leash" in Rome gave them a chance to meet socially instead of both being in the city and not meeting. Plus, as having been born and raised in England, he'd be a wonderful source of info for Albert on Victoria without having to rely on second-hand reports via Uncle Leopold
[3] these are Henri's paternal half-sisters
[4] Reichstadt had a relationship with Fanny Eissler OTL as well. Its not unthinkable to believe that it would've resulted in children.
*interior* Caroline de Berri is in her box at the Vienna Opera House* *with her in her box is Henri* *Prince Albert of Coburg and Prince William of Saxe-Weimar [2]* *as well as the Princesse de Faucigny-Lucinge and the marquise de Charette[3]*
Henri: *talking to his half-sister*
Usher: Her Royal Highness, the Princess of Salerno.
Henri: *breaks off his conversation as the princess enters* *all men rise*
Salerno: your Majesty *kisses his hand* cousin *kisses Caroline on both cheeks*
Caroline: cousin.
Salerno: may I be the first to congratulate you on your daughter's marriage
Caroline: you are too kind *motions for her cousin to take Albert's chair*
Salerno: and our nephew [Reichstadt] has not made a poor showing of himself either. It was rather funny to hear my sister complaining about him taking her jewellery as though she had anyone in Parma to show them off for.
Caroline: it was most kind of him, cousin. Unnecessary, but kind, all the same.
Salerno: he has always been a good boy. No matter how Prince Metternich has slandered him.
Caroline: how can I help but like him, when he has done nothing but good for my son *fondly watches Henri laughing with Albert and William* he has given my son back to me, after all.
Salerno: *drops voice* it is about that I wish to speak to you.
Caroline: my son?
Salerno: *looks at Faucigny-Lucinge and Charette* your role as a mother.
Caroline: what of it?
Salerno: our nephew is delayed in Florence, apparently there is some difficulty he has to mediate between one of the Messieurs Bonaparte and their wife. And he will not be returning to Vienna when he planned to.
Caroline: I'm sorry to hear that.
Salerno: unfortunately, there is a rather...delicate matter that this has caused some difficulties for him. And he has asked me to request your assistance. It is only temporary. Just until he returns.
Caroline: what service could I possibly do for him?
Salerno: *motions to the usher*
Usher: *allows two children inside* *one is a little boy of 9yo* *he is leading two little girls of 5yo and 3yo*
Salerno: *about the boy* this is Franz, he is my husband's son with Fraulein Eissler-[4]
Henri: the ballerina?
Salerno: yes, your Majesty. *looks at he little girls* and these are his sister
Caroline: *realizes as she watches the little girls curtsey to Henri* oh
Salerno: our nephew has...taken a special interest in them. But unfortunately, Fraulein Eissler is due to appear at the Opéra in Paris, followed by a run in London and then return to Vienna via Berlin, Weimar and Leipzig. In eighteen months.
Caroline: that is a long time for children to be away from their mother *her tone is like any time is too long*
Salerno: those were our nephew's words. And he apologizes most profusely for even daring to consider making such an imposition on you.
Henri: why would he feel that? *gestures to his half-sisters* did he think we would feel ashamed of them? Perish the thought.
Caroline: *to Salerno* my son is right, you may inform our nephew that there is no need for him to hurry home. They will be well cared for. *three year old is trying to scramble up into her lap* *five year old grabs her sister to stop her*
Caroline: *picks th three year old up like it's her own child* *to Salerno* what's their names?
5yo: *curtseys* Therese, madame, and that's my sister, Karoline.
Henri: *chuckles as he looks at his mom* oh, he's very...very good.
[1] this was written for a birthday celebration to be sung by the grandchildren of the celebrant, Baron Lang von Langenau. The title translates as "what happiness, what joy", so this could be around Henri's 16th birthday. It ends with the triumphant "Vivat das Grospapa, soll leben, soll leben" (Long live Grandpapa, long may he live, long life!). The other movements focus on things like the baron's happy and fruitful marriage. The children's own respect and admiration for him etc. Not to mention that Lang's son racked up a pretty impressive list of credentials on battlefields like Leipzig and Waterloo, served as adjutant to both the king of Saxony then to Ferdinand d'Este as governor general of Galicia, Austrian representative in Frankfurt from 1818-1829, He wrote the German Federal War Policy Constitution and the fortification construction programme as well as a history of the wars of liberation. And in 1835 he became the commanding general of the armies in Inner Austria. While the cantata was written for Lang's dad, there's no reason to think that the only "Baron Lang von Langenau" most Viennese are familiar with is the son.
[2] son of Ida of Saxe-Meiningen, sister to Queen Adelaide in London. Who they met in Rome when he and his dad were returning from their extensive tour via St. Petersburg, Novgorod, Moscow, Tula, Vosnesensk, Kiev, Constantinople, Palermo, Naples and finally Rome. Wilhelm's dad is also on good terms with Stephanie de Beauharnais, Erbprinzessin of Baden, and has some very important posts/regard in Russian and Dutch armies. Once again, chalk this up to Frankie's beneficial influence. Even if he didn't introduce them, him letting Albert "off the leash" in Rome gave them a chance to meet socially instead of both being in the city and not meeting. Plus, as having been born and raised in England, he'd be a wonderful source of info for Albert on Victoria without having to rely on second-hand reports via Uncle Leopold
[3] these are Henri's paternal half-sisters
[4] Reichstadt had a relationship with Fanny Eissler OTL as well. Its not unthinkable to believe that it would've resulted in children.
Personally think (I know @isabella has said this in the past) that his biggest familial blunders were rejecting Lucien's second wife and (IMO) forcing the annulment of Jérôme and Betsy Patterson's match. On paper, I get why Jérôme to Betsy made no sense. But his marriage to Katharina was a disaster from start (on her wedding day, she had to be comforted by Auguste Amalie of Bavaria because her new husband was paying more attention to Stéphanie de Beauharnais than to his wife. Even Napoléon thought this was not on) to finish (basically, he treated her almost as shabbily as he treated his third wife). Betsy was the only one who would've "hit back" (as it were).
Those as well. Napoleon loved his family, but the man sure was stubborn and always thought he knew best.
AIUI, Klementine didn't really have a choice regarding her husband's bastard. But I could definitely see it being a case of her actually just trying to drop the two little girls into Caroline's daycare rather than Frankie necessarily asked that Caroline do it. Hell, it might've been something like he asked Klementine to "they're staying at my Palais on the Wallnerstrasse, if you could just check in on them", to which Klementine is like "Hell no". She might not have a choice for Franz, but Therese/Karoline are both definitely "not my monkeys, not my circus". Then she sees Caroline showing up at the theatre and basically softsoaps the woman into taking them.
Since Louise's departure, Caroline's probably been focusing a lot of her attention on Faucigny-Lucinge and Charette as sort of "proxies". Plus, they're both mothers already as well, so she no doubt has some "granny fever" going on. And I think she's probably always regarded Frankie in the same light as the two girls for the simple reason that it's "easier" to think of him as a "loyal bastard son" than a potential rival for the throne of France. And, given Frankie's mommy issues and an overweening urge to "fix things" in the family, I could definitely see him latching onto Caroline and Madame Royal as surrogate moms (same as he did to Empress Karoline).
I am absolutely loving all it
I do not have a precise opinion on Jerome and Betsy, but trying to separate Lucien from Alexandrine was a big mistake for Napoleon, reason for which I would like a lot a scenario in which Napoleon do not forced a wedding between Louis and Hortense, marrying her to one of his aides, and so having him free for marrying the Dowager Queen of Etruria, who would likely prevent his OTL reaction to Lucien’s remarriage
OK, so just to clarify - Therese and Karoline are Reichstadt's children, correct?