User Tools

Site Tools


stories:hairplane

The Hairplane

Personal ship of Justin Pickard in the AH.com The Series. Also called the Virus Ship, as it was the place from which Pickard deployed his Stereotypica Virus, dropping virus bombs on unsuspecting worlds. Although capable of space travel and shifting between timelines, the craft looked more like an aeroplane, hence the name. Pickard himself retorted that 'It's not a ship - it's a Plane of Awesomeness!'

The Hairplane was so called because Pickard's unbelievable mane of studenty hair extended throughout the whole ship and covered the outside in a mass of matted, trailing hair that appeared to serve as a form of armour plating. Pickard could also extend his will through the hair, calling on tendrils to grab enemies who attacked him in his chamber. The crew was made up entirely of bald men who served Pickard in exchange for the secrets of hair.

As well as being able to drop virus bombs, the Hairplane was armed with a technobabblyon particle cannon, which fired three green balls of technobabblyon-particle energy. These weapons were effective at penetrating enemy ships' shields and shutting down their systems, but their effects could be mitigated by the use of Blue Schvaedschuez armour.

The Hairplane infected many timelines with its virus, including the original Stereotypica world (possibly Pickard's homeworld), Deutscherwelt, a Caribbean holiday paradise world, and many others. After the attack on Deutscherwelt, in which the virus mutated and left the entire population as stereotypical Germans, the mercenary crew of the Germans was formed to hunt down the Plane and raise money to fund attempts to cure the virus.

The Hairplane was damaged at the battle of The King's timeline, in which the combined forces of the AH.commers, Germans and the King managed to prevent it from releasing its bomb. After a brief repair at the Hub, Pickard was betrayed by his new crew member The Bald Imposter and the ship was destroyed when it tried to attack the 'It Came From Hollywood' world. The Hairplane mostly burned up in the atmosphere, the remnants crashing into Mount Rushmore and leaving the other three presidents all looking like Lincoln.

stories/hairplane.txt · Last modified: 2019/03/29 15:14 (external edit)