Tallest Skil
Banned
Every single thing about this makes my blood boil. Human civilization doesn’t work that way.
And, because it deserves its own mention, YOU DON’T NEED A CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT TO ABOLISH A BAN ON A FOOD ADDITIVE.
The Sloppiest Alternate Histories Out There...
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Every single thing about this makes my blood boil. Human civilization doesn’t work that way.
And, because it deserves its own mention, YOU DON’T NEED A CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT TO ABOLISH A BAN ON A FOOD ADDITIVE.
Chris Oakley
Banned
As long as we're discussing AH fail, have any of you read the short story train wreck known as "That'll Be The Day" by Barbara Delaplace and Jack C. Haldeman II? Lousy dialogue, unbelievable plot, botched ending, and the most thoroughly incompetent characterizations I've seen to date in any AH publication. Buddy Holly must be doing barrel rolls in his grave.
For spoilers, how does it depict Buddy Holly?
I've got one: News from the Front, by Harry Turtledove.
Boy, oh, boy (OTOH, I recommend his Anne Frank survives story. Far better than some of his other work. And I thought that in TL-191, his having a black character shoot Featherston was awesome. Only I would have had him use a flamethrower, to prepare Featherston for the fires of hell.)
I've got one: News from the Front, by Harry Turtledove.
Boy, oh, boy (OTOH, I recommend his Anne Frank survives story. Far better than some of his other work. And I thought that in TL-191, his having a black character shoot Featherston was awesome. Only I would have had him use a flamethrower, to prepare Featherston for the fires of hell.)
Watch out Confederate-sympathising blasphemers, we've found our Gordon McSweeney!
usertron2020
Donor
Any Unspeakable Seamammal story that goes to the level of an absolute fall and conquest of the British Empire, and acts like the only possible Prime Minister that the British Empire can ever find for itself anywhere ever is is the arch-appeaser Lord Halifax, a peer who cannot sit in the House of Commons.
Turtledove's end of his TL-191 Great War, where the North finally has the South right where they want them and and instead say-basically,-Fuck it, let's just grab a few parts of a few states and go home. After all, our writer wants to do a World War Two TL-191 and sell a lot more books
. He can't do that if we win it all right now twenty years sooner.
Turtledove's end of his TL-191 Great War, where the North finally has the South right where they want them and and instead say-basically,-Fuck it, let's just grab a few parts of a few states and go home. After all, our writer wants to do a World War Two TL-191 and sell a lot more books
. He can't do that if we win it all right now twenty years sooner.Turtledove's end of his TL-191 Great War, where the North finally has the South right where they want them and and instead say-basically,-Fuck it, let's just grab a few parts of a few states and go home. After all, our writer wants to do a World War Two TL-191 and sell a lot more books
Well, in Turtledove's defense...after nearly 60 years of independence, swallowing up the better part of half of the North American continent kind of does throw the Global Balance of Power off quite a bit, even if you are the victor, taking a third of Canada and turning it into a US puppet, and also completely wiping the Confederate States off of the map kinda changes things a little too much, even for your victorious allies I imagine. So there's some logic behind it, even if as President in that situation I'd have simply taken back the rump of Main taken by Canada in the 1880s and then re-integrate the Confederacy whole.
Ultimate Paragon
Banned
There was one TL that had Ethiopia conquering virtually all of Africa because the Crusader States were more successful. No, I don't have a link, nor do I remember where I found it or what it's called.
The computer game Titanic: Adventure out of Time has you changing history pretty dramatically:
-No World War I because a necklace and the RL copy of the Rubaiyat are not used to finance the Black Hand and, among other things, they do not assassinate Franz Ferdinand (since I guess those are the only ways to raise money and that's only way to trigger a war in 1910s Europe).
-No World War II because Adolf Hitler's painting (the one used painted in 1914) is made famous for getting off the Titanic and he becomes a famous painter, irregardless of if World War I happens or not.
-No Soviet Union because of a Tsarist spy's list of names (including Lenin, Stalin and Trotsky) is delivered to the Okhrana and they're all hunted down. No mention about the whole "autocracy" thing.
Mixing and matching items saved from the ship gives such delights as Soviet Europe, Nazi Europe and Hitler nuking London.
-No World War I because a necklace and the RL copy of the Rubaiyat are not used to finance the Black Hand and, among other things, they do not assassinate Franz Ferdinand (since I guess those are the only ways to raise money and that's only way to trigger a war in 1910s Europe).
-No World War II because Adolf Hitler's painting (the one used painted in 1914) is made famous for getting off the Titanic and he becomes a famous painter, irregardless of if World War I happens or not.
-No Soviet Union because of a Tsarist spy's list of names (including Lenin, Stalin and Trotsky) is delivered to the Okhrana and they're all hunted down. No mention about the whole "autocracy" thing.
Mixing and matching items saved from the ship gives such delights as Soviet Europe, Nazi Europe and Hitler nuking London.
Or more succinctly, they only care about making cents. Lots and lots of cents to add to their bank account.
Just like any other published fiction author in history. This is neither wrong nor evil. By the same token, where does it say that they have to write everything to the exacting standards of AH.com?
That's not to say that the quoted examples aren't bad. They are really, really bad.
AussieHawker
Banned
A Really bad Book named INVASION by Eric L. Harry. The Blurb tells you how bad it is.
"When the Chinese Dragon woke from her two thousand year slumber to Ruthlessly bend Southeast Asia to her will, It was the culmination of every half decent intelligence analysts prediction"
What? Considering that this book is set in 2030 this is a steaming pile of Bullshit. Apparently China wasn't still being the worlds biggest all the way into the middle ages.
"The colplacent Western powers turned a blind eye to this rampant expansionism, and defense spending continued to dwindle all over the free world"
Hey China you know how you raped South Korea and magically defeated the Indian army. Well we don't really care.
"Only when the Middle east was swiftly conquered by the resurgent Chinese Forces, Israel brutally put down and Tel Aviv, did America and her allies realize the true danger of their isolationist stance."
Because Fuck logistics and guerrilla Warfare. We're motherfucking China.
"But it was too late... A combined Chinese fleet was cornered and annihilated by the massed Chinese super carriers (psst they are oil tankers with a bolted on flight dock. Because magic) in the Straights of Gibraltar (totally not within range of most of the land based Air power in Europe.) Leaving a besieged Europe. Now a dazed USA sits and waits for the next move ... INVASION
Some of the key gems is the Germans fighting in the Balkans to stop the advancing Chinese and getting worn down by partisans. Apparently the people in the Balkans hate Germans more then the Invading ENEMY. Another is the Indian army destroying their nuclear weapons with GRENADES instead of using them. If by some magic the Chinese and Pakistanis are defeating you effortless (China apparently only took 1.5 million dead to take India) then use your bloody Nukes. It is kinda the reason you have them.
I would post more but I can't be bothered.
"When the Chinese Dragon woke from her two thousand year slumber to Ruthlessly bend Southeast Asia to her will, It was the culmination of every half decent intelligence analysts prediction"
What? Considering that this book is set in 2030 this is a steaming pile of Bullshit. Apparently China wasn't still being the worlds biggest all the way into the middle ages.
"The colplacent Western powers turned a blind eye to this rampant expansionism, and defense spending continued to dwindle all over the free world"
Hey China you know how you raped South Korea and magically defeated the Indian army. Well we don't really care.
"Only when the Middle east was swiftly conquered by the resurgent Chinese Forces, Israel brutally put down and Tel Aviv, did America and her allies realize the true danger of their isolationist stance."
Because Fuck logistics and guerrilla Warfare. We're motherfucking China.
"But it was too late... A combined Chinese fleet was cornered and annihilated by the massed Chinese super carriers (psst they are oil tankers with a bolted on flight dock. Because magic) in the Straights of Gibraltar (totally not within range of most of the land based Air power in Europe.) Leaving a besieged Europe. Now a dazed USA sits and waits for the next move ... INVASION
Some of the key gems is the Germans fighting in the Balkans to stop the advancing Chinese and getting worn down by partisans. Apparently the people in the Balkans hate Germans more then the Invading ENEMY. Another is the Indian army destroying their nuclear weapons with GRENADES instead of using them. If by some magic the Chinese and Pakistanis are defeating you effortless (China apparently only took 1.5 million dead to take India) then use your bloody Nukes. It is kinda the reason you have them.
I would post more but I can't be bothered.
