The Rise of the Dragon: An Altered History of the World Wrestling Federation

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Like the better exit for Sammartino...

Good update; my guess on the two matches that will go long are the Hogan-Steamboat and Hart-Savage match (Hart-Savage in their primes would be a good match; as it is, Hart is just starting to hit his peak)...

Looking forward to the NWA Clash of Champions and WrestleMania IV updates (whenever they drop, of course)...

I wonder what the 3-letter abbreviation for TTL's *WCW will be...
 
Since Jerry Jarrett is running the show I'm hoping and praying for no LOLTNA/WCW moments here. Actually there's one thing that I noticed from the alumni and that is Jim Cornette is mentioned. Cornette in 1990 left WCW because of amongst other things he hated Jim Herd but he started Smoky Mountain Wrestling in 1991 is that going to be a part of WCW? I only ask because the number of people who went on to better things that started in Smoky Mountain was impressive for example Chris Jericho, Lance Storm, Glenn Jacobs, Chris Candido just to name a few were all there and those are good young hungry guys to have in a roster, I'm now even more convinced a Jarrett run promotion is going to end up more like TNA having great young guys and instead of building your company on them your going for ex NWA and WWF guys.
 
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Fun update. I did watch Wrestlemania IV and I noticed quite a few changes. In OTL, the Intercontinental title match was between the Honky Tonk Man (the champion) and Brutus "the Barber" Beefcake. You mentioned Brutus earlier - will he not become the Barber ITTL?

Keep it up. Looking forward to more!
 
The update for Wrestlemania 4 (and Clash of the Champions) is in the works, and hopefully will be finished soon. Until then, please place your bets on winners of both shows below. :p

Also, question time!

Like the better exit for Sammartino...

I also like it; it struck me as inevitable that a bigger focus on actual wrestling in the WWF was going to put Bruno in a much better mood when he retired ITTL.

I wonder what the 3-letter abbreviation for TTL's *WCW will be...

I've dropped some hints throughout the TL, if you look closely. ;)

Since Jerry Jarrett is running the show I'm hoping and praying for no LOLTNA/WCW moments here. Actually there's one thing that I noticed from the alumni and that is Jim Cornette is mentioned. Cornette in 1990 left WCW because of amongst other things he hated Jim Herd but he started Smoky Mountain Wrestling in 1991 is that going to be a part of WCW? I only ask because the number of people who went on to better things that started in Smoky Mountain was impressive for example Chris Jericho, Lance Storm, Glenn Jacobs, Chris Candido just to name a few were all there and those are good young hungry guys to have in a roster, I'm now even more convinced a Jarrett run promotion is going to end up more like TNA having great young guys and instead of building your company on them your going for ex NWA and WWF guys.

You have a sharp eye. My mouth, however, is staying shut. ;)

I can say the following things, though: #1) Cornette will not form Smoky Mountain Wrestling ITTL, and #2) there's a reason I only included a partial list of alumni!

Fun update. I did watch Wrestlemania IV and I noticed quite a few changes. In OTL, the Intercontinental title match was between the Honky Tonk Man (the champion) and Brutus "the Barber" Beefcake. You mentioned Brutus earlier - will he not become the Barber ITTL?

You are correct, the Barber gimmick is butterflied away. I do eventually have a gimmick in mind for Beefcake, however, and it's about as cheesy as that of a hairdresser...

You put "Junkfood Dog" on the Wrestlemania card. Good update, but I'm still cracking up on that one...

That's all Dave Meltzer's doing! He really did used to refer to Junkyard Dog as "Junkfood Dog" in late-80's versions of the Newsletter.
 
A minor update: I've gone back and added threadmarks for every post so far. So if you'd like to re-read the TL, or experience a particular moment again, just go to the index, and it'll all be right there.

The next update should be done before Christmas, so keep your eyes peeled! :)
 
March 1988: Clash of the Champions
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March 27, 1988

The first Clash of the Champions special airs on TBS Superstation. Filmed live at the Greensboro Coliseum in front of a crowd of about 6,200 fans, the special draws a 5.9 rating. [1] Aired on the same day as Wrestlemania 4, the show is a deliberate attempt to give Vince McMahon a taste of his own medicine by airing a show on free TV on the same day as a pay-per-view, which the WWF had done to Crockett’s company before when they aired the first Royal Rumble for free in competition to Crockett’s Bunkhouse Stampede PPV in January 1988. While the show doesn’t really help or hurt Wrestlemania 4’s profitability (probably due to the huge draw of Hogan vs. Steamboat), the show is a success, and is seen as a slap in the face to Vince McMahon.

The show begins with a grudge match between up-and-coming heel Venom and established babyface “Gorgeous” Jimmy Garvin, in which the younger Venom puts away the veteran. Next, Lex Luger puts his NWA TV Title on the line against “The Dog-Faced Gremlin” Rick Steiner, and “The Taskmaster” Kevin Sullivan surprisingly appears at ringside to watch. As Luger has Steiner in the torture rack, the Taskmaster manages to distract both Luger and the referee on the outside, allowing Steiner to slip out of the rack and hit a bulldog on Luger, getting the 1-2-3 and becoming the new TV Champion. Post-match, Steiner and Sullivan beat down Luger, drawing blood from the Total Package for the first time in his NWA career. In an interview later in the broadcast, Sullivan states that Steiner is under his management now, and promises “more men to come”.

Another short—but bloody—match occurs next, with the Road Warriors, Robert Gibson, and a partner of their choosing taking on the Powers of Pain and the Sheepherders in a match where the ring ropes have barbed wire woven into them. [2] Several months prior, Road Warrior Animal suffered a (kayfabe) eye injury at the hands of the Powers of Pain, forcing Animal to wear a hockey mask for protection, [3] and the Sheepherders had injured Gibson’s tag team partner Ricky Morton in a bloody attack. The babyfaces choose “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan as their mystery partner. The match lasts less than four minutes, but features both Sheepherders bleeding due to the barbed wire. After Barbarian accidentally hits Warlord with a diving headbutt, Animal gets the pinfall for his team.

Dusty Rhodes defends his U.S. Title against Arn Anderson in the penultimate match of the night. Despite a valiant fight from Rhodes, the Enforcer of the Four Horsemen manages to pull out a victory due to a distraction from his stablemates, winning the title to the humiliation of the American Dream.

The highly anticipated main event sees NWA Champion Magnum T.A. putting his title on the line against Ric Flair in a steel cage match. [4] Scheduled for a 45-minute time limit, the match has a panel of “guest judges” at ringside: referees Gary Juster and Sandy Scott, Penthouse model Patty Mullen, and actors Jason Hervey from The Wonder Years and Ken Osmond from Leave It to Beaver (the latter who conducts an amusing interview with Jim Cornette earlier in the broadcast). [5] The match goes a long time without any clear-cut advantage from either man, seeing several near-falls from both Flair and Magnum. With only a few minutes left on the clock, Flair locks on the Figure Four. Magnum struggles in the hold for several agonizing moments, but still refuses to submit. As the clock ticks down, Magnum manages to counter the hold by turning onto his stomach, putting the pressure on Flair’s knee. As Flair screams in pain, still refusing to submit, time expires. The decision of the match thus falls to the judges, who award the match to Magnum T.A. in a 3-2 decision (only Mullen and Hervey vote for Flair). [6]

Clash of the Champions Results
Venom def. “Gorgeous” Jimmy Garvin (w/ Precious) (7:22)
NWA Television Championship: Rick Steiner (w/ Kevin Sullivan) def. Lex Luger (C) (9:39) – TITLE CHANGE!
Barbed Wire Match
: Jim Duggan, Robert Gibson & The Road Warriors (Animal & Hawk) (w/ Paul Ellering) def. The Powers of Pain (Barbarian & Warlord) & The Sheepherders (Luke Williams & Butch Miller) (w/ Rip Morgan) (3:31)
NWA United States Championship: Arn Anderson (w/ Tully Blanchard & Mike Rotunda) def. Dusty Rhodes (C) (11:03) – TITLE CHANGE!
NWA Championship – Steel Cage Match
: Magnum T.A. (C) vs. Ric Flair ended in a time-limit draw (45:00)

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[1] IOTL, there were about 6,000 fans in attendance, and the special drew a slightly lower 5.6 rating.

[2] IOTL, a similar match occurred with Dusty Rhodes and the Road Warriors taking on the Powers of Pain and Ivan Koloff.

[3] As OTL.

[4] IOTL, this was a standard match between NWA Champion Ric Flair and challenger Sting. The match, which is considered an all-time classic, is seen by many fans as the one that established Sting as a main-event level wrestler. Sadly, due to Sting’s injury, he’s not at that level yet, and it remains to be seen when he’ll get there ITTL…

[5] All as OTL.

[6] The decisions were much different IOTL’s match: Mullen decided in favor of Flair, Juster awarded the match to Sting, and Scott considered the match a draw. Hervey and Osmond, for some reason, never made an official decision.

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All apologies about the lateness of this update. I promise the next two will come much faster, and will be much meatier.

As the NWA tries to offer Vince McMahon a taste of his own medicine, Clash of the Champions turns out to be just as much a financial and critical success as OTL. But can the WWF counter with an even better show? And how about the newly formed WCW?

Coming up: Hogan. Steamboat. One will be champion, and one will leave the WWF. Who will stand tall at Wrestlemania?
 
Good update and looking forward to WrestleMania IV...

BTW, one of the overlooked reasons why the WWF succeeded in expansion was because of their location. The WWF is located in Stamford, Connecticut, which is 30 miles from New York City (in fact, it's part of the New York metropolitan area) and Madison Square Garden (along with Nassau Memorial Coliseum and the Meadowlands Arena) in NYC is their home arena...

And, in the 1980s (and even to this day), New York was the media capital of the US (followed closely by Los Angeles, of course), so McMahon probably had a lot of connections to get the tapes of his shows to the local affiliates nationwide, and at a cheaper price than what the regional wrestling companies were giving to the local affiliates (the only wrestling promotion that competed with the WWF/E for a while was the NWA/WCW (1), which had support from Ted Turner, since it was broadcasted on his SuperStation), IMO...

Just my .02 on why McMahon succeeded...

(1) And WCW went out of business because of their downright idiotic decisions from 1998-2000; hell, it should be taught to business classes as an example of what not to do to succeed...
 
Wrestlemania 4: Hogan Heeds the Dragon's Words
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March 27, 1988

SteamPunk, the WWF Blogger – Post Date 3/20/2013
Classic WWF PPV Review: Wrestlemania 4


And here I go. Again. On my own. Going down the only road I’ve ever known…

Today, as we continue our look at ‘Manias gone past, we’ll be looking at Wrestlemania 4, which comes to us live from—allegedly, anyway—the Trump Plaza Casino in New York City. I say “allegedly” because this show actually centered from the nearby Atlantic City Convention Hall, the longtime host of the Miss America pageant. Because Donald Trump loves him some beautiful women. Thankfully, Scary Sherri doesn’t appear on the card tonight, or Trump might have called the show off then and there. This PPV also saw several good matches, as well the epic final clash between Ricky Steamboat and Hulk Hogan, in which one of them would leave the WWF for good. Well, at least for a while. Let’s get to it.

Gene Okerlund is in the ring and welcomes us to the show. He introduces Gladys Knight (sadly with no Pips), who sings the national anthem.

Your commentators are Gorilla Monsoon & Jesse Ventura. Jesse says he’s glad he’s with Monsoon, and not with that idiot Vince, who knows nothing about wrestling. Anytime you can thumb your nose at your boss without getting in trouble is a good day in my book.

22-man Battle Royal: King Tonga, The Tonga Kid, Koko B. Ware, Sika, “Jumpin’” Jim Brunzell, B. Brian Blair, “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff, Bad News Brown, Sam Houston, Ron Bass, “Natural” Butch Reed, Greg Valentine, Dino Bravo, Shawn Michaels, Marty Jannetty, Ken Patera, Nikolai Volkoff, Boris Zukhov, Repo Joe, Hillbilly Jim, Brutus Beefcake and George “The Animal” Steele – The winner will receive a big trophy which will definitely not be smashed. Steele stands on the outside for a while, but eventually climbs into the ring. [1] Houston goes out first, followed by Patera. A bunch of guys gang up on Sika and eliminate him. Steele dumps Tonga Kid out. Hey, no fair, George! This is the Kid’s last PPV! Repo Joe and Steele start brawling, but Steele grabs Repo and throws him out with ease. Repo pulls a little blue stuffed animal out of his tights (um…make of that what you will…) and Steele just goes berserk, climbing out of the ring, eliminating himself. The two men brawl to the back. Someone kill me, please. Koko gets dumped by King Tonga, and Ron Bass throws out Jannetty. Seconds later, Shawn Michaels catches Bass from behind to eliminate him. Don’t screw with the Rockers! Hillbilly Jim hits a clothesline in one corner to Orndorff, then another in the opposite corner to one of the Bees, but the Red Army double clothesline Jim out to stop his momentum. Butch Reed throws out Blair (the Iron Sheik would be proud), but Brunzell dropkicks Reed out seconds later. Beefcake hits an atomic drop on Valentine and tries to dump him out, but Valentine saves himself before taking the Beefer down with a clothesline. Tonga then hits a legdrop on them both, just for the hell of it. TONGA WILL DESTROY YOU ALL! Boris goes for a lariat on Bravo, but Bravo ducks and clotheslines Boris out. Beefcake and Valentine are up now fighting on the ropes, and Valentine manages to tip Beefcake over after a little bit of a struggle. Valentine climbs back in and hits a forearm on Tonga, and knocks the big man over the top. Bravo goes for a side suplex on Bad News, but a Ghetto Blaster to the head stops him, and it’s Bad News for the Canadian strongman as he falls over the top rope to the floor. Down to six now. Volkoff back body drops Michaels out, but Valentine knocks Volkoff out seconds later. Brown tosses out Brunzell. We’re left with Orndorff, Brown, and Valentine. Valentine fights off both heels for a while, but the numbers game catches up with him, and an Orndorff backbreaker stops him in his tracks. Bad News and Orndorff dump Valentine out to a gale of boos, and both men gloat in the ring. BUT WAIT! GHETTO BLASTER TO ORNDORFF! Never trust Bad News! Out goes Orndorff, and Bad News Brown wins the match at 9:23. The referee tries to hold his hand up, but Brown is having none of it. He wants his trophy, damn it! The refs present it to him, but out of nowhere comes Orndorff, who knocks Brown out of the ring. He grabs the trophy and smashes it to pieces, raising the broken bits of it in the air as the crowd cheers. This wasn’t bad, although the ensuing Steele-Joe feud was extremely cringy, and it led to perhaps the worst match I’ve ever seen. [2] Still, this was a pretty fun time-killing match, involving most of the guys on the roster who weren’t in a prominent upper or midcard feud at the time. Bad News winning and then Orndorff turning face and smashing the trophy at the end was a great moment as well. Brown and Orndorff feuded for a while after this, which culminated in a “Harlem Brawl” match on Saturday Night’s Main Event that was amazingly brutal for the time. **

Backstage Interview – Mean Gene is with Honky Tonk Man and Johnny V. They show a clip of the episode of The Wrestling Challenge where Honky was “interrupted” by Snuka during one of his interviews, which led to this match. [3] Honky’s comments about Snuka here are so racist, they’d make Archie Bunker blush. Honky says a stupid Tarzan wannabe like Snuka can’t appreciate his great singing and guitar playing, so tonight he’ll beat some sense into Snuka. Johnny V says Honky will send Snuka back to the jungle where he came from. This was honestly painful to sit through. I can’t in good conscience give this any rating due to how awkward and unsettling it was. DUD

Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka vs. Honky Tonk Man (w/ Johnny V) – And now I have to sit through this. Wonderful. Honky attempts to jump Snuka as he’s getting into the ring, but the Superfly does some “tribal moves” that startle Honky. Snuka takes down Honky with chops and a headbutt. Honky goes for an axe handle, but Snuka blocks it and hits a forearm off the middle rope. Honky rakes the eyes and puts Snuka in a headlock for a while, but Snuka reverses it. Snuka irish whips Honky and tries to hit a move off the ropes, but Johnny V trips Snuka on the outside. Superfly goes out to confront Johnny, but Honky hits an axe handle to the back of the distracted Snuka. Honky climbs back in the ring and dances for the crowd before battling with Snuka on the apron, but a Superfly headbutt sends Honky to the mat. Snuka hits a clothesline, but Honky fights back with a series of blows to the midsection. Honky chokes Superfly on the ropes, then hits a fist drop for a 2-count. Kicks from Honky, but Snuka starts a comeback, building up fire before hitting a clothesline, a jawjacker, and a backbreaker in quick succession. Damn, the old man is pulling out all the stops tonight. Snuka goes up top, but Johnny distracts him. Honky hammers Snuka in the head with another axe handle (can’t this fool do any moves besides that?), but Snuka no-sells it, and Honky tries to flee. Snuka knocks Honky down, climbs to the top, and connects with the Superfly Splash for a 3-count at 5:01. Johnny V climbs in and starts putting the boots to Snuka as Honky rolls out of the ring, but Snuka recovers and chops Johnny in the corner. Honky climbs back in with his guitar, and wails on Snuka with two hard shots that look like they really hurt. Thankfully, this is a prop guitar, unlike WM3. Snuka awesomely no-sells both shots, roaring at Honky as the Elvis impersonator flees in fear. Snuka grabs what’s left of the guitar and smashes it up (what’s with the babyfaces destroying personal property tonight?) to the joy of the crowd. Jesse hilariously remarks that Snuka should be disqualified for destroying the guitar, even though the match is already over. This match was OK for what it was, and thankfully it didn’t go very long. Snuka would leave the WWF after this, but he’d be back around 1994. Unfortunately, the newer generation had taken over the spotlight, and he left within a year.

Backstage Segment – Mean Gene is backstage with Paul Roma & Jim Powers, and asks them if they’re excited about the Gloria Estefan concert later. Roma says nobody cares about Gloria Estefan. Just like nobody cares about you, Roma. He’s pissed that the Young Guns weren’t even put on the show. Powers asks why is there a concert on a wrestling show? Okay, that complaint I can get behind. Suddenly, Demolition show up in their full-on leather and chains and weird bondage shit. Ax says Johnny V is already upset that Honky Tonk Man lost, and he doesn’t need to hear the Young Guns whining, too. Powers says if Demolition want them to shut up, they’ll have to make them. Hammer says they accept. I’m no Demolition fan, but this was about as good a promo as you’ll get from them. And even though Roma & Powers brought up some good points, they still suck. Interestingly, both teams were heels here, so this could be seen as the start of Demolition’s babyface turn later in the year. *

Demolition (Ax & Hammer) vs. The Young Guns (Paul Roma & Jim Powers) – So it looks like we’re getting this impromptu match right now. This PPV keeps getting better and better… Roma tries to lock up with Hammer, but Hammer overpowers him from the get-go. Hammer irish whips Roma, but Roma fakes him out before Hammer can hit a clothesline. Powers tags in and both Guns begin double-teaming the Demos, hitting several pretty nice armdrags and an elbow off the top turnbuckle. Hammer recovers and tags in Ax, and they clubber Powers in the heel corner. A back elbow from Ax, followed by a boot from Hammer in the corner. Hammer tags back in and locks a nerve hold on Powers, then stomps him into the mat. Ax tags back in and hits a scoop slam, but Powers hits a kick that staggers Ax long enough for him to make the tag. Roma goes for a dropkick, but Ax moves, sending Roma crashing down flat on his back. One Decapitation later, and it’s over at 2:48. A glorified squash if I’ve ever seen one. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: Demoliton are just a poor man’s Road Warriors. They weren’t far away from their babyface run with the Tag Titles at this point, which wasn’t that great, in my opinion. Still, this match was fine. *

WWF Tag Team Championships: The Fabulous Rougeaus (Jacques & Raymond) (w/ Jimmy Hart) (c) vs. Team Victory (Tito Santana & Rick Martel) – Speaking of the Tag Team Titles! Tito and Jacques lock up to start, and Tito backs Jacques into the corner and hammers him with knees. Tito tags in Martel, who hits a nice-looking hip toss on Jacques followed by a clothesline in the corner. Jacques fights him off with chops and tags in Raymond, who grounds Martel with a cross armbar for a little while. Martel fights back with a back suplex, followed by a gutwrench that gets a 1-count. Martel goes for a clothesline, but Rougeau ducks and hits a dropkick. The Rougeaus isolate Rick for a minute or two, getting a 1-count off a savate kick. Jacques goes for a knee drop, but Martel moves, and Tito and Raymond tag in at the same time. Tito starts running over Raymond with a bunch of armdrags, and a very nicely done headscissors takedown grounds the Rougeau. Raymond fights out, knocking Tito down with a back elbow before tagging in Jacques, who gets a 2-count off a back kick. Tito fights back and gets the hot tag to Martel, who starts unloading with offense, getting a 2-count after a sick-looking crossbody. After a hip toss, Martel locks on the Boston crab, but the other Rougeau breaks it up. Tito clotheslines Raymond to the outside, and Martel goes for a slingshot splash, but Jacques rolls through it and pins Martel to retain the titles at 10:02. Tito barely misses being able to break the pinfall, and he and Martel argue for a moment or two in the ring while the Rougeaus and Jimmy celebrate on the outside. Jesse claims Tito should have focused more on the match and not on the illegal Rougeau, but Monsoon insists it was an honest mistake. I wish this match had gone on slightly longer as there was a lot more these two teams could have done here, but this was definitely the best match of the night so far. Lots of great action, and the subtle tease of dissention between Martel and Santana was well done. Team Victory, of course, didn’t split up right away, as Martel had to take time off to care for his sick wife in late 1987. [4] The split would come later, and as you all know, would lead to the most recognizable gimmick Martel ever had. ***½

Backstage Interview – Mean Gene has Ted DiBiase and Virgil, and he asks DiBiase if he’s worried about facing a man as vicious as the Junkyard Dog. DiBiase says JYD should consider it a privilege that he’s even soiling his hands with this match. He says—and I’m quoting here— “Men like the Junkyard Dog shouldn’t even be in the same ring as me.” Wow. Just…wow. DiBiase says Virgil knows his place, and he’s a happy man for it. Virgil turns his head toward DiBiase, but he doesn’t say a word—nice subtle hinting at something there, but of course it’ll be a pretty long time. Tonight, the Junkyard Dog will discover that dogs like him should be at the foot of a man, especially the Million Dollar Man. DiBiase, as usual, is great on the mic, but the subtly racist nature of this promo just made it so awkward and unentertaining. ½*

“The Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase (w/ Virgil) vs. The Junkyard Dog – A bit of history: these two were both employed in Mid-South Wrestling in the early ‘80s, and they had a long-running feud against one another. DiBiase beat JYD for the North American Championship, then sent him out of the company in a “Loser Leaves Town” Match in 1982. [5] If you’re a hardcore wrestling fan, I recommend checking out some of their bouts pre-WWF; they’re very entertaining. But I digress—this is the cartoon world of the WWF we’re talking about, where racism and subtle jokes about slavery abound. You know, this PPV is starting to become less and less appealing to me as I watch it… DiBiase and JYD lock up to start, but the Dog backs Ted into the corner, hammering the Million Dollar Man with a couple of hard lariats. JYD goes for an abdominal stretch, but DiBiase gets out of it with a hip toss, followed by a knee drop for a 2-count. DiBiase goes for an irish whip, but JYD sends Ted to the outside, where Virgil tends to him and sends him back in. JYD goes down on all fours, but Virgil gets on the apron to distract him. DiBiase takes the opportunity to lock on the Million Dollar Dream, and after struggling for a minute or two, JYD finally passes out at 3:17. Virgil climbs in the ring as Ted laughs maniacally at the fallen Dog. Virgil pulls out a $100 bill and gives it to Ted, who stuffs it in JYD’s mouth. A short match that was nothing more than a glorified squash, but if anything, it got DiBiase over massively as a heel. ½*

Backstage Interview – Mean Gene has Davey Boy Smith and Jimmy Hart with him, and he asks what his strategy is facing his former stablemate. Davey Boy says Neidhart was always jealous of the success of not only him and Dynamite Kid, but Bret Hart as well, and that’s the reason the Hart Foundation fell apart. Jimmy says that tonight, Neidhart has no one in his corner, and he’s going to fall prey to the Bulldog. This promo wasn’t bad—Davey Boy was still green on the mic, but he was learning, and Jimmy Hart helped with his schtick as well. **

Backstage Interview – Jesse Ventura has taken a break from the announce table to interview Jim Neidhart before the next match, and Ventura asks if it bothers Neidhart that Bret Hart’s competing for a title tonight, and he’s not. Anvil says that has nothing to do with his match tonight. Jesse says the Anvil has to be jealous that Bret appears to be getting a better opportunity than he is tonight. Neidhart then turns to the camera and apologizes to everyone watching for Jesse’s dumb questions. He says tonight, he’ll give Davey Boy what he deserves. Jesse has a look on his face like someone just killed his cat. It cuts back to Monsoon at the announce table without Jesse saying a word. Although it planted a small seed for a heel turn for Neidhart, this was mainly played for laughs, and I won’t lie: it did make me chuckle a bit. Not bad. ***

Jim “the Anvil” Neidhart vs. Davey Boy Smith (w/ Jimmy Hart) – Monsoon asks whether this match will either be a match full of scientific finesse, or one of brute force. That’s almost like asking if you’re going to have a sunny or a rainy day in spring—there’s very little in-between. Ventura berates Neidhart for the rest of the match for being so rude to him earlier. “Such is the insufferable life of a journalist like you, Jesse, right?” ”You have no idea what I have to endure, Monsoon.” God, I love the banter between these guys! Oh yeah, I have a match to watch… Davey backs Neidhart into a corner and hammers him, then hits a shoulder block that Neidhart no-sells. Neidhart clotheslines Davey to the outside, and Smith regroups with Jimmy for a few moments. Both men lock up, and Bulldog goes for a side headlock, then grounds Neidhart with a hip toss. Uppercut from Neidhart, followed by a crisscross that Davey turns into a drop toehold and a nerve hold. Neidhart makes it to the ropes, knocking Davey down, and an elbow drop gets a 1-count. Davey locks on a single-leg Boston crab, but Anvil fights out and hits a back elbow that grounds Neidhart, then a series of shots in the corner. Neidhart fights back, but Smith ducks a charging Anvil, sending him spilling to the outside. Jimmy Hart shouts at Anvil with the megaphone, and when the ref’s back is turned, Jimmy tries to hit him with it. Neidhart reverses it, sending Jimmy into the ringpost to the cheers of the crowd. However, Smith grabs Neidhart from behind, smashing his face into the apron. Davey throws Neidhart back in and hits an axe handle from the top that gets a 2. Davey tries for the running powerslam, but Neidhart slips out and hits a stiff clothesline into the corner. Jimmy climbs on the apron, but Neidhart knocks him off to the joy of the crowd. After a bit of back-and-forth, Anvil hits a powerslam and gets the pin at 7:34. Jimmy Hart climbs in the ring and starts laying the boots to Neidhart, and Davey joins in soon after. Smith holds Neidhart up while Jimmy shouts at him with the megaphone, but the Anvil ain’t out yet, bitches—he kicks Jimmy in the stomach, elbows Smith in the gut, and throws them both out of the ring to a big ovation from the audience. Not a bad match, and I like how they incorporated several submission holds into it despite neither man being a big mat technician. Both men would continue with their singles careers, and Davey would have quite a bit of success with his—nothing on par with Bret Hart, of course, but still not shabby. **

Don Muraco (w/ Superstar Billy Graham) vs. “Cowboy” Bob Orton (w/ Mr. Fuji) – Muraco had turned on Orton at Survivor Series after being fed up with the heel Ace’s ineptness, and this is a grudge match between the two. Orton jumps Muraco before the bell rings and starts stomping him to the mat. He chokes Muraco with his own jacket before taking him down with a really stiff clothesline. Like, his arm didn’t even move. The ref throws Bob’s jacket out as Bob just slaps Muraco’s head. Several punches from Orton stagger Muraco, but the Magnificent one recovers with a right hand off the ropes and some chops. Muraco hits the “cymbal hands” on Orton, then several shots in the corner. A bulldog to the canvas followed up by a boot to Orton’s head, but the Ace rakes Muraco’s eyes. Cowboy Bob hits a nice shoulderbreaker to Muraco, then slams his arm against the ringpost. Orton gloats to the crowd to a shower of boos, then hits several knees in the corner. Bob works Muraco’s arm for a long time as Fuji and Superstar yell from ringside. Not gonna lie, this is pretty boring. Muraco counters by pushing Cowboy Bob to the mat, and gets a surprise 1-count. Back to more arm wringing (goody, goody), but Muraco manages to fight to his feet, and backs Orton into the corner, forcing him to break the hold. Snapmare and a knee drop from Muraco, followed by a headbutt suspiciously close to Cowboy Bob’s nether regions. Good thing Randy was already born at this point! Bob hits a scoop slam and tries to hit a crossbody off the top, but Muraco gets the knees up. Muraco goes for a clothesline, but Bob reverses into a chinlock. Bob goes for an Oklahoma roll, but he grabs the ropes for leverage, and the ref notices it. This allows Muraco to counter into a roll-up, getting the surprise 3-count at 8:29. Bob tries to argue that Muraco grabbed the tights, and the replay clearly shows him grabbing for Orton’s bright green tights. Gorilla tries to explain that it was after the 3-count. Sorry, Gorilla, I’m with Bob and Jesse on this one! As for the match, it wasn’t anything special, but it did blow off an intense feud. This was Bob’s last high-profile match in the company, as he’d be gone after ‘Mania and didn’t really do much else. Muraco hung around for a while, but he also wasn’t used for much other than feeding upper-card stars. Wow, when you put it into perspective, this was kind of a depressing end for these two guys… **

The Gloria Estefan concert is up next, and it actually gets the crowd pretty pumped. Gloria sings a medley of “Conga”, “123”, and “The Rhythm is Gonna Get You”. Pretty straightforward stuff, and although I’m not the biggest Gloria fan (I mostly know that duet she did with Selena in the ‘90s), this was pretty fun.

Backstage Interview – Mean Gene has Bamm Bamm Bigelow, and he asks him what his thoughts are about having to face “perhaps the greatest superstar” in the history of the WWF. Bigelow says he’s sick of everyone calling Andre the greatest. Tonight, after he not only defeats, but embarrasses Andre, everyone will be calling Bamm Bamm Bigelow the new greatest of all time. Bigelow was actually pretty good here, and it got across that he was a threat to Andre. **

Andre the Giant vs. Bamm Bamm Bigelow – Bigelow dodges a punch from Andre by rolling around the ring, then the two lock up. Andre starts choking Bigelow on the ropes, then locks him in a sleeper hold. Gorilla says he had dinner with Andre the night before. I hope they had plenty of wine at the restaurant… Andre continues choking the life out of Bigelow for a minute or two, but Bigelow fights out by backing Andre into the corner, and staggers Andre with a clothesline. Andre gets tied up in the ropes, and Bamm Bamm hammers the giant for a little bit, dodging a kick from the Giant before Andre finally gets loose. Bigelow hammers Andre for a moment, but Andre no-sells it, delivering a big chop to Bigelow’s chest that looks very painful. Andre locks on the bear hug, and Bigelow struggles for a long time before his arm drops once. Twice. Three times, and it’s over at 7:16. Andre throws Bigelow out of the ring, and the ref raises the Giant’s hand in victory. A pretty dull match, to be honest, and it was pretty tough to sit through, but I’ll bump up the score since it gave Andre an amazing 4-0 record at ‘Mania. According to legend, Andre sandbagged Bigelow during this match because of his bad backstage attitude, but I didn’t really see it in this match. Bigelow would depart the WWF on a leave of absence soon after this night, and didn’t come back until the mid-90s, after he’d competed in a few other promotions. As for Andre, this would sadly be his last Wrestlemania match before his untimely death, but at least the man got to go out undefeated at the big stage. *

Backstage Interview – Mean Gene is interviewing Bret Hart before his big match with Randy Savage for the Intercontinental Title. Gene asks what are Bret’s thoughts before the biggest match of his career? Bret says holding the Tag Team Titles as part of the Hart Foundation for over a year was one of the best feelings he’s ever had, and he can only imagine how Savage feels holding a title for over two years. But tonight, he has a chance to prove that he’s more than a tag specialist—he’s going to show Savage and the whole world that he’s the best there is when he takes the Intercontinental Title. Bret usually wasn’t much on promos, but I did like this one—it conveyed that he was a young upstart trying to dethrone a legendary champion like Savage. Good job. ***

Backstage Segment – In a stand-alone interview, Randy Savage talks about being the IC Champion for two full years. He says he defeated Roddy Piper at Wrestlemania two years ago, and he’s still going strong. He’s taken on everybody, and he’s not afraid of anyone in the WWF. The Macho Man has vanquished all comers, and he plans on being IC Champ for a lot longer. Savage respects Bret Hart and everything he’s done, and he hopes he has a bright career, but tonight, Macho Madness will continue to roll along. DIG IT! As usual, this was a great Macho Man promo, and he continued to carry himself very well as Champ. It’s why many fans still consider him the best Intercontinental Champ of all time. ***

WWF Intercontinental Championship: Randy “Macho Man” Savage (c) (w/ Miss Elizabeth) vs. Bret “Hitman” Hart – Fun fact: this was one of the first babyface vs. babyface matches done by the WWF. Due to this, Jesse Ventura has uncharacteristically kind words to say about both men. [6] Savage and Liz are dressed in matching yellow attire tonight. Both men lock up, and Savage shoves Bret into the corner, hitting several knees to the gut. He goes for a running boot, but Hart moves, and Randy puts on the brakes at the last second. Hart gets to his feet, and he and Savage exchange a look. Randy nods and smiles as Hart rubs his hands together. Monsoon says these two are in the prime of their career, and appear to be evenly matched. Jesse says Savage has a “veteran” advantage, but Bret Hart has youth on his side. They lock up again, and this time Hart pushes Savage to the corner before laying the boots to him. Savage reverses it, throwing Bret into the opposite corner, hitting an elbow and a few right hands. A nice double reversal exchange occurs where Randy goes for an irish whip, but Bret ends up whipping Savage back into the corner. Boots to Savage, followed by a snapmare takedown that only gets a 1-count for Bret. Bret cinches on a headlock, but Randy quickly fights out and hits a back elbow. Elbow drop gets a 1-count on Bret, and Savage goes for a chinlock. Hart fights out, hitting a boot to the gut followed by a knee drop for 2. Savage catches Bret with a boot, then an elbow, before draping the Hitman’s back across the ropes. Savage knocks Bret off the ring apron into the barricade, and as Bret slowly gets to his feet, Savage climbs to the top and goes for a flying clothesline to the outside. However, Bret catches Savage with a shot to the gut, and both men go down. Elizabeth tends to Savage, but also seems to show Bret some concern as well. Both men make it back in the ring before a 10-count, and Hart hits some shots to Savage’s torso. He knocks Randy down, then hits a legdrop for a 2-count. Savage is hung in the tree of woe, and Hart gets some shots in before Savage flops to the inside. Piledriver from Hart for a 2-count. Ventura says it takes great intestinal fortitude to kick out of a piledriver. Andy Kaufman knew this very well… The Hitman whips Savage into the corner, but Savage dodges a charge, knocking Bret into the turnbuckle. Savage throws Bret into the opposite corner, then hits a double axe handle that gets a close 2. Bret recovers and hits a backbreaker that gets 2. I’ve lost count of the near-falls so far. Bret cinches on a leg scissors, and Savage fights his way to the ropes after struggling for a while. Bret staggers to the second rope for an elbow drop, but Macho Man moves, sending Bret crashing down. Savage leaps over the top, draping Hart’s throat across the top rope, but a pinfall attempt only gets a 2-count. Savage rakes Bret’s back and backs him up to the ropes, and has an altercation with the ref before Bret backdrops Savage to the floor. Ventura says it’s in Savage’s interest to get intentionally DQ’d, since he’d keep his title. Monsoon says that’s not the kind of champion Savage is. “Well then, he’s an idiot!” Jesse retorts. Golden. Liz checks on Savage, who looks like he hurt his foot. Hart stands over Savage, looking both concerned and frustrated. Monsoon says it can’t end this way. Liz has taken off Savage’s boot, and he climbs back in limping with only one boot on, but still motions for Bret to come at him. Bret looks concerned, but he goes right for Savage, targeting the ankle. Savage fights back, ramming the Hitman into the turnbuckle before going for a cover, but he only gets 2. Hart quickly recovers and locks on a one-leg Boston crab, but Savage gets to the ropes. Bret hammers Randy for a while, but Savage rakes the eyes. Bret goes for a suplex, but Macho counters with a jawjacker that almost gets 2. Bret goes for a clothesline into the corner, but Savage moves, and Bret clocks his head on the turnbuckle. Savage slowly climbs to the top and hits the elbow drop, and everyone thinks it’s over. BUT BRET KICKS OUT. The place goes nuts, and Savage pulls out his hair. The announce say no one has ever kicked out of the flying elbow before (which isn’t true, incidentally). Savage picks Bret up and goes for a slam, but Bret reverses it into an inside cradle to get the surprise 3-count at 20:57. The fans go NUTS. Savage has a look of absolute shock on his face, and Bret is smiling jubilantly. The announcers are stunned, and as Finkel announces the Hitman as the winner, Monsoon says that Savage’s 2-year-long reign with the title is officially over. Bret holds the title aloft as Liz climbs into the ring to help Savage up. Savage hobbles over to Bret, and a tense staredown occurs for a moment before Savage starts to applaud, patting Bret on the chest before leading the crowd in applause for the new champion. Freaking AMAZING match—bar none, one of the best in ‘Mania history. The near-falls, the incorporation of both technical and high-flying styles, and the storytelling of Macho Man’s injured ankle were done to near perfection. Savage’s reign with the IC belt, is of course, the longest in history at 721 days. Even today, he’s considered the greatest IC Champion of all time. But Bret was no slouch; he’s up there with the best as well. And of course, this wasn’t the last time these two men would meet for a title…but that’s another story. ****¼

A video package airs for the upcoming Jake Roberts-Rick Rude match, featuring the amazing buildup of Rude picking Jake’s wife Cheryl out of the crowd, Rude eliminating Jake from the Royal Rumble, and Rude handcuffing Jake and basically molesting Cheryl. Maybe this is considered tame nowadays, but back then it was so intense.

Jake “the Snake” Roberts (w/ Cheryl Roberts) vs. “Ravishing” Rick Rude – Bobby Heenan isn’t at ringside, and Monsoon explains that Heenan is busy preparing Hogan for the main event tonight. Jesse asks Monsoon how he knows that, when Jesse is supposed to be the investigative reporter that knows everything. Rick Rude tries to hit on Cheryl, but he takes his eye off Jake, who starts hammering him in the corner. Jake Irish whips Rude into the other corner, clotheslines him, then locks on an armbar. Rude writhes and screams in pain for a few moments before dropping to his knees, then Jake hits like fifty knee shots to Rude’s lower back. He still hasn’t let go of the armbar. The crowd are already chanting “DDT”. Cheryl is smiling at ringside. Rude finally gets out of the hold, whips Jake across the ring, and goes for a clothesline, but Jake kicks Rude in the stomach. Jake goes for the DDT, but Rude rolls out to avoid it. Roberts grabs Rude by the hair and brings him back in, but Rude rakes Jake’s eyes. Rights and elbows from Rude send Roberts to the mat, and Rude stands over him, smiling. Jake climbs slowly to his feet, but Rick continues pounding him. Roberts starts to fight back with a series of rights, then goes for a boot in the corner, but Rude moves, then drops an elbow on the downed Roberts before posing over him again. Rude ties Roberts up in the ropes, then heads outside for Cheryl. Cheryl backs away, and Jake catches Rude before he can do anything, throwing him back in the ring. Inverted atomic drop from Rude, followed by a chinlock. Jake struggles for a while before the ref drops Roberts’ arm once. Twice. Jake stays up on the third, and fights out of the hold with a jawbreaker. Roberts goes for a slam, but he can’t get all of it, and Rude falls on him for a 2-count. Rude locks on the chinlock again. Cheryl starts pounding the mat with both hands, and Jake eventually powers out, throwing Rude to the outside. Jake climbs out, runs Rude into the post, and slams him onto the floor. He throws Rude back in, and he’s screaming and pleading now. Gutbuster from Jake, followed by a facebuster and a knee to Rude’s face. Roberts smiles at Cheryl on the outside, and we see the burlap bag with Lucifer inside wriggling. Jake goes for the DDT, but Rude scrambles away. Jake grabs him by his tights, and we actually see his fucking asscrack as Jake drags him back in! They tried to cover it later by saying Rude had flesh-colored undies, but I saw the full moon plain as day. Comedy at its finest! Jake goes for a bulldog, but Rude sweeps his legs under him and both men go down. Rude slowly climbs to the top, hitting a forearm to Roberts’ throat before smiling at Cheryl, who looks both disgusted and bored at the same time. Probably more of the latter. Rude attempts a pin, but only gets 2. Rude Awakening from Rude, but Jake gets his foot on the rope as Rick tries to pin him. Rude crawls on his hands and knees over to Cheryl, wiggles his eyebrows at her, and tries to kiss her through the ropes, but Cheryl slaps him in the face. Jake sneaks up behind Rude and rolls him up, getting the 3-count at 11:42. Rude snaps, attacking Jake and hitting him with a shot in the corner. He gyrates at Cheryl some more, but Jake is back up, and he has the snake out. Rude hightails it out of the ring, and Jake, Cheryl and Lucifer celebrate in the ring (although Cheryl doesn’t want to go near the snake). Not a bad match, but it did get a little slow at times. Still, this was an intense grudge match (not to mention the hilarious buttcrack spot), and it was far from over. The steel cage match these two would have to blow the feud off several months later was amazingly brutal, and to date is one of my personal favorite matches from this era. ***

Jesse Ventura introduces us all to Donald Trump, and the crowd cheers for the man who bought out all competitors to host the PPV. Ventura asks Trump what he thinks of the show tonight. Trump says it’s the most amazing thing he’s ever seen, and the athletes of the WWF are the most incredible performers ever. Ventura asks how they compare to Mike Tyson and Leon Spinks, and Trump says they’re much tougher than the boxers. Good thing Tyson didn’t hear that. Jesse asks Trump his opinion on the main event tonight, and the billionaire says that he’s sure it’ll be a long, tough fight, but he’s put money on the Dragon tonight. This wasn’t terrible, but I can do without seeing ‘80s Donald Trump on my screen—it’s almost surreal to see him that young. **

Backstage Interview – Gorilla sends us backstage to Robin Leach from Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous (remember that show? No? Me neither), who is on hand to interview both Hogan and Steamboat. [7] It’s Steamboat’s turn first, and Leach wants to know how Steamboat plans to defeat Hogan tonight. Steamboat says he plans to use every trick he knows to both keep Hogan down and teach him that nothing can keep the Dragon down, not even a bigger, stronger man like Hogan. And when he beats Hogan tonight, he has something to tell him that he probably won’t want to hear, but he needs to hear. Good promo, and it hinted at what was to come, which was amazing. ***

Backstage Interview – After Steamboat makes his way to the ring, Leach brings out Hogan and Bobby Heenan, both smiling with wide grins. Before Leach can say much, Heenan takes the mic and says he wants to thank Steamboat for basically just giving away his entire strategy. Hogan says Steamboat can never win, because Hogan knows all of Steamboat’s tricks. He knows what to expect in this match, and he’s got a counter for anything the Dragon throws at him. And when he wins tonight in front of Donald Trump himself, he’s gonna be on Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous, while Steamboat waits in the unemployment line, and maybe shows up at McDonald’s flipping burgers in a few months. Tonight, the Hulk runs wild on the Dragon. This promo was pretty damn good, and Hogan definitely came across as an asshole. ***½

WWF Championship – Loser Leaves WWF: Hulk Hogan (c) (w/ Bobby “the Brain” Heenan & Hercules Hernandez) vs. Ricky “the Dragon” Steamboat – On his way to the ring, Steamboat shakes hands with Trump seated at ringside. No garbage-pelting as Hogan, Hercules and Heenan make their way to the ring, because that’s too classy for a Trump-funded show. The heels get plenty of heat, though. Hogan offers Trump a handshake as well, but Trump just shakes his head at Hogan. The bell rings, and we are officially underway. The two circle one another for a while before locking up. Hogan throws Steamboat into the corner and starts laying boots to him. He goes for a punch, but Steamboat catches it and grounds Hogan with an armbar, which Hulk quickly gets out of. Steamboat smiles, mouthing “almost got you”. They both circle each other again, and Steamboat goes for another armbar, but Hogan counters it, locking on an armbar of his own to massive boos from the crowd. Steamboat gets to the ropes to break it, and both men glare at one another again. Hogan taps his forehead with a finger, smirking deviously. A takedown grounds Hogan, and the Hulkster struggles for a while before backing Steamboat into the corner, forcing a break. The two men lock in a Greco-roman knuckle lock, and Hulk gets the best of Steamboat for a while, but the Dragon soon starts to gain strength from the cheering crowd, and Hogan drops to his knees. Kick from Steamboat, followed by a running dropkick that gets a 1-count. Hogan powers out of a Steamboat headlock with a back suplex, and an elbow drop gets 2. Hogan backs Steamboat into the corner and knees him, then clotheslines him to the mat. The Dragon dodges a back elbow and hits two dropkicks in succession, then quickly climbs to the top and teases diving on Hogan on the outside, but Hulk moves out of the way. Steamboat taunts Hogan to get back in the ring, but Hogan stays on the outside conferring with Heenan. Hercules clocks Steamboat from behind, and the Dragon tumbles into the ring. The ref, who was checking with Hogan and Heenan, sees it out of the corner of his eye, and EJECTS HERCULES FROM RINGSIDE. YEAH, BABY! A lock-up, and Hogan takes down Steamboat and hits an elbow drop for another 2. Steamboat with a nervehold and an arm wrench, followed by a nice STO-looking hold before Hogan squirms to the ropes. Hogan kicks Steamboat, then backs him into the corner with some chops and punches. The fight spills to the outside, and both men trade lefts and rights. Steamboat suplexes Hogan onto the concrete, and rolls in to beat the referee’s count. Heenan helps Hogan back in the ring, and Jesse asks why Hogan didn’t just take the count-out win. A valid point from Jesse… Steamboat charges Hogan, but the Hulkster backdrops Steamboat to the outside, and the Dragon hits the concrete hard. The crowd are ready to murder Hogan as he gloats in the ring. Steamboat barely beats the ref’s 10-count back in the ring, and Hogan looks about to snap. Chops to Hogan in the corner, followed by a headscissors that gets a 2-count. Headlock from Steamboat, followed by a snapmare that gets a 2. Steamboat tries for an armdrag, but Hogan counters with a side slam for 2. Hogan climbs to the second turnbuckle and hits a Macho Man-style elbow that gets a close 2. Both men trade punches, and Steamboat goes down again. Shots to Steamboat’s head, and Hogan plays to the crowd to thunderous boos. Steamboat goes for a kick, but Hogan POPS OUT AN ENZIGUIRI that gets 2! Shots to Steamboat in the corner followed by an irish whip to the opposing corner, but Steamboat counters with a handspring elbow that staggers Hogan. Chops and a dropkick ground the champion, and Steamboat looks around at the crowd. He climbs to the top rope, but Heenan tries to stop him. Heenan gets thrown into the barricade for his trouble, and Steamboat connects with the Dragon Dive. But Hogan KICKS OUT AT 2. The crowd gasps. Steamboat can’t believe it. He picks Hogan up, but Hogan rakes the eyes and hits an ax bomber. He goes for a legdrop, but Steamboat moves and staggers to his feet. A kick to the face brings Hogan to one knee, and Steamboat goes for a running knee lift, but Hogan grabs Steamboat and hits a clothesline. He connects with the legdrop, and the announce are certain that it’s over. BUT STEAMBOAT KICKS OUT. Hogan is PISSED BROTHER~. He picks Steamboat up and hits a big boot, but when he goes for the ax bomber, Steamboat ducks and hits an armdrag, taking Hogan down to big cheers. He ascends to the top, points to the crowd, and hits the Dragon Dive, and that’s all she wrote at 30:14. An absolutely amazing match; one that deserved the hype that it got. Some people rank this as the most intense and/or best ‘Mania main event, and while I personally don’t, I can see why they would. Steamboat reigned as Champion for a pretty long time after this, having several more good title matches with the likes of Hercules, Savage and DiBiase, and Hogan, per stipulation, left the WWF…for a while, at least. ****

After the match, Heenan climbs into the ring with a mic as the ref hands Steamboat the belt, but Hogan grabs it and tries to hit Steamboat with it. The Dragon rolls to the outside to dodge. As we hear Hogan screaming “This is mine!”, Steamboat grabs a mic and cuts an ABSOLUTELY AMAZING promo to Hogan. It truly must be heard to be believed. Steamboat says Hogan got jealous when he came in to carry the title in Hogan’s absence, and just because Steamboat got more popular, Hogan decided to join up with Heenan so he could get back on top. Heenan tries to goad Hogan into attacking Steamboat, but Steamboat just screams at Heenan to SHUT UP. Freaking. AWESOME. Steamboat brings out pretty much every current babyface on the roster that has won a title in WWF up to that point. Savage, Hart, Neidhart, Santana, Martel, Muraco, Valentine, and even Ken Patera all come out and surround the ring. Steamboat backs up, parting the ropes, and tells Hogan they won’t beat him up, that he can leave peacefully. Hogan looks like he’s just been punched in the gut. Heenan screams at Hogan that he’s worthless and a piece of shit, but Hogan has had enough—he grabs Heenan and THROWS HIM OUT OF THE RING. The crowd goes absolutely apeshit. Hogan tells Steamboat “thank you, friend”, and they shake hands before Hogan hands Steamboat the title, and Steamboat holds up Hogan’s arm. The crowd cheer for Hogan as his old entrance theme plays, and he walks up the ramp, doing his poses for the audience. Steamboat and the other wrestlers stand in the ring applauding Hogan as the show ends. Bar none, one of the best moments in Wrestlemania history. [8] Of course, like I said, Hogan wouldn’t leave the company for good—he’d be back in a couple of years, as a high-tier babyface. However, he would never win the WWF Title again—which is just fine by me, as Steamboat put out some stellar matches in his several title reigns to come. *****

Overall: Like the last ‘Mania, this show is like a bag of chex mix—crunchy, pleasing cereal nuggets and breadsticks (Roberts/Rude, Savage/Hart, Hogan/Steamboat and the ensuing promo) mixed in with rock-hard, unappetizing rye chips (most of the show prior to Roberts/Rude). I recommend watching it for the tag match and the final three matches on the card, and a few promos that were at best, amazing, and at worst, chuckle-worthy. Not a bad ‘Mania, all things considered.

Overall Score: 6 out of 10

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JAY HUNTER: Now, after the match, Steamboat cuts what, I’ll be damned if it isn’t the promo of his life. Just listen to this shit:

(The audio cuts to actual audio from the show. Steamboat is climbing into the ring with a microphone, while Hogan is also in the ring holding the WWF Title belt, as well as Bobby Heenan, who is also holding a mic. Hogan looks ready to clock Steamboat at any second.)

RICKY STEAMBOAT: Wait! Wait just a minute! Hold on, Hulk—hold on. Listen to me—you have to hear me out.

HULK HOGAN: (grabs Heenan’s mic) I don’t wanna hear anything from you, Steamboat! You just—

STEAMBOAT: Yes, there is, Hulk; yes, there is! Listen to me. At one time, you were the greatest star this company had. Everyone said you would be the face of this place! You were a role model—someone these people looked up to! (People cheer, while a few boo) You know what I think your problem was? It’s jealousy! (Steamboat points to the audience) You saw how much these people loved me (People begin to cheer loudly) and you—wait, wait just a second—you got jealous!

(Hogan continues to glare, but says nothing)

STEAMBOAT: Back a few years ago, your WWF Title was taken from you in the worst way possible, so I came in and tried to carry that title with honor and prestige! And the people liked me—yeah, they really liked me! (The crowd cheers very loudly) But just—but just because I get a little bit louder cheers from these people than you did, what do you do? You join up with that Weasel, Bobby Heenan, and turn your back on all these people!

BOBBY HEENAN: (grabs Hogan’s microphone) Don’t listen to him, Hulk! He cost you your job, damn it! Destroy him! Make him pay!!

STEAMBOAT: Hogan, you can come try to beat me, but first, I have a few friends I’d like you to meet. (Randy Savage, Bret Hart, Tito Santana, Rick Martel, Greg Valentine, Jim Neidhart, Ken Patera and Don Muraco all come out from the back and surround the ring) These men—all these men, these champions and former champions—they care about this business! These people cheer for them because they respect them—they respect their hard work and dedication toward the World Wrestling Federation, and all its great fans! (More cheers from the audience. Steamboat climbs into the ring, not taking his eyes off Hogan or Heenan) That man (Steamboat points at Heenan) is nothing but garbage, Hogan! And what about Hercules, Bundy, Rude? I don’t see them anywhere!

HEENAN: You shut up!! I can have those men down here faster than…

STEAMBOAT: NO, YOU SHUT UP!! (Crowd erupts into cheers) For once in your life, let this man listen to something without you messing everything up!! Hulk, we are united in our common goal, and that is to be the best, most fighting champions we can be! But sometimes…sometimes being a champion doesn’t mean holding a trophy, or a belt. It means being sportsmanlike! It means being someone people can look at and say, ‘he deserves what he has because he worked his behind off for it’! It means being a champion (points to his chest) in here!

(The intense look is still in Hogan’s eyes, but he looks noticeably calmer. Savage, Hart, Patera, Muraco, Valentine and Team Victory climb on the ring apron, preventing Hogan or Heenan from escaping)

STEAMBOAT: Hulk…we’re not gonna beat you up. In fact… (Steamboat steps back, parting the ring ropes) You’re free to go. But just remember one thing—it’s not about how many friends you have. It’s how many you keep!

(Hogan’s face is softened, and he looks down at the canvas. Heenan gets in Hogan’s face)

HEENAN: Are you seriously going to listen to that little twerp? (Pointing at Steamboat) He just cost you your job, you pathetic piece of slime! You’re WORTHLESS, do you hear me?! WORTH—

(Hogan grabs Heenan by the collar, glaring at his manager as the audience roars with cheers. With authority, he throws Heenan through the ropes and out of the ring, drawing thunderous cheers and applause from the audience. Hogan slowly picks up the mic Heenan dropped, and looks at Steamboat)

HOGAN: Thank you…friend.

(Hogan and Steamboat shake hands as the crowd cheers loudly. Hogan raises Steamboat’s hand, both men smiling as they soak up the applause. Heenan is out cold on the outside, and Hogan’s old entrance music, “Real American”, plays. Along with Savage, Hart, Muraco and the others, Steamboat leaves the ring, all seven men clapping for Hogan as he looks out at the audience. He does his old poses to the crowd's applause)

(Audio cuts back to Jay, V1 and Mr. OOC)

JAY: The Hulkster poses, and everyone cheers like he’s going off to fucking war or something here. (laughter from all three men in the background) Yeah, it’s a cheesy way to send him off, but I guess they had to turn the man babyface again to make people care when he eventually came back.

OOC: Shhh! Nobody knows he’s comin’ back yet, you bastard! (more laughter is heard)

(More shots of Hogan posing to overdubbed music of Simple Minds’ “Don’t You Forget About Me” playing in the background)

—Excerpt from OSW Review – Episode 8: Wrestlemania 4

Wrestlemania 4 Results
20-Man Battle Royal
– Bad News Brown def. B. Brian Blair, Brutus Beefcake, “Natural” Butch Reed, Dino Bravo, George “the Animal” Steele, Greg Valentine, Hillbilly Jim, “Jumpin’” Jim Brunzell, Ken Patera, King Tonga, Koko B. Ware, Marty Jannetty, Paul Orndorff, Repo Joe, Ron Bass, Sam Houston, Shawn Michaels, Sika and The Tonga Kid (9:23)
Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka def. Honky Tonk Man (w/ Johnny V.) (5:01)
Demolition (Ax & Hammer) def. The Young Guns (Paul Roma & Jim Powers) (2:48)
WWF Tag Team Championships – The Fabulous Rougeaus (Jacques & Raymond) (w/ Jimmy Hart) def. Team Victory (Tito Santana & Rick Martel) (10:02)
“Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase (w/ Virgil) def. Junkyard Dog (3:17)
Jim “the Anvil” Neidhart def. Davey Boy Smith (6:34)
Don Muraco (w/ “Superstar” Billy Graham) def. “Cowboy” Bob Orton (w/ Mr. Fuji) (8:29)
Andre the Giant def. Bamm Bamm Bigelow (7:16)
WWF Intercontinental Championship – Bret “Hitman” Hart def. Randy “Macho Man” Savage (w/ Miss Elizabeth) (20:57) – TITLE CHANGE!
Jake “the Snake” Roberts (w/ Cheryl Roberts) def. “Ravishing” Rick Rude (11:42)
WWF Championship – Loser Leaves WWF Match – Ricky “the Dragon” Steamboat def. Hulk Hogan (w/ Bobby “the Brain” Heenan & Hercules Hernandez) (30:14) – TITLE CHANGE!

-------

#3: Steamboat sets Hogan straight

If you ask most fans, Wrestlemania 4 was a mixed bag, with several matches that dragged or didn’t really live up to the hype. However, it had its good points: Bret Hart winning the IC Title for the first time in spectacular fashion, Andre the Giant going 4-0, Jake Roberts and Rick Rude clashing over Roberts’ (now ex-)wife, and of course, the main event itself. In the months leading up to the show, the dastardly Hulk Hogan agreed to defend his WWF Title against Ricky “the Dragon” Steamboat one final time. The winner would be the champion, and the loser would quit the company. After a hard-fought match, the Dragon finally toppled the Hulk to win his third WWF Championship, but it was what happened after the match that lingers in fans’ minds. Hogan was ready to exact his revenge on Steamboat for sending him out of the WWF, but Steamboat, recruiting some help from other past champions, talked down Hogan like a fed-up child talking down a schoolyard bully, calling Hogan out for being jealous at Steamboat’s greater popularity as a top champion. After seeing the light, Hogan kicked his manager Bobby Heenan to the curb, and even though he lost his title and his job, left the company with his head held high to end the show. Of course, Hogan would be back within a couple of years, but that’s another story…

--Excerpt from bleacherreport.com article “Top 40 Moments in Wrestlemania History”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

[1] IOTL, Steele just stayed on the outside during the whole match, never even getting into the ring. According to the Animal himself, this was due to a knee injury he suffered at a house show several days prior to Wrestlemania. ITTL, the injury never happens.

[2] If you love the kind of stuff on Wrestlecrap.com, the match alluded to here is something you should definitely look forward to ITTL.

[3] Similar to this exchange from OTL.

[4] As OTL, unfortunately—Martel’s wife Johanne has ileitis, and has to have part of her intestine removed.

[5] As OTL.

[6] Similar to the way Jesse commentated the OTL Hulk Hogan vs. Ultimate Warrior match from Wrestlemania VI.

[7] Leach also appeared at Wrestlemania IV IOTL, reading the rules for the tournament for the vacant WWF Championship that dominated the show.

[8] I have to give credit for the idea for this moment from the “Rewriting the Book” article on wrestlecrap.com titled “What if…the Gobbledygooker Didn’t Hatch From the Egg at Survivor Series 1990?”, in which a similar sendoff to the one Hogan gets is given to Terry Taylor when he loses a high-profile match to Owen Hart. You can read the article here.

----------------------------------------

And just like that, it was over. Ricky Steamboat is once again the World Champion, and Hulk Hogan is redeemed of his actions. But as I’ve hinted before, his “leaving” is only kayfabe—we’ll see how his return is booked as we chug along. Also, Bret Hart has some big shoes to fill as Intercontinental Champion—will he live up to the hype?

Coming up: we take a look at the current titleholders in WWF, and how they stack up with the rest of the champions throughout the history of the company at this point. And after that: coverage of WCW’s first show. Don’t miss it!
 
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If I haven't said it before, I have to say it now - I freakin' love this timeline! This takes me back to the best days of my youth, when I lived and breathed the WWF (mid 80's - early 90's). Your writing style is evocative of the old wrestling mags like PWI that I used to read hanging out at the grocery store, waiting on mom to finish up shopping. This is top-shelf work - thanks for sharing!!
 
Good update; the detail is amazing, and it makes one feel like this is in the 1980s. Like the mention of a Gloria Estefan duet with Selena; hopefully, Selena lives ITTL (or lives longer), as her death was a tragic What Could Have Been IOTL...

Like that Hogan turned on Heenan (BTW, RIP, Bobby) and became a babyface before he left, similar to Andre the Giant turning on Heenan at WrestleMania VI after he and Haku lost the titles. When he struck Andre IOTL, even the announcers realized what a stupid move that was...

Good matches, too; looks like Bret Hart is going to rise earlier (BTW, have you read his autobiography; talk about being straightforward, as it takes guts to admit you were serially unfaithful to your first wife and the mother of your kids (1))...

Like the Wrestlecrap references; BTW, assuming Taylor comes to the WWF, please give him something other than the Rooster gimmick, as that destroyed his WWF career (and he was a fairly decent wrestler)...

BTW, the Hogan-Warrior match was at WrestleMania VI, not V (that was Hogan-Savage, a good match in its own right)...

And Rick Martel took time off to care for his wife in 1988, not 1987, IIRC (I think Rick Martel had the capability of being a good wrestler; put him up against Bret in their primes and that'd be a four-star match). God, that sounds like a bad disease his wife had; at least she got better...

Waiting for more, @The Walkman, and good TL...
 
Not sure if Hogan will still be around in this ATL by the time the Undertaker appears, though would like to have Hogan get a clean win or few over the Undertaker (not necessarily in a title match).
 
Before I get to the questions/comments, I want to say how much I appreciate every single one of you who have read this. I've been dealing with some depression lately, mainly due to loneliness and feeling stuck where I am. However, I'm getting better, and I'm very grateful to my family and friends, IRL and online, for helping me deal with some hard times.

On to the comments!

So Crockett is still considering a buyout?

Yes.

Marked out the OSW mention.

Thank you. I was worried I wouldn't do them justice, but it was a convenient way to get the full transcript of the Steamboat-Hogan promo into the narrative.

If I haven't said it before, I have to say it now - I freakin' love this timeline! This takes me back to the best days of my youth, when I lived and breathed the WWF (mid 80's - early 90's). Your writing style is evocative of the old wrestling mags like PWI that I used to read hanging out at the grocery store, waiting on mom to finish up shopping. This is top-shelf work - thanks for sharing!!

Thank you for the kind words! :happyblush

Excellent really enjoying this TL, detail is amazing.

Thank you so much!

Good update; the detail is amazing, and it makes one feel like this is in the 1980s. Like the mention of a Gloria Estefan duet with Selena; hopefully, Selena lives ITTL (or lives longer), as her death was a tragic What Could Have Been IOTL...

When we get to the '90s, we'll be seeing more about how the Latin music scene unfolds...

Like that Hogan turned on Heenan (BTW, RIP, Bobby) and became a babyface before he left, similar to Andre the Giant turning on Heenan at WrestleMania VI after he and Haku lost the titles. When he struck Andre IOTL, even the announcers realized what a stupid move that was...

I wrote and re-wrote that face turn over and over, and I'm glad you think it turned out nice. :happyblush

Good matches, too; looks like Bret Hart is going to rise earlier (BTW, have you read his autobiography; talk about being straightforward, as it takes guts to admit you were serially unfaithful to your first wife and the mother of your kids (1))...

Hart has always struck me as a guy who was bound to get to the top of the company sooner or later, and this TL is no different. And yes, I've read his autobiography, and it's an amazing read. :)

BTW, the Hogan-Warrior match was at WrestleMania VI, not V (that was Hogan-Savage, a good match in its own right)...

An unfortunate typo that I've now fixed. Thanks for noticing.

And Rick Martel took time off to care for his wife in 1988, not 1987, IIRC (I think Rick Martel had the capability of being a good wrestler; put him up against Bret in their primes and that'd be a four-star match). God, that sounds like a bad disease his wife had; at least she got better...

He gets time off to do it a little earlier ITTL, due to butterflies and some knock-on effects of Steamboat's time off with his family after Richie's birth.

Finally, it has updated and it did not fail to deliver. Time to get off my butt and get my own continued.

Thanks! And I look forward to seeing yours when and if you continue it.

This was an amazing update. Can't wait to see the next one!

Thank you!

Hmmmm... wonder why he had to specify that (about Donald Trump)...

Even though I've stated Trump doesn't become President ITTL, that doesn't mean he won't find some way to stay newsworthy.

Not sure if Hogan will still be around in this ATL by the time the Undertaker appears, though would like to have Hogan get a clean win or few over the Undertaker (not necessarily in a title match).

Hogan will return fairly soon, and I do have plans for the Undertaker ITTL. Keep reading!
 
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Yo, Walkman! Long time lurker and first time poster here! As someone who mostly follows wrestling from a distance, I have to say that this story of yours scratches an itch in my being that time spent trying to play simulators like Total Extreme Wrestling just don't. It's great to see you still working on this piece after five years on the trail and with no end-point yet in sight. I hate when authors of fiction I like tend to get slower with the updates, but I can also relate as a struggling writer myself. Life and other such obstacles seem to appear more frequently the farther you are from port, and it takes a steady hand to keep the ship on course, so I'm happy you're keeping at it, what with everything you allude to. :D

Some things I wanted to ask, not necessarily related to wrestling but to how it could affect pop culture: considering Jim Hellwig's name change in NWA, it makes me wonder about the naming fate of a certain web-slinger's nemesis who'll be making his debut proper in the next couple of volumes of AS-M ITTL. Granted, I also don't know how popular Hellwig has managed to become in the different promotion, or if he's got upper-card status prepared for him in the coming months.

And regarding good Mr. Calloway, I wonder if your plans still involve him going to Jerry Lawler at first, now that WCW is a completely separate entity from OTL. It also makes me wonder whether or not The Master of Pain gimmick is still going to be a thing, now that there's a triumvirate in charge and not just the King himself... ;)
 
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