"So, how did the Ottoman Empire choose to convert to Catholicism? Well, it all started with a simple game of chess and a cup of tea..."
A historian explaining how Ottoman sultan Ahmed IX decided to convert to Catholicism. Actually, it was a much more complex affair than what the quote above hints, but it all began after a meeting with French king Gerard III (a meeting in which the two monarchs played chess and drank traditional Ottoman marijuana tea). The sultan's conversion was met with a little controversy at first by the imams, but later started a massive chain of conversions among his Turkish and middle eastern subjects, who had grown tired of the muslim clergy and laws.
"I get it, she's our national icon. But...well, let's just say that joining the army is not the first thing that comes to my mind when I hear 'Auntie Sam wants you'".