Or asking girls to go watch mopeds with you, "wo'j brommers kiek'n?"
Taking her out of the main party so you can have some alone time to make out
8mm to the Left: If Hitler Died in 1923
- Thread starter KaiserKatze
- Start date
Is anyone present well-versed on Czechoslovak, especially Slovak history? Without the Nazis, a lot of the grievances of the Slovak half would remain, since I don't think the Czechs would be compelled to alleviate the minority issues while it could risk problems with the Sudetengermans. But without Nazi backing, could Tiso and his ilk ever pose a proper threat? And how was general Slovak opinion on the Prague government?
Well, you can ask @Petike as they're from Slovakia for input on how Slovakia would develop sans Nazi Germany.
It's hard to say. Absent the EU and modern Europe in general they're stuck with each other (both states are a bit to small to be viable completely on their own without being plugged into a supernational entity). Without the Nazis you'd still see the issues between the two (namely that the Czech's have way more influence than the Slovaks and the latter were getting annoyed about it) and you also still have three million Germans who not only aren't reconciled but really aren't wanted by Prague.
I think you'd still see conflict but more on a diplomatic and political level rather than outright violence.
Also the Czech's make very nice guns and being surrounded on three sides (once the inevitable happens) will end up under heavy German influence. Perhaps LV can offer to mediate in exchange for strict guarantees about Czech sovereignty and a deal to buy as many guns and tanks as Skoda can make (at a good price)?
Even Tiso himself was doubtful of Slovakia's viability as a whole, and generally all but the most extreme saw a federated Czecho-Slovakia as the ideal, rather than full secession. However, there was an offer to become an autonomous region under Hungary, which Hungary refused to accept.
The issue is also that the Czechs ceding anything will be blood in the water. If they continue on as they are, they will continue to pass off minorities. If they give one group autonomy, all will want it. If they give a bit of territory away, by hook or by crook, it will be 0.1 seconds before all the other claimaints come knocking.
Hungarians not piss off ethnic minorities by denying them autonomy for 5 minutes challenge (impossible).
Jerez, almost like people want to speak their own language and practice their culture. Funny how that works,
Nonsense; who wouldn't want to be a Magyar, since that's clearly the best culture ever? /s
What's the flag of the Rhenish Free State?
I'm guessing it's something like this, though the flag in the background could be replaced by the German (either republican or imperial) tricolors.
I'm guessing it's something like this, though the flag in the background could be replaced by the German (either republican or imperial) tricolors.
Well it won't have the red, the red in the modern North Rhine Westphalian flag comes from the Westphalia part which here won't be added to the Rhineland. The traditional Rhenish flag is green over white.
As for the crest, I haven't fully decided yet. On the one hand, just using the symbol of the Rhineland alone is the most neutral, but on the other, I like the combo element which IRL flags like the Rheinland-Palatinate have. In that case I'd have to pick which ones to add. For example, the Duchies of Berg, of Kleve, and of Jülich would all be good choices for thr crest, as would Trier, the Palatinate, and of course the city of Cologne itself. But there isn't space for that many, which is why maybe just the Rhine River crest is beter
Leave out the Prussian Freestate eagle. They're the one they want to get rid of in the first place
It said a lot about the horrors in the Congo Free State that there was an international campaign in response to the atrocities under King Leopold II.
19 - Trial of the Spheres
8mm to the Left: A World Without Hitler
"Since the Roman Empire has perhaps no other civilisation had such a profound and benevolent effect on the development of the human race as the British Empire. Beginning as an island nation off the coast of Europe and rising to become an empire spanning the seven continents, the footprint of Britain is an indelible mark upon the world. It was through her proactiveness that the light of civilization permeated the dark, savage wilds of Africa and Asia, her greater ideals which set the foundations for the United States, and her drive for progress which inspired the disparate peoples of Europe to seek peace and betterment. Britain is not just the ruler of the waves, but represents the pinnacle of human achievement and development. Why, then, should we reduce ourselves to becoming anything less than the leader and greatest of powers which we are, much less in favour of those who owe us everything?” - Excerpt from the highly controversial “On the Question of the Commonwealth” submitted by Winston Churchill to ‘The Times’ in 1940
Trial of the Spheres
The death of King George V of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland on January 20th, 1936 could not have come at a less-auspicious time, and cast a pall over the nation which overshadowed even the Italian war in Africa. Flags had been lowered in mourning and the angry protesters once filling the street outside of the Italian Embassy had returned home to pay their respects for the beloved and fallen monarch. Daily radio broadcasts detailed at great length the deceased king’s achievements, both personal and national, with great emphasis placed upon his support in expanding the British Empire and his participation in the Great War against the menace of the Central European Powers. Certain topics were artfully avoided, such as his close familial relation to those same Central Powers or his tenure overlooking the loss of most of Ireland, but even when taking those hiccups into account, his reign would be remembered as a time of great stability and prosperity within Britain and her overseas empire.
With the death of the king, the throne passed to his eldest son and heir, Edward, soon to be known as King Edward VIII. This accession was not merely tainted by the shadow of the times and the growing tension in Europe and the world, but by the character and habits of the new king.
His Majesty, Edward the Eighth, by the Grace of God, of Great Britain, Ireland, and of the British Dominions beyond the Seas, King, Defender of the Faith, Emperor of India.
(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edwar..._The_Prince_of_Wales_No_4_(HS85-10-36416).jpg)
Edward was a diametric contradiction to his father, the former king, in nearly every way imaginable. Outspoken to his father’s demureness, flirtatious to George’s doting monogamy, and, most troubling to the men of the British Parliament, politically outspoken where his predecessor had respected the royal family’s policy of non-interference. Edward’s coronation made many fear an attempt to restore greater powers to the monarch, a fear which was not helped by his tremendous popularity. As one of the most visible and adored men in the English-speaking world, Edward commanded tremendous respect from all levels of society. His fashion tastes were plastered from London to San Francisco; his service on the Western Front earned him the love of veterans; his handsome features and suave demeanour drew the gaze of any eligible women who crossed his path.
It was this appreciation for the fairer sex which had often brought Edward into conflict with his father. Starting from his coronation as the Prince of Wales at the age of 17, Edward would become embroiled in numerous affairs with women from all types and backgrounds, from French courtesans to married English noblewomen. The Royal Family would put great effort and no small amount of funding into the task of keeping him on the straight and narrow and, more importantly, preserving his reputation. King George often despaired at his son’s womanising nature and unwillingness to settle down, and near the end of his life began to openly hope for Edward to not sire children so that the crown might pass to George’s second son, Albert, and through him to George’s granddaughter, Elizabeth.
Prime Minister Stanley Baldwin had shared the now-deceased king’s frustrations with their future ruler, and had done so even during his tenure as Prince of Wales. In particular, the two butted heads over Edward’s latest and most intense relationship, that being one Mrs. Wallis Simpson. Simpson was a twice-married American socialite with whom Edward had begun engaging in an affair and whom, it was becoming increasingly apparent, he intended to marry. Not only did Wallis’s abrasive and domineering nature cause friction with the reserved temperament of the British court, it also flew in the face of Edward’s role as the Supreme Governor of the Church of England, with whom he was required to be in communion as King. As the Church of England only permitted divorce on the grounds of adultery or death of a spouse, neither of which had been provided as a reason for Wallis’s first divorce and were not being considered for the second, there was a risk of her first being considered invalid by the Church and her second therefore bigamous. Regardless of whether or not the Church would rule in her favour, the scrutiny and messiness surrounding her made Parliament supremely uncomfortable with the idea of her ascending to the position of Queen.
More egregious than his romantic preferences, however, were King Edward’s political ones. For centuries, the British crown had been required to work in tandem with Parliament, with the balance tilting slowly towards a more democratic system until the reign of George V, when the power of Parliament stood near-uncontested and the king occupied a role little more than a figurehead. Within this system, it was expected that the king would make no statements on national policy, and until now, this convention had been respected. Not only did Edward flagrantly ignore precedent, he also cared little for his role, ignoring important documents and spending much of his time off with his mistress.
These factors, when taken alongside the League of Nations dispute over Abyssinia, make the reason for the somewhat distracted nature of Britain in early 1936 abundantly clear. The empire upon which the sun never set was feeling its overstretched nature, and where gaps were seen, it did not take long for interested competitors to slither their way in.
A silver fork plunged into the juicy cut of steak, tearing through the meat and skewering the asparagus beneath it. Ambassador Friedrich von Keller lifted the morsel to his mouth, his napkin following suit to catch the droplet of sauce which caught at the edge of his lips. The motions were automatic, ingrained over a lifetime of upper-class education and refinement, and he followed them with a sip of £2,000 wine. “Marvellous,” he declared in fluent Spanish once he had chewed and swallowed. “Simply exquisite.”
Across the table from him, Carlos Saavedra Lamas, head of the Argentinian Ministry of International Trade, smiled, visibly pleased with the reaction. “I know that if it is a German saying this to me, it must be true,” Saavedra Lamas stated with a smile. “Your standards for food are high, I am aware.”
“I daresay that I couldn’t think of a single restaurant in Munich which could top what I just tasted,” the German commented, pausing to take his final bite of the meat before setting down his utensils. “My belly is full, but my palate yearns for more.” He grasped his wineglass and took another drink. “The wine pairs excellently. Where is it from?”
“Near Mendoza.”
“Incredible. Truly. I am bereft of adjectives to express my enjoyment of this meal.”
Saavedra Lamas quirked an eyebrow. “Have you not gotten the chance to experience local cuisine in your years living here?”
“Yes, well…” Von Keller coughed, appearing a bit embarrassed. “My wife insisted on hiring French staff, and a good bloody steak is a rarity on my plate.”
“Ah, I see. Well, a happy wife begets a happy life, no?”
“Well-said!” The German laughed. “I will have to bring her a bottle of this, though it will be an effort to convince her to try it.”
Saavedra Lamas gestured widely to the remaining two bottles set down on the adjacent pouring stand. “Take both of these as a gift from me.”
Knowing the price of just one, von Keller shook his head. “I would not dream of it!”
“I insist! Tell your lovely wife that it is a gift from the people of Argentina to thank her for allowing us the use of her husband.”
“Well.” Von Keller flushed slightly, though if it was due to the wine or the compliment, he could not say. Likely some combination. “I suppose if you insist…”
“I do,” Saavedra Lamas said firmly but kindly. “And you would not risk insulting me by declining, no?”
Von Keller laughed once more and said, “I suppose when you phrase it so, I have no choice.”
His host rang a little bell and a servant entered. A series of quick instructions in Spanish and the bottles were whisked away to be packaged safely for travel back to von Keller’s estate.
Von Keller shook his head in wonderment. “I have been a guest in the royal halls of Belgrade and Brussels, but I must confess that you have impressed me far more than either king has done.”
Saavedra Lamas’s lips curled at the edges at that. “You flatter me.”
“And you, I.”
The two continued on in conversation for the next half-hour, beginning with family matters before gradually diverging into discussions on the state of world affairs. Von Keller expressed admiration for Saavedra Lamas’s famed role as a peacekeeper in South America and his aid in mediating peace between Paraguay and Bolivia in 1935, while Saavedra Lamas shared his own love of German culture and his desire to see Germany restored to her place as a leader among world powers. Eventually, though, as the sun began to set and pipes were filled with tobacco, discussions turned to the true point of their meeting.
“You must understand that investment is not our highest priority at this point in time,” Saavedra Lamas clarified, folding his hands in front of him. “The problem is not the flow of funds; rather, it is our economic and trade independence. With the British market now partially walled-off for our vendors, we have been put into a… difficult position. We are producing a significant amount of goods which we cannot sell, especially foodstuffs. What we need is a market.”
Von Keller made a noise of realisation. “The steak and wine make more sense now.”
Saavedra Lamas shrugged gently. “It was the best presentation I could think of. I hope it does not appear underhanded.”
“I would have thought of nothing different.” Von Keller removed the tip of his pipe from his mouth and pointed it at the other man. “I need to first clarify that I am not qualified to make such a trade deal, you understand.”
“Naturally. Merely your help in pleading our case would do wonders.”
“What precisely is your government’s proposition?”
“It is like this. Argentina needs an export market for our food. Formerly, Britain served this role, but for the last few years our exports have dropped thanks to Imperial Preference. The Americans are purchasing, but not enough. Another Great Power being interested in us would help a great deal.”
“Helping by buying?”
“Buying and re-selling.”
Von Keller tilted his head. “Why re-selling?”
“Awareness. The more people eating our food, the more customers we can build for it. Don’t think that we don’t see the trade and investment market that Germany has been building up around itself. We aren’t looking to fully join it, at least not yet, but we want our foot in the door early.”
Von Keller nodded in recognition. “What can you offer in return? You must understand that German farmers have priority.”
“Of course, and that is why a broader European market is in our interest. Previous leaders have shackled us too tightly to Britain, but for Argentina to become for South America what Germany is for Europe, we cannot stay that course. We are prepared to grant German resale permission of Argentinian goods—only through licensed sellers, of course—for a period of five years, followed by another five years of special dispensation on prices. In exchange, we would like a guaranteed purchase rate for those same first five years.”
“What purchase rate would that be?”
“400,000 tonnes.”
Von Keller gripped the edge of the table. “That is… a very substantial sum.”
“I am aware.”
“I will have to discuss this with the Reich Ministry for the Economy. A deal of the likes of your proposal is not made lightly, and could have serious ramifications for our economy and workers.”
“Understandable.” Saavedra Lamas lifted his folded hands to his lips. “Argentina has a very significant German community, and continued cooperation is something that our government is deeply interested in. Think of it this way: Money spent on Argentinian goods would not solely be for the benefit of a foreign power, but for your own brothers and sisters overseas. What’s more, it could be the beginning of a permanent foothold in the region. Argentinian shores would provide a useful stopping point during a navigation to Antarctica, would it not?”
A questioning eyebrow-raise was his prompt to continue.
“There remain several portions of the great southern continent which remain unclaimed or, if claimed, poorly-defended. Ripe for German expansion.”
“You would propose a desert of ice and snow as compensation for German currency? Would you be the one so bold as to propose this before the Reichstag?”
“It is just an idea,” Saavedra Lamas said, holding out hands in a pacifying gesture. “Merely to show that we are flexible, and willing to do what we can to make this idea work.”
Von Keller rubbed his jaw. “I will have to discuss this,” he repeated finally. “Perhaps an agreement can be reached, though I would not hold your breath on the 400,000 you desire.” He shook his head in disbelief, muttering the word “Antarctica” under his breath.
“For whatever you can do, I, and the people of Argentina, will be forever grateful.”
Rays of sunlight filtered through the faintly warped glass of von Lettow-Vorbeck’s study window like drops of golden rain. They caught on the stray dust motes swirling in the air, splintering and spreading out to fill the entire room with the warm glow of Summer. No loud noises or distraction were present to distract the man in question from his task, only the soft scratching of a pen on paper disturbing the tranquillity.
The paper in question was the latest page in the small brown journal into which the German President inscribed the majority of his thoughts and ideas. It served as both an outlet for his increasingly-stressful life as well as a chronicle of the plans he had made. It was risky, he knew, to commit the inner workings of his mind to the written word, especially when many of the plans he conceived of could be considered little more than traitorous, but he was only a man and allowed himself this weakness. Caution was not wholly thrown to the wind, however, and he satiated the nagging voice of worry by writing in Swahili, a language that only a handful in the entirety of Germany would even recognise, let alone be able to read.
The train of thought on which he was currently focused was the state of Germany’s international prestige and power. It was undeniable that the Reich had fallen far since 1914, and where one her presence could be felt on every continent from the Americas to Asia, now her wings had been clipped and she struggled to make ripples even within Europe herself. The chains of Versailles had been loosened, but not wholly removed. That would change one day, of that the man was positive, but until that time came…
Adenauer would be a problem. Von Lettow-Vorbeck paused in his scribbling to consider, before striking out the last line he wrote. Yes, Adenauer would definitely be a problem. The man had all sorts of ideas about Germany’s place in a grander European System, ones which von Lettow-Vorbeck could respect but with which he could not agree. Adenauer wished for harmony and co-operation with the forces of the West; a noble idea, but one which was wholly incompatible with Germany’s own potential for greatness. Once upon a time, the armies of the German Empire had taken on four Great Powers at once and nearly triumphed. Many had forgotten this fact, but he had not, and he was sure that neither London nor Paris had, either. They feared Germany, as they were right to, and as difficult as that fear had made his job, it also provided opportunities.
Yugoslavia, he wrote, and then in a triangle encircling it, Greece and then Bulgaria and Hungary. He considered the names for a moment before drawing a circle around Yugoslavia.
The Balkans were important, hadn’t even Bismarck predicted the war which would burst from that region’s wild loins? And now the stage was being set again, with the lynchpin of all of it being the Kingdom of Yugoslavia itself. Nearly all of their neighbours desired a piece of them; all it would take would be a hard enough push and the fragile seams would tear it apart from within. But was that really the most desirable option?
Albanian -> Investment? was a note written on a previous day and he eyed it contemplatively. He had previously dismissed the idea, seeing little to gain by funnelling German funding into a tiny, backwater nation thoroughly entrenched in Italy’s sphere, but he found himself reconsidering it. Previous forays into the region in order to win support for rearmament had not brought back any exceptional dividends, but neither had it been an abysmal failure. Perhaps even more important than money, though, was what Albania represented to Italy, and the anger and frustration it would inspire in Mussolini should the Germans pull it from his orbit, as he had done when he stopped Austro-German union.
He tapped his chin with the end of the pen for several seconds, then drew a line between Albania and Yugoslavia. There was potential there. Germany was already one of the leading trade partners for the Yugoslavs, and with Italy distracted in the Horn of Africa, they would be devoid of the extra funds needed to counter new German purchasing power in Albania. If both nations could be brought into Germany’s sphere of influence, not only would it put greater pressure on Italy, but their proximity to Greece would exert pressure on the fragile Mediterranean nation to follow suit. It was almost perfect, the one small hiccup being Bulgaria and their claims on Yugoslavian Macedonia.
Albania-Macedonia trade? He thought it over before shaking his head. Macedonian buyout? This time he’d barely finished writing it before striking it through. Limited war? Also scribbled out.
With a huff, von Lettow-Vorbeck sat back in his chair. It really was a frustrating mess of a situation. Germany’s relationship to Bulgaria was quite positive, hinging not only on their historically-good relations, but on Bulgaria’s staunch opposition to Communism and valuable geographical position in the event of war in the East. Despite this, their desires were frustratingly difficult to accommodate for, putting them at odds with all of their neighbours, many of whom shared equal potential as allies. He could abandon them, but doing so would be driving them into the arms of Mussolini.
Any disputes with the Lowlands had largely been resolved in German favour, only Belgium dragging their feet on building proper ties with the Reich, but von Lettow-Vorbeck lost no sleep on a nation which he found to be irrelevant to any future plans. With the exception of Norway, the Scandinavians leaned heavily towards the German camp. Finland and the Baltics had no real choice other than orienting themselves with Germany; Lithuania might become a problem with the dispute over the Memel territory, but when played against Poland’s occupation of their capital, Vilnius, he did not foresee it proving to be an issue. France was hostile but had neutered themselves with excess reliance on their precious Maginot. No, Germany’s biggest issues lay to the East and South, and the unlikely, but dangerous possibility of Berlin’s enemies teaming up to remove the threat on their borders once and for all. Even with the rapidly-growing military and domestic police force, Germany would have no chance against a combined Polish-Czech-Italian attack.
The situation was made no more helpful when he cast his eyes beyond Europe. British and American influence dominated the New World, and while friendly relations were maintained, it would be folly to expect any to throw off the mantle of Anglo-America in exchange for Germany, especially when her own influence struggled to escape the boundaries of Europe. In the East, Japan ruled over most of Germany’s former Pacific colonies, unwilling to hand them over.
China. He wrote it down. He had been contacted numerous times by Hans von Seeckt, head of a military mission to China. The man insisted that the nation was ripe for German alignment and that Beijing could play a crucial role in German plans for the future. Von Lettow-Vorbeck was sceptical, but he had little to lose and no better ideas, so jotted a note to himself and slipped it into a pocket for later. Perhaps he could learn more about what China could offer the Reich.
Sighing, the ex-general rose to his feet and stretched. It had not been the most productive brainstorming session, but ideas were swimming which may one day be of use. A lack of proper planning was a death sentence, and if he were to see Germany’s lands restored and expanded, he would have to be methodical and precise, or he would risk undoing all he had worked to build.
@KaiserKatze ! amazing chapter! Hope that Edward stays on the throne! would make for a rather interesting british Empire!
Considering he still falls for Wallis, I'm not so sure about that, TBH.