A World Of Laughter, A World Of Tears

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HOFFA ARRESTED ON BRIBERY CHARGES

WASHINGTON, D.C.– Union Leader James Hoffa was arrested by agents of the Federal Bureau of Investigation yesterday on charges of bribery....

...Speaking for his client, Attorney Raymond Seale stated "This is obviously a politically motivated arrest on the part of an anti-union administration. President Disney was well-known as a union-buster during his time in the private sector, and he is now using the powers of his office in a manner designed to cripple them once and for all."

-Chicago Tribune, 3/14/57


"Now, I won't speak as to the charges regarding Mr. Hoffa. I will say this, though: The President has been given every opportunity in the world to be a great leader. Some of his projects have even leaned towards greatness, such as the space program. However, when given the opportunity for moral leadership, he has consistently refused to rise to the occasion. We still have riots in our streets between underprivileged youths and the youngsters in the so-called "Disney Defenders". In the face of open and honest disapproval of his policies, he has shoved unconstitutional measures through congress, measures certain to not be upheld by the Supreme Court. And, yes, millions of American citizens down south are still denied their rights to vote, their rights to shop where they will, to attend school where they will, to drink from the same fountains and use the same facilities as those of lighter skin.

"In all of these matters and many more, the man who brought us some of the most delightful creations of animation has, quite oddly, suffered a total failure of imagination."

-Speech by Senator John F. Kennedy (D-MA) to the American Civil Liberties Union


"It is therefore the opinion of this court that Mr. Kunstler is mentally incapable of defending himself or assisting in his own defense, and will be remanded to the State Hospital for the Criminally Insane until such time as he has been determined to not be a danger to himself or others..."

-Judge Horace Wright, 3/27/57


Problems? Hoo, boy, I'll say we had problems. They had to put extra security on me after the Anti-Defamation League started calling me a traitor. They were comparing me to the Jews in Germany and Poland who sold out their neighbors for a little protection, calling me "Walt's pet Jew". See, I didn't see myself as Jewish. I'd even started going to the Episcopalian Church and getting religious instruction. It didn't matter. Because of my last name, they saw me as a turncoat.

On the other hand, I did have one of my better inspirations during this time, even if the eventual repercussions couldn't have been foreseen. See, at first Walt was mad because Kunstler had gotten off with his lawyers calling him crazy, paranoid, seeing a frame job where there wasn't one, which is a better defense than his first team gave him. The President would rant and rave about how being a communist didn't make someone crazy, it just made 'em idiots.

It hit me then: The President was wrong. Of course it was crazy to be a communist. Of course it was the sign of a mental defect. I mean, maybe not when you're poor and uneducated, but when you're a successful professional? It's like being a fashion designer who advocates nudism, or a cop who advocates crime. Communism was a mental illness, and Kunstler was in a hospital getting treated for it. Beautiful.

Of course I didn't bring any of this up to him immediately, but I did bide my time until he calmed down a bit. In the meantime, he was letting the pressures of the office get to him, and I needed to isolate him from the staff members who were causing distractions.

-Retired Senator Roy Cohn (D-NY), quoted in Magic Kingdom: America In The 50s, by Studs Terkel


The first change that I noticed was that Cohn was always there. Morning briefings, staff meetings, walking through the halls, he never gave the President a moment alone. He'd even speak up during the times that I asked President Disney a direct question, like the man couldn't speak for himself

During one such meeting, I brought up a simple question regarding the space program. We were slated to send a man into space for a short hop, and I wanted to know if the President had any specific words to say on such an occasion. Instead of answering me directly, he looked at Roy.

"Make up something and the President will sign his name" Roy said.

"I thought..." I managed to get out before he interrupted.

"Next item" he snapped.

I went through the remainder of the morning meeting, a bit taken aback by the President's uncharacteristic lack of communication with me. As I said goodbye, I leaned forward slightly as I arose from my chair. The answer came to me then and there as I caught the scent of whiskey on the President's breath.

Cohn had already managed to manipulate one drunken politician. Now he was pulling the strings of the most powerful one in the world. I was aghast at the prospect. Disney had been a father figure to me for some years, as I'm sure I've established by now.

I was able to get him alone just once, when the President graciously invited me over to the private residence to watch Julie Andrews in Cinderella on television one night. I tried to talk with him then, but he just smiled at me blankly, said "Jimmy, my boy, can't you ever think of anything but business?" and sat enraptured by Miss Andrews' performance for the rest of the evening.

-From The Truth Of Fantasy: A Washington Memoir by Former White House Press Secretary James Dodd


Dear Sir:

It has come to the attention of Mickey Mouse Clubs nationwide that you are planning to export a book to the United States called Heulen, by the so-called "poet" Alan Ginsberg.

Having been informed of the contents of this book, we are sworn and determined to not allow this degenerate and obscene material to touch the hallowed shores of our great country. Ginsberg and his cronies have left the United States to spread their filth elsewhere, and quite frankly, we are happy that they left.

We therefore ask you to reconsider your intent to sell this book in the United States, as you will be met with every legal means at our disposal to stop you.

Sincerely,

Anita Bryant
Youth Morals Director
Mickey Mouse Clubs of America
 
Hell, it worked out for the Soviets, since they could always point to the free and fair elections in Hungary to prove that they were all for these things. Never mind Poland, or Yugoslavia, or Romania, all still under their thumb....

But at least we got the Army out, even if they were still right on the border. That's probably the proudest moment of the administration.

-Retired Senator Roy Cohn (R-NY), quoted in Magic Kingdom: America In The 50s by Studs Terkel

Oh my God!

How can you write a ATL and be so uninformed. Tito (and Yugoslavia with him) never listened to Stalin too much, and send him to hell and told to him fuck off in 1948. In 1948-1953 (and couple years afterward) Tito's Yugoslavia was so far outside of Soviet Sphere of influence that it looked like a dot. Even after normalization of relations in late 1950'es it was just light ecconomic cooperation and nothing more. Both in 1956. and 1968. Yugoslavia supported Hungary and Chekoslovakia as much as it safely could. Those two actualy wanted to be as "free" as Yugo was. Yugoslavia was communist, but pretty much neutral, it freaking founded the entire Non Aligned Movenment with Naser and Nehru. Ann while some idological reaproachment happend when Tito in his last years personaly was reverting to more "hard core" communism... well the rest of leadership and entire country wernt any more listening that much.

From late '60es and onwards you had significant personal economic liberties and rights, could travel to Evil Decadent Capitalist countries with very little fus... And even in '80es when ecconomy started dying from mismanagement and murderous IMF debt repayment schemes country was far closer to a consumer market ecconomy and society than any comunist country anywhere, ever. OK, 21st century China not counting.
 

maverick

Banned
It hit me then: The President was wrong. Of course it was crazy to be a communist. Of course it was the sign of a mental defect. I mean, maybe not when you're poor and uneducated, but when you're a successful professional? It's like being a fashion designer who advocates nudism, or a cop who advocates crime. Communism was a mental illness, and Kunstler was in a hospital getting treated for it. Beautiful.

Lovely...reminds me of Futurama, with one judge filling the psychiatric institutions after declaring that being poor was a mental illness:p
 

maverick

Banned
I can't tell if the socialist newb was being serious or not, but he has a point, yugoslavia was far from being under Socialist control...

Of course, this is part of

Retired Senator Roy Cohn (R-NY), quoted in Magic Kingdom: America In The 50s by Studs Terkel

So, we can say that since this guy is the one being quoted, he made the mistake and not the author of the TL...that's what we call an unreliable narrator, newbie
 
Oh my God!

How can you write a ATL and be so uninformed. Tito (and Yugoslavia with him) never listened to Stalin too much, and send him to hell and told to him fuck off in 1948. In 1948-1953 (and couple years afterward) Tito's Yugoslavia was so far outside of Soviet Sphere of influence that it looked like a dot. Even after normalization of relations in late 1950'es it was just light ecconomic cooperation and nothing more. Both in 1956. and 1968. Yugoslavia supported Hungary and Chekoslovakia as much as it safely could. Those two actualy wanted to be as "free" as Yugo was. Yugoslavia was communist, but pretty much neutral, it freaking founded the entire Non Aligned Movenment with Naser and Nehru. Ann while some idological reaproachment happend when Tito in his last years personaly was reverting to more "hard core" communism... well the rest of leadership and entire country wernt any more listening that much.

From late '60es and onwards you had significant personal economic liberties and rights, could travel to Evil Decadent Capitalist countries with very little fus... And even in '80es when ecconomy started dying from mismanagement and murderous IMF debt repayment schemes country was far closer to a consumer market ecconomy and society than any comunist country anywhere, ever. OK, 21st century China not counting.


One hint when reading this specific timeline: Check the source of the information, and consider how he or she would see the situation. To Cohn, communism is communism is communism, and it can all be traced back to the Kremlin.
 
I can't tell if the socialist newb was being serious or not, but he has a point, yugoslavia was far from being under Socialist control...

Of course, this is part of



So, we can say that since this guy is the one being quoted, he made the mistake and not the author of the TL...that's what we call an unreliable narrator, newbie

I love simultaneous posting, especially when we say essentially the same thing.
 

maverick

Banned
Indeed...

Now, seriously...

While the Johnson/Kennedy was predictable (that's what you get after three years dedicated to history and alt-history, you've seen it all...and then you get President Disney and President H-P Lovecraft and the such)...I will say that this is by far the most original dystopia set in the USA...

I will say the disney armbands might have been a tad too much...:p

Now, Socialist in Psychiatric institutions, anti-riot legislation, cartoon inspired youth movements that an actually hold political power and enforce censorship without much doubts about their constitutionality...well, the effort is really shown and appreciated
 
Indeed...

Now, seriously...

While the Johnson/Kennedy was predictable (that's what you get after three years dedicated to history and alt-history, you've seen it all...and then you get President Disney and President H-P Lovecraft and the such)...I will say that this is by far the most original dystopia set in the USA...

I will say the disney armbands might have been a tad too much...:p

Now, Socialist in Psychiatric institutions, anti-riot legislation, cartoon inspired youth movements that an actually hold political power and enforce censorship without much doubts about their constitutionality...well, the effort is really shown and appreciated

Should have stick to the Mickey Mouse ear as fascist symbol
 
One hint when reading this specific timeline: Check the source of the information, and consider how he or she would see the situation. To Cohn, communism is communism is communism, and it can all be traced back to the Kremlin.


Ah sorry then, haven't payed attention that it was Cohn signed under that and the implications on that...
 
Great last updates...Having Cohn taking the driver's seat while Walt becomes a Drunk is fantastic. We will be in for quite a ride during the late 1950's:D
 
Wally, my pal, I am in London and it is hipsville here, though we seem to be at odds with a group of kiddos calling themselves "Teddy Boys", even though I can't see where or how or why we offended them. They all show up at concerts for Elvis and worship him like the golden calf or one of those Oriental idols Alan's always drooling over. But what is done is done, and as long as we stick to a couple of Jewish neighborhoods in the East End where we have some youngsters calling themselves "Mods" on our side, we're safe, nay, we're nearly idolized since they want to know all about our beat lifestyle and take bennies with us. So it's been rap session after rap session, though Alan keeps tugging at his beard and whining that the distinctly non-groovy mouse kiddies have ruined him, and it's downhill from there till we remind him that great artists are never appreciated in their own time then send him upstairs with a bottle of cheap muscatel and a young boy with green eyeshadow. Hope you got in touch with Jack and please let him know that he's sure to find a publisher for his magnum opus if he can just get someone to sit down with a giant roll of paper without wanting to wipe his ass with it first.

-Personal correspondence of "Beano" to Wally Hedrick


ANTI-AMERICAN RIOTS ERUPT IN TAIWAN

-London Times, 5/25/57


ISRAEL, USSR TO INCREASE TRADE, CULTURAL EXCHANGES

-Jerusalem Post, 5/27/57


The former governor stops and looks down, as if this most obvious of questions has taken him by surprise. "No," he says softly. "No, I do not believe that I will enter government service again at any point in my life. Quite frankly, having seen what they are capable of inside the Beltway, I am loath to ever approach politics again. Instead, I expect to remain in my law practice for the rest of my working life, and to occasionally fight for the rights of the oppressed when an interesting enough case crosses my desk."

-"Stevenson In Repose," Look Magazine, 5/57


"President Disney's attempt to build bridges with the Jewish community may have been dealt a fatal blow today during his speech to the Chamber of Commerce in Baltimore, Maryland yesterday afternoon. During his opening remarks, the President was interrupted by demonstrators in the back of the room who loudly protested his support for Egyptian leader Nasser. Sources have informed this reporter that as the protesters were removed by security personnel, the President could be heard leaning over and saying in a joking manner to Chamber President Clancy Johnson 'Tell your security men to watch their wallets on the way out.'

"The White House has not confirmed or denied the President's comments, but a highly placed administration official who spoke on condition of anonymity stated 'If the President said that, it obviously had nothing to do with the religion or heritage of the protesters, but was rather an expression of concern for the well-being of the security guards.'

"In response to this alleged incident, the Anti-Defamation League has issued an official protest with the White House."

-Reporter Tyrone Lansing, WBAL Baltimore


"It was a lovely time to be alive. You had Elvis coming to Liverpool, and that was all that we needed to go stark raving mad. Think I put so much grease in my hair that I could have stood on my head and slid all the way to the Cavern Club to see him. Don't know how they managed to book the man, since he was the hottest ticket in England, no, in Europe. So I showed up with stars in my eyes and lust for the birds in my heart, but instead of making time with one of them, who should I meet but a young incorrigible named Paul. He refused to leave me alone when he found out that I played guitar, though to be fair, he says that I refused once I found out that he played guitar. It's all a bit murky, truth be told. But that's how we met up, as Elvis sang "Jailhouse Rock" on the stage above and the girls around us in the balcony screamed their lovely little lungs out."

-Musician John Lennon quoted in "Mods, Rockers, and Those Bloody Beatniks". Major Music Magazine, 12/10/94


"And now, here's Pat Boone with 'Kiss Me Again', the number one song on our charts!"

-Dick Clark, American Bandstand premiere


GOVERNOR FAUBUS PROMISES TO CALL UP NATIONAL GUARD TO PREVENT INTEGRATION

-Arkansas Democrat Gazette
, 8/30/57


"Please note that the President is very concerned about the developing situation in Little Rock, and wishes to find a way to resolve the issues involved within the rule of law while maintaining a respect for the unique traditions and culture of the South."

-White House Spokesman James Dodd, 9/1/57


There was no way around it. If we weren't going to look like fools, then we had to go up against Faubus in the courts. Hey, I'm all about states' rights, but the Civil War determined that you don't get to pick and choose the federal laws you follow. At least not if you're a governor.

-Retired Senator Roy Cohn (R-NY), quoted in Magic Kingdom: America In The 50s by Studs Terkel


Please note that while the Mickey Mouse Clubs take no specific position regarding the issue of integration, we are mindful that various members in certain regions have strong opinions on the matter. Therefore, we only ask that when exercising your right to free speech that you refrain from any clothing, action, or comment that would cause bystanders to believe that you are speaking on behalf of our organization.

-Memo to Mickey Mouse Clubs of Little Rock, AK from Head Office in Burbank, CA


GOVERNOR WITHDRAWS NATIONAL GUARD, NEGRO STUDENTS FORCED FROM BUILDING

-New York Times, 9/21/57


"Yes, we have received a request from the Mayor of Little Rock to provide federal troops for crowd control. The President has considered this request at great length. Unfortunately, while he sympathizes with Mayor Mann in this matter, President Disney also believes that the military has no place in enforcing laws within our borders. It is the position of this administration that the people of Little Rock will be best served by their local law enforcement officers. President Disney will keep a close eye on this developing situation, however, and act as it becomes appropriate.

[Question not comprehensible]

"Yes, he is aware that General Eisenhower has recommended federalizing the Arkansas National Guard. President Disney is mindful of the increased strain on the General due to his recent stroke, however, and understands that the constitutionality of such a move would be uncertain at best."

-White House Press Secretary James Dodd, 9/22/57


"It didn't seem to be that big a deal at the time. They were Negroes, though we didn't use that word, oh, no. We figured that they had no place among decent white folk. Didn't see why in the world they'd even want to be in one of our schools, or stray so far from their own. Didn't understand that "Separate but equal" is anything but equal. So we went down to join the crowd, but took off our uniforms and hats first, dressed like regular old students.

"We were at the back of the school, since they'd managed to sneak 'em in that door previously. Then a whisper went up, then a murmur, like the whole crowd was saying 'They're coming in the side!'. So we all surged around the building. I wasn't thinking at the time, none of us were, we were all just caught up in the excitement of protecting our state, or the virtue of white southern womanhood, or some kind of nonsense like that. Hell, for me it was probably just a day off from school, more or less.

"Somehow or another I got pushed around enough to be near the front, and got to see what happened next. First off was a ring of scared-looking local police, yelling at the crowd and telling them to stay back. Southern white folk protecting the black man. Didn't enter my head at the time, though, since I was too busy watching what happened next. First off, the police line broke when some yokel yelled out 'Lynch the niggers!' and there was a huge surge in the crowd. Most of the kids made it to the door. One of them, Ernest I found out his name was later, he pushed the others ahead of him, protecting the younger ones and the women. Someone clocked him on the back of the head. Don't know what the man was thinking when he turned around and hit back. Guess it had just built up too much for him.

"I saw the crowd rip him apart. Literally. I mean, they pulled him on each side like taffy, and what was left after five minutes wasn't recognizable as human anymore. Couldn't even tell what race he was.

"That day changed everything for me. Changed it even more for him."

-William J. Clinton, co-founder of the Southern Poverty Law Center, quoted in Let Us Hold Our Banner High, Documentary Prize winner at the Cannes International Film Festival, 2002.


RACE RIOT IN LITTLE ROCK

-The New York Times, 9/26/57
 
"It was a lovely time to be alive. You had Elvis coming to Liverpool, and that was all that we needed to go stark raving mad. Think I put so much grease in my hair that I could have stood on my head and slid all the way to the Cavern Club to see him. Don't know how they managed to book the man, since he was the hottest ticket in England, no, in Europe. So I showed up with stars in my eyes and lust for the birds in my heart, but instead of making time with one of them, who should I meet but a young incorrigible named Paul. He refused to leave me alone when he found out that I played guitar, though to be fair, he says that I refused once I found out that he played guitar. It's all a bit murky, truth be told. But that's how we met up, as Elvis sang "Jailhouse Rock" on the stage above and the girls around us in the balcony screamed their lovely little lungs out."

-Musician John Lennon quoted in "Mods, Rockers, and Those Bloody Beatniks". Major Music Magazine, 12/10/94

For some reason I imagine a Elvis/Bealte band :D

but its cool nice to hear of Clinton
 
Thinking ahead a little bit, you previously mentioned the "mental hygiene act of the 1960s." Now, unless there was some previous POD that armwaved away the 22nd amendment, Ol' Walt can't run again in '60- and by the account of things, probably shouldn't. So who the hell becomes President in 1960 and enforces the Mental Hygiene Acts? Can't be Cohn- there surely would've been some mention of it by now. On the other hand, the Acts sound like they're his baby and brainchild, so whoever does get elected to office probably is just as manipulated by Cohn as Walt has been.

Who the hell could that person be?
 
Thinking ahead a little bit, you previously mentioned the "mental hygiene act of the 1960s." Now, unless there was some previous POD that armwaved away the 22nd amendment, Ol' Walt can't run again in '60- and by the account of things, probably shouldn't. So who the hell becomes President in 1960 and enforces the Mental Hygiene Acts? Can't be Cohn- there surely would've been some mention of it by now. On the other hand, the Acts sound like they're his baby and brainchild, so whoever does get elected to office probably is just as manipulated by Cohn as Walt has been.

Who the hell could that person be?

Stay tuned....
 
Dear lord, Disney's a decent entertainer, but a shitty Politition.

and Nice to hear Elvis and Lennon bit. I'm hoping we're gonna see a version of the Beatles, and Lennon's still alive in 1994? does that mean Paul's dead?
 

Hendryk

Banned
Of course it was crazy to be a communist. Of course it was the sign of a mental defect. I mean, maybe not when you're poor and uneducated, but when you're a successful professional? It's like being a fashion designer who advocates nudism, or a cop who advocates crime. Communism was a mental illness, and Kunstler was in a hospital getting treated for it.
There are still people in 2009 who seriously argue that liberalism is a mental defect--they regularly make that claim at WorldNetDaily. So it's certainly not far-fetched that someone as shady as Roy Cohn would push the idea in the 1950s.

Nice to hear Elvis and Lennon bit.
One thing I'm thinking about Elvis--without the need to tone himself down for the sake of American media, since he's persona non grata on American TV anyway, and without the manager he had in OTL, he may well show a more radical, hipster side of his music and his personality.

I'm hoping we're gonna see a version of the Beatles, and Lennon's still alive in 1994? does that mean Paul's dead?
Why would that have to be an either/or? It's not like John's death in OTL had anything to do with Paul.
 
Why would that have to be an either/or? It's not like John's death in OTL had anything to do with Paul.

I didn't mean that the two were connected, It should have been like this:

Lennon's alive in 94? that means he wasn't killed?

is there gonna be something poking fun at all the 'Paul's dead' BS?
 
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