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--- stories:technology_of_the_ah.com_series [2014/02/23 16:44] – Petike
+++ stories:technology_of_the_ah.com_series [2019/03/29 15:14] (current) – external edit 127.0.0.1
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-====== Technology of the AH.com Series ======
+====== Technology of AH.com The Series ======
-Although the Series is jokey and pseudoscientific, some consistencies of technology have been worked up over the years.
+Although the tech //**[[AH.com The Series]]**// is jokey and often pseudoscientific (given the comedic nature of the series), some consistencies of technology have been worked out over the years.
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 An integral part of the workings of the intertimeline ship AH.COM, little is known about how it works, but it can be found in many forms, such as Mike Collins' gauntlets, the powers of which are little documented.
-**Snarky Definition:** Commonly used as a mcguffin by the poorer writers who can't think of an original idea. (j/k)
+__Snarky Definition:__ Commonly used as a mcguffin by the poorer writers who can't think of an original idea. (j/k)
+==== Weaponry ====
+**MES Ship Armaments**\\
+The AH.com Ship and similar craft are primarily armed with particle beam weapons and missiles. The [[CF.net#CF.net Ship]] also has an unusually powerful 'main cannon'. The shuttles are inconsistently sometimes shown with weapons and sometimes without, but more commonly the latter.
+**Small Arms**\\
+The standard personal armament of the crew is the BFG (Big Effin' Gun), while simpler plasma rifles are also used, and sold by the CF.netters as a trade commodity. [[offtopic:Ward]] also used a plasma Gatling gun at one point. The exact nature of the plasma weapons depends on the writer of the episode - [[offtopic:Thande]]-penned episodes show discrete balls of golden plasma (inspired by the plasma weapons from the game //Total Annihilation//) whereas [[offtopic:MerryPrankster]]-penned ones rather suggest jets of white-hot flame, more like flamethowers. The episode CITATION NEEDED eventually clarified this by having Matt demonstrate the BFG to the PoleTrolls and say that it has multiple modes, capable of firing plasma shots, flamethrower blasts, bullets, arrows/darts, or ALL OF THEM AT ONCE.
+On the //[[ah.com ship|AH.com]]//, there is a dedicated armory that is run by [[offtopic:Weapon M]] and [[offtopic:Matt]], which holds a large assortment of conventional weaponry. Though in most episode the two characters are portrayed as carrying BFGs into any fight.
+**Exotic Weapons**\\
+Many crewmembers have unusual personal weapons - [[offtopic:Dave Howery]] has an adamantium chainsaw, [[offtopic:IronYuppie]] has an electrified Chinese yo-yo of death, and so forth.
+**Weapons of Other Factions**
+[[offtopic:Justin Pickard]]'s [[Hairplane]] was equipped with powerful technobabblyon particle weapons, trios of cannons that fire balls of green energy which drain power from whatever they hit. This technology was later reverse-engineered and used by his enemies [[The Germans]] on their [[offtopic:steffen|Kapitan Steffen]]. Technobabblyon energy can be somewhat counteracted by armouring the ship's key power systems with a mineral called Blue Schwaedshuess.
+Warhammer 40K-inspired bolters were also seen in the episodes featuring the //[[Vendetta]]//. The //Vendetta// and her sister ships use a variety of ship-to-ship weapons, primarily cannons which fire "energy shells".
+The [[offtopic:Mappist Cabal]]'s //[[Mercator]]// has been shown using powerful weapons that look like continuous green ribbons of energy, and are probably tapped straight from the Map Thread.
+Occasionally mentioned are the powerful superweapons A.S.S.H.A.T.s and **crosstime bombs**. The A.S.S.H.A.T. is a very powerful timed missile which is capable of destroying all life on a planet: defusing one formed the basis of the episode [[GIVE ME A TALL SHIP]]. Crosstime bombs (also called **ISOT warheads**) are essentially weapons which cause everything in their vicinity to be randomly exchanged with another timeline. They appeared in [[THE RETURN OF MIKE COLLINS AND MOLOBO]] and were mentioned in [[A PRESENT FROM THE FUTURE]].
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 ==== See Also ====
 **[[AH.com Enterprise - Technology and Devices]]**
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 ==== Navigation ====