CHAPTER 66
A STEEL OATH
Reverend-Colonel Sunday announces the Church's support for Steele's Presidency inside the Capitol Building, Philadelphia (March 2, 1914, colorized)
Joe Steele, wearing a Great American War era-style Union Blue officer's uniform, waved to thousands of admirers, all recently vaccinated from the Beckie Flu. He waved his cavalry hat, adorned with gold braid and a crossed-swords emblem, as he contemplated the future of the nation. His Colonel Ford convertible was making its way to the steps of Independence Hall for his official swearing-in as President-for-Life. All around, people writhed like mounds of cockroaches, desperately trying to get a view of their new supreme leader. The sun shone down from the bright blue cloudless sky but was almost blocked out by the innumerable flags and banners lining the streets, hung from windows, streetlights, and waving on poles as far the eye could see, held aloft and waved by his adoring followers. It was March 5, 1914, and the American Fundamentalist Church and its Reverend-Colonel had just put its weight behind Steele's rule, essentially making his rule undisputed. Steele smiled and blew a kiss to a little girl saluting on the side of the street. She was lucky, he thought, for she was about to get a front-row seat to the future of the world.
As the caravan of vehicles came to a halt in front of Independence Hall, the drums got louder and the bells pealed out all over the city. Not far away, the Liberty Bell was clanging up a storm. What had one day celebrated the overthrow of a tyrannical king now celebrated the coming of a tyrannical king. With the backing of the Church, and thanks to Sunday's previous cuckholding of the Council of Jehovah, Steele was now virtually unopposed. There were some ardent opponents left, such as the leftovers of Roosevelt's Bull Moose Movement, but his very public assassination had left little energy behind the movement. While the government listed his death as "an attack by insidious anarchists," most could connect the obvious dots and knew Steele had had him killed, and that was what Steele wanted. He knew it was obvious. He knew that almost anyone with half a brain would realize he was the only one who had the motive and the means to organize the hit. But he didn't care. He wanted to show people that, in Steele's America, treason would not go unpunished. The survival of the fittest was over, and the true Strong Man was made manifest to all in the form of the steely-eyed man now walking up the steps to Independence Hall.
Over all hung the haunting sounds of The President's Own, the best-trained military band in the world. As Steele entered the building a tenor was belting out "When Johnny Comes Marching Home," and the crowds were joining in. Some even held effigies of Teddy Roosevelt, mockingly adorned with a hole in his straw head, making the likenesses look like donuts with mustaches. One little boy held aloft a sign that read, in his own childish handwriting, "DEATH ALWAYS TO TRAITORS." Even inside the Hall, the sounds of the crowd made it almost impossible to even concentrate on anything. Security uneasily surveyed the area, anxious to get the ceremony over with. Finally, in the Meeting Room, Steele found peace. The original colonial-era tables, adorned with red-white-and-blue bunting, were all empty but set for the feast that would follow the inauguration. Sitting behind the desk at the front of the room, the location from which the Declaration of Independence had been drafted in over a hundred years prior, was Billy Sunday, glumly biting his nails and watching Steele enter the room and walk his way. Sunday would administer the oath of office in about ten minutes.
Sunday rose from his seat and saluted, "Mr. President, I trust you are ready for the show?"
Steele saluted back half-heartedly and answered, "Of course, of course, formalities and all. Nice to see you're in such good spirits in the face of supreme defeat, Reverend-Colonel." Steel grinned wickedly, enjoying Sunday's misery.
The preacher looked down at the old oak floor. "Yes, of course, sir. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must go address the people." Sunday bowed slightly and then left the room to head outside. Sunday couldn't believe the scope of the crowds outside. He had not seen anything like it before. Even his own ascendance to the Reverend-Colonelship years before had not been anywhere close to this energetic or size. He realized he had to play along. The American people honestly deserved Steele, he thought. They knew Steele had Roosevelt killed but everyone pretended that that idea was absurd. It was like their brains couldn't handle the thought. Even worse, Sunday was pretty sure that most of them even liked it. They had been told Roosevelt stood for degeneracy and weakness and they wished him dead for it. They approved of his assassination. While Sunday had considered a last all-or-nothing attack on Steele, he knew that, in all likelihood, the people would probably rip him into tiny shreds before Icepick Joe would even have to lift a finger. Sunday sighed and opened the door to speak to the masses. He put on his happy face and took to the podium.
"My fellow Americans, all hail! It is my utmost privilege on this beautiful sunny day to do something which has not been done since 1881. It is my highest honor to administer the oath of office to the next President of the Republican Union. Not just any Strong Man will take this oath and stand before you. Not just any war hero or adventurer will recite the solemn pledge. No, for the man who will be reciting it shortly will be the absolute Strongest Man in the Union, possibly the strongest that has ever lived. When it comes to Joe Steele, there is no doubt in my mind that he is the best man for the job and that he has been chosen by God to fulfill our sacred Destiny. Joe Steele is one of the humblest and most sincere men it has ever been my pleasure to meet. A living testament to the wise words of the Book of James, Chapter 4, Verse 10, which reads, 'Humble yourself before Jehovah your God and he shall lift you up.' My fellow Americans, three days ago I appeared before the entirety of the Union government at the Capitol and told them why I was backing Mr. Steele and why he was the legitimate leader of this our cherished country. I referenced Matthew 20:26 when I said, 'Whoever wants to become great among thee must be thy servant.' Ladies and gentlemen, truly the Union has no greater or more loyal servant than Joseph Steele. This rock of evangelical faith and family values first served his country in Holy Nippon and survived his aeroship being shot down in hostile woodlands. Upon picking themselves out of the wreck, they found themselves completely surrounded by the Shinto hordes. Armed with only a grinder gun and with ammunition belts thrown over his shoulder, he decimated the heathen attackers on the ground and saved the lives of not only himself and his crew, but also that of the Sky Marshal, our beloved Comrade-Patriot, Warren Harding, who stands behind me today holding the Bible upon which his former junior officer will swear his sacred oath."
Warren Harding nodded behind him upon his name being mentioned and bowed slightly as applause rang out. In his right hand was Aaron Burr's first personal edition of the AFC Bible. The clapping echoed for miles, as thousands of eager fascists hooted and cheered. It was the first major public gathering since the outbreak of the Beckie Flu, and the newly-vaccinated crowds were feeling triumphant, both in the war and against the Flu. The Cleansing Month was going off without a hitch so far, better than Steele, Goldstein, or Finch could have ever dreamed. As Steele came out of the door of Independence Hall, the crowds were almost hysterical once again. RUMP officers carrying Roman-style shields formed a wall to keep the crowds back a flower petals and roses were thrown over their heads. Steele smiled and stopped halfway to the podium as the band struck up "Hail to the Chief" and the Liberty Bell again rang out. Finally, he reached the podium and shook hands and saluted Sunday and Harding. There were two other men on the platform. One was Dr. Midas Goldstein, already a legend for the success of the vaccine, and the other man was ORRA Supreme Chief Dewey. Finally, Matilda Richardson also gazed proudly at what was essentially her son. Dewey, ever dignified, properly saluted Joe and and then shook his hand heartily, followed by Goldstein. Elderly Richardson saluted the new President before giving him a hug. "I want you to know, Joe," she said, "I'm very proud of you. Go be the Strong Man you were meant to be."
Finally, as the crowd and music quieted, 20 soldiers in Colonial dress and powdered wigs blew trumpets to announce the beginning of the ceremony. As they played, Harding walked forward and presented the Bible, a wrinkly red leather AFC Standard. Sunday turned to face Steele.
"Mr. Steele," Sunday began, "Are you ready to take the oath of office of the highest position in the Union?"
Steele smiled at him, knowing how miserable the preacher must be. "Yes," he said calmly, "I am."
"Place your right hand on the Bible and raise the other, sir," instructed Sunday. Steele's calloused hand slid over the book, a silver ring bearing the Union Eagle glinting in the sunlight. He was truly ready now. Dewey and Richardson smiled. Sunday then administered the oath of office.
"I, Joseph Steele, do solemnly swear upon the Holy Books of my deeply-held Christian Fundamentalist faith that I will preserve, protect, and defend the Republican Union of America and will, to the best of my ability, seek to maintain the purity of its people, institutions, culture, and the precious Pinnacle Blood that runs through our veins. So help me Jehovah."
As soon as Steele was done, Sunday said loudly, "Congratulations, Mr. President!" with as much of a false smile as he could muster before saluting.
Immediately, an Army officer standing to the side of the platform screamed "ALL HAIL THE ATHELING, PRESIDENT, AND PINNACLE MAN!" At that, every single man, woman, and child present raised their hands in silence. Tens of thousands of people gave the fascist salute to the new dictator. The eerie silence went on for a good ten seconds before, once more, the Liberty Bell rang out, signalling every other bell in the city to begin the celebrations. Down the block, ORRA officers in colonial dress fired cannons into the air, a twenty-one gun salute. The band struck up "Yankee Doodle" as loud as they could as the people cheered wildly again. Finally, Steele motioned for everyone to calm and he delivered his inaugural address.
"I am certain that my fellow Americans expect that on my induction into the Presidency I will address them with a candor and a decision which the present situation of our people impel. We have been through the dark days of adversity and we now stand in the light. The Empire is on the run, the liberal Papists flee with their tails tucked between their legs. In coordination with the Central Powers, we dealt a knock-out blow to a bloated regime well past its prime. However, as I have said before, the Central Powers left the war on terms beneficial to the Empire. That is unacceptable. But, even in the face of such a betrayal, our people have fought on, wiping out the Bonapartist menace in the Americas completely while also making headway in the Pacific. But even in these days of victory, there were many of you who feared for our future upon the outbreak of the Flu, the passing of my beloved father, all hail, and the continued insurrection in Holy Nippon. But even though many fears of setback hung over us like a fog, through it all was a beacon of Jehovah's eternal promise to the Prophet: 'Manifest Destiny shall heal our wounds and sorrow, for God our Lord has set us above all other nations.' Stand strong, true free men, against the storms the world and the devil may hurl at our dear country, this New Jerusalem. This great Nation will endure as it has endured, forever.
"Furthermore, unlike the cowardly Europeans, the Britannic Union and the Confederation of the Carolinas stand strong with us, fighting on. As long the dastardly Irish scum continue to fly their absinthe-soaked banner of degeneracy over the Emerald Isle, we shall never make peace with the Empire. We stand with our sister-regimes' war goal, which is the crippling of the Bonapartist Continental System for all time. As long as Ireland continues to fight on, my administration will never consider peace with the Imperialists.
"Proof of God's eternal light, our country has been blessed with the Cleansing Month, a program planned by my father but currently being carried out in his memory. Millions of Americans, regardless of status in Society, are being vaccinated against the Beckie Menace, perhaps the only threat greater to the Union than Bonapartist tyranny. We did it. The Anglo-Saxon Teutonic race cured the worst plague in a thousand years. With Jehovah's help, there is nothing we cannot accomplish. No plague too deadly, no foe too aggressive. Truly, it is my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself, for the Lord of Hosts is with us! Yesterday's goals become tomorrow's history.
"As our national project, the restoration of the Pinnacle Bloodline, draws closer to its conclusion, and as we continue to assert our will around the world, we must also be careful to not fall to enemies from within. Even as our blood runs purer than ever before, even as we triumph over our enemies, and even as we celebrate the conquering of the Flu, there are still elements within our society and even our government that oppose God's divine will and plot destruction and anarchy from their positions inside the deep, dark corners of state. We must be cautious, now more than ever, against letting degeneracy, Popery, anarchy, or degeneracy from taking hold inside our precious Union. As long as I breathe, the spread of this Luciferian agenda will be crushed. At no point should the average man lie awake at night worrying if his neighbor is a Catholic idolater. No Yankee mother should fear the pollution of her children's minds by left-wing agitators. Although our crime statistics are low, any crime at all in God's Kingdom is entirely unacceptable.
"With this righteous mission from Jehovah fueling the fire in my belly, my first official act as your oath-sworn President and Atheling will be the implementation of what I have called the Focus on the Family Act. Working together with our loyal RUMP, ORRA, and military heroes, we will conduct a purge of sorts upon the sinners among us. Earlier today, I signed the Focus on the Family into law, legal as soon as I took the oath. With this program, I created what we have called 'Redemption Maniples,' which are military units where lawbreakers may save their careers and lives. Beginning today, those Betters arrested for such offenses as buggery, degeneracy, adultery, robbery, refusal to work, and other despicable acts will be given a single chance to retake their place among the Betters of Society by serving in the Redemption Maniples. While this initial crackdown may seem harsh, it is in fact a mercy. Instead of letting Betters fester in the prisons of our nation, never useful again and living off taxpayer eagles, they will be allowed to redeem themselves. For Jesus Christ showed mercy upon the least of the people of Judea, why should the New Jerusalem not follow the example of our Heavenly King? But as it is merciful to sinners it is also unwavering in its defense of our nation's virtue. While before adultery was treated as a personal issue, between a family and Jehovah, it will now be publicly treated as a high crime and felony. America's families are the heart of our nation, and the debauched hedonism and lackadaisical approach to the institution of marriage which is practiced in other realms has no place here. Just as we shall bring stability to the world, so to shall we bring stability to the family unit. Indeed, we cannot have one without the other. The Focus on the Family Act will apply to every American Better, regardless of status or position, and will be implemented as swiftly as law enforcement can accomplish.
"With these words, America, I leave you today. I seek to bring order, prosperity, wealth, and safety to us and to future generations. The state of this fallen world demands action by God's Chosen! America calls for action! We humbly beseech Almighty Jehovah to lead us, this and every day, and to use us as the instrument of his will, amen and all hail!"
Soldiers and citizens celebrate Steele's inauguration in the streets
President Steele watches as ORRA troops march by
Stereoscopic slide of RUMP officers on parade
