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offtopic:thandislam

Thandislam

A religion based on the marvelous tradition of blaming Thande (Blame Be Upon Him). It is often syncretized with other religions.

Just like Rastafarianism and the emperor Haile Selassie I of Ethiopia, it should be noted that Thande (BBUH) himself is not a believer in Thandislam and indeed does not see what all the fuss is about.


The Five Pillars of Thandislam

For Thandislamics, there are five “pillars” that guide their everyday lives.

  • Profession of Faith - Constantly Blame Thande (BBUH), publicly, and with no shame.
  • Daily Prayer - Five times daily one must prostrate before their computer screen and say:

“There is no one to blame but Thande, and Hermanubis blamed him first.”

  • Paying of Alms - One must spend 2.5% of their annual income helping those with low post counts.
  • Fasting - One must go without the computer from sun-up to sundown during the ninth month of the calendar, so that one might discover how to Blame Thande (BBUH) while not on AH.COM. In this way we grow closer to the Great Blamer.
  • Pilgrimage - At least once in one's life, one must journey to Thande's place and blame him to his face.

Beings of Annoyance

Alas, there are beings that doth annoy the hell out of Thande. Beware them ! And lo and behold:

Thande - List of Enemies


Thandislamist members

  • Petike (in his own words): “Thandislam is a peaceful and insightful religion, often misjudged…
  • oberdada (“For no apparent reason.”)

offtopic/thandislam.txt · Last modified: 2019/03/29 15:13 (external edit)