Differences

This shows you the differences between two versions of the page.

--- offtopic:running_jokes [2017/03/15 01:24] – [Running Jokes] petike
+++ offtopic:running_jokes [2022/10/28 06:28] (current) – [Running Jokes] petike
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 ====== Running Jokes ======
-AH.com has so many running jokes that trying to present a comprehensive list would be madness. Therefore, here it is.
+AH.com has so many running jokes that trying to present a comprehensive list would be madness. Therefore, here it is. Please note that these running gags are listed in rough chronological order.
-**[[The Forks]]**: Originally devised by [[offtopic:Michael]] back in 2004, the Forks used to be called for whenever a soul-scarring incident occurs on the board, such as [[offtopic:The Mists of Time]] showing off his photo collection. Now replaced by the **Brain Bleach** which people say is more efficient.
+**[[The Forks]]**: Originally devised by [[Michael]] back in 2004, the Forks used to be called for whenever a soul-scarring incident occurs on the board, such as [[The Mists of Time]] showing off his photo collection. Now replaced by the **Brain Bleach** which people say is more efficient.
 **[[Dave Howery]]**: Everyone used to be strangely convinced that Dave has a giant bushy biker beard (which he strenuously denies) and Dave himself wants to invade Canada with an army of robot tanks. Now people just ignore him. See main article.
-**Hockey-Rice**:  [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=3656|A 2004 ASB scenario]] by [[offtopic:KJM]] in which Canada and China merge into one country called Hockey-Rice to provide a worthy opponent to the USA. Its flag is a colour-inverted and flipped Nazi flag. [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=20685|Often]] [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=75677|referenced]] in mid-2000s AH.com media.
+**Hockey-Rice**:  [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=3656|A 2004 ASB scenario]] by [[KJM]] in which Canada and China merge into one country called Hockey-Rice to provide a worthy opponent to the USA. Its flag is a colour-inverted and flipped Nazi flag. [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=75677|Often referenced]] in mid-2000s AH.com media.
-**The [[Sheep Thread]], AKA "SHEEP THE SIZE OF VW CAMPER VANS!!!!!!"**: Legendary ASB thread created by Landshark which ran for many pages and spawned multiple [[offtopic:AH.com Religions]].
+**The [[Sheep Thread]], AKA "SHEEP THE SIZE OF VW CAMPER VANS!!!!!!"**: Legendary ASB thread created by Landshark which ran for many pages and spawned multiple [[AH.com Religions]].
 **[[Blaming Thande]]**: Because Thande is the cause of all the world's evils. See main article.
-**[[Hermanubis]] and [[offtopic:Imajin]] are the same person**: Deduced by [[Thande]].
+**[[Hermanubis]] and [[Imajin]] are the same person**: Deduced by [[Thande]].
-**[[MrP]] and [[Fellatio Nelson]] are actually black**: Deduced by [[John1761|John Reynolds]], revived for the [[offtopic:Michael E Johnson#MEJ]] fiasco. [[Rattslinger]] and [[Hazazel]] later unearthed the fact that they both sing backing vocals for a black supremacist heavy metal band called Cracker Annihilation, under the stage names "Milk Wrath" and "Cookie Death".
+**[[MrP]] and [[Fellatio Nelson]] are actually black**: Deduced by [[John1761|John Reynolds]], revived for the [[Michael E Johnson#MEJ]] fiasco. [[Rattslinger]] and [[Hazazel]] later unearthed the fact that they both sing backing vocals for a black supremacist heavy metal band called Cracker Annihilation, under the stage names "Milk Wrath" and "Cookie Death".
 In [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=124625|an unrelated incident]], it was discovered that [[MrP]]'s rapper alter ego, Gingir Bomba, was in fact ruler of a central African empire.
 **[[Leej]] is [[Landshark]]'s illegitimate son**: Developed by various people after a comment by [[Thande]].
-**[[masteraccount]] references, particularly to his threads.** Masteraccount was a troll with a cult following known for his obsession with Sonic the Hedgehog and bizarre and/or apocalyptic ASB scenarios.
-Some common references include (but are not limited to): What if Peoples blood becoming strawberry syrup, earth exploding in 1982, Sonic the Hedgehog in 1926, etc.
 **Floid Country Demonyms**: After a drunk [[Fellatio Nelson]] asked [[Floid]] if he was "Sudanases", using -ases as a country demonym has caught on. Other uses include 'Chineases' for China and 'Hondurases' for Honduras.
@@ Line 40: / Line 35: @@
 **Global Warming Debates**: A subject which has been so often argued in Political Chat that the threads have now descended to self-parody. Essentially, the Americans are convinced that depriving any man, woman, child or global mega-corporation of their right to churn out enough Carbon Dioxide to put out the Sun is tantamount to worshipping Mao (we're running out of loony dictators, chaps), while everyone else thinks it's a good idea.
-**Education Debates**: A subject which has been so often argued in Political Chat that the threads have now descended to self-parody. Essentially, [[MrP]] & [[Thande]] are convinced that vote-grubbing British politicians have doomed us to a future of post-apocalyptic nightmare (including the spread of the dreaded Grocer's Apostrophe), while [[Justin Pickard]] and [[Kit]] believe that the system is splendid, n taht poepul r nu briter then evar. See also [[offtopic:Campaign to Overthrow and Undermine the teaching of Glib History]]; [[British Education System]].
+**Education Debates**: A subject which has been so often argued in Political Chat that the threads have now descended to self-parody. Essentially, [[MrP]] & [[Thande]] are convinced that vote-grubbing British politicians have doomed us to a future of post-apocalyptic nightmare (including the spread of the dreaded Grocer's Apostrophe), while [[Justin Pickard]] and [[Kit]] believe that the system is splendid, n taht poepul r nu briter then evar. See also [[Campaign to Overthrow and Undermine the teaching of Glib History]]; [[British Education System]].
 **xyz gone mad #123456**: A running joke in thread titles. Started with and usually still is "Political Correctness", with the number of course being random but high. Such threads include a totally asinine story that derives its craziness from the thread title's topic, for example political correctness. Other examples include Health and Safety or EU Bureaucracy. On the occasion when a PC-gone-mad idea is actually shot down, it is customary to post the news with the title "Common Sense Gone Sane Part #34" with a much smaller number. A recent addition to the list, courtesy of [[MrP]], is "Chavez Thread #2353543453", in which we learn the everyday happenings of the cheeky chirpy crack-smoking socialist dictator of Venezuela.
-**The Germano-Russo-EU Alliance of Doom for Poland**: Germany, Russia and the EU are all conspiring to dismember Poland and kill all the Poles, as evidenced by the behaviour of mid-nineteenth century German settlers on the American Plains. Er, fictional Germans in a cowboy book, mind. An idea originally propounded as serious by [[HurganPL]], and subsequently cited by everyone else as evidence that Hurgan's from an [[alternate history:ATL]].
+**The Germano-Russo-EU Alliance of Doom for [[Poland]]**: [[Germany]], [[Russia]] and the EU are all conspiring to dismember Poland and kill all the Poles, as evidenced by the behaviour of mid-nineteenth century German settlers on the American Plains. Er, fictional Germans in a cowboy book, mind. An idea originally propounded as serious by [[HurganPL]], and subsequently cited by everyone else as evidence that Hurgan's from an [[alternate history:ATL]].
 **Fake Spanish**: Popularised by [[Thermopylae]], the Fake Spanish language is often called upon when presenting new media for a TL, especially "El Mappo!" whenever a new map is made. (Real Spanish would be 'La Carte!' or "¡El Mapa!") Fake Spanish is also often used with respect to the [[Heterosexual Reconquista]].
-**The Inevitable Republic of Deseret/Inevitable Kingdom of [[Burgundy]]/Inevitable Kingdom of Hungary**: A term coined by [[Imajin]] for Deseret and then modified by [[Thande]] for Burgundy and by some other members for Hungary, to describe how those two states often pop up in maps of North America and Europe, respectively, with little explanation, often defying the [[alternate history:butterfly effect]]. This meme also inspired the name 'Inevitablid Caliphate of Europe' (see below).
+**The Inevitable Republic of [[alternate history:Deseret]]/Inevitable Kingdom of [[Burgundy]]/Inevitable Kingdom of [[Hungary]]**: A term coined by [[Imajin]] for Deseret and then modified by [[Thande]] for Burgundy and by some other members for Hungary, to describe how those two states often pop up in maps of North America and Europe, respectively, with little explanation, often defying the [[alternate history:butterfly effect]]. This meme also inspired the name 'Inevitablid Caliphate of Europe' (see below).
 **The [[alternate_history:Space Filling Empire]]**: Another map term invented by Imajin, to describe how inexperienced mapmakers often fill up areas they have no ideas about (usually Africa or Central Asia) with a poorly defined empire or union of some kind. The concept is now referenced at TV Tropes.
@@ Line 54: / Line 49: @@
 **The Inevitablid/Obligatid/Randomid/Implausiblid/Destinid/Bigassid Caliphates**: Originally a term for the [[alternate_history:fh_cliches|common future history cliche]] of an eeeeeviiiiiil [[Teh Evol Muslims#Muslim-immigrant caliphate]] taking over Europe, it evolved into something of a running joke when refering to caliphates appearing in alternate history and future history. There are seven rival dynasties, each purportedly named after their (made-up) founders, the first three as named by [[fortyseven]]:
   *The Inevitablid Caliphate, founded by Inevitabeel
-  *The Obligatid Caliphate, founded by Obligaat. (Discovered by [[offtopic:VulcanTrekkie45]])
+  *The Obligatid Caliphate, founded by Obligaat. (Discovered by [[VulcanTrekkie45]])
-  *The Randomid Caliphate, founded by Randam. (Discovered by [[offtopic:Thande]])
+  *The Randomid Caliphate, founded by Randam. (Discovered by [[Thande]])
-  *The Implausiblid Caliphate, founded by Implausibeel. (Discovered by [[[offtopic:emperor_qianlong|Emperor Qianlong]])
+  *The Implausiblid Caliphate, founded by Implausibeel. (Discovered by [[Emperor Qianlong]])
-  *The Destinid Caliphate, founded by Destinel. (discovered by [[offtopic:Turquoise Blue]])
+  *The Destinid Caliphate, founded by Destinel. (discovered by [[Turquoise Blue]])
-  *The Bigassid Caliphate, founded by Bigazi. (discovered by [[offtopic:meerkat92|Meerkat92]])
+  *The Bigassid Caliphate, founded by Bigazi. (discovered by [[Meerkat92]])
-  *The ASB Caliphate, founded by Asbis (discovered by [[offtopic:Petike]])
+  *The ASB Caliphate, founded by Asbis (discovered by [[Petike]])
-**Is any of us really real?** Someone once suggested that [[Doctor What]] was the only real poster, and the rest of us are just Ian typing really quickly to give the impression of hundreds of people. [[offtopic:fortyseven]] suggested that we are all Ian's sockpuppets and that Ian has an extreme case of multiple personality disorder. In similar fashion, [[offtopic:HARRY]] suggested that all the posts were really made by Turtledove sockpuppets, except for the innuendoey ones which were the work of Stirling.
+**Is any of us really real?** Someone once suggested that [[Doctor What]] was the only real poster, and the rest of us are just Ian typing really quickly to give the impression of hundreds of people. [[fortyseven]] suggested that we are all Ian's sockpuppets and that Ian has an extreme case of multiple personality disorder. In similar fashion, [[HARRY]] suggested that all the posts were really made by Turtledove sockpuppets, except for the innuendoey ones which were the work of Stirling.
 **The Nonexistent States of America:** Most of the Britons on the board firmly believe that the Dakotas, Wyoming, Colorado etc. are entirely fictional, and were only invented by American airline companies in order to make their planes seem faster than they are on flights from the east coast to the west coast. This is strongly denied by most of the American posters, especially those who believe they live in the said nonexistent states: on the contrary, according to the Americans, it is [[Delaware]] that is fictional.
@@ Line 71: / Line 66: @@
 **[[Germany#The Germans']] obsession with obscure political debates**: Especially true of [[Steffen]] and [[Susano]]. Steffen's famous comment is that one time at a bar he rather would discuss reforms to the welfare state than watch the topless dancer, and was even rather annoyed by her.
-**[[Germany#The Germans]] are a hive mind**, and again especially [[Steffen]] and [[Susano]] and their political differences just a ploy, or a form of schizophrenia. [[offtopic:Kabraloth]] is also assumed to be part of this hivemind, which is mostly named for Susano. Hence, [[Kabraloth]] and [[Steffen]] had their respetcive user titles be "Not a Susano" for a while, while Susano's was "Also Steffen and Kabraloth". Since then, Susano muses who else could be part of his hivemind - for example, [[offtopic:Dr Pervez Hoodbhoy]], as he can answer as quickly to provocations as Susano.
+**[[Germany#The Germans]] are a hive mind**, and again especially [[Steffen]] and [[Susano]] and their political differences just a ploy, or a form of schizophrenia. [[Kabraloth]] is also assumed to be part of this hivemind, which is mostly named for Susano. Hence, Kabraloth and Steffen had their respective user titles be "Not a Susano" for a while, while Susano's was "Also Steffen and Kabraloth". Since then, Susano muses who else could be part of his hivemind - for example, [[Dr Pervez Hoodbhoy]], as he can answer as quickly to provocations as Susano.
 Interestingly, [[Zyzzyva]] appears to have joined the hivemind as well, this being [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=116840&page=3|so he can disagree with]] [[Susano]].
@@ Line 79: / Line 74: @@
 **[[alternate history:Byzantine Empire|Byzantine]] [[alternate history:Airships]] are the epitome of cool**: An opinion expressed by [[Midgard]], [[Sargon]] and others ([[Abdul Hadi Pasha]] considers them to be second in coolness to Ottoman airships) for many years. In 2007 it essentially became the manifesto of the [[Evil Party]].
-**[[offtopic:Keenir]] is actually [[offtopic:MrP]] posting while tired and amnesiac**: A certain similarity of style noted by P himself, while [[offtopic:Thande]] suggested that Keenir's knowledge of Turkish may come from P falling asleep on a volume of Ottoman battleship designs and the principle of knowledge osmosis.
+**[[Keenir]] is actually [[MrP]] posting while tired and amnesiac**: A certain similarity of style noted by P himself, while [[Thande]] suggested that Keenir's knowledge of Turkish may come from P falling asleep on a volume of Ottoman battleship designs and the principle of knowledge osmosis.
-**[[offtopic:Landshark]] was**: But we stopped chasing him.
+**[[Landshark]] was**: But we stopped chasing him.
-**The Bannedwagon**: Joke started by [[DominusNovus]], where a word similar to Banned/Kicked is placed in the user title, with the intended affect of causing another user to freak out at a normal board member being Banned/Kicked. Dominus originally used the actual word Banned, after which Ian stopped people being able to use it, and double-take workarounds such as Bamed or Barned were adopted. Another variation is to alter the word Banned to suggest your own username, such as [[offtopic:Thande#Thanned]] or [[offtopic:Ran Exilis#Ranned]]. The term 'bannedwagon' for the popularity of the joke was invented by [[offtopic:KJM]].
+**The Bannedwagon**: Joke started by [[DominusNovus]], where a word similar to Banned/Kicked is placed in the user title, with the intended affect of causing another user to freak out at a normal board member being Banned/Kicked. Dominus originally used the actual word Banned, after which Ian stopped people being able to use it, and double-take workarounds such as Bamed or Barned were adopted. Another variation is to alter the word Banned to suggest your own username, such as [[Thande#Thanned]] or [[Ran Exilis#Ranned]]. The term 'bannedwagon' for the popularity of the joke was invented by [[KJM]].
-**[[offtopic:Logic and Reason]]**: Several members, notably [[offtopic:GBW]], occasionally forget and recourse to these two concepts, which are taboo on AH.com. The correct response to this is a pitying shake of the head and 'You're using logic and reason again...'
+**[[Logic and Reason]]**: Several members, notably [[GBW]], occasionally forget and recourse to these two concepts, which are taboo on AH.com. The correct response to this is a pitying shake of the head and 'You're using logic and reason again...'
 **Every member has an Antipodean counterpart**: First noticed with [[Mr_J]] / [[MrP]]. [[The Bald Imposter#Baldie]] has objected to this theory on the grounds that [[Fellatio Nelson#his doppelganger]] is transatlantic rather than Antipodean.
-**Chinese inventions**: According to AH.com, not only did [[China]] invent gunpowder, the printing press etc. before anyone else, but also any concept that comes up in a thread about China, such as censorship, [[United States of America#America]], and exaggeration. Most notably, as [[Dave Howery]] observed, the Chinese invented bears, you know.
+**Chinese inventions**: According to AH.com, not only did [[China]] invent gunpowder, the printing press etc. before anyone else, but also any concept that comes up in a thread about China, such as censorship, [[usa|America]], and exaggeration. Most notably, as [[Dave Howery]] observed, the Chinese invented bears, you know.
-Interestingly, as observed by [[Thande]], the **Romans** [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showpost.php?p=3255953&postcount=1388|invented Taoism, South Korea, and Pepsi-Cola]]...
+Interestingly, as observed by [[Thande]], the **Romans** [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/threads/1/post-3255953|invented Taoism, South Korea, and Pepsi-Cola]]...
 **[[Landshark]] is actually Mama Cass out of the Mamas and the Papas**: Deduced by [[The Bald Imposter]].
-**[[Thread Hijackings]]**: Whether it is purposeful or not, most threads in Chat and NP Chat end up getting pulled off topic, also called hijacking. [[offtopic:VulcanTrekkie45]] created a thread to document these happenings, but it was quickly hijacked and died.
+**[[Thread Hijackings]]**: Whether it is purposeful or not, most threads in Chat and NP Chat end up getting pulled off topic, also called hijacking. [[VulcanTrekkie45]] created a thread to document these happenings, but it was quickly hijacked and died.
 **[[Ignore Threads]]**: If anyone makes a mistake posting a thread (or duplicates it), and therefore deletes the content and changes the title to 'Ignore', it is customary for almost all the online members to post in that thread with comments such as 'you want me to ignore this thread? Right, I'm ignoring it...'
-**The Four Horsemen of the AH.com-alypse**: After several members complained about //The Office// in  [[http://www.alternatehistory.net/discussion/showthread.php?t=76670|The Official British TV Thread]], [[offtopic:Sargon]] noted that there were now four members available that could form some sort of group.  [[offtopic:MrP]] suggested //The Four Horsemen of the AH.com-alypse//, and everyone thought this was a good idea, agreeing upon [[offtopic:Thande]] as Pestilence (because of the effect of his chemical concoctions), [[offtopic:MrP]] as War (due to his WW1 warship interests), [[offtopic:Sargon]] as Death (seeing as he's a member of the EVIL Party) and [[offtopic:The Dean]] as Famine (attributed to his waistline and the fact that he could be a one-man cause of one).  [[offtopic:Keenir]] wanted to be the Fifth Horseman, but as there's some confusion on the issue, that'll be settled later.  An AH.com Series episode is confidently expected to be written about this at some point.
+**The Four Horsemen of the AH.com-alypse**: After several members complained about //The Office// in  [[http://www.alternatehistory.net/discussion/showthread.php?t=76670|The Official British TV Thread]], [[Sargon]] noted that there were now four members available that could form some sort of group.  [[MrP]] suggested //The Four Horsemen of the AH.com-alypse//, and everyone thought this was a good idea, agreeing upon [[Thande]] as Pestilence (because of the effect of his chemical concoctions), [[MrP]] as War (due to his WW1 warship interests), [[Sargon]] as Death (seeing as he's a member of the EVIL Party) and [[The Dean]] as Famine (attributed to his waistline and the fact that he could be a one-man cause of one).  [[Keenir]] wanted to be the Fifth Horseman, but as there's some confusion on the issue, that'll be settled later.  An AH.com Series episode is confidently expected to be written about this at some point.
-**[[Archangel Michael]] and [[offtopic:The Sicilian]] are the same person**: Deduced by [[offtopic:VulcanTrekkie45]].
+**[[Archangel Michael]] and [[The Sicilian]] are the same person**: Deduced by [[VulcanTrekkie45]].
 **Wikipedia**: Because of various //interesting// renderings of history on [[Wikipedia]], it's become common when referring to looking at it to make reference to one of the Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth, [[Israel]] or the [[Armenian Genocide]] no matter which article one has been reading. For example, one might claim to have been inspecting a history of pottery in Asia Minor, and mention as an aside that the Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth is responsible for the elaborate artistry.
-**The Americans cannot organise a [[AH.com meetups#meet-up]]**: Accompanied by much chortling, usually from the British members, this joke mostly dates from 2006, when the British members managed to have about five meetups and the Americans failed to have any, even though zillions of them live near each other in small areas like [[New Jersey]]. The joke has died off since the Americans did manage two meetups in 2007 in [[New York City]] - although as both meetings had a Commonwealth subject attending ([[Kit]] and [[Doctor What]]) there have been claims that the meet-ups only happened because of British-derived organisation. Much like [[Psychomeltdown]] moving the goalposts for [[Writer Chimps#Writer Chimphood]] to keep excluding [[Michael]], the British members kept redefining what constituted a 'meet-up' for a while to keep excluding earlier American efforts. Notably, the even less successful efforts of the Germans, Australians etc. are much more rarely mocked...
+**The Americans cannot organise a [[AH.com meetups|meetup]]**: Accompanied by much chortling, usually from the British members, this joke mostly dates from 2006, when the British members managed to have about five meetups and the Americans failed to have any, even though zillions of them live near each other in small areas like [[New Jersey]]. The joke has died off since the Americans did manage two meetups in 2007 in [[New York City]] - although as both meetings had a Commonwealth subject attending ([[Kit]] and [[Doctor What]]) there have been claims that the meet-ups only happened because of British-derived organisation. Much like [[Psychomeltdown]] moving the goalposts for [[Writer Chimps#Writer Chimphood]] to keep excluding [[Michael]], the British members kept redefining what constituted a 'meet-up' for a while to keep excluding earlier American efforts. Notably, the even less successful efforts of the Germans, Australians etc. are much more rarely mocked... After many years, the spell of this running gag was finally broken in May 20//17//, [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/threads/summer-washington-d-c-meetup.416951/page-4|when]] a group of AH.commers attended a successful meetup in Washington. All //8// of them. ;)
-**[[offtopic:alt_historian]], [[offtopic:MrP]], and [[offtopic:VulcanTrekkie45]] are all related**: Because they are all apparently descended from [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eochaid_Mugmedon|Eochaid Mugmedon]]. Deduced by [[offtopic:VulcanTrekkie45]].
+**[[alt_historian]], [[MrP]], and [[VulcanTrekkie45]] are all related**: Because they are all apparently descended from [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eochaid_Mugmedon|Eochaid Mugmedon]]. Deduced by [[VulcanTrekkie45]].
 **Swedish politics**: A popular thread digression, usually resorted to in [[WyldCard4]]'s threads to twit his inability to understand AH.com. Despite the fact that it is usually started by [[LordInsane]], who claims to be a Norwegian exile. Madness? THIS...IS...AH.COOOOOM!!!
-**The Irish are Chinese**: British posters are occasionally irritated by claims from Americans who neither speak Irish nor have visited Ireland nor know any Irish people that they (the Americans) are Irish. Even less typically, an American with real connexions to Ireland will say something silly. So when Oweno/Rocano recently claimed that the Irish (who live on the second largest of the British Isles) are not British, [[offtopic:MrP]] agreed, noting that the Irish are in fact Chinese. With any luck this joke will run and run.
+**The Irish are Chinese**: British posters are occasionally irritated by claims from Americans who neither speak Irish nor have visited Ireland nor know any Irish people that they (the Americans) are Irish. Even less typically, an American with real connexions to Ireland will say something silly. So when Oweno/Rocano recently claimed that the Irish (who live on the second largest of the British Isles) are not British, [[MrP]] agreed, noting that the Irish are in fact Chinese. With any luck this joke will run and run.
 **Glaaawwbul Waaarming**: Based on a the joke Irish pronunciation of the phrase by Bono and the Edge in Harry Enfield and Paul Whitehouse's sketch show. Usually invoked when mocking eco-mentalists who blame absolutely any negative event in the world on 'glawwwbul waarming'. Also sometimes called 'glerble werming', after the Mancunian pronunciation.
@@ Line 127: / Line 122: @@
 **The Worthless U.S. Dollar**: Due to the decline in value of the U.S. dollar in 2007 and 2008, it is customary to describe the exchange rate to the British Pound Sterling or the Euro as being something like 750,000 to one, as though the U.S. dollar is now a form of lire.
-**AH.com Doppelgangers**: A complex topic which deals with lookalikes of AH.commers in the world of celebrities, entertainment, or just on the streets. Perhaps the most notorious lookey-likey is [[Doctor What]] with Jeff Goldblum. However, some members are known to have a startling number of duplicates, and this has been recognised - [[Flocculencio]]'s Flocculgangers, [[Hendryk]]'s Hendryklones, and [[offtopic:deh74|Gottheit]] being seventy four different people.
+**AH.com Doppelgangers**: A complex topic which deals with lookalikes of AH.commers in the world of celebrities, entertainment, or just on the streets. Perhaps the most notorious lookey-likey is [[Doctor What]] with Jeff Goldblum. However, some members are known to have a startling number of duplicates, and this has been recognised - [[Flocculencio]]'s Flocculgangers, [[Hendryk]]'s Hendryklones, and [[deh74|Gottheit]] being seventy four different people.
 **Li'l [[Michael E Johnson#MEJ]]**: When anyone says anything that MEJ could possibly have construed as racist (i.e. when anyone says anything), it is customary for [[Archangel Michael]] to post an image meme which consists of a black kid silently mouthing "That's Racist!"
@@ Line 141: / Line 136: @@
 **Reverse American Politics**: One strange aspect about the [[American politics]] on the board is that many U.S. members have registered party identities totally disconnected with their political views. For example, [[Grimm Reaper]] is a Democrat and [[NapoleonXIV]] is a Republican. Possibly connected with this is the fact that a British political test thinks that [[DelawareConfederate#DelawareWerewolf]] should vote for the hard-left socialist Respect party. Recently, [[Paul Spring]] (a right-wing member who often debates politics with [[Leo Caesius]]) revealed he planned to vote for Obama, while Leo himself was seriously considering voting for McCain. Another addition to this was the revelation of [[MacCaulay]] that, despite being a self-declared Libertarian, he had worked for Howard Dean's presidential campaign in 2004.
-**Pin the Zion on the Eurasia**: A reference to the fact that [[Israel]] appears in multitudinous and bizarre places in many timelines. The title here was coined by [[ninebucks]].
+**[[alternate_history:alternate_israels|Pin the Zion on the Eurasia]]**: A reference to the fact that [[Israel]] appears in multitudinous and bizarre places in many timelines. The title here was coined by [[ninebucks]].
 **[[Cyrrylia#The Teachings of St Cyril the Inherent]]**: As bestowed upon AH.com by one remarkable man, whose unique moral teachings are simply beyond the capacity of the mundane human mind to comprehend.
@@ Line 147: / Line 142: @@
 **The Landgraviate of P**: Based on [[MrP]] being nicknamed Herr von P because of his supposed German-ness, [[LordInsane]] objected that this meant that there had to be a place in Germany called "P". [[Thande]] then deduced that there was in fact a tiny city-state of the [[alternate history:Holy Roman Empire]] that had been named "P" because there wasn't enough room to fit any more letters in on the map.
-**Nuclear reactors, a Jewish conspiracy with no backup plan**: With thanks to our latest insane troll, [[Eleven11]], we now know that nuclear reactors do not exist, they are simply a cover-up by the cabal of Jews who run the world, and in fact Wozza's uncle is employed in the job of squeezing oil out of potatoes on the inside. We also know that anyone without a backup plan must be the result of a cover-up, or something.
+**Nuclear reactors, a Jewish conspiracy with no backup plan**: With thanks to our latest insane troll, [[Eleven11]], we now know that nuclear reactors do not exist, they are simply a cover-up by the cabal of Jews who run the world, and in fact [[Wozza]]'s uncle is employed in the job of squeezing oil out of potatoes on the inside. We also know that anyone without a backup plan must be the result of a cover-up, or something.
 **Made-up Running Jokes**: Apparently, a joke, by definition, is a running joke if it appears on the [[Running Jokes]] page.  This was taken to an extreme by [[Codae]], who added "Made-up Running Jokes" to the wiki page, despite the utter lack of use on the forum beforehand.  Who is to be [[Blaming Thande|blamed]] for this practice?  [[Thande]], most likely.
@@ Line 157: / Line 152: @@
 **The [[BBC System of Measurements]]**: Often talked about when posting BBC News articles and invoked to settle metric vs. imperial disputes.
-**[[Offtopic:Memetic Mutation]]**: Usually occurs with memes that refer to certain noteworthy trolls, or to posts by normal members judged to be particularily lunatic. Those memes are then wildly mixed.
+**[[Memetic Mutation]]**: Usually occurs with memes that refer to certain noteworthy trolls, or to posts by normal members judged to be particularily lunatic. Those memes are then wildly mixed.
 **Time Travellers**: It has been deduced that [[Ofaloaf]], because of his mutton chops and wide-eyed expression of wonder, and [[Admiral Canaris]] because of his conservative political views, are both time travellers from the year 1890, like that bloke out of the film //Time Changer//. Later, it was found that [[Roberto]] is one of the original Scottish Darien colonists who fell through a time portal to the present day, as this is the only conceivable explanation for a ginger Hondurasesian. His dad, possibly related to this, is an Antarctican. There also remains a minority view that [[Ran Exilis]] is from the seventeenth century (because of his hair), and fled to the twenty-first in order to escape angry fathers all across the Dutch East Indies. This further explains the recent influx of Indonesian members - they're all Ran's great-great-great-great-grandchildren who have inherited his love of AH and did not exist in the timestream before his adventures. There were also rumblings that [[VulcanTrekkie45]] might have been from the late 19th century when he posted his full name for the first time. It has also been suggested, on grounds of general similarity in appearance, that [[Archangel Michael]] may be destined to travel back in time and assume the role of Rasputin. A recent addition to the ranks of the possible time travellers is [[mowque]], due to his lack of interest in any media form developed since about 1875.
@@ Line 167: / Line 162: @@
 **[[The Dean]]'s private army**: [[Hendryk]] has noted that [[The Dean]]'s supposedly innocent activities of supervising kids in healthy outdoorsy activities actually correspond suspiciously to a regime of training for a private army. It is speculated that El Deano is planning a coup.
-**[[offtopic:DelawareConfederate|DelawareWerewolf]] is really a were-poodle**: Inspired when user DelawarePoodle (now EvolvedLupine) posted a thread entitled [[http://alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=82090&highlight=were-poodle|Question about collars]]. On the basis that you wouldn't find a wolf wearing a collar [[Cockroach]] proposed that DW wasn't actually a werewolf but rather a were-poodle.
+**[[DelawareConfederate|DelawareWerewolf]] is really a were-poodle**: Inspired when user DelawarePoodle (now EvolvedLupine) posted a thread entitled [[http://alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=82090&highlight=were-poodle|Question about collars]]. On the basis that you wouldn't find a wolf wearing a collar, [[Cockroach]] proposed that DW wasn't actually a werewolf but rather a were-poodle.
-**[[Red Alert]]**: Westwood/EA's Command&Conquer: Red Alert series of games has provided a number of AH.com running jokes (see main article).
+**[[Red Alert]]**: Westwood/EA's //Command&Conquer: Red Alert// series of games has provided a number of AH.com running jokes (see main article).
 **Libertarian Somalia**: Whenever anyone mentions American Libertarianism, [[Hendryk]] (or occasionally someone else, usually [[Kidblast]]) will point out that all the supposed qualifications for a libertarian paradise are met in modern Somalia, and then invite any proponents of Libertarianism to move there.
-**[[offtopic:Member doppelgangers]]**: A long-standing running joke surrounding several members who have posted their pictures, and their resemblance to each other, celebrities, and people encountered in daily life.
+**[[Member doppelgangers]]**: A long-standing running joke surrounding several members who have posted their pictures, and their resemblance to each other, celebrities, and people encountered in daily life.
 **Royal alter egos**: Various members have been identified with members of the British Royal Family - Susano with Prince Philip due to dodgy comments about the Chinese, and MrP with Prince Charles due to their shared interests in whisky and talking to plants. This technically means Susano is P's dad.
-**When did it become (year) again?**: Coined by [[The Bald Imposter]] originally, this has become popular with many other members. Essentially, when a member (usually a newish one) posts some very old and well-known internet phenomenon as though it is new (e.g. Chuck Norris facts, "All Your Base Are Belong To Us"), Baldie would interject with "When did it become 2002 again?" or similar. Possibly the most extreme example of this was in 2008, when a member posted the famous 'Things I Shall Do When I Become An Evil Overlord' list and [[Flocculencio]] kindly replied with "Welcome to 1998, my friend!"
+**When did it become (year) again?**: Coined by [[The Bald Imposter]] originally, this has become popular with many other members. Essentially, when a member (usually a newish one) posts some very old and well-known internet phenomenon as though it is new (e.g. [[Chuck Norris]] facts, "All Your Base Are Belong To Us"), Baldie would interject with "When did it become 2002 again?" or similar. Possibly the most extreme example of this was in 2008, when a member posted the famous 'Things I Shall Do When I Become An Evil Overlord' list and [[Flocculencio]] kindly replied with "Welcome to 1998, my friend!"
 **The House of O**: Largely derived from [[Fellatio Nelson]]'s habit of referring to [[Susano]] as "Susan O". The House of O is a mysterious family whose other members include [[Roberto#Robert O]], [[09camaro#09Camar O]], [[mojojojo#Mojojoj O]], [[frankolio#Frankoli O]], and of course [[Fellatio Nelson#Fellati O]] himself.
-**[[Iceland]] is a bizarre alien fish**: [[Communist Wizard]] posted a map of Iceland, prompting [[Grimm Reaper]] to note the aforementioned resemblance; after [[Thande]] referenced an old map depicting [[Iceland]] as such, [[Grimm Reaper]] pointed out that this would explain the country's obsession with its cod spawn (see [[Cod Wars]]).
+**[[Iceland]] is a bizarre alien fish**: [[Communist Wizard]] posted a map of Iceland, prompting [[Grimm Reaper]] to note the aforementioned resemblance; after [[Thande]] referenced an old map depicting [[Iceland]] as such, Grimm Reaper pointed out that this would explain the country's obsession with its cod spawn (see [[Cod Wars]]).
 **CreeperSpeak**: [[The Bald Imposter]] once summarised [[thecreeper]]'s posting style and political opinions as "obama good obama win" (sometimes addended with "mccain bad mccain lose"). Although thecreeper has improved since then, this proved such an iconic meme that it keeps cropping up in different contexts even after the [[2008 US presidential election]] concluded.
@@ Line 195: / Line 190: @@
 **[[Barack Obama]]**: Is a commie muslim fascist liberal atheist socialist commie atheist muslim terrorist, apparently.
-**American NewSpeak**: Based on "[[offtopic:types of ah wanks|Ameriwank]]", variations such as "Ameriteen", "Amerileft" and "Ameriright/Ameright" have sprung up to describe various demographics of U.S. posters and political fields.
+**American NewSpeak**: Based on "[[types of ah wanks|Ameriwank]]", variations such as "Ameriteen", "Amerileft" and "Ameriright/Ameright" have sprung up to describe various demographics of U.S. posters and political fields.
 **[[alternate history:Uninvadable super-duper Switzerland|Impenetrable Switzerland]]** - Switzerland is under the protection of a magic spell and thus, cannot be invaded.
@@ Line 215: / Line 210: @@
 **Al-Qaeda's Number Three**: Due to the US Army consistently having claimed to have killed "Al-Qaeda's Number Three" man approximately 700 times in a row. Although this is obviously due to new people taking over the role, this has led to a meme that Al-Qaeda's Number Three is a Captain Scarlet-style invincible man.
-**The Korean War Never Ended**: As the BBC and other news sources feel the need to mention the fact that the Korean war technically never ended because there was an armistice not a treaty in every single article about it (annoying MacCauley), it is customary to mention this fact whenever Korea is mentioned. Leo also had a similar gag where he would keep stating that Tycho Brahe got his moose drunk and then it fell down the stairs (but changing to a different animal each time).
+**The Korean War Never Ended**: As the BBC and other news sources feel the need to mention the fact that the Korean war technically never ended because there was an armistice not a treaty in every single article about it (annoying [[MacCauley]]), it is customary to mention this fact whenever Korea is mentioned. Leo also had a similar gag where he would keep stating that Tycho Brahe got his moose drunk and then it fell down the stairs (but changing to a different animal each time).
 **"[[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=191640|Could Indian Impload one day]]"**: Minor meme. Based on the eponymous, poor-grammar, bizarre anti-India rant by [[Death]] that got him banned in April 2011. Variations/mutations on the meme include saying to others (in a mock-threatening way) that they should watch out, or else they might impload one day...
@@ Line 231: / Line 226: @@
 **[[The Colour Scheme War]]**: An [[ah.com conflicts|AH.com civil war]] that //almost// errupted due to arguments among the [[Mappist Cabal]] over the merit of various [[resources:map colour schemes]] and the results of a narrow vote on what to colour non-communist Russia on AH maps - green or gold or something else entirely ? Three main ideological factions arose from the conflict, becoming mini-memes in and of themselves: The [[Greensheviks]] (pro-Green Russia), the [[Goldilocks]] (pro-Gold Russia) and the [[Map Marauders]] (anarchistic, Russia to be coloured according one's preferences). Yeah, a lot of the humour was based on [[pods:Russian Civil War]] analogies... The Colour Scheme War has recently been picked up as a potential story arc for [[stories:AH.com Enterprise|the revived AH.com series]].
-**2011, the First Year of the ASB**: The year [[offtopic:2011]] has had events so unlikely that it has been dubbed the Year of the ASB. This has gotten somewhat annoying, and sometimes results in the speaker being slapped [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/attachment.php?attachmentid=155326&d=1317449313|with a frozen trout]].
+**2011, the First Year of the ASB**: The year [[2011]] has had events so unlikely that it has been dubbed the Year of the ASB. This has gotten somewhat annoying, and sometimes results in the speaker being slapped [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/attachments/155326/|with a frozen trout]].
 **2012, the Second Year of the ASB**: The year 2012 is also known as the Year of the Future History Cliche, because it has had technology develop that was future history cliches, such as hydrogen leaves, artificial life, Indian satellites, asteroid mining, rogue geoengineering, revamping the USA's states, and all that jazz.
@@ Line 237: / Line 232: @@
 **2013, the Third Year of the ASB**: The year 2013 is also known as the Year that Reality Disintegrated, because events that would be swiftly sent to ASB and laughed mercilessly at there, happened in that year, like the Pope resigning for no reason whatsoever, the KKK and the Crips teaming up to stop a racist rally with non-violence, meteorites hitting Russia, a resurgence of paganism in Britain and Ireland, ecological conservatism in Georgia and same-sex marriage in Utah.
-**2014: The Fourth Year of the ASB** or **2014 : The Year when Time Went Backwards**: The madness never stops... Panasonic announces a robot suit for sale at 5,000 US dollars and a Congressperson writes his resignation letter in Klingon, Ukraine starts doing a small-scale reenactment of the plot of a rejected //Call of Duty// game, while Russia starts a reenactment of Modern Warfare. Crimea becomes independent (for one day), an Orthodox Synod would be gathered in Constantinople, and Venetians (supposedly) vote for the rebirth of the Most Serene Republic of Venice along with Scottish and Catalan referundums on independence.
+**2014: The Fourth Year of the ASB** or **2014 : The Year when Time Went Backwards**: The madness never stops... Panasonic announces a robot suit for sale at 5,000 US dollars and a Congressperson writes his resignation letter in Klingon, Ukraine starts doing a small-scale reenactment of the plot of a rejected //Call of Duty// game, while Russia starts a reenactment of //Modern Warfare//. Crimea becomes independent (for one day), an Orthodox Synod would be gathered in Constantinople, and Venetians (supposedly) vote for the rebirth of the Most Serene Republic of Venice along with Scottish and Catalan referendums on independence.
-**All Mac's Favourite Shows Get Cancelled**: [[offtopic:MacCaulay]] is known for going on epic rants about his favourite TV shows being cancelled by daft American TV executives (starting with Stargate Universe). This has led to the idea that TV executives deliberately spy on him to find out which shows he likes so they can cancel them.
+**All Mac's Favourite Shows Get Cancelled**: [[MacCaulay]] is known for going on epic rants about his favourite TV shows being cancelled by daft American TV executives (starting with //Stargate Universe//). This has led to the idea that TV executives deliberately spy on him to find out which shows he likes so they can cancel them.
-**[[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/attachment.php?attachmentid=148805&d=1312072437|China]] Need Not [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/attachment.php?attachmentid=148808&d=1312073008|Throwing Banana]]**: Anyone who says otherwise is a "western propogenda fucker", spreading anti-Chinese "propoganda". Just ask [[kahing]].
+**[[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/attachments/148805/|China]] Need Not [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/attachments/148808/|Throwing Banana]]**: Anyone who says otherwise is a "western propogenda fucker", spreading anti-Chinese "propoganda". Just ask [[kahing]].
 **Sealion TV**: The moniker bestowed upon Spike TV's Alternate History television show after their first episode depicted a pathetically ASB German victory in WWII followed by Nazi occupation of the United States.
@@ Line 249: / Line 244: @@
 **Colonel Gaddafi's sons all have superpowers**: According to [[Emperor Qianlong]], anyway. For example, Khamis Gaddafi has the power of resurrection, judging by the fact his death has been reported approximately 500 times during the Libyan Civil War.
-**Woodrow Wilson is the root of all evil**: Based on Wilson being a hate figure on AH.com, largely because of his extreme racism (segregating bits of the US armed forces that hadn't ever actually been segregated before) and authoritarianism (he wanted the Sedition Act to be permanent!) and hypocritical colonialism (the Balkans can be free, but the Mexicans and Vietnamese need whitey to show them how it's done) and destruction of the American Socialist Party (that's a no-no since the site is rather lefty) and actions at Versailles leading to WW2 (do you get the picture?), and defeating Theodore FUCKING Roosevelt in an election (to some this is the most unacceptable) has led to Wilson being blamed for everything that went wrong in history, especially if it happened centuries before his birth. He's essentially the anti-Theodore Roosevelt.
+**[[Woodrow Wilson]] is the root of all evil**: Based on Wilson being a hate figure on AH.com, largely because of his extreme racism (segregating bits of the US armed forces that hadn't ever actually been segregated before) and authoritarianism (he wanted the Sedition Act to be permanent!) and hypocritical colonialism (the Balkans can be free, but the Mexicans and Vietnamese need whitey to show them how it's done) and destruction of the American Socialist Party (that's a no-no since the site is rather lefty) and actions at Versailles leading to WW2 (do you get the picture?), and defeating Theodore FUCKING Roosevelt in an election (to some this is the most unacceptable) has led to Wilson being blamed for everything that went wrong in history, especially if it happened centuries before his birth. He's essentially the anti-[[Theodore Roosevelt]].
 More recently Wilson has shared this role with Christopher Columbus, who besides his actual nastiness turns out to also be responsible for causing a change in global climate that began 200 years before he was born.
-**Frisian Islands**: Based off [[http://alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=205591|an insane idea for an alternate D-Day landing]], rivalling Seelowe in ASBness developed by david green. Has since become a stock response to other insane WW2 scenarios ("Germany builds a fleet of carriers befor ehte war? Why don't they just tow the Frisian Islands tot he mid-Atlantic?").
+**Frisian Islands**: Based off [[http://alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=205591|an insane idea for an alternate D-Day landing]], rivalling Seelöwe in ASBness developed by david green. Has since become a stock response to other insane WW2 scenarios ("Germany builds a fleet of carriers before hte war? Why don't they just tow the Frisian Islands to the mid-Atlantic?").
-**Tony Abbott Responded By Calling For A Federal Election**: Suggested by ColeMercury after a series of events where Australia's conservative Liberal/National Coalition opposition leader, Tony Abbott, non sequiturishly called for a federal election in response to any incident no matter how unrelated. Therefore on AH.com, any news story about anything may prompt Abbott to call for a federal election. A similar joke is North Korea regarding absolutely anything as "a declaration of war".
+**Tony Abbott Responded By Calling For A Federal Election**: Suggested by [[ColeMercury]] after a series of events where Australia's conservative Liberal/National Coalition opposition leader, Tony Abbott, non sequiturishly called for a federal election in response to any incident no matter how unrelated. Therefore on AH.com, any news story about anything may prompt Abbott to call for a federal election. A similar joke is North Korea regarding absolutely anything as "a declaration of war".
 **African Rebel Movements**: Originally observed by Susano but tends to show up whenever they become topical again. All African rebel movements seem to be made of a combination of the same few buzzwords to form a French acronym: the words used include "National", "Union"/"Universal", "Restoration", "Salvation", "Democracy", "Popular"/"People's", "State", "Committee", "Liberation", "Front" and so on.
-**(By the way,) The Olympics Are On This Year**: 2012 running joke (obviously) based on how [[offtopic:the BBC]] and other British media have developed a non sequiturish habit of mentioning the upcoming London Olympics in practically every sentence. For example "In world news tonight, in Syria, President Bashar al-Assad remained defiant as his troops continued to bombard the rebel city of Homs, and also, the Olympics are on this year". Often combined with Tony Abbott calling for a federal election (see above).
+**(By the way,) The Olympics Are On This Year**: 2012 running joke (obviously) based on how [[the BBC]] and other British media have developed a non sequiturish habit of mentioning the upcoming London Olympics in practically every sentence. For example "In world news tonight, in Syria, President Bashar al-Assad remained defiant as his troops continued to bombard the rebel city of Homs, and also, the Olympics are on this year". Often combined with Tony Abbott calling for a federal election (see above).
-**Two warm-water ports ! And a transcontinental railroad to connect them ! And Alsace-Lorraine !**: A list of territorial demands, expanding on "a warm-water port", that can be applied to virtually any state (except France, obviously).  First used in reference to [[New Mexico]] by [[Kaiphranos]], discussing a [[http://alternatehistory.com/discussion/showpost.php?p=6015863&postcount=5268|map]] by Beedok; has since [[http://alternatehistory.com/discussion/showpost.php?p=6355780&postcount=13|appeared]] for [[Austria]], regarding the rumored accession of the [[greece|Greek]] island of Ikaria.
+**[[masteraccount]] references, particularly to his threads.** Masteraccount was a troll with a cult following known for his obsession with Sonic the Hedgehog and bizarre and/or apocalyptic ASB scenarios.
+Some common references include (but are not limited to): What if Peoples blood becoming strawberry syrup, earth exploding in 1982, Sonic the Hedgehog in 1926, etc. Masteraccount's escapades were one of the reasons why Ian officially forbade the posting of cruel and pointless scenarios in the ASB forum. (Though this rule has been in place since the site's existence, so it was technically nothing new.)
+**Two warm-water ports ! And a transcontinental railroad to connect them ! And Alsace-Lorraine !**: A list of territorial demands, expanding on "a warm-water port", that can be applied to virtually any state (except France, obviously).  First used in reference to [[New Mexico]] by [[Kaiphranos]], discussing a [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/threads/1/post-6015863|map]] by Beedok; has since [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/threads/1/post-6355780|appeared]] for [[Austria]], regarding the rumored accession of the [[greece|Greek]] island of Ikaria.
-**Everyone loves Brian Schweitzer**: Due to the popularity of current Governor of Montana Brian Schweitzer both in his own right with AH.com's Amerileft and with the writers of American political timelines in the FH forum, this has led to the idea that most or all of AH.com's members are madly in love with Schweitzer and act like creepy stalkers with a crush towards him.
+**Everyone loves Brian Schweitzer**: Due to the popularity of current Governor of [[Montana]] Brian Schweitzer both in his own right with AH.com's Amerileft and with the writers of American political timelines in the FH forum, this has led to the idea that most or all of AH.com's members are madly in love with Schweitzer and act like creepy stalkers with a crush towards him.
 **The Empire of Kongo Strikes Again**: The flag of the Kongo Empire, a red X on a white background, looks rather like the 'image not found' symbol from Internet Explorer, so it is customary to make some reference to the Kongo Empire when an image linked to by somebody fails to load.
-**The Armoured Dinner Jacket**:  The current loud-mouthed President of Iran, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, whose difficult-to-pronounce-and-say name is often simply shortened to the similar-looking phrase "Armo(u)red Dinner Jacket".  This is believed to have been coined by [[offtopic:MrP]] and [[offtopic:P Minor]] in //[[stories:Englishman]]//, but a similar joke was apparently independently conceived by //The Spectator// a few months later (which referred to him as 'President I'm-in-a-dinner-jacket').
+**The Armoured Dinner Jacket**:  The current loud-mouthed President of Iran, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, whose difficult-to-pronounce-and-say name is often simply shortened to the similar-looking phrase "Armo(u)red Dinner Jacket".  This is believed to have been coined by [[MrP]] and [[P Minor]] in //[[stories:Englishman]]//, but a similar joke was apparently independently conceived by //The Spectator// a few months later (which referred to him as 'President I'm-in-a-dinner-jacket').
-**[[offtopic:Abhakhazia]] and [[offtopic:Turquoise Blue]] Are Married**: Pointed out by [[offtopic:Thande]], it seems that Abhakhazia and Turquoise Blue are a young married couple in which the dominating progressive wife (Turquoise Blue) picks on the conservative henpecked husband (Abhakhazia). Neither openly deny this claim, but Abhakhazia always says whenever it is brought up that Thande, is in fact in a similar relationship with Elle-jay. Of course, the meme's dead now.
+**[[Abhakhazia]] and [[Turquoise Blue]] Are Married**: Pointed out by [[Thande]], it seems that Abhakhazia and Turquoise Blue are a young married couple in which the dominating progressive wife (Turquoise Blue) picks on the conservative henpecked husband (Abhakhazia). Neither openly deny this claim, but Abhakhazia always says whenever it is brought up that Thande, is in fact in a similar relationship with [[Elle-jay]]. Of course, the meme's dead now.
-On a related note, **[[offtopic:Turquoise Blue]] and [[offtopic:transparent_blue|Transparent Blue]] Are Siblings.**
+On a related note, **[[Turquoise Blue]] and [[transparent_blue|Transparent Blue]] Are Siblings.**
 **[[Politics in the Wrong Place]]**
-**Uber-Balkans Colonize Africa**:  Originating in the OOC thread for the [[http://alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=256461|Scramble For Africa]] nation game. [[offtopic:Hetalia]] originally claimed Serbia, but was miffed when he was not allowed to [[http://alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=256461&page=4|annex surrounding nations]] and thus give him access to the Mediterranean. Without a sea, he claimed, the "imminent powerhouse" of Serbia could never conquer lands in Africa. Later claimed Greece instead, since it had a sea already.
+**Uber-Balkans Colonize Africa**:  Originating in the OOC thread for the [[http://alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=256461|Scramble For Africa]] nation game. [[Hetalia]] originally claimed Serbia, but was miffed when he was not allowed to [[http://alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=256461&page=4|annex surrounding nations]] and thus give him access to the Mediterranean. Without a sea, he claimed, the "imminent powerhouse" of Serbia could never conquer lands in Africa. Later claimed Greece instead, since it had a sea already.
 **[[Swiftian Fae Monarchism]]**: [[Orville_third]] once started a thread regarding an article on an internet rumor that Nicholas Cage is a vampire, offhandedly mentioning his theory that Taylor Swift is a fairy princess. The thread quickly diverted to the latter topic. Since then, it has not only popped up regarding Orville_third's comments, but [[King Thomas]] has joined in, and it even shows up during unrelated threads.
-**[[underboard|The Underboard]]**: Prior to the end of the world in December 2012, [[Glen]] [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showpost.php?p=6966240&postcount=32|revealed to us]] the terrifying secret behind this mythical eldritch location of the [[New Board]]...
+**[[underboard|The Underboard]]**: Prior to the end of the world in December 2012, [[Glen]] [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/threads/1/post-6966240|revealed to us]] the terrifying secret behind this mythical eldritch location of the [[New Board]]...
 **Richard Nixon**: There are a variety of running themes related to America's 37th president. Firstly, AH.com is home to more people than usual who will defend his overall record (though by no means everyone) rather than seeing him as entirely defined by Watergate as is common in popular culture, a dissonance which often surprises newer members. Secondly, the fact that Nixon always looks awkward in photos and has some rather surprising ones (like one with Elvis and one where he's levitating) has made him a common target for the "Things that look like AH but aren't" thread. Overall, Nixon comes up in conversations more often than you might think.
-**Gaydiation**: As explained by TheDarkMessiah, the board emits a radioactive substance known as Gaydiation, which slowly turns all over time gayer and gayer, until they are LGBT in some way or form, explaining the board's unusually high ratio of LGBT Members, appears to not work on all members however, as some appear to have a natural resistance to it.
+**Gaydiation**: As explained by [[TheDarkMessiah]], the board emits a radioactive substance known as Gaydiation, which slowly turns all over time gayer and gayer, until they are LGBT in some way or form, explaining the board's unusually high ratio of LGBT Members, appears to not work on all members however, as some appear to have a natural resistance to it.
 **You are "based"**: After Dirk mistyped the word "biased" as "based", people started posting various quips with plentiful puns related to the words "based" and "base", often in unusual or deliberately punny contexts. One of the fuelers of the "based" phenomenon was Dirk himself. This in turn led to the proposed formation of another new meme, that being...
@@ Line 293: / Line 291: @@
 **[[Wehraboo]]**: Became a popular disparaging moniker during early 2014. A paraphrase of the existing slang term [[http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Weeaboo|Weeaboo]] (i.e. mindless admirer of all things Japanese and anime - but only the romanticised stuff, not the real thing), a Wehraboo is a history or alternate history fan (including an AH.commer) that is firmly entrenched in the belief that Nazi Germany's Wehrmacht was the best military in history, without a single flaw. Effectively, a Wehraboo is any obsessive Wehrmacht fanboy/fangirl who doesn't like historical facts getting in the way of his militaristic fantasies. While not necessarily, many Wehraboos can become Nazi apologists (which is obviously frowned upon on AH.com and gets you banned in short order). The cliché of [[alternate history:German Techwank]] can be a common fetish for many Wehraboos. A popular pastime of Wehraboos is the [[http://i.imgur.com/GMdQmBQ.png|Wehrabingo]]. A rarer variation of Wehraboo is the so-called "Kaiserboo", who has a similar obsession with the supposed infallibility of Imperial Germany's military.
-**Computer Strategy Game Geopolitics:** The apparent belief of some more obscure members of the site (including the ever-dependable [[n00bs]]) that current international geopolitics is basically just a larger version of grand strategy or real time strategy computer games. (In truth, AH.com's long-lasting obsession with both genres might have something to do with it.) This leads to peculiar statements that show up //shockingly often// even in Political Chat threads. [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=346714|One example]] out of many... Perhaps the commonest cliché of these beliefs is the notion that a rebellious new nation or separatist/insurgent group "needs to hold territory for a certain amount of time" and then will become //somehow// automatically approved and recognised by the rest of the world. (Your bet as to "Why ?" is as good as our's. It might have something to do with the popular contemporary notion of "humans are all apathetic" being taken to its logical extreme.)
+**Computer Strategy Game Geopolitics:** The apparent belief of some more obscure members of the site (including the ever-dependable [[n00bs]]) that current international geopolitics is basically just a larger version of grand strategy or real time strategy computer games. (In truth, AH.com's long-lasting obsession with both genres might have something to do with it.) This leads to peculiar statements that show up //shockingly often// even in Political Chat threads. [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?t=346714|One example]] out of many... Perhaps the commonest cliché of these beliefs is the notion that a rebellious new nation or separatist/insurgent group "needs to hold territory for a certain amount of time" and then will become //somehow// automatically approved and recognised by the rest of the world. (Your bet as to "Why?" is as good as our's. It might have something to do with the popular contemporary notion of "humans are all apathetic" being taken to its logical extreme.)
-**This post requires an AH.com [NAME OF PRECIOUS METAL] Account to view:** [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?p=10479555#post10479555|Started by]] [[xnm|Richard Harrow]] in Sabot Cat's Social Thread, spoofing the premium account nature of a lot of sites on the Internet, including many bigger discussion forums. [[nlspeed]] wasn't particularly satisfied by this joke, deeming it old and bearded. [[CannedTech]] proposed that curious AH.commers should pay for these account viewing fees by Dogecoin - because an AH site needs it's own made-up equivalent of Bitcoin, of course !
+**This post requires an AH.com [NAME OF PRECIOUS METAL] Account to view:** [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/threads/1/post-10479555|Started by]] [[xnm|Richard Harrow]] in Sabot Cat's Social Thread, spoofing the premium account nature of a lot of sites on the Internet, including many bigger discussion forums. [[nlspeed]] wasn't particularly satisfied by this joke, deeming it old and bearded. [[CannedTech]] proposed that curious AH.commers should pay for these account viewing fees by Dogecoin - because an AH site needs it's own made-up equivalent of Bitcoin, of course!
-**"[[Dogs of Flanders]]", Lord Roem's (virtual) band:** A running joke about [[Lord Roem]] that started in the fourth [[how do you look|How do you look ?]] thread after he posted some photos of him and his friends on a moody-looking sea coast with overcast weather, and joked about it being a good background for an album cover. [[Georgepatton]] was quick to embrace this, and the band "Dogs of Flanders" [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?p=8245202#post8245202|was born]]. Ever since then, Dogs of Flanders had already published [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/discussion/showthread.php?p=10524688#post10524688|a second album]].
+**"[[Dogs of Flanders]]", Lord Roem's (virtual) band:** A running joke about [[Lord Roem]] that started in the fourth [[how do you look|How do you look ?]] thread after he posted some photos of him and his friends on a moody-looking sea coast with overcast weather, and joked about it being a good background for an album cover. [[Georgepatton]] was quick to embrace this, and the band "Dogs of Flanders" [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/threads/1/post-8245202|was born]]. Ever since then, Dogs of Flanders had already published [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/threads/1/post-10524688|a second album]].
 **Technocracy is fascism for nerds:** The meme developed and reoccured in a series of threads in PolChat from early 2015, in which board members theoretically discussed technocracy's feasibility and effectiveness as a real world political regime. While the consensus was that technocracy would see little success and effectiveness in any realistic scale, the meme was embraced by quite a few AH.commers with a wry sense of humour.
 **Anime jokes and gifs:** Started originally as an import from sites such as Reddit and 4chan. However, over time, the Anime/Manga Thread, and AH.com overall, has moved to developing a culture of its' own, a notable one being the posting of gifs, new anime releases, and especially 4chan pictures, like [[http://i.imgur.com/XBOaB.png|this]] and [[http://i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/448/058/ef9.jpg|this.]]
+**"It's not just a timeline, it's a state of mind...":** A lesser-used jokey idiom, applied by particular people to timelines they really like, find engaging, well done, etc. Basically a shorthand for "I think this timeline is awesome !". Something of a spiritual successor to the old joke about MrP's WWI timeline being so good it breaks down the laws of reality. Some of the timelines that have gained the "...it's a state of mind..." compliment include //**[[timelines:Lands of Red and Gold]]**//, //**[[timelines:Male Rising]]**// or //**[[timelines:The Land of Sad Songs]]**//.
 **"We must build a...":** [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/threads/why-must-we-build-a-canal.404941/|Odd little meme]] that surfaced for a short while in the first few weeks after the board started using the XenForo software as its new base. It appeared purely in the form of thread tags, which were a wholly new feature in board software at that point. Unfortunately, adding of tags was not restricted at first, leading to several less mature or cheekier members of the board abusing this to add said meme to many threads. Its original form was "We must build a canal" and apparently was a nod to an earlier AH.com running gag or some running gag already established in the //A Song of Ice and Fire//<nowiki>/</nowiki>//Game of Thrones// fandom on the board. The admin quickly got fed up with the spamming of this tag in far too many unrelated threads, and made software adjustments to discourage tag spamming (limiting the creation of new tags to a thread's creator). Subsequent renditions or variations of the meme were mostly parodic in nature, such as "We must not build a canal...", "We must build a cannoli..." or "We must build a database...".
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 **"Bellowing Antropoids" and "Britain is Fat/VAT":** Mostly [[the politibrits|politbrit]] memes that appeared after the conclusion of the controversial "Brexit" referendum in the UK. Shortly after their spread in Political Chat, they became so memetic that they quickly lost any serious connotations they might have had first, and devolved into purely sarcastic usage by all involved.
-**Top Kekkonen:** Charming meme devised by [[offtopic:DrakonFin]] by combining the already established Internet expression "top kek" (a belly laugh, a "super-<nowiki>LOL</nowiki>") with a photo of a chuckling Urho Kekkonen, Finland's famous Cold War era president. The caption added to the photo was, naturally, "Top Kekkonen". Originally intended [[http://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/threads/vladimir-zhirinovsky-tells-americans-to-vote-for-trump-or-face-nuclear-war.400589/page-3#post-13356778|as a one-off joke]] in a thread discussing Putin's politics towards Finland and other neighbours of Russia, it developed something of a cult following in PolChat and was still being used even several months later. Effectivelly became the indigenous AH.com version of the "top kek" shorthand.
+**Top Kekkonen:** Charming meme devised by [[DrakonFin]] by combining the already established Internet expression "top kek" (a belly laugh, a "super-<nowiki>LOL</nowiki>") with a photo of a chuckling Urho Kekkonen, Finland's famous Cold War era president. The caption added to the photo was, naturally, "Top Kekkonen". Originally intended as a one-off joke in a thread discussing Putin's politics towards Finland and other neighbours of Russia, it developed something of a cult following in PolChat and was still being used even several months later. Effectivelly became the indigenous AH.com version of the "top kek" shorthand.
+**"Their account surely got hacked/doxxed !":** Many younger AH.commers who joined in the latter 2010s seem to have a tendency to blame virtually every kick or ban of anyone who eventually exposed themselves as a racist/troll/etc. to be the result of "his/her account getting hacked", "getting doxxed", and so on.  Admittedly, once or twice is a possibility not to be dismissed. But when tens of people eventually reveal themselves as unpleasant individuals who severely break the board's rules (time and time again, until they're banned), the idea that they're merely the products of "hacked accounts" by some mean-spirited anonymous persons becomes... dubious, at best.
+**[[offtopic:Talwar]] lives in a Canadian adaptation of //The Office//:** The many peculiar daily annoyances and woes Talwar experiences at work, when dealing with his superiors and underlings, has prompted several people (especially fellow Canadian [[offtopic:RedBaron223]]) to note that it sounds like he exists within the confines of a somewhat bleak comedy-drama sitcom.
+**The Pemon people of Venezuela are badass archers who can defeat anyone:** In the otherwise mostly sad thread on developments in Venezuela during its long-lasting 2010s crisis, a short-lived memetic joke got started after [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/threads/venezuela-thread.363264/page-201#post-18504223|a report appeared]] on the 22nd February 2019 about the native Pemon minority of Venezuela. The Pemon locals single-handedly arrested some police and army employees of the regime, who were attacking and harassing them. A photo found on the Internet, showing the situation after the arrest and Pemon victory, showed members of the Maduro regime police surrendered, waiting in an outdoor tent. Local Pemon citizens stood nearby, guarding them. The sole armed Pemon seen in the photo [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/threads/venezuela-thread.363264/page-202#post-18506236|carried a... native bow]]. This led to some AH.commers joking for a while that the downtrodden natives are badass enough to have beaten the gun-toting cops and militias //with only bows and arrows//. Predictably, a lot of comparisons to the oldest //Civilization// games, where spearmen were known to beat tanks and helicopters due to bugs or balacing issues, promptly ensued. Though the actual situation of the Pemon [[https://www.alternatehistory.com/forum/threads/venezuela-thread.363264/page-233#post-18584655|wasn't cheery at all]], their feat of resisting harassment by regime personnel and even arresting them on their own (without bothering to brag about their weaponry in the photos) earned them the admiration of AH.commers frequenting the Venezuela thread. Given the all-around awful developments in Venezuela at the time, and even regime-loyal cops and soldiers defecting not only out of disgust, but //because they admitted to running out of ammo//, the AH.com speculation that the shrinking ammo supplies could make Pemon bows suddenly deadlier than guns seemed to have gained a new lease of life !
+**Petike - part MacGyver, part Jason Bourne ?:** Petike got back into his old archery and bowyery hobby during the summer of 2019. He showed off photos of his first-ever hand-built, entirely non-metal crossbow in the social thread, commenting humbly "I was bored over the weekend, so I made this...". The showcase prompted comments such as General Tirpitz's "//Compared to bored General Tirpitz, bored Petike is much more productive.//" and Baron Bizzare's "//Note to Self: Do not give Petike plutonium when he's bored.//". Be warned, Petike announced plans to make a lever-action "latchet crossbow" later that summer, again with using only scrap materials. Best head for the hills, ladies and gents ! (Currently, there is no proof that  Petike played the MacGyver theme song as BGM while assembling his contraption of doom.)
+**"Put videos under a spoiler, please !":** Minor meme based on actually reasonable netiquette, that originated in several fast-paced PolChat discussion threads where people were posting a lot of videos, frequently, rather than just every now and then. This resulted in the loading times and loads in some people's browsers causing issues. As a result of the issue, Ian the Admin asked everyone politely but firmly to please put all shared videos in those discussion threds under a spouler. Though this issue kept recurring from time to time by people who forgot the rule, others were quick to remind them to... "Put videos under a spoiler, please !".
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