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offtopic:exciting_trailer

Something is rotten in the state of Equestria. Her Heavenly Majesty Princess Celestia slowly wastes away to a sinister curse, and eldritch cults strike from the shadows. Equestria needs heroes in these dark times… heroes like YOU!

Come one, come all, to the FRIENDSHIP AND ADVENTURES role-playing campaign in Shared Worlds! Dangerous quests and the grim specter of real life have thinned the ranks of our fellowship, so we're always on the lookout for new faces! WITNESS…!

GRATUITOUS VIOLENCE!

Mjölna somehow manages to scream through a mouthful of hammer as she lays into the enemy, her flaming sledge whirling like a baton. An unfortunate cultist intercepts it with his head, and with a terrible crunching sound, that head is ripped loose and flung through the air, to lie smoldering several yards off.

HAMMY SPEECHES!

“Woe to you, oh followers of false gods! The Daughter of Death herself stalks among you! Flee, flee before Undying Vengeance, the Pale Slayer, the Bane of the Unrighteous! Flee for your miserable lives!”

ADORABLE FILLY BLACKMAIL!

Spanner lifts Bluebell up, who took this as a cue to shine big, soulful eyes at the blacksmith.

“Please sir?” she asks pleadingly.

“Poor orphan filly? A likely story,” grunts the blacksmith pony as Spanner holds Bluebell up to his face. “I've never…” He trails off, staring at Bluebell for a moment, then shakes his head. “Gah! All right, fine, you little swindlers. I'll do it for ten bits…”

HOOKER PONIES!

Ludere cleared his throat. “I'm fine, actually. I am quite capable of amusing myself without your assistance.” He then attempted to walk away from her without making his escape appear too desperate.

The orange mare strolls casually along with him, somehow contriving to bump her flank against his every other step. “I bet you are capable,” she says with a wink. “It's better with two, you know.”

“That's not what I meant,” Ludere said irritably.

MOBSTERS!

“I have limited one-time offer. Order now in next five seconds, and enjoy not-perforated trachea. Deal? Da? Da?”

DARING ESCAPES!

Arctic throws the cell door open and sprints towards the lobby, where his compatriots are bargaining for his freedom. Upon the inevitable confrontation with the cops, Arctic shouts, “Para o imperador!” and tries to charge through to the door.

AND MUCH MORE, like explosions, zomponies, and yodelers! But if we encounter exploding zompony yodelers, we'll need all the help we can get!

So feel free everypony to poke into the OOC thread and sign up! Friendship and Adventures await!

offtopic/exciting_trailer.txt · Last modified: 2019/03/29 15:13 by 127.0.0.1

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