You Gotta Have Hart: A Different 1988 and Beyond
- Thread starter Meyer London
- Start date
Novice campaigner making a mistake. He's a blunt guy and I think it's realm of possibility for him to slip. Don't worry he'll clean up.
In real life he was forced into rehab and it didn't work, ultimately resulting in his death by overdose in '91. Difference is he came to the decision himself due to the death of a friend.
Gentleman Biaggi
Banned
Yeah, Iaccoca's gonna be quite important in this TL
Now if you'll excuse me, @Meyer London's gonna strangle me for saying something that won't come up until, oh, I'd say 2019.
Gentleman Biaggi
Banned
You may laugh now, but JEB!'s gonna become president in a 50-state landslide against Donald Trump in 2000, before slaying space aliens thanks to the help of pocket turtles, Lyndon LaRouche, every La Follette ever, and Evan McMullin.
Sports Update
Gentleman Biaggi
Banned
June 6th, 1987
Excerpt of a speech given by Joe Biden regarding his potential candidacy for President of the United States in 1988.
“In the last few months, I’ve seen candidates from all over the political spectrum enter the race to take back the White House for the Democrats. Each and every demographic or wing of the party seems to have a candidate they are already backing.
This means, unfortunately, that there is no room for me in the race for the Democratic nomination in 1988.
After weeks of careful consideration, I have come to the conclusion that I would be of much greater use to my constituents in Delaware as well as the people of the United States remaining in the Senate and working with whoever wins the White House for the Democrats in 1988.
At this time, I do not plan to endorse anyone in the race. Once the race takes shape over the coming year I will consider the options and make a decision.
However, I would be remiss if I did not stress the feeling of dread I feel when I read that Lee Iacocca picked on Senator Simon and called him names. This is not the way to capture the hearts and minds of the people of this great country. I personally know Senator Simon and can attest that he is one of the kindest people working in Washington D.C.
If you’re listening, Mr. Iacocca, know this - name calling and insults are not welcome in the Democratic Party in 1987.”
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
June 7th, 1987
A look at the sports page
In the NBA
The Boston Celtics took the third game of the NBA Finals tonight, staving off a possible three games to zero hole. After losing the first two games by thirteen and nineteen respectively, Boston held on to take the third game 109-103. The surprising hero of the game for the Celtics was backup center Greg Kite, who had seen less than five minutes in each of the previous two games.
Kite, who was forced into action with starter Robert Parish marred in foul trouble early in the first quarter. Kite played twenty solid minutes, grabbing nine rebounds and blocking a shot from Magic Johnson, who scored thirty two points, which led the Lakers.
Larry Bird put up thirty for the Celtics and Kevin McHale added twenty one points and ten rebounds.
Bold words came from Bird after the game when he said that “this was the most important game of the series for us. If we lost, it might have been tough to get up for Game Four. Now it’s going to be easy.”
The series stays in Boston two nights from now for the pivotal fourth game of the series.
In the MLB
Two frontrunners have emerged in the respective leagues of Major League Baseball - in the National League, there’s the St. Louis Cardinals, and in the AL, there is the Toronto Blue Jays.
The Cardinals, led by Ozzie “The Wizard” Smith, have jumped to an early 33-20 record that has experts believing that they could dominate the NL for the duration of the season, leading to their second World Series appearance in three years. Starter Greg Matthews leads the pitching rotation, which to this point have remained steady.
The upstart Blue Jays sit identical to the Cardinals at 33-20 this season. They are led by left fielder George Bell, an early favorite for Most Valuable Player. They will have the tougher path to glory, however, as they share a division with Detroit, Milwaukee and the New York Yankees, who all look like playoff contenders at this moment.
The 28-28 Seattle Mariners also make the news for taking Ken Griffey Jr. with the first pick in this years amateur draft. Griffey Jr., whose father is a utility player for the Atlanta Braves, will attempt to revive a franchise who has not made the playoffs once in their ten years of existence. The most victories the Mariners have recorded in a single season is 76; maybe Ken Griffey Jr. can be the player that takes Seattle to the postseason promised land.
In the NFL
Much of the National Football League is currently silent, quiet in the slumber of the offseason. However, not everybody is asleep during the down time.
The NFL Players Association is currently at odds with the league regarding the rights of players to leave their respective teams in free agency. There is yet to be a compromise made between the two sides.
In playing news, a minor quarterback controversy is arising in Tampa Bay. No. 1 pick Vinny Testaverde is competing against veteran journeyman Steve DeBerg. Though the Buccaneers don’t look to compete this season, but it will be intriguing to see if Testaverde is given a chance to start early in his promising career.
Excerpt of a speech given by Joe Biden regarding his potential candidacy for President of the United States in 1988.
“In the last few months, I’ve seen candidates from all over the political spectrum enter the race to take back the White House for the Democrats. Each and every demographic or wing of the party seems to have a candidate they are already backing.
This means, unfortunately, that there is no room for me in the race for the Democratic nomination in 1988.
After weeks of careful consideration, I have come to the conclusion that I would be of much greater use to my constituents in Delaware as well as the people of the United States remaining in the Senate and working with whoever wins the White House for the Democrats in 1988.
At this time, I do not plan to endorse anyone in the race. Once the race takes shape over the coming year I will consider the options and make a decision.
However, I would be remiss if I did not stress the feeling of dread I feel when I read that Lee Iacocca picked on Senator Simon and called him names. This is not the way to capture the hearts and minds of the people of this great country. I personally know Senator Simon and can attest that he is one of the kindest people working in Washington D.C.
If you’re listening, Mr. Iacocca, know this - name calling and insults are not welcome in the Democratic Party in 1987.”
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
June 7th, 1987
A look at the sports page
In the NBA
The Boston Celtics took the third game of the NBA Finals tonight, staving off a possible three games to zero hole. After losing the first two games by thirteen and nineteen respectively, Boston held on to take the third game 109-103. The surprising hero of the game for the Celtics was backup center Greg Kite, who had seen less than five minutes in each of the previous two games.
Kite, who was forced into action with starter Robert Parish marred in foul trouble early in the first quarter. Kite played twenty solid minutes, grabbing nine rebounds and blocking a shot from Magic Johnson, who scored thirty two points, which led the Lakers.
Larry Bird put up thirty for the Celtics and Kevin McHale added twenty one points and ten rebounds.
Bold words came from Bird after the game when he said that “this was the most important game of the series for us. If we lost, it might have been tough to get up for Game Four. Now it’s going to be easy.”
The series stays in Boston two nights from now for the pivotal fourth game of the series.
In the MLB
Two frontrunners have emerged in the respective leagues of Major League Baseball - in the National League, there’s the St. Louis Cardinals, and in the AL, there is the Toronto Blue Jays.
The Cardinals, led by Ozzie “The Wizard” Smith, have jumped to an early 33-20 record that has experts believing that they could dominate the NL for the duration of the season, leading to their second World Series appearance in three years. Starter Greg Matthews leads the pitching rotation, which to this point have remained steady.
The upstart Blue Jays sit identical to the Cardinals at 33-20 this season. They are led by left fielder George Bell, an early favorite for Most Valuable Player. They will have the tougher path to glory, however, as they share a division with Detroit, Milwaukee and the New York Yankees, who all look like playoff contenders at this moment.
The 28-28 Seattle Mariners also make the news for taking Ken Griffey Jr. with the first pick in this years amateur draft. Griffey Jr., whose father is a utility player for the Atlanta Braves, will attempt to revive a franchise who has not made the playoffs once in their ten years of existence. The most victories the Mariners have recorded in a single season is 76; maybe Ken Griffey Jr. can be the player that takes Seattle to the postseason promised land.
In the NFL
Much of the National Football League is currently silent, quiet in the slumber of the offseason. However, not everybody is asleep during the down time.
The NFL Players Association is currently at odds with the league regarding the rights of players to leave their respective teams in free agency. There is yet to be a compromise made between the two sides.
In playing news, a minor quarterback controversy is arising in Tampa Bay. No. 1 pick Vinny Testaverde is competing against veteran journeyman Steve DeBerg. Though the Buccaneers don’t look to compete this season, but it will be intriguing to see if Testaverde is given a chance to start early in his promising career.
Last edited:
Shame about Biden, but, could he be a running mate for which ever Democrat gets the nomination?
Gentleman Biaggi
Banned
While Baseball is more of something you should ask @Meyer London about, the basketball stuff is OTL. We just lost ideas in between Hart, Iacocca, and Jackson's entries and Lyndon LaRouche shooting up in the polls.
Gentleman Biaggi
Banned
While I cannot speak for London, I have not, I will check it out in the near future!
Fear and Loathing in Hartlandia
June 10th, 1987
An excerpt from an article appearing in the New York Times
Iacocca Fires Back at Biden
It did not take long for the race for the Democratic nomination to heat to a boiling point.
At a campaign rally in New Hampshire yesterday, Lee Iacocca responded to Joe Biden’s comments that “name calling and insults are not welcome in the Democratic Party in 1987”, and he did not hold back.
Iacocca started by reading the quote, which was met by boos from the assembled crowd. This was when the former head of Chrysler attacked Biden’s work on the Senate Judiciary Committee and his fighting spirit.
“Senator Biden, no offense, but a fighter like me will not take an attack from a quitter like you. Senator Biden sits on the Senate Judiciary Committee, and guess what he’s done for you? Nothing.”
Iacocca wrapped up the attack with his strongest words, saying, “You know what, Biden? Attack me when you actually join the race instead of hiding behind your constituents.”
No word has come from any of the other candidates in their appearances regarding Iacocca’s remarks, but one would have to guess that someone will look to punch back at the centrist soon.
It is a highly unusual strategy to blatantly attack members of his own party, but by doing so Iacocca may be able to appear as the no-nonsense businessman in a policy that for the last decade has been regarded by conservatives and independents as weak and ineffective.
So far, the tact seems to have mixed results, as some have shunned Iacocca for harming the party while others have thrown their weight behind the man they see as the savior of the Democratic Party.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
June 13th, 1987
The Vice President was sitting in his office, reading a newspaper article set before him, his brow creasing as the ugly story unfolded before him.
Across the desk sat Howard Baker, who had first seen the story. He eyed Vice President Bush, curious as to how he would react.
The article read as follows.
White House Divided Over Reagan’s Trip to West Germany
An insider source close to the President has told the Washington Post that tensions were high about the text of President Reagan’s speech in West Germany yesterday.
The source, who is in immediate contact with the White House, says that a specific phrase, ‘Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall’, that appeared in the final copy of the speech that President Reagan delivered before a crowd in West Germany split the top officials in the White House nearly in two.
According to the source, Chief of Staff Howard Baker, who has been a trusted official in Reagan’s administration since it’s beginning, said the statement was “extreme”. Also fighting against the use of the phrase was National Security Advisor Colin Powell.
Despite the opposition by key members of the administration, the phrase remained in the speech, and was delivered as written.
This split in the administration could spell trouble for Vice President Bush’s quest for the White House in Nov--”
That was as far as Vice President Bush got before tossing the paper in the trash next to his desk.
“Howard,” he began, “there was less than twenty people in on this decision. It can’t be that too difficult to figure out who sent this to the press.”
“How should we proceed, sir?” Baker asked, sure that Bush had already come to a conclusion in his mind. Bush shook his head.
“That’s not important. What is important,” he said, “is to go out and bring me a list of those twenty people who were in on the speech. Get that list and then we can know for sure.”
Baker stood, his orders clear. He was still curious, however.
“Sir?” he asked. Bush raised an eyebrow, and Baker continued, “Off the record, who do you think it was?”
“Well, let’s just say that Ronny isn’t going to be happy when he finds out his best friend is a leaker.”
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
June 14th, 1987
An excerpt from an article appearing in Rolling Stone Magazine
Days of Panic: Fear and Loathing on Both Sides of the Aisle
Well, here we go again. You all may be thinking, who dug up this old bastard and put his shriveled corpse in front of a typewriter - the answer to that is Jann Wenner, who I can only assume managed to gamble away all his cash riverboat gambling and needed to make some quick money with another sideshow horror. And I am happy to be of assistance.
But, what I said about digging up corpses applies to this race that has snuck upon me like those damn rumors ruined Ed Muskie in ‘72… Who started those again? Ah, those were the days where a slick journalist could slip a story into the first print and voila! The Post had picked it up.
Where were the editors? The watchers? The overseers of justice and the good in this damned country. Off on a swing through some far off desert, some place where the words of giants were buried amongst the dunes, where a man could live.
But, here I go on a tangent, the kind I promised I wouldn’t this time. I’m too old to fall down these mental caverns, I’m not as able to crawl back out as I used to. Leave the Gonzo to the young, that’s what those bastards on the other end of the line have been telling me for hours now.
O Ghost, O Lost, Lost and Gone, O Ghost, come back again.
Back to where the story is, back to the money, back to the rush. Corpses, corpses everywhere. Ghosts of elections past leap into frame every day on the news.
And the reader is thinking, Hunter, you old fool, this is a young election, with that old bastard Reagan out the world is left to the young. No, no, no. They may be new faces but they’re old spirits, old demons possessing senators of today.
Look at Quayle. If you put a blindfold over my eyes, or at least loaded me up on enough acid, you could take me to one of his rallies and I’d think Ronny was running for a third term. That’s not to say that he has half the moxie that our esteemed President has, but the words are the same.
Who knows why. Some people are just too weird to figure, aren’t they?
I think I could hang with this guy… Only way he can actually believe he can take Bush in the primaries is if he’s on as much coke as I am on the usual Tuesday. Seeing this guy makes me think I should run for sheriff again, but after all the broken mailboxes I’ve caused, either accidently or very much on purpose, I don’t think I’d have much of a chance.
In fact, those same armed goons I kept around the Owl Farm on election night all those moons ago are probably the same guys guarding Quayle whenever he appears in White Town, Iowa or White City, New Hampshire. Only the most desperate vagabonds would work for someone so radical and dangerous to the rights of the average man.
And the Democrats, oh, the lovable losers of this storybook, what a divide.
I came awake all of a sudden, jabbering and laughing at my television recently, upon seeing the ghost that had somehow operated and manipulated the wavelengths so he could make his apparition known to me… Gary Hart… my senator, my ‘sort of’ pal.
I had seen that figure long ago, in fact he had been in my car, shooting down State Highway 82, top down, wind blowing. Different times, younger times, faster times. We knew each other… hell, we trusted each other. It was a different time, like I said. Senators could afford to get mixed up with a degenerate junkie and not fear expulsion from his seat.
Then Nixon came along and blew up the whole dynamic.
But I digress. I remember he was talking, talking and talking, seemingly without end. Usually when people rant at me from the passenger seat, it’s me ranting at me, and when it’s not it’s some poor editor begging me to slow down. But this time it was Hart, and he wasn’t telling me to slow down. In fact, he was telling me about his beliefs.
As he spoke more and more, I felt myself nodding along with the rhythm of his speech, more and more in balance with his words. Everything he said was making sense. I couldn’t tell you a thing of it, but what he said made complete sense at the time.
I like the guy, I really do. But I really like Jackson too. He reminds me of the past, and it’s the past I actually dig, not the ironic side of it. Or is it? Damn if I know.
So, here’s the deal. I’m supporting one of these guys, as I don’t have anything better to do and I look forward to yelling at my fellow citizens, now for a reason.
But I’m not set on either side yet. So, Senator Hart, Reverend Jackson, you want an endorsement? You want me to bring all of my esteemed freaks and burnouts with me? Come to Aspen, spend a few hours at Owl Farm, shoot some guns. If I don’t kill you, well, you’ve either gotten me drunk enough to be a crappy shot or I like what you have to say.
What do you say? Come on down, candidates. Woo me like Ed Muskie did all those years ago.
An excerpt from an article appearing in the New York Times
Iacocca Fires Back at Biden
It did not take long for the race for the Democratic nomination to heat to a boiling point.
At a campaign rally in New Hampshire yesterday, Lee Iacocca responded to Joe Biden’s comments that “name calling and insults are not welcome in the Democratic Party in 1987”, and he did not hold back.
Iacocca started by reading the quote, which was met by boos from the assembled crowd. This was when the former head of Chrysler attacked Biden’s work on the Senate Judiciary Committee and his fighting spirit.
“Senator Biden, no offense, but a fighter like me will not take an attack from a quitter like you. Senator Biden sits on the Senate Judiciary Committee, and guess what he’s done for you? Nothing.”
Iacocca wrapped up the attack with his strongest words, saying, “You know what, Biden? Attack me when you actually join the race instead of hiding behind your constituents.”
No word has come from any of the other candidates in their appearances regarding Iacocca’s remarks, but one would have to guess that someone will look to punch back at the centrist soon.
It is a highly unusual strategy to blatantly attack members of his own party, but by doing so Iacocca may be able to appear as the no-nonsense businessman in a policy that for the last decade has been regarded by conservatives and independents as weak and ineffective.
So far, the tact seems to have mixed results, as some have shunned Iacocca for harming the party while others have thrown their weight behind the man they see as the savior of the Democratic Party.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
June 13th, 1987
The Vice President was sitting in his office, reading a newspaper article set before him, his brow creasing as the ugly story unfolded before him.
Across the desk sat Howard Baker, who had first seen the story. He eyed Vice President Bush, curious as to how he would react.
The article read as follows.
White House Divided Over Reagan’s Trip to West Germany
An insider source close to the President has told the Washington Post that tensions were high about the text of President Reagan’s speech in West Germany yesterday.
The source, who is in immediate contact with the White House, says that a specific phrase, ‘Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall’, that appeared in the final copy of the speech that President Reagan delivered before a crowd in West Germany split the top officials in the White House nearly in two.
According to the source, Chief of Staff Howard Baker, who has been a trusted official in Reagan’s administration since it’s beginning, said the statement was “extreme”. Also fighting against the use of the phrase was National Security Advisor Colin Powell.
Despite the opposition by key members of the administration, the phrase remained in the speech, and was delivered as written.
This split in the administration could spell trouble for Vice President Bush’s quest for the White House in Nov--”
That was as far as Vice President Bush got before tossing the paper in the trash next to his desk.
“Howard,” he began, “there was less than twenty people in on this decision. It can’t be that too difficult to figure out who sent this to the press.”
“How should we proceed, sir?” Baker asked, sure that Bush had already come to a conclusion in his mind. Bush shook his head.
“That’s not important. What is important,” he said, “is to go out and bring me a list of those twenty people who were in on the speech. Get that list and then we can know for sure.”
Baker stood, his orders clear. He was still curious, however.
“Sir?” he asked. Bush raised an eyebrow, and Baker continued, “Off the record, who do you think it was?”
“Well, let’s just say that Ronny isn’t going to be happy when he finds out his best friend is a leaker.”
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
June 14th, 1987
An excerpt from an article appearing in Rolling Stone Magazine
Days of Panic: Fear and Loathing on Both Sides of the Aisle
Well, here we go again. You all may be thinking, who dug up this old bastard and put his shriveled corpse in front of a typewriter - the answer to that is Jann Wenner, who I can only assume managed to gamble away all his cash riverboat gambling and needed to make some quick money with another sideshow horror. And I am happy to be of assistance.
But, what I said about digging up corpses applies to this race that has snuck upon me like those damn rumors ruined Ed Muskie in ‘72… Who started those again? Ah, those were the days where a slick journalist could slip a story into the first print and voila! The Post had picked it up.
Where were the editors? The watchers? The overseers of justice and the good in this damned country. Off on a swing through some far off desert, some place where the words of giants were buried amongst the dunes, where a man could live.
But, here I go on a tangent, the kind I promised I wouldn’t this time. I’m too old to fall down these mental caverns, I’m not as able to crawl back out as I used to. Leave the Gonzo to the young, that’s what those bastards on the other end of the line have been telling me for hours now.
O Ghost, O Lost, Lost and Gone, O Ghost, come back again.
Back to where the story is, back to the money, back to the rush. Corpses, corpses everywhere. Ghosts of elections past leap into frame every day on the news.
And the reader is thinking, Hunter, you old fool, this is a young election, with that old bastard Reagan out the world is left to the young. No, no, no. They may be new faces but they’re old spirits, old demons possessing senators of today.
Look at Quayle. If you put a blindfold over my eyes, or at least loaded me up on enough acid, you could take me to one of his rallies and I’d think Ronny was running for a third term. That’s not to say that he has half the moxie that our esteemed President has, but the words are the same.
Who knows why. Some people are just too weird to figure, aren’t they?
I think I could hang with this guy… Only way he can actually believe he can take Bush in the primaries is if he’s on as much coke as I am on the usual Tuesday. Seeing this guy makes me think I should run for sheriff again, but after all the broken mailboxes I’ve caused, either accidently or very much on purpose, I don’t think I’d have much of a chance.
In fact, those same armed goons I kept around the Owl Farm on election night all those moons ago are probably the same guys guarding Quayle whenever he appears in White Town, Iowa or White City, New Hampshire. Only the most desperate vagabonds would work for someone so radical and dangerous to the rights of the average man.
And the Democrats, oh, the lovable losers of this storybook, what a divide.
I came awake all of a sudden, jabbering and laughing at my television recently, upon seeing the ghost that had somehow operated and manipulated the wavelengths so he could make his apparition known to me… Gary Hart… my senator, my ‘sort of’ pal.
I had seen that figure long ago, in fact he had been in my car, shooting down State Highway 82, top down, wind blowing. Different times, younger times, faster times. We knew each other… hell, we trusted each other. It was a different time, like I said. Senators could afford to get mixed up with a degenerate junkie and not fear expulsion from his seat.
Then Nixon came along and blew up the whole dynamic.
But I digress. I remember he was talking, talking and talking, seemingly without end. Usually when people rant at me from the passenger seat, it’s me ranting at me, and when it’s not it’s some poor editor begging me to slow down. But this time it was Hart, and he wasn’t telling me to slow down. In fact, he was telling me about his beliefs.
As he spoke more and more, I felt myself nodding along with the rhythm of his speech, more and more in balance with his words. Everything he said was making sense. I couldn’t tell you a thing of it, but what he said made complete sense at the time.
I like the guy, I really do. But I really like Jackson too. He reminds me of the past, and it’s the past I actually dig, not the ironic side of it. Or is it? Damn if I know.
So, here’s the deal. I’m supporting one of these guys, as I don’t have anything better to do and I look forward to yelling at my fellow citizens, now for a reason.
But I’m not set on either side yet. So, Senator Hart, Reverend Jackson, you want an endorsement? You want me to bring all of my esteemed freaks and burnouts with me? Come to Aspen, spend a few hours at Owl Farm, shoot some guns. If I don’t kill you, well, you’ve either gotten me drunk enough to be a crappy shot or I like what you have to say.
What do you say? Come on down, candidates. Woo me like Ed Muskie did all those years ago.
Last edited:
Aside from typing the wrong year by accident twice, great update. LOL with Hunter S Thompson. Wonder if he was high when he wrote that Rolling
Gentleman Biaggi
Banned
The wrong date thing was the work of me, and yes Thompson was absolutely high when he wrote that
Gentleman Biaggi
Banned
Nope, I didn't even write it, but I know for a fact that HST was high while writing that
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSS HST
also
YAAAAAAAASSSSSS FRIDAY UPDATE
And is the nation's most political general since Al Haig about to get his wings clipped? As a strong supporter of the military's "up and out" role for marginalized Americans I'd like to be sad about that. But where Colin's involved, I'm not. Idle flattery and making Republican tokenism work for you really should only get you so far. Interested to see who will be CJCS if Iraq gets greedy or Noriega gets stroppy though. Technically it was the USAF's "turn" at that point....
also
YAAAAAAAASSSSSS FRIDAY UPDATE
And is the nation's most political general since Al Haig about to get his wings clipped? As a strong supporter of the military's "up and out" role for marginalized Americans I'd like to be sad about that. But where Colin's involved, I'm not. Idle flattery and making Republican tokenism work for you really should only get you so far. Interested to see who will be CJCS if Iraq gets greedy or Noriega gets stroppy though. Technically it was the USAF's "turn" at that point....