WI: Hitler killed by mountain goat at Berghof
- Thread starter Stolengood
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This thread is the best thing ever. But we have goat to stop talking about it.
Stolengood
Banned
Pannus mirabilis!Are we just rattling off puns now?
Maybe once the dust settles we can have a PAN-European commission to commend this courageous capracorn for its contribution to human civilization.
If this barrage of puns is getting to you, don't just sit there and whine about it - get up and grab the problem by the horns!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kevin C. Smith
The new head of the party is Herr C. von Lowe.
Who?
Before being ennobled, Caprinae Lowe was in charge of the rural equivalent of the S.A., the F.S. (Farm Soldaten) who were in charge of the Fuhrer's breakfast cereals. Though Hitler was a vegetarian, C. Lowe feared Hitler as a rival to power and saw the "Strength Through Joy" program as a threat to the F.A.'s power base in the "Peace Through Porridge" movement. He and others in the animal rights wing in the NSDAP feared that Hitler's continued leadership would lead to a slaughter of farm animals as a "Final Solution" to the question of keeping Goering fed.
After the Anschluss, Caprinae, with support from his Italian counterpart Benito Aegagrus Hircus, made plans for a massive attack on Russia to gain additional "Leibenswurst", wherein a vegetarian Germany would enslave eastern livestock. To prevent a two front war, he first attacked and defeated France, then made a peace overture to Britain. The offer was rejected by Churchill (who C. L. described as being "stubborn as an old goat") and in drawing up plans to invade the British Isles with a force of sea lions.
Really. I read it in Wikipedia somewhere.
Originally Posted by Kevin C. Smith
The new head of the party is Herr C. von Lowe.
Who?
Before being ennobled, Caprinae Lowe was in charge of the rural equivalent of the S.A., the F.S. (Farm Soldaten) who were in charge of the Fuhrer's breakfast cereals. Though Hitler was a vegetarian, C. Lowe feared Hitler as a rival to power and saw the "Strength Through Joy" program as a threat to the F.A.'s power base in the "Peace Through Porridge" movement. He and others in the animal rights wing in the NSDAP feared that Hitler's continued leadership would lead to a slaughter of farm animals as a "Final Solution" to the question of keeping Goering fed.
After the Anschluss, Caprinae, with support from his Italian counterpart Benito Aegagrus Hircus, made plans for a massive attack on Russia to gain additional "Leibenswurst", wherein a vegetarian Germany would enslave eastern livestock. To prevent a two front war, he first attacked and defeated France, then made a peace overture to Britain. The offer was rejected by Churchill (who C. L. described as being "stubborn as an old goat") and in drawing up plans to invade the British Isles with a force of sea lions.
Really. I read it in Wikipedia somewhere.
Last edited:
TFSmith121
Banned
Ariete, then...this is just for pun:
Ariete, then...this is just for pun:
The Big Sheep
By Chandler Raymond
IT WAS ABOUT ELEVEN O'CLOCK in the morning, mid October, with the sun not shining and a look of hard wet rain in the clearness of the Alps. I was wearing my dark black Hugo Boss uniform, with dark black shirt, tie and peaked cap, black boots, black wool socks with dark red swastikas on them. I was neat, clean, shaved and sober, and I didn't care who knew it. I was everything the well-dressed private unterobersturmgruppefuhrerleiteroffizierfeldhernkadetoberstmarschall ought to be. I was calling on four billion reichsmarks. The main hallway of the Berghof place was two stories high...
Best,
Ariete, then...this is just for pun:
The Big Sheep
By Chandler Raymond
IT WAS ABOUT ELEVEN O'CLOCK in the morning, mid October, with the sun not shining and a look of hard wet rain in the clearness of the Alps. I was wearing my dark black Hugo Boss uniform, with dark black shirt, tie and peaked cap, black boots, black wool socks with dark red swastikas on them. I was neat, clean, shaved and sober, and I didn't care who knew it. I was everything the well-dressed private unterobersturmgruppefuhrerleiteroffizierfeldhernkadetoberstmarschall ought to be. I was calling on four billion reichsmarks. The main hallway of the Berghof place was two stories high...
Best,
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