what is the most ludicrous alternate history story you've ever read?

Stars and Stripes Forever, by Harry Harrison.

When the Duke of Cambridge (who must have been eating a huge bowl of Stupid-Os for breakfast) said "Let's declare war on the South too!" I laughed until I cried.
 
1861. Because the Union was obviously not fighting out of its league at the time and could easily drive the strongest nation om Earth out of its largest colony by 1862. The illogic from that book...it pains me as I type this.
 
I have to concur those alt history books of harrison are utter cr@p.

Apart from a rather bad story, the author also refuses to use normal logic/basic rules (for example ships travelling from north-carolina/Va to New Orleans in 1 day for example (which equates to 60mph, not bad for a cw era ship ;) )).

I have to say that probably 95% of the people on this board could write a better story.
 
Kaiserfront: Not only is everything in this series absolutly stupid, from a secret organization modeled after the ss crushing internal and external enemies at the end of WWI, winning the war for germany, to the appearance of every insane Wunderwaffe including the Landcruiser Ratte. The book is faschistic, racist shit and written really bad. Compared to it the Draka books are a realistic and nice storyline. Absolutly disgusting, but that bad, it´s nearly funny.
 
Kaiserfront: Not only is everything in this series absolutly stupid, from a secret organization modeled after the ss crushing internal and external enemies at the end of WWI, winning the war for germany, to the appearance of every insane Wunderwaffe including the Landcruiser Ratte. The book is faschistic, racist shit and written really bad. Compared to it the Draka books are a realistic and nice storyline. Absolutly disgusting, but that bad, it´s nearly funny.
Kaiserfront? Okay.

You've just won the thread.
 
"Apacheria", an apache nation manage to survive completely indpendent within a USA that is in other way exactly the same. They even manage to win 2 attempted invasions.
 
I haven't read much published AH, but I can feel a genuine stinker when I hear what goes on in the plot. The premise of Stars and Stripes sounds mind-bogglingly absurd. The invasion of Long Island and the US by Imperial Germany in Conroy's 1901 must be SaS's equally demented cousin.

The Draka series is also pretty dull and stupid with all the gratuituous hawking of its single gimmick : "ZOMG, teh bad guys win, dude !" Yay, hurray, I have never in my life heard of such a fascinating premise, thank you for opening my eyes, Stirling. :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Then there's The Year the Cloud Fell, in which the author himself apparently can't make up his mind on whether Mexico is 19th century independent Mexico or still the colony of New Spain and whether the American-Mexican war happened at all, since the western US is virtually non-existant thanks to dinosaur-riding Indians and the continued existence of the Cretaceous inland sea. Yes, it's as retarded as it sounds. Dave Johnson has a hilarious review of it here.

As for "most weird and yet underused to the point of complete irrelevance", I give you John Boyd's The Last Starship From Earth and its POD of "Jesus randomly becoming an omnicidal crusader-type goon who leads giant armies of followers and fights with a crossbow, which leads to a darker version of Christianity with a crossbow for its symbol ruling the world for millenia". WTF premise with a boring sci-fi story tacked on, truth be told.

Also, any near-future military novel, where countries or factions, no matter their size, ideology, industrial capacity and logistics problems, conquer the world out of the blue (á la the Draka).

The Thursday Next series would be horrible AH, but it's deliberately ludicrous for humourous purposes.


Oh, but the worst AH ever written has to be this piece of AH, which is completely insane. I pity the fool who wrote it. ;) :D
 
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Well the Draka saga naturally, the TBOverse even if tecnically well reserched is so historically inaccurate and so full of author bias, axe to grind and wishfull thinking that is laughable and in the end (and this is the worst thing) boring.
Dragon's Fury can be now considered alternate history and oh my god is the rightwing tecnothriller version of Stars and Stripes for sheer absurdity.
But in the end the prize must go to mr. Tom Kratman for Caliphate, there are no word for describe it really, image every extreme rigt cliche on steroids and you not even approach it.
 
But in the end the prize must go to mr. Tom Kratman for Caliphate, there are no word for describe it really, image every extreme rigt cliche on steroids and you not even approach it.
That's exactly the kind of tosh I wrote about at the end of my previous post. I utterly hate crap like that.
 
That's exactly the kind of tosh I wrote about at the end of my previous post. I utterly hate crap like that.
Honestly what utterly irk me is the nastyness that ooze from book like this...and the fact that all the study and theory about Eurabia seem basically lifted from the same kind of study who predicted an italian overthrow of America a century ago is not a think who make me really confortable with the story.
His description of the Arabs overlord in Europe is frankly offensive for all Europe we are basically being conquered by Cobra.
 
The Sound of Thunder, while demonstrating the effects of the butterfly effect, underestimates the extent to the point where even my High School English class didn't believe it, while simultaneously engaging in the illogical idea that time travel could actually change the present you came from.
 
Then there's Clash of Eagles, where the Nazis successfully do the Sealion and then invade the NE United States by way of Quebec...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clash_of_Eagles

Bruce

PS - Krapman is doing "Future History" rather than AH. And everyone knows from AH.com experience Future History is usually crappier than regular AH... :D

Bruce
 
A couple of Turtledove's interdimensional trading co. books are pretty eye-rolling, but perhaps we should give him a pass on them since they're essentially tedious junior lit...

Bruce
 
And then there are L. Neil Smith's "Probability Broach" books, in which Libertarianism makes apes sapient...

Bruce
 
I'd go with Harrison, but this time the "Eden" series. No dinosaur extinction and intelligent reptiles rule most of the earth. That part I can certainly live with. The part that totally ruins it is that fact that modern humans exactly like us also evolved (out of new world monkeys (!), I think,and the intelligent reptiles are cold-blooded formerly aquatic lizards, not the usual (and more plausible) endothermic non-avian theropods other authors have used. There are some interesting details, but the whole premise is so wierdly done as to be virtually unreadable.
 
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