The Ultimate Prussian Wank

Valdemar II

Banned
What is the best way that Prussia could be "wanked" to near-ASB proportions?

OTL?

I'm quite serious both Brandenburg and Prussia was two low population minor states, with poor soil and lousy strategic positions, if someone had shown a 15-16th century German a map of 1867 he would have been completely shocked, even if he was explaned that Prussia was just a new name for Brandenburg.
 
Do the Teutonic Knights count as Prussians? Maybe you could have them win the Battle of Tannenberg in 1410 and conquer Poland and Lithuania. Then when the HRE starts to go downhill, they join in and conquer most of it. Then you could conceivably have all of the Baltic republics, the Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth, and the HRE under one ruler. WANK.

If that doesn't count, OTL is essentially a Prussia-wank as well.
 
OTOH, Prussia doesn't survive the 20th century. In terms of what it accomplished in its time, OTL is a Prussia-wank. What you're really looking for is a CP victory, or a no-WWI timeline.
 

Nietzsche

Banned
What is the best way that Prussia could be "wanked" to near-ASB proportions?

Actually..


Get the Soldier King married to Ulrika Eleonora, and have her father die on schedule. She gets the throne, and passes it to her husband. In this case, that is Prussia. And behold, you have not only a wank-ready Prussia that is -very- realistic, but a Protestant Megapower.
 

Valdemar II

Banned
Actually..


Get the Soldier King married to Ulrika Eleonora, and have her father die on schedule. She gets the throne, and passes it to her husband. In this case, that is Prussia. And behold, you have not only a wank-ready Prussia that is -very- realistic, but a Protestant Megapower.

That wouldn't be Prussia it would be Sweden on speed. The Soldier King wasn't King of Prussia, he was King in Prussia, but with gaining the title of King of Sweden, there would be no interest in raising Prussia to a Kingdom, and Brandenburg would stay the title of the German possesion rather than being replace with Prussia (which stay the name of East and West Prussia).
 

Typo

Banned
OTL

A backward vassal of Poland and a minor state in Germany conquering everything from the Atlantic to the Volga
 

Nietzsche

Banned
OTL

A backward vassal of Poland and a minor state in Germany conquering everything from the Atlantic to the Volga

..would you like to clarify that statement, or are you one of those ignorant fellows who think Prussia would inevitably lead to a nationalist Germany-thing, even though the very idea of Prussia is decidedly non nationalistic?
 
Germany fought fairly well in WW1 and WW2. I don't think it's impossible that an industrialized and fairly militaristic power like Prussia could take over all of Europe, Napoleon style. They almost did it in WW2!
 
Why not unite Prussia and Britain by a dynastic marriage? Or would that not count, because it'd be "Britain with Prussia" instead of the other way round? I guessed so.
 
Why not unite Prussia and Britain by a dynastic marriage? Or would that not count, because it'd be "Britain with Prussia" instead of the other way round?

In such a union, Britain would be the heavyweight.

Yet dynastic union still would have some potential. What about a Prussian-Dutch union? This would provide the Netherlands with a good land-based military, round up domination of northern Germany, provide Prussia with capital from trade and the Netherlands with industrial goods and ressources from upper Silesia and Westphalia - although all this depends on the time of the dynasic union. Furthermore, such a Prussia might still be able to start German unification, albeit the result is likely to be less authoritarian.
 
Actually..


Get the Soldier King married to Ulrika Eleonora, and have her father die on schedule. She gets the throne, and passes it to her husband. In this case, that is Prussia. And behold, you have not only a wank-ready Prussia that is -very- realistic, but a Protestant Megapower.

Absolutely not. The Prussian would have either to fight a major Swedish rebellion every ten years or defer noblemens' and peasants' rights to the extent that Sweden would be like Hannover to Britain - nothing but costs.

Sweden has indelningsverket of local farmer-soldiers that worked fine only when the administration was top-notch and experienced commanders could run it. Swedish peasants were free land-holders and owned 1/3-1/2 of the soil themselves. The Prussians are used to tenants or even serfs tending the fields of the nobility. The first time a Prussian appointee starts making decrees to the peasants like back home, the Kingdom is on its way to splitting up in Prussia and Sweden again.
 

Typo

Banned
..would you like to clarify that statement, or are you one of those ignorant fellows who think Prussia would inevitably lead to a nationalist Germany-thing, even though the very idea of Prussia is decidedly non nationalistic?

No, I'm pointing out the rise of Brandenburg-Prussia is almost ASBish in its success, it was amazing that it even clawed its way to great power status, let along what happened OTL.

And the Prussian empire benefited and got along just fine with German nationalism all the way until 1918.
 
In 1914, OTL was still a Prussia wank. If Germany had won a short war with minimal damage, the result would have been a Prussia Bukkake!
 
Yet dynastic union still would have some potential. What about a Prussian-Dutch union? This would provide the Netherlands with a good land-based military, round up domination of northern Germany, provide Prussia with capital from trade and the Netherlands with industrial goods and ressources from upper Silesia and Westphalia - although all this depends on the time of the dynasic union. Furthermore, such a Prussia might still be able to start German unification, albeit the result is likely to be less authoritarian.
I always like the idea of a personal union between the Netherlands and Prussia, although it is probably hard to accomplish it. The Dutch wouldn't accept a authoritarian king/stadholder and so they would get rid of him as soon as possible. This will probably lead to an occupation of the Netherlands by Prussia and so ruining the Dutch strength of freedom of trade.
 

Susano

Banned
Valdemar said:
That wouldn't be Prussia it would be Sweden on speed. The Soldier King wasn't King of Prussia, he was King in Prussia, but with gaining the title of King of Sweden, there would be no interest in raising Prussia to a Kingdom, and Brandenburg would stay the title of the German possesion rather than being replace with Prussia (which stay the name of East and West Prussia).
Prussia already was a kingdom, so youre wrong there. And that "in" instead of "of" was a meaningless formality, really. However, before the exploits (and the ASB-level luck) of Frederick II, Prussia was no great power yet, so Frederick might indeed choose to reside in Sweden, making it a Swedo-wank. It depends of course, the Swedish King did not have as much power by far, which can be an argument against residing in Sweden (simply using the extra title for prestige and elsewise letting the nobility continue to run the country) or for residing in Sweden (Prussia obeys anyways, so trying to throw around political weight by being in Sweden).

As has been named here several times we can have several Hohenzollern-wanks, but thats not the same. In most unions with Sweden, Sweden would be the centre, and in ANY union with the England/GB/UK, England/GB/UK would be the centre. So dynastics are not the way to go.

The best chance to wank Prussia is probably the Napoleonic time. The Third Partition of Poland, plus rule over Hannover and practically all of North Germany... if that can be kept or even expanded, that would be quite a difference in power to OTL!

Oh, and Germany, even the Kaiserreich, is not the friggen same as Prussia:rolleyes:
 
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