The Rhineland Crusade

The intense summer heat had been causing Gerhard Lutzelkolb to take more swigs from his water skin than necessary on this long journey towards Marburg. It was also a way to avoid having to open conversation with his companion, Konrad. They rode in awkward silence with the huge lumbering form of their heavily scarred attendant John, leading on foot. Konrads face was still frozen in muted rage at his failed trail against Henry of Sayn. His tirades and promises of swift holy retribution against those who had ruled against him were seared into the minds of all those who had attended the trial at Maine. Soon he would sear their heretical flesh as he had done before to others. Their silent journey met with few travellers, though the increased fidgeting of Gerhard began to irritate the Inquisitor until he could take no more.

“John, take us into the bushes Gerhard needs to relieve himself,” his disdain marred every syllable.
Nodding silently John led them off the road through the trees and shrubbery until it was no longer in sight. The Franciscan, red in the face through a mixture of sunburn and embarrassment, stumbled off his mule and disappeared into the greenery. Despite the distance from the road, the sound of approaching horses filtered through the trees growing steadily louder. Voices could be heard as their pace slowed.

“I thought they said he came this way,” a first voice cried out.

“Bah, anyone in robes looks like a priest to them,” a second criticised.

“But two priests with mules lead by an ugly bastard? That definitely fits Henrys description,” a third observed.

“Keep your mouths shut and keep looking, they have to be along this road,” another concluded.

After they had departed Gerhard returned. They had all heard the conversation from the road. Konrad could feel within him both fury and elation. The fury over someone trying to kill him, a Servant of God and the sweet sense of such beautiful vindication.

This land needed to be cleansed of Heretical filth.
And he would be the one to do it.

****************

What if Konrad of Marburg, one of the first Inquisitors, survives his murder and gets his much demanded Crusade against the Rhineland?

He pushed quite heavily for a cleansing Crusade of the Rhineland after his involvement in the Albigensian Crusade. Konrad spoke often of how the Rhineland could use a Crusade to root out 'Heresy'. Much of his 'heresy' was speculative and built on shoddy accusations, but he had the backing of the current Pope and given there was Crusades built on far flimsier evidence at the time (the Steddinger 'Crusade') he probably could have pulled it off.

He was on the verge of initiating the Crusade with fiery sermons and other preachers calling for it whipped up by the notoriously sadistic Konrad, when he met a timely death and it petered out.

How would this affect Europe? Would it cause a string of self destructive Crusades to root out 'heresies' from the heart of Christendom?
 
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Oh, boy : that's going to be one of these WI, isn't?

What if Konrad of Marburg, one of the first Inquisitors, survives his murder and gets his much demanded Crusade against the Rhineland?
He wouldn't have it his way. The situation was wholly different, giving that German nobles weren't supporting or harbouring heresy as some of Provencal (in the medieval sense) nobles did.
A Crusade have to be directed against something, not just happening randomly. Unless Conrad preach for attacking all Rhineland states, but that's definitely not going to happen, critically without local clerical support (or any kind of support).

He pushed quite heavily for a cleansing Crusade of the Rhineland after his involvement in the Albigensian Crusade.
Because he pushed heavily doesn't mean it was going to happen. From the general opinion, he was at best delusional.
The so called Steddinger Crusade, was probably not more much than another peasant revolt where were mixed heterodoxial teaching (or at least folk Christianity), a posteriori considered as as redeeming as a Crusade (without being a Crusade itself).
Attacking Rhineland nobility out of blue was simply too different, especially without bishopric support (which launched the Steddinger War in first place).

He was on the verge of initiating the Crusade with fiery sermons and other preachers calling for it whipped up by the notoriously sadistic Konrad, when he met a timely death and it petered out.
All of this is, I'm sorry to say that, built on the black legend around Konrad.
Don't get me wrong : the guy was wacko, and it's only because he was one of the first Inquisitors that he managed to receive that much credibility.
But without clear pontifical support, clerical support and nobility support, he could as well preach a Crusade against Frogs, not being the only person to preach for such things without any consequence.
 
Thanks for the feedback. My knowledge of Medieval history isn't very strong. He did seem like a delusional sadist (his belief that heretics kissed cat anuses probably should have told me as much).

Given his only contemporary Inquisitor was Robert the Bulgar, also quite delusional, the Pope could really pick the most deranged individuals to kick off his Inquisition.
 
He did seem like a delusional sadist (his belief that heretics kissed cat anuses probably should have told me as much).
That's an over-simplification : basically he considered different heretic beliefs, some that were roughly similar to what existed elsewhere in Europe, some more wild.
That said, it's not because they're weird that he invented them : bestiality or para-bestial practices, orgies, etc. were tied up with witchcraft since at least Greco-Roman times (without mentioning cats specifically, tough, but they were relativly rare in Western Europe prior the Middle-Ages) as well the association with blackness.

The "he went with these accusation because he was an evil, evil man that was sick in his head", doesn't explain anything.
I don't think the point was about Konrad being insane or not, but rather why he and his accusations were credible.

Given his only contemporary Inquisitor was Robert the Bulgar
Most definitely not the only other Inquisitor of his time. They are among the best known but inquisitorial courts began to pop up in France, Spain and Italy in the same decade. Konrad and Robert are particularly remembered because they fucked up big time : one was murdered, the other was sentenced by the church.
Interestingly, it's precisely because of this that the Inquisition was structured as an institution and its procedures codified, rather than being mandated and let to personnal appreciation.
 
[...](without mentioning cats specifically, tough, but they were relativly rare in Western Europe prior the Middle-Ages)[...]

I'm sorry to go off-topic, but I'd like to pick at this point a bit because I'm remembering reading Darnton's The Great Cat Massacre (something of a classic in cultural history), the title essay of which goes into great detail about cats and the connections to European witchcraft traditions. The essay focuses on the eighteenth-century, so obviously its a great deal later than the Middle Ages, but I still find it curious that cats took so long to penetrate Europe, especially because I understood that domesticated cats first appeared in North Africa.

...um, upon looking at the above, I realize that there isn't really a question in all that. So, I guess what I'm saying is: really? Please tell me more about cats and their appearance in Europe?
 

yourworstnightmare

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I'm sorry to go off-topic, but I'd like to pick at this point a bit because I'm remembering reading Darnton's The Great Cat Massacre (something of a classic in cultural history), the title essay of which goes into great detail about cats and the connections to European witchcraft traditions. The essay focuses on the eighteenth-century, so obviously its a great deal later than the Middle Ages, but I still find it curious that cats took so long to penetrate Europe, especially because I understood that domesticated cats first appeared in North Africa.

...um, upon looking at the above, I realize that there isn't really a question in all that. So, I guess what I'm saying is: really? Please tell me more about cats and their appearance in Europe?

Well there were cats in Europe. First of all there were of course wild cats (the wild cat species are nowadays critically endangered, mostly due to interbreeding with house cats). Second, we know at least the Romans kept cats as pets, so the house cat had a presence in Europe at least since the Roman era. At some point cats became linked with witchcraft and disease in European folklore though, and many cats were killed, but saying the cat didn't exist in Europe before the eighteenth century is wrong.
 
...um, upon looking at the above, I realize that there isn't really a question in all that. So, I guess what I'm saying is: really? Please tell me more about cats and their appearance in Europe?

As said yourworstnightmare, wildcats were already present in Europe before Romans (and seems toi have been tied up with pagan beliefs and rites, which would be expanded on domestic cats later) when Romans popped up : domesticated cats were spread trough their presence, and more Roman a region, more likely to have them (household or going stray).

That said, their domesticated usage remained overall limited and not only tied up to domestic enjoyement, which can be pointed out by ferrets remaining the more widespread medieval mouser (while cats were used as such as well, within monasteries or storage), or its use as food in Antiquity and Late Middle Ages.

yourworstnightmare said:
At some point cats became linked with witchcraft and disease in European folklore though, and many cats were killed, but saying the cat didn't exist in Europe before the eighteenth century is wrong.
Did I say that? "were relativly rare in Western Europe prior the Middle-Ages" is a bit different don't you agree?

Again, while Romans widespread the presence of domestic cat, that was essentially tied up with romanisation and cats didn't began to be widespread as common mousers before the classical MA and still in competition with other animals.
It should be noted that cats didn't magically became associated with paganism and sorcery, but being the result of a mix of association with pre and para Roman paganism and wildcats, earlier association made by Romans with lust and trickery, and the return of non-Christian rites in the XIIIth century.

The relative rarity of the domesticated cat may have helped as well : there's less problems with cat hunting in southern France or Spain (where it was partially considered as food, and not just "siege food") than in Northern France or Germany (tough it should be noticed that execution of cats were relativly rare overall, with fewer mentions in sources than others animals, essentially wild ones).
 
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