The Golden Age

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(Title card by SargentHawk)

Hooray for Hollywood
That screwy, ballyhooey Hollywood
Where any office boy or young mechanic
Can be a panic, with just a goodlooking pan
Where any barmaid can be a star maid
If she dances with or without a fan

Hooray for Hollywood
Where you're terrific, if you're even good
Where anyone at all from TV's Lassie
To Monroe's chassis is equally understood
Go out and try your luck, you might be Donald Duck
Hooray for Hollywood

Hooray for Hollywood
That phoney, super coney Hollywood
They come from Chillicothes and Padukahs
With their bazookas to get their names up in lights
All armed with photos from local rotos
With their hair in ribbons and legs in tights

Hooray for Hollywood
You may be homely in your neighborhood
But if you think that you can an actor
See Mr. Factor, he'd make a monkey look good
With a half an hour, you'll look like Tyrone Power
Hooray for Hollywood!


Yeah! It’s back, everybody! I’ve revived The Golden Age. I'm well aware that my previous attempt was rather poor and amateurish, but I attribute that to lack of experience. Now, after burning through two and a half TLs, I'd say I'm ready to talk about the movies again. This time, I’ve decided to limit the duration of the TL from 1942 to 1949, and make it far more movie-focused. I hope you enjoy it. Since I'm sure that I'll go off on tangents about ridiculously obscure films, please stop me if you're at all confused.

I'll be seeing you at the movies!
 
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CHAPTER 1: THE END

December 31st, 1949

“Lights! Camera! Action!"

We open on a scene of raucous partying; banners seen above the revelers tell that it is a New Year’s celebration. Loud swing music is playing from the stage; we can see it is being performed by BENNY GOODMAN and BING CROSBY. As we look, we see that it’s populated by many more figures of Hollywood fame. There is HUMPHREY BOGART, talking with his wife, LIZA BACALL; LESLIE HOWARD, a drink in his hand, speaking to ALFRED HITCHCOCK, still somewhat shaken after the failure of ‘Hamlet.’ All are wearing various festive regalia.

All of these figures are shown in passing from our perspective; the camera is focused on the back of a woman. She is wearing an elegant gown, sparkled, and she walks through the large chorus of those carousing. We follow her as she walks to a large dance floor, where she passes ORSON WELLES and his wife, DOLORES DEL RIO, dancing. WELLES gives a salute.

She next passes the MARX BROTHERS; GROUCHO, HARPO, CHICO, ZEPPO, and GUMMO are all there. They wave. She gets closer and closer to stage. She overhears two people talking:


MAN: Hey, d’you suppose President Stassen’ll be here?

WOMAN: Fat chance!

We continue panning, and then the woman reaches a stage. She is directly underneath an ornate banner reading “Happy 1950!” She turns. It is CAROLE LOMBARD. The music comes down.

MAN 1: Oh, the ball’s about to drop!

A radio is played over the speakers. we hear the voice of BAUKHAGE, counting down the seconds.

BAUKHAGE: 10, 9, 8, 7...

A loud cheer erupts from the crowd. We hear BAUKHAGE counting still.

BAUKHAGE: (cont.) 6, 5, 4, 3, 2

Hats, etc. are thrown into the air.

Happy New Year! Happy 1950!

A massive cheer comes up. There, on the stage, clapping, is a former Senator from California and now the Vice President of the United States, HOWARD HUGHES.

HOWARD HUGHES: Happy new year!

Fade out.
 
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CHAPTER 2: THE BEGINNING (1/15/42-3/8/42)

From Helena Kauer, My Man Hollywood: A Life of Carole Lombard, 1979:

“When the war broke out, funds were needed, and a key source of these were, of course, from war bonds…Of course, those denizens of Hollywoodland were often enlisted to help entice the sales of war bonds from eager citizens.

Treasury Secretary Henry Morgenthau had organized the system, placing the publicity director for MGM, Howard Dietz (the man who designed the famous lion emblem of the studio [1]) in charge of the Hollywood Victory Committee, as it was called. The HVC was intended to serve as a governmental way for actors not in the military to help their country through stimulating bonds purchases…Women were especially useful on this front; stars such as Hedy Lamarr would kiss any man who bought a certain amount of bonds. Such methods were remarkably effective, amassing millions in bonds... [2]

Setting off by train (as Dietz had cautioned planes as being too dangerous) to her native Indiana, Lombard raised a combined total of two million in bonds. After the tour ended, on January 15th, Lombard encouraged her entourage, which consisted of Gable's agent, Otto Winkler, and her mother, Bess, to return back to Los Angeles by plane, for she wished to return as quickly as possible. Gable stayed behind to work on a film with Lana Turner, Someday I’ll Find You (1942), which was Gable’s penultimate film. Lombard had left a sort of blonde female dummy for Gable, with a note, reading “So you won’t be lonely.” He had built a male counterpart for Lombard, laboring on it for three days. [3] However, both Winkler and her mother were petrified of flying. So, in a sporting mood, Lombard proposed a coin toss: heads for returning by train, tails for returning by plane. The coin came up heads. [4] They booked express tickets that night, and arrived in Los Angeles on the morning of the 16th."

Carole_Lombard_in_Indianapolis_composite.jpg

Carole Lombard in Indiana, 1942

“Welcome back, Ma!”

-Clark Gable, 1942, welcoming his wife home [5]

From the February 1942 issue of Variety:

“Lombard Begins Filming; Donates $150,500 Salary to Charity [6]

Carole Lombard has begun filming on her newest film, [on February 3rd], entitled ‘He Kissed the Bride,’ at Columbia…Of the actress’ salary, $75,000 goes to the Red Cross, $25,000 to the Motion Picture Relief Fund, $25,000 to the Infantile Paralysis Fund, and $25,500 to the Navy Relief Fund."

Shumlin to Direct ‘Rhine’ for Hal Wallis

...Shumlin, who produced the play [Watch on the Rhine] is set to make his directorial debut with the film, while Miss [Lillian] Helman wrote the legiter. Dashiell Hammet is to script it. Paul Lukas, the play’s star, is almost certain to star, says producer Wallis, and Irene Dunne is to costar. [7]

‘Devil Can Wait’ Now ‘Hell Bent’ For Jordan

The planned sequel to hit ‘Here Comes Mr. Jordan,’ starring Claude Rains, has been retitled from ‘The Devil Can Wait’ to ‘Hell Bent for Mr. Jordan.’ [8]

Continued from My Man Hollywood:

“On February 15th, 1942, the film To Be or Not to Be premiered. Reception was rather bad for the film, with particular attacks at director Lubitsch. No actors were truly spared the critic’s scorn, but Lombard received at least faint praise.”

From The New York Times’ review of To Be or Not To Be, written by Bosley Crowther:

“Jangled moods and baffling humours…To say it is insensitive and macabre is understating the case…Miss Lombard glows, but her talents cannot truly shine in such a film.” [9]
____________________

Footnotes:

1. This is OTL. A lot of stuff about Hollywood is weird like this.
2. Allow me to wax EdT on you, for this is, again, OTL. Lamarr would kiss any man who bought $25,000’s worth; Lana Turner’s was 50,000, and she fulfilled this promise many, many, many times.
3. No, it’s not from Hollywood Babylon. But it is OTL, and so is everything until specifically said otherwise.
4. The coin toss is OTL, but its alternate result is the POD.
5. They called each other “Ma” and “Pa.”
6. This is based on an OTL Variety issue. IOTL, Joan Crawford took over the part that Lombard was to take in the film (released as They All Kissed the Bride, filmed under the title I have listed) and, in commemoration of the deceased star, donated her salary of $112,500 to charity. Lombard, while not receiving the part of a dead woman, still is eager to help the war effort, and, as a larger star than Crawford, gets a larger salary.
7. IOTL, Lukas did star in the film, about the resistance in Germany, and Hammet did script, but Irene Dunne declined the part, claiming that, while she liked the content, it was too small; Bette Davis took it. It was nominated for Best Picture in 1943.
8. This title change was made IOTL, but the film was never made.
9. Crowther did write a review of the film IOTL, which was similar to this. He praised Lombard’s performance unequivocally OTL, but does not here.
 
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Now, I'm not ordinarily a fan of TLs with pop culture PODs which result in alternate results for US Presidential elections, but I think I might just give this one a whirl ;)

Seriously, nice to see you bringing this back. As you say, the Golden Age is criminally underused.
 
Now, I'm not ordinarily a fan of TLs with pop culture PODs which result in alternate results for US Presidential elections, but I think I might just give this one a whirl ;)

Seriously, nice to see you bringing this back. As you say, the Golden Age is criminally underused.

Oh, right, says Mr. President Humphrey and John Glenn. :D No, but I'll try to make this far better than before.
 
In the next update, which should come on Saturday, I'll discuss the filming of 'He Kissed the Bride,' drama between the Gables, and the initial development of 'Everybody Comes To Rick's'.
 
CHAPTER 3: STRANGE RUMBLINGS IN HOLLYWOODLAND (3/8/42-4/10/42)

From Helena Kauer, My Man Hollywood: A Life of Carole Lombard, 1979:

"Beginning on February 3rd, Lombard began filming He Kissed the Bride. The film was meant as a sort of spiritual successor to Lombard's performance in To Be or Not to Be, which, while somewhat critically panned, was still successful enough to make money...(Legend has it that Jack Benny's father walked out of the theater early in, disgusting at his son's wearing of Nazi uniform, but Benny was later able to dissuade him, and he saw the film 46 times.) [1] ...Bride starred Lombard as Margaret Drew, a tough-as-nails trucker, and Melvyn Douglas as Michael Holmes, a writer who she comes to love. The film was a mediocre success, propelled more by Lombard's star power than anything else. Perhaps the best idea of what the film is like would be one of its tag lines: "There's Never Anything Wrong With A Woman That A Man's Lips Won't Cure!" It grossed $950,000. [2]

...Meanwhile, Clark Gable was filming Somewhere I'll Find You. But Lombard was unhappy, claiming that he, like every able-bodied man, should serve his country in the Army. At first, Gable protested, but eventually, he gave in. This would have grave consequences..."

From Ernest Krupp, You Must Remember This: The Story of They All Come To Rick's, 1991:

"As many know, the film that we all know and love started life as a "terrible" Broadway play, of the name "Everybody Comes to Rick's", which lay unproduced. However, it was seen by the Warner Bros. story analyst who discovered it, Stephen Karnot, as "sophisticated hokum." Irene Diamond, a story editor, convinced producer Hal Wallis to buy the script for a rather excessive $20,000. The film was written by twins Julius and Philip Epstein, who kept much of the original cast. Filming was to begin on April 10th, 1942, but intricacies of casting held it up. [3] After negotiations, all that was clear was that William Wyler [4] was to direct, and Humphrey Bogart was to star. The casting of the part of Lois Meredith, his lover, was a rather strange process."

From Diana Morse, The Cat of the Screen: The Films of Liza Bacall, 1978:

"Bacall had been modeling and acting under her real name, Betty Joan Perske, for some time before she was chosen to play the lead in Rick's The studio had been frantic to discover someone with the right flair for the part. Since she was to be an American, that threw out actresses like Ingrid Bergman, an initial frontrunner for the role, who was signed to Selznick. Other possibilities included Ann Sheridan (allegedly to star with Ronald Reagan, in one oft-repeated - and facetious - tale), Hedy Lamarr, and Luise Rainer, who was deemed a bit to old for the part. [5] However, it was Louise Fazenda, producer Wallis' wife, who made the crucial discovery...

In mid 1942, Ms. Bacall had become Ms. Greenwich Village, and it just so happened that a play she was in was seen by Ms. Fazenda. She met with Bacall after the show, and asked if she'd be interested in going to Hollywood, to star in a movie about refugees. She was 18 at the time, and she said yes."

Continued from You Must Remember This: The Story of They All Come To Rick's:

"Thus it was that Betty Joan Perske was cast. Of course, her name was changed. She used a variant of her mother's maiden name, Bacal, and changed her first name to Elizabeth, with, proving too sesquipedalian, was shortened to Liza."
____________________

Footnotes:

1. This is OTL.
2. The first of these is OTL. However, the film grosses less ITTL than in OTL, by a margin of 50,000.
3. As it was supposed to OTL.
4. A distinct possibility OTL, but Wyler objected because of the singing scenes.
 
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Bad Butterflies, Bad!

If you butterfly Dooley Wilson out of Rick's Place, I will shoot you!! :mad:

Liza Bacall, YES!!! -- "You know how to whistle, don't you?" "Here's looking at you, kid." :D
 
If you butterfly Dooley Wilson out of Rick's Place, I will shoot you!! :mad:

Liza Bacall, YES!!! -- "You know how to whistle, don't you?" "Here's looking at you, kid." :D

Do you know any bulletproof vest vendors? I'm afraid Mr. Wilson won't be in it. However, we get to have incredible chemistry between Bogart and Bacall in Rick's early, and a minor role with a certain Hungarian vampire...
 
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