Chapter Nine Hundred Eighty-Eight
29th November 1952
Washington D.C.
A month full of small disasters. That was how Nancy would have put it. Ever since she had briefed the President, her supervisor, Paul Finley had been sniping at her. That had all come to a head this week as the time for the annual review had come. A year earlier, Nancy had gotten a glowing review. This year heavy emphases had been placed on her reluctance to spend time in the field and her apparent inability to separate the personal from the professional. She had spent six months in the field and she had been recruited to R&A Branch because of her personal connections.
Then in the middle of the month her father had suffered a heart attack at work. He had passed away before the ambulance had arrived. Nancy’s mother had told her after the funeral that she was selling the house in Puyallup and moving in with Aunt Martha’s family in Spokane. Thanksgiving had been particularly lonely for Nancy this year, it had felt like everything she had worked for was slipping away. Her family’s home was essentially gone, the people scattered. The Christmas decorations were going up and it felt like stab to her heart every time Nancy saw the idealized family life that was depicted in the adverts.
Then there was what had happened the night before. Nancy had tried to numb herself with alcohol and had just made things worse. Tilo, of all people had shown up on her doorstep. To see how she was doing, and she had unloaded on him. Everything she knew, the things she was stupidly keeping secret out of some misguided affection for him. She knew who Johann Schultz really was, that he was mysterious figure who had been subverting American interests for decades. She remembered the shocked look on Tilo’s face as she had carried on, more because of her behavior, not what she was saying.
Now it was the next morning and Nancy woke up wearing the same clothes she had worn the day before and badly hungover. She was staring at the ceiling of her apartment. There was a small crack in the plaster over her bed that had resisted all attempts to paint over it. It was a perfect metaphor for her life, was staring at that crack what she had to look forward to for the next thirty years? She had probably succeeded in chasing Tilo off, finally. That was an impossible relationship, she had known that all along. Even if Tilo’s father wasn’t what he was, being in a relationship with a foreign national was enough to get her security clearances revoked. Especially when that foreign national was a member of a Military Intelligence Agency, which was exactly what the SKA/MA was under the German BND.
Staggering into the bathroom, Nancy cupped her hands under the running water and drank from them. A bit of water and aspirin helped a bit with the pounding in her head. How many times had she been in the bathroom telling herself that she wouldn’t do this to herself again? Nancy had lost count.
Then she heard the rattle of a key in the lock and the door opened, Tilo walked in. He was carrying a paper bag and a paper cup.
“You look like crap Nancy” Tilo said as he handed her the cup. It contained coffee with a considerable amount of sugar in it. As she watched he unpacked the grocery bag and started preparing breakfast, that included opening a can of beans. “I hope you’d like an omelette. The market around the corner didn’t have a great selection and the clerk seemed not to know what I was talking about when I asked about seasonal produce.”
As she sat there at the table Nancy just felt guilt over how she had treated Tilo the night before and the months before that. Why was he still around?
“Cheese, onions and beans which is the best I could do” Tilo said as he sat a plate in front of her and started making one for himself.
“You didn’t leave” Nancy said flatly as he sat down at the table a few minutes later.
“Where was I going to go?” Tilo asked.
“I can think of a lot of places” Nancy replied, “For better company anyway.”
Tilo just shrugged, “When it comes people saying stupid things when drunk you’ve got nothing on Reier” He said, “And I’ve spent last year constantly around him. I’m more concerned about why you were alone at home on a Friday night three sheets to the wind when I got here.”
“November was terrible month” Nancy said.
“Why, something happened?”
“My father died, and my mother is moving to Spokane as soon as the house is sold. I said a bunch of terrible things about you and your father. At work, my boss hates me, and Thursday was Thanksgiving” Nancy said, “I’ve very little to be thankful for this year.”
“I’ve heard far worse things said about my father” Tilo said with a smile.
“This isn’t funny” Nancy said, “If someone was eavesdropping I might have caused a great deal of trouble for you and your family.”
“Many would argue that my father has it coming to him” Tilo replied.
They sat there for several minutes in silence eating breakfast. It wasn’t awkward, it was just that they had said what they needed to and that was that. For Nancy the implications were terrifying.