One Nation, Under Jupiter: Rome Never Goes Christian.

Although for many decades, the strife between Roman and Goth was perhaps the most pressing issue in the Empire, a common enemy would soon turn the conflict into little more than a distant memory. In 1143, the Huns, the same savages that drove the Goths into Rome’s embrace so long ago, turned their eyes towards Persia. The once-mighty Empire had never been the same since Galerianus’ great campaign against it. Persia’s defenses against the Hunnic hordes proved ineffective. Before too long, the Huns had claimed Ctesiphon for themselves, accomplishing what even mighty Rome could not.


With the lowly Huns now bordering Galerianus’ section of the Empire, the elderly Emperor called for war once again. The other two Emperors soon did the same. A massive army, made up of Roman and Goth alike, soon marched towards Persia. In command was the general Theodosius, ever faithful to do what was necessary for the good of Rome. “As the Roman sees the Goth, so does the Goth see the Hun,” the general wrote to one of his fellow officers. “The Hun is more beast than man, his puny mind holding no room for art or science. If these vicious warriors could take Persia, think of what they would do if they took Rome. Our libraries would be destroyed. Our temples would be closed and looted. The augurs that guide our State would be punished dearly. Even the eternal flame of Vesta would be put out! It is necessary to keep these foul savages far away from the Empire’s borders.”


As vile as the Persians were, their soil deserved better than to be placed in Hunnic hands. Unlike mighty Rome, the Huns knew nothing of organization, of discipline. There was no single king each Hun swore their allegiance to. No sense of structure or government. Simply bands of warriors fighting alongside other bands of warriors. Through conquest, they had claimed a great nation for themselves, yet were completely blind to it! Instead of one great state, the Huns had reduced Persia to a patchwork of cities, each with its own man calling himself king. Though the old throne of Persia was gone, its plague of atheists remained. Zoroastrians and Christians alike now mingled with the god of the Huns.


With Hunnic Persia as little more than a loose confederation of city-states, their disheveled forces were no match for the might of the Roman Empire. City after city on Persia’s Western border quickly fell to Roman hands. In the heat of battle, the military’s Goths proved themselves to be a disturbing blessing, slaughtering their old enemies with an almost childlike delight. Although these barbarians played a key role in Rome’s early victories, their behavior alarmed those higher up.


“I don’t think I’ll sleep easy tonight,” Theodosius confided in an epistle to Galerianus. “We raided the home of the prince Mundzuk today. The Goths slaughtered his children in front of him. They let his wife weep at the sight before doing the same to her. I wonder if it is right for us to attempt to take Persia. Too many barbarians dwell within Rome’s borders already.”


It wasn’t long before the Emperor agreed with his general. In their current state, the Huns were little threat to Rome, especially after the army’s show of force, and the Empire’s former lust for expansion had lost out to its desire to keep savage immigrants out of its borders. Theodosius soon issued Rome’s terms to the Hunnic lords. Persia was theirs to keep under three simple conditions: Stay out of the Empire, offer a tribute to Rome, and honor her gods. Though the deal proved favorable to the Huns, it brought further misfortune to the conquered Persians. Eager to appease the Romans, the Huns proved more brutal to the atheists of Persia than even Maxentius had been. There was now scarcely a state in the West that welcomed those that dared to deny the pantheon. Whether he was called Jupiter, Zeus, Thor, Ra, Taranis, Attar, or Tengri, nearly all the known world now swore their allegiance to the god of the Roman Empire.
 
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