Kentucky Fried Politics: A Colonel Sanders Timeline

[baldipaul]

#MeToo 50 years or so early will be very interesting. Certain sections of the left could also be pretty misogynistic back then (certainly in the UK), so it could bite always round the political spectrum.

 

[Unknown]

Nice update; a version of #MeToo 50 years earlier is interesting...

One field which will affect is Hollywood; the fall of the studio system was in full effect at this time, and this'll accelerate it, especially if stories about Harry Cohn and Louis B. Meyer come out (and they will, methinks)...

This will derail Weinstein if his tendencies become known earlier, but that's not for another few decades...

 

[Bookmark1995]

Nice update; a version of #MeToo 50 years earlier is interesting...

One field which will affect is Hollywood; the fall of the studio system was in full effect at this time, and this'll accelerate it, especially if stories about Harry Cohn and Louis B. Meyer come out (and they will, methinks)...

This will derail Weinstein if his tendencies become known earlier, but that's not for another few decades...

Will Mr. Cosby get the reckoning he should've got? His "Spanish Fly" sketch was released in 1969. As Larry Wilmore put it ,"this wasn't a red flag. This was a huge Cosby sweater pattern flag!" Even worse, the dude was blatantly JOKING about what he did.

Seriously, how did he get away with that!

 

[DTF955Baseballfan]

Wow, guess I was really shielded from what he was like, growing up with Fat Albert as a kid.

Yes, there will have to ber soeone else picking up the mantle of black comedy superstar - or, as I posited in those links, several in different areas.

 

[Bookmark1995]

Wow, guess I was really shielded from what he was like, growing up with Fat Albert as a kid.

Yes, there will have to ber soeone else picking up the mantle of black comedy superstar - or, as I posited in those links, several in different areas.

I grew up with the Cosby Show, and his short-lived animated sitcom Fatherhood. The part where Cliff tells Theo "that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard," made me think that Cosby was the most mature and refined sitcom star. So yeah, I was floored by the revelations about what he did.

When my parents claim that guys today are not "refined" or "gentlemanly" I bring up how Cosby could've only gotten away with what he did in the supposed "good ol' days."

 

[marathag]

Seriously, how did he get away with that!

He was a comedian. Lenny Bruce didn't do all the stuff he did in his act, either, like huffing airplane glue (though he did other drugs that killed him in the end) or sodomizing a horse.

2nd, after the Summer of Love, I doubt he had to drug groupies to sleep with him. He was super popular coming of from _I Spy_

 

[The Southeast]

In late June, the combined efforts of the CIA, MI6, and INTERPOL confirmed that the assailants of the Beatles were followers of Manson. On June 30, the CIA conducted a raid on the family’s desert compound, during which they apprehended the only two members present, Leslie Van Houten and Patricia Krenwinkel, both of whom were burning materials and coating the compound with gasoline when the raid commenced. Both attempted to stab the arresting officers with kitchen knives before being subdued.

Both women confessed to their roles in the attempt on the lives of the Beatles, but were adamant in protecting their leader. They claimed that the third woman seen fleeing the hotel, Susan Atkins, had died from the injuries she received when George Harrison had smashed a lamp on her head, sending sharp flakes and pieces into her scalp and face. The subsequent discovery and examination of Van Houten’s body, however, proved she had ingested cyanide shortly after the failed attempt on the Beatles’ lives.

This should be changed to Atkins.

 

[Bookmark1995]

He was a comedian. Lenny Bruce didn't do all the stuff he did in his act, either, like huffing airplane glue (though he did other drugs that killed him in the end) or sodomizing a horse.

Oh when people heard that, they didn't take him seriously. That makes sense.

2nd, after the Summer of Love, I doubt he had to drug groupies to sleep with him. He was super popular coming of from _I Spy_

If he was a such ladies man, why did he need drugs?

 

[Ogrebear]

Great update!

Shame about Epstein dying. I guess it will draw the Beatles closer together.

Goodbye Paisley - burn well.

That Canadian baby practice is horrifying.

 

[marathag]

If he was a such ladies man, why did he need drugs?

That's what everyone figured-- thought he didn't, so that was part of what made that routine work on stage in the '70s, before he was 'America's Dad'

Richard Wright, for example, probably couldn't have pulled off the 'Spanish Fly' bit with his deadpan persona on stage without getting deep in the creepy area, even for the early '80s.

 

[Bookmark1995]

That's what everyone figured-- thought he didn't, so that was part of what made that routine work on stage in the '70s, before he was 'America's Dad'

Bob Saget is known OTL for playing the quintessential family man on Full House and America's Funniest Home Videos. Onstage, he is a ridiculously foul mouthed comedian.

 

[NHobson]

Shame about Epstein dying. I guess it will draw the Beatles closer together.

I think what will probably happen is more of a short term reconciliation and an amicable break-up a year or so from now, with a quite successful reunion in a decade. There is still a lot of underlying tension between the four of them, and this isn't going to fix it immediately even if it does actually make them start talking to each other instead of just shouting at each other.

 

[Unknown]

Consider this fact about Bill Cosby: in 1987, when the Tawana Brawley (she was a 14-year-old African-American girl who accused four white men of kidnapping and sexually assaulting her; it turned out to be a hoax) case was going on, Bill Cosby offered a $50,000 reward for information in the case...

How bad does that look in hindsight, given what we know about him?

 

[Bookmark1995]

ANCHOR: The “workplace pestering” scandals affecting American politics have found their way into Canada, as the nation to the north is reeling from a stunning expose on “maternity homes.” Here is our special report:

[FOOTAGE PLAYS]

NARRATOR: Their stories seem entirely out of place in the modern world: pregnant women shuttered away, violently restrained during childbirth, banned from looking at their babies – and, finally, coerced by social workers into signing adoption papers. This is the scene found in maternity homes across Canada, where unmarried and largely non-consenting Canadian women are sent to give birth in relative secrecy. Canada’s adoption policies has led to hundreds if not thousands of unwed mothers being forced to give up their babies for adoption, a policy that has been common practice in Canada since 1945. The revelation comes on the heel of the “Scoop of the Sixties,” which revealed that the Canadian government has a program that separates thousands of indigenous children from their families and put them up for adoption by non-indigenous parents.

QUEBECOIS MAN INTERVIEWED: Quebec stands in solidarity with our Indigenous brethren whom share our resentment at the Canadian government’s oppressive policies…

NARRATOR: Canada’s fresh new Prime Minister, Robert Stanfield, has vowed to end the policies, which fall under provincial and territorial jurisdiction but are funded through federal assistance grants.

STANFIELD IN SPEECH: The situation must be reassessed; this sort of thing has no place in modern Canadian society.

NARRATOR: The Canadian people, though, seem to be more divided on the subject than is the Stanfield government:

YOUNG WOMAN INTERVIEWED: It’s atrocious to punish someone for a lapse in judgement.

ELDERLY WOMAN INTERVIEWED: If you split your legs without a wedding ring, you need to be made an example of. I don’t see the problem here – it supports young ladies upholding a sense of moral decency, and being held responsible for their actions.

NARRATOR: An estimated 95 percent of women who give birth at maternity homes are convinced into giving their children up for adoption, and statistical data record over 500,000 births in Canada since 1945 as being “illegitimate.”

MIDDLE-AGED MAN: These homes make these hussies marriageable. So what’s the problem?

MATURE WOMAN INTERVIEWED: I went to one of them in 1963. They abuse you in these places – they control your movements, make you use a fake first and last name, and you’re allowed no contact with the outside world at all. I felt like a nonentity. Shame and sadness were constant companions. After I gave birth to my child and they took him or her away from me, I was told I would eventually get married and forget my baby. How does a mother forget her baby?

NARRATOR: The expose claims doctors would forcible strap women to beds, overmedicate them, and even refuse to tell the mother whether they had given birth to a boy or a girl before the child was taken away from them. And the Canadian government, seeing the fallout of the Ms. Arkansas scandal, is responding to the revelation with considerate swiftness:

STANFIELD IN SPEECH: An apology or an excuse won’t do; I am hereby calling for several officials to be investigated, and my ministers are looking at the situation from all angles to determine the best way to rectify this situation.

MATURE WOMAN INTERVIEWED: Stanfield can start by asking women what women want to do with their babies. Husband or no husband, the bond between mother and child is sacred, and any attempt to severe that bond is unforgivable.

– CBS News Special Report “Canada In Crisis: The Maternity Homes Controversy,” 3/20/1970 [4]

Thank you for reminding us that Canadians can be evil.

Consider this fact about Bill Cosby: in 1987, when the Tawana Brawley (she was a 14-year-old African-American girl who accused four white men of kidnapping and sexually assaulting her; it turned out to be a hoax) case was going on, Bill Cosby offered a $50,000 reward for information in the case...

How bad does that look in hindsight, given what we know about him?

It was just another example of Cosby putting on an act.

 

[Unknown]

And those Canada programs...yikes, is all I can say...

 

[President Earl Warren]

she was a 14-year-old African-American girl who accused four white men of kidnapping and sexually assaulting her; it turned out to be a hoax

Didn't she accuse the Officers supposed to investigate the Rape?

 

[Unknown]

Didn't she accuse the Officers supposed to investigate the Rape?

Actually, she (or, more accurately, her handlers: Alton Maddox, C. Vernon Mason, and Al Sharpton (big surprise (1)) accused a local cop named Harry Crist, Jr. (who committed suicide shortly after she was found; the aforementioned people claimed he was murdered because, supposedly, he was about to spill his guts, IIRC), a state trooper, and a local prosecutor named Steven Pagones, who sued them for defamation and won in 1998...

Of course, you can find sites that still claim she was raped; Spike Lee even had "Tawana Told The Truth" spray-painted on a wall in his movie Do The Right Thing...

(1) Remind me again why Al Sharpton is considered credible at anything; this should have destroyed his reputation...

 

[Bookmark1995]

Actually, she (or, more accurately, her handlers: Alton Maddox, C. Vernon Mason, and Al Sharpton (big surprise (1)) accused a local cop named Harry Crist, Jr. (who committed suicide shortly after she was found; the aforementioned people claimed he was murdered because, supposedly, he was about to spill his guts, IIRC), a state trooper, and a local prosecutor named Steven Pagones, who sued them for defamation and won in 1998...

Of course, you can find sites that still claim she was raped; Spike Lee even had "Tawana Told The Truth" spray-painted on a wall in his movie Do The Right Thing...

(1) Remind me again why Al Sharpton is considered credible at anything; this should have destroyed his reputation...

For the same reason Trump hasn't been sent to a sensitivity or sexual harassment course.

Both men are good at the cons they pull on the public.

 

[gap80]

Whoa. A lot to respond to; okay, here goes:

this doesn't sound right

Noted and fixed, thank you.

God bless you (and Governor Robison), @gap80

All that needs to be done is to figure out which companies will relocate to Louisville over the next few decades.

International Harvester - which once had a plant there, closed it, and later sold part of its business and renamed the remainder Navistar in the '80s -- could be a prime candidate. IH doesn't split, and moves to Louisville.

Looking ahead to TTL's 2019, I initially thought of Indy for relocation candidates, and found the main corporations have roots there. So unless the Colonel can convince somebody to move south, Indy's probably similar enough to OTL.

Nashville might be ripe for the picking -- although I won't touch the music industry. I'm thinking of the Nissan North America headquarters, Bridgestone, HCA, and somebody like Dollar General.

Cincinnati (Kroger? Cintas? Fifth Third Bank?) and St. Louis, as the other major metropolitan areas within a four-hour drive of Louisville, may offer additional relocation candidates as well.

If anyone's interested, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Economy_of_Louisville,_Kentucky breaks down who the major corporations are OTL. By the way, in OTL KFC operates as a subsidiary of Yum! Brands, which has its global headquarters right in Louisville.

Thanks for the link, I'll try to flesh out the development of the region as the years/posts go by for ya...

Very nice update.

Elvis and Jagger? I can see that. Elvis and Keith?

Manson family as mad as ever. Hope they are caught soon. No dead Beatles please.

That Mao and bucket image Fantastic.

MacDouble replaces the Big Mac?

African-American on the moon = awesome.

Bye Hoover!

I wonder where motivation/push for ‘Mrs Arkansas’ allegations come from...

Keith? Maybe...

We'll see.

Thanks!

Yep!

Mm-hmm!

Uh-huh!

Ms. Arkansas was inspired by the revelations of Dr. King

@gap80 are you familiar with the curse of the colonel in Japan?

Yes I am, @ajm8888, but I haven't determined for certain what TTL's version of it will be. Any ideas??

Absolutely hilarious. The fact that Hoover was basically killed because the Colonel struck him in the face is funny in itself, but that fact that the Colonel is oblivious to the idea that he caused it just tickles me.

Thanks! To paraphrase the Colonel, a silver cane to the face can cause some damage!

I don't think Sanders even accidentally caused a hemorrhage or whatever to Hoover. The tape clearly says he broke a tooth so it wasn't at the temple I don't think.

I see that Sanders trusted Christ as Savior in our timeline around this time also. Wow, I can tell people now that we can have KFC in heaven.

I smiled at that image of Ho Chi Minh and the KFC bucket. Quite fun.

Will Gabe Kaplan do Welcome Back Kotter anyway? He could, if he has the idea he could sell it as a way to encourage education of disadvantaged kids. He had the idea because of his own experiences in high school after all. I sure hope the show happens anyway.

Now, however, he will probably leave after the third or even second season and someone will have some way to transition smoothly rather than what many people think was a disaster in the fourth season, although there were some good episodes. Horshack marrying at the end of a graduation might just work.

This is a great comment about the death of Hoover for me (from a writer's perspective) to read because the one preceding it supports the "Sanders Killed Him" theory. I like how that passage has ended up being so ambiguous!

Indeed you can!

Thanks, it was fun to make!

IOTL, Gabe began working comedy soon after graduating from high school in 1963. Here, he got drafted into the army due to the Cuban War, leading to him having a different career trajectory. However, his personality and tendency for comedy would still be there like it was in OTL, so it's possible he'll make us laugh in some way or another.

Apparently, Ronald "Horshack" Pallilo regretted playing the role as he wanted to play more diverse/dramatic roles. With Kaplan's comedy career, at least being postponed, perhaps his breakout role is something else! (And I agree, their fourth season was their worst)

It’s a shame that the Colonel’s past has some unfortunate blemishes, but I do respect how, instead of fully denying it, he admitted it was true and apologized for it. Of course, there still will be those whose view of the Colonel has been damaged by the news, but the fact that the accused accepted the apology and chose not to press charges because she felt he was a good man is something to note. You don’t see that in today’s #MeToo society. Speaking of #MeToo, I guess there will be an earlier one in the 70’s rather than in the 21st century. That will definitely be interesting to see how it affects American society moving forward.

As for the Beatles, that was a lucky close call. With Epstein dead, the team might break up as IOTL. At the same time, a traumatic experience like this will definitely heal any cracks the members had.

Meanwhile, I expect the CIA to find in Brazil a madder version of Jonestown, with kooky Manson and his clan. I’d hate to see the two sides duel it out.

Thanks for enjoying this!

It was great to see Sanders admit his wrongs. But what of some of the others - I wonder about how someone like Bill Cosby will fare. Will his acts - which were far more serious, apparently - be revealed?

If so, as I developed here in the collaborative timeline "Selma Massacre," it's early enough for black entertainers to still develop in the same family friendly way and even to have someone else develop Fat Albert and the later Cosby Show. (John Amos would be the right age to be the dad.) (Note: Also a little snippet here where I allude to Fat Albert as a collaboration with Nipsey Russell also added)

Probably some little thigns, too, like the general in Beetle Bailey not making sexual remarks 15 or 20 years earlier than he stopped OTL.

Great stuff with the beatles, the fight seemed realistic. Classic joke by Paul upon awakening.

L.A. won't reject stuff like Denver did - which means no Montreal in '76 and no Big Owe. But does that mean no Expos long term, or just a different stadium for them? And are the Colonels now a basketball team name only and not baseball?

Of course the Expos used Jarry Park (Parc Jarry) from 196-1975 and it was okay...but they'd want another sometime I would think. Then again, there was supposed to be a dome put on Olympic Stadium and it didn't get put on for 11 years.

I'm working on how to address Cosby.

Hey, thanks a bunch for those names; they and some other actors/actresses I'm looking over could really enrich American TV/culture in the 1970s/1980s ITTL!

I'm very glad that you enjoyed the Beatles' dialogue!

#MeToo 50 years or so early will be very interesting. Certain sections of the left could also be pretty misogynistic back then (certainly in the UK), so it could bite always round the political spectrum.

Thanks, I'll keep that in mind.

Nice update; a version of #MeToo 50 years earlier is interesting...

One field which will affect is Hollywood; the fall of the studio system was in full effect at this time, and this'll accelerate it, especially if stories about Harry Cohn and Louis B. Meyer come out (and they will, methinks)...

This will derail Weinstein if his tendencies become known earlier, but that's not for another few decades...

Excellent point!
Weinstein is only 18 years old at this point, so I guess we'll see how he turns out...

This should be changed to Atkins.

Good eye! Will fix!

 

[ajm8888]

Yes I am, @ajm8888, but I haven't determined for certain what TTL's version of it will be. Any ideas??

A. The curse never happens.

B. It happens and somehow a former or late US President depending when we have it occur, is considered a Demi-god due to spiritual beliefs of Shinto. Well the statue at least. And put baseball superstition on top of that...

But at the time the Yomiuri Giants of Tokyo are on a winning streak (nine years in OTL) The Yomiuri Giants winningest team of Nippon Professional Baseball. They’re the Yankees of Japan.

This is what we’re talking about for the uninformed. The Tigers haven’t won a series since 1985.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Curse_of_the_Colonel