Evilprodigy
Donor
I Marathoned through a bunch of Epic Rap Battles of History so I made this...
Enjoy.
Leif Eriksson:
Hey mother fucker! Is that some new land?
Oh no, It's your mama to give you a helping hand!
Because you know you'll need it before you misunderstand
I found America before your pasty Italian ass,
When I’m finished here, they’ll put you in a cast.
Vinland is the best and it’s greater than the rest,
And it’s off to the West you’re gonna fail this test,
Cause you just got to obsessed with some bitch’s damn gold,
I live to be bold, and you would just get cold.
and just so you know, and for all to behold,
I won this battle,
but it doesn’t even matter,
Cause I got to go back to fucking Leifsstadir!
Christopher Columbus:
Wipe off that stupid grin cause you know I’m gonna win,
When I’m done with you they’ll inform your next of kin.
You know they say your rhymes are a crying shame.
But to me they are so plain, that they put me in pain,
I’ll shove a flag up your ass, and claim you for Spain!
You’re just some old news that refuses to lose,
Let me call up by buddies in Veracruz.
I sailed the blue in fourteen ninety-two,
You got a wack ass beard,
you must be really damn weird.
Your mother didn’t complain when we were fucking,
She was pissed that her kid was just some damn Viking.
Leif Eriksson:
500 years before you, oh yes I was,
I found Vinland, according to the Icelanders' Sagas
Nice Halloween costume, where can I get one?
oh, never mind, I want none.
I’ll turn you into a Bloody Eagle!
You’ll wish Charles Darwin brought you on the fucking Beagle.
Dude, I founded where you live, sucker!
Try to rap against me again and I'll fuck your mother!
I'll slice that slut, like no one ever was,
Grow a beard like me, you don't even have peach fuzz!
Christopher Columbus:
What’s that? I just heard a dumbass whining,
You gotta listen like me, and have expert timing!
Your ass is poor, do I have to say more?
I’m a badass mofo, yo just a homo,
I’m motherfuckin’ Cristobal, you’re the worst national hero!
Enjoy.
Leif Eriksson:
Hey mother fucker! Is that some new land?
Oh no, It's your mama to give you a helping hand!
Because you know you'll need it before you misunderstand
I found America before your pasty Italian ass,
When I’m finished here, they’ll put you in a cast.
Vinland is the best and it’s greater than the rest,
And it’s off to the West you’re gonna fail this test,
Cause you just got to obsessed with some bitch’s damn gold,
I live to be bold, and you would just get cold.
and just so you know, and for all to behold,
I won this battle,
but it doesn’t even matter,
Cause I got to go back to fucking Leifsstadir!
Christopher Columbus:
Wipe off that stupid grin cause you know I’m gonna win,
When I’m done with you they’ll inform your next of kin.
You know they say your rhymes are a crying shame.
But to me they are so plain, that they put me in pain,
I’ll shove a flag up your ass, and claim you for Spain!
You’re just some old news that refuses to lose,
Let me call up by buddies in Veracruz.
I sailed the blue in fourteen ninety-two,
You got a wack ass beard,
you must be really damn weird.
Your mother didn’t complain when we were fucking,
She was pissed that her kid was just some damn Viking.
Leif Eriksson:
500 years before you, oh yes I was,
I found Vinland, according to the Icelanders' Sagas
Nice Halloween costume, where can I get one?
oh, never mind, I want none.
I’ll turn you into a Bloody Eagle!
You’ll wish Charles Darwin brought you on the fucking Beagle.
Dude, I founded where you live, sucker!
Try to rap against me again and I'll fuck your mother!
I'll slice that slut, like no one ever was,
Grow a beard like me, you don't even have peach fuzz!
Christopher Columbus:
What’s that? I just heard a dumbass whining,
You gotta listen like me, and have expert timing!
Your ass is poor, do I have to say more?
I’m a badass mofo, yo just a homo,
I’m motherfuckin’ Cristobal, you’re the worst national hero!