15th January
Dear Mr Hun,
In response to your letter of the 19th December on the late delivery of your 'Rocket Mail', I must point out that, in this case, Royal Mail was only the delivery agent for the US Postal Service who were responsible for the despatch of your mail.
According to our records, your letter was loaded onto US Post Rocket "Optimism" at 0h30 GMT on 6th December 1956 and duly launched from Cape Canaveral in Florida at 08h00 GMT that day.
Reports from the Joderell Bank tracking station indicate that 'Optimism' re-entered the Earth's atmoshere over southern Ireland at 08h55 and the capsule containing mail 'splashed-down' in the North Sea at 09h10, just off of Skegness.
Unfortunately, the US Postal Service had not notified Royal Mail, or any other postal service, of this new despatch method and, as the 6th was a Sunday, it was not possible to arrange recovery of the mail capsule that day. Due to the defence cuts of that year the Royal Navy no longer had a presence in the North Sea, the nearest surface warship being based in Gibraltar and Royal Mail's only sea-going vessel, the ferry between the Island of Muck and the mainland was unavailable due to an industrial dispute. The capsule was, however, salvaged by the Russian fishing trawler "Murmansk" that just happened to be in the area.
When Royal Mail became aware of the arrival of the capsule, management co-operated with and engaged the assistance of a number of agencies in its recovery, including the Royal Air Force and the Air Forces and Navies of the Netherlands, Denmark, Norway and West Germany. You may be aware from newspaper reports that recovery of the mail capsule was achieved with some difficulty and we must acknowledge the participation of the United States Air Force 490th Tactical Wing from RAF Lakenheath and the crew of the USN deep sea submersible Alvin who recovered the capsule from the wreckage of the "Murmansk".
A further delay in the delivery of your mail was caused both by the temporary diversion of the mail capsule to the US Navy base at Holy Loch for 'security reasons' and the State of Emergency called in both Britain and in European Nato countries subsequent to the declaration of war by the USSR.
Royal Mail was unable to undertake normal twice per day deliveries to residential addresses for some time partly as a result of further US Rocket Mail deliveries to the USSR, which were, apparently, misunderstood, but replied to.
However, I can now proudly report that a nationwide postal service has now resumed and all letters and documents posted before the nuclear holocaust and with a sufficiently low level of residual radiation will be delivered timeously. In the case of your own document, we will be happy to arrange delivery immediately upon your payment of the excess postage charge that currently amounts to three hundred trillion Eurodollars, payable only in radiation-free gold or food vouchers.
I have the honour, Sir
to remain your obedient servant.
For The Postmaster General