Don't talk to me like that, Boy! My 1st TL

OOC: The POD is that Saladin mouthed off to Nur ad-Din, who was known to be a cruel man.
IC:

"I cringed, realizing I had said the wrong thing to Nur ad-Din. He then turned and looked at me, he was very upset. He then got up in my face and said "Don't you talk to me like that, boy! Im the one in charge here!" He then called in his guards and they dragged me off to a prison."

- Saladin. March 13, 1152


"They brought in a boy by the name of Saladin to the prison about a month ago. He didn't fare too well, though. He got an infection within the first week and died a few days later. This brings me to my point: cover your wounds well, pal, or you could end up like him.

- prisoner Miqdad Toma adressing another prisoner. April 20, 1152

Any comments?
 
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I haven't seen a new Medieval timeline that interested me in a while, so I look forward to seeing how this develops.
 

maverick

Banned
Haven't seen a Saladin TL in like, ever, so I'll keep my eye on this.

Now return to writing and amuse me!
 
OOC: The POD is that Saladin mouthed off to Nur ad-Din, who was known to be a cruel man.
IC:

"I cringed, realizing I had said the wrong thing to Nur ad-Din. He then turned and looked at me, he was very upset. He then got up in my face and said "Don't you talk to me like that, boy! Im the one in charge here!" He then called in his guards and they dragged me off to a prison."

- Saladin. March 13, 1152


"They brought in a boy by the name of Saladin to the prison about a month ago. He didn't fare too well, though. He got an infection within the first week and died a few days later. This brings me to my point: cover your wounds well, pal, or you could end up like him.

- prisoner Miqdad Toma adressing another prisoner. April 20, 1152

Any comments?
Ah, I remember when the question originally came up. I'd like to think I contributed in some small way with my answer. I'm not sure on the colloquial language, of course it wasn't all formal speech (Harun Ar-Rashid shouting "Bring he his head, motherfucker!") but I'm not sure if it's quite close enough to work for me. That said, I think with a few tweaks it could end being quite good.
 
Nur ad-Din: Welcome, You may speak.

Shirkuh's Messenger: I bring a message from Shirkuh.

Nur ad-Din: Go on.

Shirkuh's Messenger: Here it is, and I am quoting: "You have killed him, my nephew Saladin. He was like a son to me. You will pay for this dearly. You no longer have my support. I have left your forces and have joined the Crusaders in Damascus..."

Excerpt from Nur ad-Din's Royal Archives. May 2, 1152



"I don't know if our forces can hold out much longer. It seems that the Christians have learned our tactics and how to counter them from a traitor in Nur ad-Din's military circle. It is a glum situation indeed, and our armies are getting weak and the citizens of the city are getting restless. Let us pray that we can hold them off."

A letter found being sent out of Damascus. June 21, 1152



"Surely now you must know that I meant what I said when I said you will pay. The city of Damascus fell to me and my allies of Christendom. I would like you to know that your actions have helped fall that city.

Shirkuh As the new Governor of Damascus. June 30, 1152
 
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Would Shirkuh really join the Crusaders and help them taking Damascus? And killing everybody in there? I think this is too much. Wouldn't it be sufficient to remain neutral? And maybe put forth some information regarding water supplies and the location of Arab forces?
 
I think that he would aid the crusaders as Saladin was with him ever since he was banished. (Saladin was born the night he and his brother left). So Saladin was like a son to him. With him helping to kill the people of Damascus he didn't do that the crusaders (who did the same in Jerusalem) did. If the crusaders got into the city, they probably would have done that and there is not one thing Shrikuh could have done at that point.
 
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It's far more likely Shirkuh would simply rule Damascus as an allied state to the Crusaders. A TL where Damascus is a strong independent ally for longer could be quite interesting.

Besides the Crusaders rarely massacred cities after the very early 12th century. Jerusalem was catharsis others were driven more by necessity than anything else. They needed populations to run them economically after all! I'd say Shirkuh rules the city after a couple days of sacking though the populace is not going to love him and he will need some wins to stay ruling as a suspect traitor. Normally it wouldn't be as difficult, but Zengi and Nuradin have been using Jihad rhetoric for some time by now and it can capture the imagination.
 
Just a small update ;)

"We were in the camp on the Lebanon Mountains, protecting the Barada river when the Muslim armies came and attacked. It started at midnight, arrows flew through the night. They each got in at least 3 shots before we could find their raiding party. When we attacked, swordsmen jumped out from the bushes to the right. Another party attacked the royal buildings in the confusion. A flurry of arrows came into the command room where me and some other generals were hit. One of the men killed was Frederick I. In the end, the Muslims, trying to control the water, were driven away when reinforcements came."

Shirkuh in a Crusader Hospital. July 6, 1152



"The savages at Damascus have came to strike us back. They have done very well, unfortunately, as the grand king Frederick I was hit by an arrow of a raiding party and killed. This is a great loss. A few of his closest noblemen have been killed as well, including Fredrick I. His only likely heir is his brother, Conrad. I hereby declare a day of mourning for the king."

Thierry of Alsace addressing the army of crusaders. July 7, 1152
 
"Fredrick's brother Conrad, the only hair left to the German throne, has seemed to be able to succeed the crown fairly well. He has begun an invasion of Saxony that seems to be going quite well. He is quite different from his brother, though and it is highly unlikely he will be crowned by the pope."

Citizen of Germany. July 20, 1152


"Your dogs were sent to take our water. How well did that go? They came in and shot me, but I lived. your forces were driven back away from our water to drown in the sands of the desert."

Shirkuh's Messenger to Nur ad-Din. July 24, 1152
 
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