DBWI: The Worst Sequels Ever Made
- Thread starter David bar Elias
- Start date
Honestly the worst sequel ever made was the sequel to the worst movie ever made. Remember way back when Disney merged with a lot of other major movie companies? And made Monsters Vs. Aliens Vs. Terminators Vs. Predator? What the hell were they thinking?
Glen
Moderator
OOC: Um, David, this isn't a DBWI....a Double Blind What If would be where people in an alternate timeline are speculating on an OTL premise.
So this should be about what would be the worst sequels people could imagine being made in an alternate timeline, where they all happen to be sequels actually made IOTL.
Alternatively, just get rid of the "DBWI" in front and you can trash all the alternate sequels you want, which is what people seem to be doing anyway so if you desire, I can edit the DBWI part out of the title.
Whoever is made Sense & Senibility with Zombies needs to be taken out back, and beaten. (Just because Pride & Prejudice & Zombies did well.)
Wuthering Heights with Zombies was decent. Catherine did made a damn sexy zombie though.
Who could forget Good Burger 2: Kingdom of The Fries.
Box office suicide, and the reason Nickelodeon has been cautious about every major movie since.
Box office suicide, and the reason Nickelodeon has been cautious about every major movie since.
Did any of you see the train wreck that was Ghostbusters 3: Tully's Haunted Castle? Let me give you a clue, if all 4 of the original cast decide not to come back, it probably means that the script isn't up to much. It certainly doesn't mean you should put together a "wacky team" with Rick Moranis, Chris Farley, David Spade and Chris Rock and send them to Tully's "ancestral home in Scotland". How many times can you laugh at Farley/Moranis slipping on slime and falling on their asses? The portrayal of the Scottish characters is right up there with Dick Van Dyke's portrayal of a Cockney in Mary Poppins.
Hearing the Ghostbusters Rap always makes me cringe but it was Rock's first major film role so I doubt he could refuse
Hearing the Ghostbusters Rap always makes me cringe but it was Rock's first major film role so I doubt he could refuse
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Back to the Future Part IV. How could a Camry pass for a Time machine? Talk about product placement. Mind you, Christopher Walken as Doc was so Bad its Awesome. I mean, he was awesome, but he's just not Doc Brown.
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Surprised no one has said "Superman Lives" what a huge ball of executive clusterf*cking that was. Tim Burton's style just doesn't work with the all american superman (not that he wore a F*cking cape or a blue suit!)
And whatever Kevin Smith originally wrote I really pray he had minimal influence on the final piece of crap that got filmed. Smith made Clerks II (1999) as some kind of penance (what with Dante becoming a film maker who gets messed over by Hollywood) which was an ok film.
Oh. also "Wing Commander II". All I'm saying is thank god for the Christopher Nolan reboot.
And whatever Kevin Smith originally wrote I really pray he had minimal influence on the final piece of crap that got filmed. Smith made Clerks II (1999) as some kind of penance (what with Dante becoming a film maker who gets messed over by Hollywood) which was an ok film.
Oh. also "Wing Commander II". All I'm saying is thank god for the Christopher Nolan reboot.
Didn't some Irish film producer buy the rights to Gandhi II, The Empire Strikes Back?
Yeah, they went into production. (Apparently) had Kai Penn (Taj from Van Wilder, Kumar from Harold and Kumar) as Ghandi.
Amy! was itself an okay remake, and I think the hate it gets from fans of Amelie isn't entirely deserved. Seattle worked well enough in place of Paris, the director seemed to have a good grasp of what made the original so great, and the main actress wasn't terrible. But Amy's Wedding... Ugh, just ugh.
First off, they couldn't get the male lead to play the part, so they had to throw away the relationship that the first movie had built up, then they throw this new guy in our faces who is apparently her true love, and then they turn Amy into this airhead who can't do anything without Mr. Suave. If that wasn't enough, they have her spouting random, nonsensical lines as if that was enough to capture the quirky charm that made her so endearing in the original and the remake, as opposed to just making her seem like a mental patient of some kind.
Then there's the subplot where the hypochondriac goes on a road trip to stalk a male model. Probably the only funny part of the movie, or it would be if it weren't so creepy.
Oh, and an honorable mention to ET: The Return, which was just plain stupid from start to finish.
First off, they couldn't get the male lead to play the part, so they had to throw away the relationship that the first movie had built up, then they throw this new guy in our faces who is apparently her true love, and then they turn Amy into this airhead who can't do anything without Mr. Suave. If that wasn't enough, they have her spouting random, nonsensical lines as if that was enough to capture the quirky charm that made her so endearing in the original and the remake, as opposed to just making her seem like a mental patient of some kind.
Then there's the subplot where the hypochondriac goes on a road trip to stalk a male model. Probably the only funny part of the movie, or it would be if it weren't so creepy.
Oh, and an honorable mention to ET: The Return, which was just plain stupid from start to finish.
I always thought that "Its a Wonderful Life, Jar-Jar Binks" was a remake too many.....
Snake Featherston
Banned
Battle for the Planet of the Apes. The sequel hook at the end of the second movie with the mutated gorillas coming out of the Forbidden Zone was badass, the third movie which consists of psychic gorillas fighting chimpanzees and orangutans and Taylor and Nova was cheesy and had a lot of bad special effects.
Godzilla v. Batman: A film both Godzilla fans and Batman fans pretend never existed.
Freddy v. Jason v. Ash: One phrase: Freddy Krueger incest scene.
For that matter Jason v. Mike Myers was worse than that one, the whole movie was a waste of good money and good actors.
Godzilla v. Batman: A film both Godzilla fans and Batman fans pretend never existed.
Freddy v. Jason v. Ash: One phrase: Freddy Krueger incest scene.
For that matter Jason v. Mike Myers was worse than that one, the whole movie was a waste of good money and good actors.
Sandman396
Banned
Terminator V: Resurrection was craptastic, too. It was so bad they had to get James Cameron to make Terminator IV: Brave New World to sort that s*** out. Did a beautiful job of it, too.
Why does T4 come after T5?