DBWI: The AH empire was so AH

IMHO, the Austro-Hungarian Empire, described by Turtledove in his new book Wiener Kaffeehaus, looks like one of the space filling Empires created by a hasty map cartographers. I don't believe Harry Turtledove actually wrote it!

It seems like the author happened to be in the mood of a German-wank (and placed such a vast country under a particular house of Habsburg), and wanted to experiment on creating an Empire mainly through intermarriage.

And it seems that Turtledove was also in the mood of colonial expansion, and gave the "Habsburgs" a large chunk of foreign colony through a royal marriage with Spain, albeit briefly.
 
I hated the book. It had not one but TWO German Empires .. oh no pardon me I mean ofcourse "Austrian" ... it was a real Germanwankfest, but even worse was in my opinion the books successor ("Münchner Brauhaus"). I think Turtledove just realized that he wanked the Germans to much but instead of repairing the damage he made it even worse:
-Austria-Hungary collapses (I think that was really a neccessary step to de-wank the scenario)
-Germany loses some land
-and then they all get bat-shit-crazy and try to kill everything
-Germany gets conquered in the end by the UK (!), US, France and some weird Russia that denies to be Russia :confused:
-the book ends with that the Austrians decide that they are no Germans any longer ... I mean wtf??
 
Not to mention the Hasburgs are so inbred and incestous, that was simply plain unrealistic. Sure, one or two solidifying cousin marriages happened here and there, but to let a deformed insane idiot into the Throne? come on?!?

They will fall as soon as a series of inbred idiots are on the throne
 
-Germany gets conquered in the end by the UK (!), US, France and some weird Russia that denies to be Russia :confused:

The "UK" in this book was also an Empire. Not only that, but at a rough count this "British Empire" controlled about a quarter of the Earth's surface - there's a real space-filling empire for you !


Cheers,
Nigel.
 
I think you folks may be viewing the series a bit too harshly. There's a lot of supplementary material which does a good job of explaining the Austro-Hungarian monarchy's system, and I found the story about the revolutions in 1848 pretty engaging.
 
As for inbreeding - it's not like House of Avis-Trastamara of OTL was alien to this (like four first cousin marriages in a row, with two double ones). In fact, I first decided that the author decided to save Spain by giving the Spanish throne fresh German blood - it was bad enough in OTL for Iberian Empire with insane Miguel II on the throne. But at least Miguel II got a competent wife to serve as regent and was able to procreate (though it's doubtful whether Fernando VI is his son or not). That Carlos II is just an ASB creature. And to think that his sister was able to successfully procreate... just strains the credibility.
 
IMHO, the Austro-Hungarian Empire, described by Turtledove in his new book Wiener Kaffeehaus, looks like one of the space filling Empires created by a hasty map cartographers. I don't believe Harry Turtledove actually wrote it!

It seems like the author happened to be in the mood of a German-wank (and placed such a vast country under a particular house of Habsburg), and wanted to experiment on creating an Empire mainly through intermarriage.

And it seems that Turtledove was also in the mood of colonial expansion, and gave the "Habsburgs" a large chunk of foreign colony through a royal marriage with Spain, albeit briefly.

It actually wasn't all that bad, TBH. It certainly helps build on the larger universe he created starting with his "The Death of the Federalists" short story back in '82. :cool:
 
OOC: You know, I'm always wondering in these DBWI's what their reaction is when the "asb" situations are revealed to them to have actually happened in an alternate timeline.:D
 
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