Bad Movies Gone Good: Taking the Worst of Cinema and Making Them Better.

Been reading up on the 1981 movie The Legend of the Lone Ranger here. Boy, did things go wrong on that movie.

First, the producers (who owned the Lone Ranger character) decided to reinvent the franchise by casting a new Lone Ranger. This in and of itself wasn't a bad idea, but then Jack Wrather decided to sue Clayton Moore, the original Lone Ranger, who was still making appearances as the Lone Ranger and was the Lone Ranger to many of the Lone Ranger fanbase (and still is), managing to order him to stop wearing the mask. You can probably guess for yourself how well this went over with the Lone Ranger fanbase...

Second, they decided to follow Superman in their casting (which had paid off with Christopher Reeve's casting) and cast an unknown over actors like Stephen Collins (1), Nicholas Guest, Bruce Boxleitner, and even Kurt Russell. The unknown's name was Klinton Spilsbury. Spilsbury apparently developed an ego when he arrived on set, changing lines because they were too short (this is nothing new), getting into a brawl, and basically acting like a big-time movie star--even though he was an unknown in his first movie!!! Also, Bill Fraker, a first-time director, was not up to the task of directing, and Terry Leonard, a stuntman on the movie, nearly died after a stunt gone wrong.

To make matters worse, Spilsbury's voice was a little flat. This caused so much concern that they decided to dub his voice with James Keach. This, along with other post-production issues, caused the film's release date to be pushed back from December of 1980 to May of 1981. The filmmakers decided to have Ronald Reagan make an appearance at the premiere--then he got shot by John Hinckley, so he did a taped greeting instead. When the movie finally premiered on Memorial Day weekend, it was a flop (in part due to the aforementioned lawsuit, which really pissed off Lone Ranger fans), and the critics hated it (though this was also in part due to how Wrather had treated Clayton Moore; a Hollywood millionaire is never going to win against an old, beloved star of a TV series in the PR world (2)).

If one avoids the mistakes I mentioned, the Legend of the Lone Ranger probably does well (just don't treat Moore horribly, and cast anyone of the alternate actors who were up for the Lone Ranger role); have Moore endorse it and it's up there with Raiders of the Lost Ark as a top-grossing film...

(1) Though they dodged another bullet with Collins, as he was revealed years ago to have engaged in inappropriate behavior with girls in the 1970s. To be fair to Collins, though, there are no reports that he engaged in similar behavior in any of the movies or TV shows he starred in (if he had, that would have come out by now; hell, his 7th Heaven castmates didn't know this about him until it was revealed).
(2) TVtropes.org has stated that this move would have won Wrather a Razzie for Worst Publicity in a landslide, had the award existed at the time...

In a timeline that I have on hold, I had Lawrence Kasdan as the Director of the Legend of the Lone Ranger and Jon-Erik Hexum as the Lone Ranger. He was not a unknown, He did a time travel show called Voyager in the early 80's and a successful TV movie , How to Make a Male Model. But he had not had the big break that had brought him to public attention.
 
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Scrap almost everything aside from parts of the John Barry score and the visually rather impressive titular scene. Have the ship raised near the beginning of the movie, with some exposition about what the U.S. government is after and such. Draw inspiration from Assault on Precinct 13 -or, well, Die Hard or Under Siege, but I'm supposing the film is made at roughly the same time as OTL- and make it a siege film instead of the slow slog it was in our world. Thus, the Titanic is the scenic backdrop for the fight to the death between maritime researcher Dirk Pitt (any idea for an actor here?) and the Soviet commandos, led by Captain Andre Prevlov (played by William Smith).

In my Step by Step Timeline that on hold right now, I have a better director Guy Hamilton direct Raise the Titanic.
While I think that Hamilton James Bond movies after Goldfinger are not very good, I enjoy the rest of the films that he did over the years.
And as Dirk Pitt, I casted Harrison Ford. But you could also go with Treat William, James Cann, or even Sylvester Stallone.
As you mention, the focus of the film is the siege on Ship during the Storm.
 
Name of Movie Raid the Titanic <credit> @New Cleo Genesis

Directed By: Guy Hamilton <credit > @unclepatrick


Cast List: Primary cast

Harrison Ford as Dirk Pitt
Jason Robards as Admiral James Sandecker
Richard Dreyfuss as Dr. Gene Seagram
Lorraine Gary as Dana Archibald
Robert Duvall as Captain Prevlov

Plot:

The film opens on the fictional island of Svardlov in the far North Sea above the Soviet Union in the year 1982 where an American spy breaks into an old mine where he discovers the frozen body of a US Army sergeant and mining expert, named Jake Hobart. Next to the frozen corpse is a newspaper from 1912, a diary as well as some mining tools from the early part of the 20th century. the spy discovers that what he seeks: an extremely rare mineral named byzanium, was there in the mine but had been mined out leaving only traces.

Our spy begins to read the diary and is then chased by Soviet forces who tracked him to the mine. The spy is rescued at the last moment by Dirk Pitt, a former U.S. Navy officer and a clandestine operator.

The CIA and Pitt soon find out that boxes of the raw mineral were loaded onto the a ship to go to the USA. The ship never made it, Belfast-built RMS Titanic by an American in April 1912.

A brief summary of world affairs overlaying underwater work to refloat an underwater vessel - the titanic ( which somehow happens to be in one piece nicely on the ocean floor in muck of course but in some odd form of moderate pristine shape.. ( no idea how to make that one work in reality ) )
the rusting Titanic is brought to the surface by using explosives to break the hull loose from the bottom suction and compressed air tanks to fill buoyancy aids.

The team locates the vault where the mineral is supposedly being stored and find it very rusted but intact but buried under debris.

During the night forecasts come in that a tropical storm is heading toward the titanic, Repair work and towing begin.
Whilst the teams are busy getting the ship underway a soviet seal team lead by prevlov board the ship.

suspicions are raised as several team members go missing as most of the wreckage is cleared around the vault. the team knows they are not alone.

Pitt kills a Russian and learns more about their mission. meanwhile the salvage team works frantically to open the vault. Pitt and his team square off with the Russians as they do battle through out the ship with both sides taking heavy losses.

Fearing the soviets will torpedo the titanic and sink her again, the us navy escort destroyer and a submarine begins a seek and destroy mission to find the submarine. while she is being towed towards new York.

Prevlov jumps Pitt in the Grand stair case. the fight causes the rotted wood to collapse under them sending them crashing to the floor.

They continue to fight hand to hand for several minutes. Prevlov pins Pitt near a hole in the floor that spans several decks. It looks as if Pitt will loose this fight, when Sandecker shoots Prevlov in the back several times. Grateful to Sandecker Pitt says, now I owe you one, sir.

Taking his radio gear from Prevlov, Pitt attempts to contact the Soviet Submarine to explain the situation and that they should move off.

With no response, the hunt becomes critical .. The Soviets fire a torpedo at the titanic however the destroyer at the last minute gets between the two and takes the hit causing damage to the Destroyer.

A sub killer helicopter spots the sub and drops a torpedo on it finally destroying it.

The team return to the vault and manage to get it open. They find only a small box of the ore, with a note Titled thank god for southby.

Upon arrival to new York, Pitt

You two can help flesh this out :)




Impact:
 
For me, the big problem with the Star Wars prequels is that they tried to fit so much into three movies. They were an odd mix of the events that led to the rise of the Galactic Empire and Anakin's transformation into Vader. In theory, one could seperate the two into their own stories, but I am not sure how well that work. Star Wars is driven by its characters. The best way of this would be showing the events through Anakin's eyes in his transformation into Vader.

This would allow some leeway in why alot is not explained, given how most of the things would be his events and everything else could potentially explored in things like TV shows down the line.

I'll put up a post on how I'd do the prequels later.
 
This is my version of P1, taking the idea of Jar Jar supposedly being lined up to be the villain along with how to better frame it with Anakin as protagonist.

Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace
(1999)

Directed by George Lucas

Starring:

Ewan McGregor as Obi-Wan Kenobi
Hayden Christensen as Anakin Skywalker
Natalie Portman as Padmé Amidala
Ahmed Best as Jar Jar Binks
Ian McDiarmid as Palpatine/Darth Sidious
Ray Park as Darth Maul
Liam Neeson as Qui-Gon Jinn
Samuel L. Jackson as Mace Windu
Anthony Daniels as C-3PO
Kenny Baker as R2-D2
Frank Oz as Yoda

Plot Summary:
The Republic is a time of crisis. Seemingly at peace, the Republic has began dealing with breakdowns and conflicts with the Confederation and Seperatists, with accusations of corruption and hostile activities. As such, the Jedi, formerly just spiritual advisors, have been taking a more active role in politics out of a sense of urgency due to the sudden disruption. However, they decide to send Jedi Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi and Jedi Padawan Anakin Skywalker. to help deal with a situation regarding the Queen of Naboo. Before the two leave, they head over to a memorial site, one made for Obi-Wan's master, Qui-Gonn Jinn. During a flashback, the two recall how Obi-Wan and Qui-Gonn first met Anakin and his mother, who took them in on Tattoine. The only slave child of his village, Anakin built C-3PO as a companion of sorts and is shown to be an insightful and engaging child, albeit also one filled with fear. Despite this, both Jedi could sense the massive Force potential in him and after winning a gamble, manage to get his freedom to become a Padawan.

However, even from early on, his path was wrought, the Jedi concerned about the boy. Impressed with his potential yet weary for his fear, both from losing his mother (whom he was forced to leave behind) and witnessing the death of Qui-Gonn Jinn. Yoda ends up mentioning a line that would become a running theme in the prequels "Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering."

The journey to Naboo ends up leading to a trap with Obi-Wan, Anakin and Padme heading into a forest and discover an eccentric and seemingly clownish individual known as Jar Jar Binks. A Gungan outcast, he is grateful for the company and serves as an odd combination of comic relief and able to get what is needed done. Despite the Gungans and people of Naboo not trusting one another, an alliance ends up forged thanks to Jar Jar, who appears as a relaxed figure than Obi-Wan. The united forces work to take Naboo back from the Seperatist control, with scenes including Jar Jar managing to cause misfortune for the opposide side through supposed inepitutde, though Obi-Wan would mention that it seemed as if the Force was on Jar-Jar's side...

The situation turns dire with the appearance of Darth Maul, the supposed assassin who killed Qui-Gonn years prior. The sight seemingly paralyzses Anakin with fear while Obi-Wan seeks to demand answers from him. When Darth Maul appears ready to land a fatal blow, Anakin ends up remembering Qui-Gon's death, and in a fit of not losing someone, he creates a powerful Force blast to knock him back. Before Maul could be questioned, he ends up killed by a Gungan explosive that happened to be there. With Maul defeated, Naboo is seemingly saved and undaunted, Amidala rises to the occasion to out the supposed inept councilor in casting her vote, with events leading up to Palpatine becoming Chancellor. Jar Jar also becomes Amidala's junior and as representative of the Gungan people. Anakin and Obi-Wan bond together and try to overcome the circumstances on how they met. Despite these victories, the Jedi become more unnerved on the realization Darth Maul was indeed a Sith and that they are returning...

Impact: While viewed as the weakest of the prequels, many applauded McGregor as Kenobi along with the various toher characters. Many also noted that while a bit inexperienced, Christensen did pretty well as pre-Vader Anakin, with many noting he has some of the characteristics of a trgaic hero. While some criticised some of his acting, later interviews revealed that it was intentional, done to show how awkward and isolated Anakin was from most others. Perhaps the most divisive character was Jar Jar. While the audience was divided on whether he was funny or unncessary, critics have noted that he may become a more improtant character, as rewatching the film allowed them to notice subtle hints about Jar-Jar and on whether he knows more than lets on.
 
Unrelated question: Is it possible there should be a video game version of this kind of thread? You know, turn bad games into good ones? If so, I could make the thread for ya unless anyone else is doing it.
 
I'd like to take on the Halloween series (or, more specifically, Halloween 1, 2, 4, 5, & 6). The following is basically a summary.

Halloween: Same as OTL (that was a damn good movie, IMO); you could have a scene of Michael killing Laurie's parents.
Halloween II: Largely the same as OTL, except that I'd change the revelation that Laurie was Michael Myers' sister (it should be noted that even John Carpenter, who came up with the idea, regretted this in later years; indeed, the 2018 version eliminates this). To quote Scream, "it's much scarier when there's no motive."
Halloween 4: I'd keep it the same as OTL, including the revelation that Jaime is Laurie's daughter; that one was also a good movie.
Halloween 5: Now, here, I'd make major changes. First, there would be no Man in Black (I really didn't like the Thorn subplot, as you can tell). Second, Rachel wouldn't die in the first few minutes; replace her with her parents (or even Tina (who was annoying), if you want her parents to live). Thirdly, have Lindsay Wallace (who was a minor character in Halloween 4) be the one to die saving Jaime at the barn; her death would be more upsetting to the audience, especially if you establish that she's like another older sister to Jaime. Have Rachel die at the Myers place (which will be the same house as in other films). And no comic relief cops, please. Have it end with Jaime saying he'll never die as she's taken away.
Halloween 6: Yet another one I'd make major changes to. First, as mentioned, there's no Thorn cult. Have Myers at Smith Grove with a lot of precautions, but he still escapes (imagine the Rob Zombie version of his escape scene a decade earlier). Have Dr. Wynn taking over Michael's care (and have Christopher Lee in the role; Lee later said that not playing Dr. Loomis was one of the regrets of his career, and the Halloween 6 producers wanted him in the role) and kill off Dr. Loomis during Michael's escape (that'd be a shock to the audience similar to Psycho). Have Jaime (still played by Danielle Harris, who also wanted to star as Jaime again, even getting emancipated to do so; BTW, Jaime also doesn't have baby Steven here, since no Thorn cult) adopted by John Strode and his family (who will NOT be living in the Myers house), and, yes, Kara and Danny are still characters; have John show a softer side towards Jaime (yeah, he's still an asshole, but he has his Pet the Dog moments). Mrs. Blankenship's boarding house is across the street from the Strode residence and Tommy still lives there, but he's become obsessed with Michael since Lindsay's death. The movie proceeds somewhat similar to OTL's Halloween 6, with John, Debra, Tim, and Beth dying (and NO Barry Simms), and then Michael kills Mrs. Blankenship and tries to kill Kara, Danny, Jaime, and Tommy before they're rescued by Dr. Wynn and taken to the police station. Then, Michael attacks the police station and wipes it out, Terminator-style (only with a machete instead of a machine gun). Dr. Wynn is injured here. Michael then disables Tommy and Kara before taking Danny and Jaime to the Myers house. Tommy, Kara, and Dr. Wynn then go to the Myers house with gasoline. Wynn manages to distract Michael long enough for Tommy and Kara to save Danny and Jaime and pour gasoline all over the house, sacrificing himself in the process. Jaime then takes an axe and, after teasing going after Tommy and Kara, hacks Michael to death with an axe, but not before he mortally wounds her. Jaime then lights the gasoline with her dying movements and sets fire to the Myers house, while Tommy, Kara, and Danny hope it's over...

(My version of Halloween 6 ain't perfect, granted, but it'd be far better than what we got IOTL...)
 
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I would be interested in taking on Black Rain (1989). It's not a terrible film but it is bad & dower affair and just a huge waste of effort with a few good scenes (which is kind of a shame because it has some really good actors attached to it). Michael Douglas's character is an annoying dick and isn't likeable and Ridley Scott isn't really putting any effort in to the film (it looks nice but that's a given) and the script is filled with late 80s view on Japan and it's culture (so it's filled with "Japan will soon rule the world" mentality but replace corporations with Gangsters) and is portrayed in a charmless manner. Now I heard originally Paul Verhoven was offered which would make it better if he did to it something like Robocop, a film that critiques the American view of Japan in the late 80s and is more of a dark comedy (or at least have comedic moments ) it could actually be salvaged. Now just to replace Micheal Douglas.
 
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