I like what that Smith says
(for the most part...

)
Between Smithism and future Jugashvillism (if it's still canon), I think that the concept of "one Kingdom under the True God" so dear to ol' King Andy will be badly shaken... Or not! Otherwise, there are so many places where these "prophets" can be deported.
And now, are you ready for some gambling, allohistorical figures and violence against the animals?
[FONT="]"Hey, officer! Got children?"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"No."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Do you want them?"[/FONT]
[FONT="](conversation between Ambra Savini and Alben (later Anne) Bloomberg, clerk at the immigration bureau of New York City, after the latter's sixth comment about her country of origin and her English accent)[/FONT]
[FONT="]June 1, 1827[/FONT]
[FONT="]About 7:30 p.m.[/FONT]
[FONT="]Basement of Clinton's Pike Tavern, New York City[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Turn your cards!" the croupier announced.[/FONT]
[FONT="]When the five Americans saw that the card they had staked everything on was the winning one, a King, they exploded in shouts in joy. The eyes of the Spanish player on the left of the croupier, who also was a Spaniard, and those of Agostino, who had compelled the Yankees to go for that card, met. The former was almost shocked, while the latter was clearly amused.[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Another deal! One, two, three, four, five, six." At every number, the croupier laid down a turned card on the green table, then he leveled the stack. Just before announcing "Make your bets!", he briefly held up three fingers below the table, outside of everyone's line of sight except for those who knew where to look. Like Agostino.[/FONT]
[FONT="]Another Spanish player was about to put his hand on the third card, but Savini was quicker. "Put everything here!" he told the Americans, who obediently complied. Meanwhile, the man who had the task to oversee the gambling room/additional restaurant space's activities left his place on the stairs and got closer to the table.[/FONT]
[FONT="]The Americans counted "400,600..." but their mysterious helper insisted "Everything, everything!" There seemed to be no space for objections "1000."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"2000 to call." the croupier said.[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Come on!" Agostino encouraged.[/FONT]
[FONT="]The Spanish who couldn't reach his chosen card because of the man with an English accent complied "1000 from me to call."[/FONT]
[FONT="]The strange man then turned to the Spaniard on the left of the croupier. He was six inches shorter and clearly overweight. "Oh!" Agostino exclaimed. It didn't take him long to start putting money on the table. "500... 1000!"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Eh-Eh! Perfect!" Savini showed his largest smile.[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Turn your cards."[/FONT]
[FONT="]Another King for the Americans, who had no trouble showing their excitement.[/FONT]
[FONT="]Then, a harsh voice resounded in the room, quieting down everyone. The overseer spoke. "Listen good, Englishman! If you wanna play fortune-teller, go play elsewhere!" [/FONT]
[FONT="]"Ah! But I'm just lucky!" Agostino innocently said while taking the stack off the table "Look!" He then proceeded to show every card to the crowd and announce it
without having seen it "King - nothing - nothing - nothing - King - nothing - nothing - nothing - King - nothing - nothing - nothing - King." He stopped. Now his expression was deadly serious. "This system to mark cards was invented in Genoa in '83: everyone who has ever visited a Mediterranean port knows it. Only some poultry from Andy the rooster's hen house could fall for it.
E me a'n'soi inglès, for your information."[/FONT]
[FONT="]Silence had fallen across the whole basement during the Italian's reveal of the sailors' trick, but after he put the stack back on the table and turned his back to walk towards his dinner and his wife, a collective scream escaped from the throats of everyone in the large room, players and restaurant clients alike: "SWINDLERS!" But while the hurricane of lynching fury was being unleashed against the three Spaniards and their patron, one of the American players, a middle-aged and very well-dressed man, got out of the confusion and walked to the now lonely couple.[/FONT]
[FONT="]"I'm sorry to interrupt your meal, Mr...?"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Forget the Mister. The name's Agostino and this here's my wife Ambra" The dark-haired lady nodded, smiled politely and picked up a chair that had just been thrown on the floor next to her to offer a seat to the American. [/FONT]
[FONT="]"Well, Agostino, Ambra, as a lawmaker of this proud country, I'm concerned about your future in a land so distant from the fields of Romagna."[/FONT]
[FONT="]The sound of cutlery suddenly stopped. Now the couple was staring at the elegant man, with a gaze that betrayed both suspect and disbelief. Ambra was the first to speak "Now, Sir, how can you possibly know that?" [/FONT]
[FONT="]"From the 's'. No one breathes it like a
Romuh-nyo-lo. I was part of a very tedious diplomatic mission to Vienna ten years ago, when my colleagues in Philadelphia still trusted me to occupy any position other than my safe seat in the House." Something resembling nostalgia was clearly heard in his voice. "As I was saying, the job was so tedious I spent my last four weeks in the Old Continent sightseeing Northern Italy and I learnt something about Italian dialects. And not even pronouncing the 'r' like a native of Lancashire could disguise you birthplace."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Lancashire? Oh, you mean Lancashrrr!" The three of them burst out in laughter: apparently accent-mocking was a way to start hilarity even on the other side of the ocean. "All right - he continued - you're a well-educated man, Sir. I think I like you, but I still don't know why a Congressional mugwump is so interested in the future of a couple of immigrants like us. I mean, hell, we've never met before and I don't even know your name!"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"My name is Robert Owen, Welsh by birth but American by choice." He bent forward and putting his elbows on the table and crossed his arms. "Let's keep it simple: have you ever heard of a land called Illinoia?"
[/FONT]
[FONT="]June 2, 1827[/FONT]
[FONT="]About 8:15 a.m.[/FONT]
[FONT="]Somewhere in southern Orange County, Royal State of New York[/FONT]
[FONT="]The carter who had given them a lift in New York drew rein and the vehicle stopped. "Here we are, people! Louise is just over there." he pointed at a slightly plump woman dressed in male travel clothes. "I'd wish you good luck... but with Louise leading you I'd say you don't need it."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"She must be quite a celebrity here." Ambra commented while helping her husband unloading their luggage.[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Well... She's not a person to go unnoticed, I'll concede that. Good-bye!" He then continued his trip to upstate New York.[/FONT]
[FONT="]The couple got up to the woman, who was tending to her horses, and when they were at a distance of two yards from her she noticed their arrival and she turned to them. "Are you the settlers bound for Harrisontown?" they asked. [/FONT]
[FONT="]"Heh, ya rask findin' sum'a them around here." she answered sardonically. "English, Welsh, Scots from those not-so-merry-anymore lends, Bavarians, Hessians and Swabians from the Germanies, a cart ov'rloaded with Wall-oons, a family of Serbians always shoutin' words made only of consuhnants, a few Polish and Ruthenians who din't laik the pruhspect of settlin' in Kaliforniya and even sum Aljeerians from North Africa. A Swede... An' then there's me, Louise Verney from Kaintuck, their guide."[/FONT]
[FONT="]As soon as she finished listing the components of the caravan, Ambra gave a gentle tug to her husband's arm and he instinctively brought his ear closer to her mouth. She whispered "This Kaintuck... Is it in America?"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"It probably is, dear. But definitely not in the English-speaking part." Agostino whispered back. Then, more loudly, he presented the two of them "We are Agostino and Ambra Savini, from Romagna, Italy. Last evening in New York we met Congressman Owen, who..."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Aaaah, Italians! Wond'rful! No caravan has ev'r been complete without sum lazy-asses who coulda only steal and get drunk! An' ta show ya my sincere appreshaytion, Ah'll make up for yer lack of a cart invitin' ya ta travel on my conestoga." Since the moment the guide had interrupted Agostino, her genuinely happy grin had never left her round face.[/FONT]
[FONT="]Slightly embarrassed, the Italian man couldn't find the right words. "Well... I don't know how to thank..."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Oh, Ah've already found a way. Ya both'll halp me take care of the other man who'll trav'l with us... THUNBERG!" she shouted.[/FONT]
[FONT="]A surprised sound was heard behind the tissue covering of the cart and a light-haired, square-shouldered man immediately fell on the ground from its back, scattering papers everywhere. Louise commented "Ladies an' gentlemen, Curt Thunberg. He'd manage ta lose his baluhnce ev'n if he was layin' on the grass."[/FONT]
[FONT="]Agostino jumped to help him. "Did you get hurt, pal?"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"No, no..." the man mumbled in a foreign accent "But my notes will need to be put in proper order... again!"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"What's all this heap of papers for?" the Italian asked while picking up a sheet completely covered with crammed writing, the latter full of strange letters.[/FONT]
[FONT="]"I told you: they're my notes. I've written down all of my experiments with iron back in Sweden and here in America. They're the only really valuable thing I own."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Iron? Are you a smith?"[/FONT]
[FONT="]Thunberg took the paper Agostino was handing him. "I am. My father too before me. Grandpa was a well-off man, he even studied at the Uppsala university under Linnaeus. He could have been a great botanist, but during a journey to the Netherlands some bloke had the idea of cleaning his new American hunting rifle while it was loaded and grandpa got a busted kneecap. Crippled for life he went back to Sweden, to pass the rest of his days squandering all his money in alcohol and women, my grandma in particular. Yeah, the only thing Carl Peter Thunberg left to his grandson was a scientific mind and no means to do anything with it." Now that he had finished picking up, his face was almost hidden by the heap he was holding up.[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Your notes tell a different story."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Performing experiments on small scale is one thing; trying to get funds to performing them on a higher level is another. I'm not economically self-sufficient to make that step and considerable economic interests are involved against me."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Really!"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Who would want to fund a project aimed at producing large amounts of cheap steel in the country of wrought iron? And even here in the URAS..."[/FONT]
[FONT="]But the voice of Louise suddenly filled the air. "All right, guys! Stop chattin' an' get ready ta leave. Ah want thar caravan in moshun in ten minutes!"
[/FONT]
[FONT="]August 25th, 1827[/FONT]
[FONT="]About 4:00 p.m.[/FONT]
[FONT="]Main street of Harrisontown, Royal State of Illinoia[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Aaaand... Ah thank our journey's over, pals!" Louise announced to the three persons napping inside the conestoga, still tired after the adventures of the preceding night. Agostino was the first to wake up.[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Hmmn... What? Over, you say?" After realizing what Louise had said, he jumped rather than stood up and started shaking his wife and their fellow traveler. "Ah, ah! I can't believe it!" he cried out while hopping on the driver's box. "After the battle against those giant, hairy creatures that smelled like a two-week old pig carcass last night I had lost any hope of reaching Harrisontown in a single piece!"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Ah've already told ya, Teeno! Those creatures was Russians. They sometimes wanders inta Louisiana and Illinoia when their colonies on the West Coast becomes too turbulent or they's irreparably drunk!"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Whatever those things were, I'm glad now there's less of them in the world!" He patted the M1815 Spaulding he kept in the holster on his right. The best purchase since his arrival in the URAS.[/FONT]
[FONT="]Curt's head appeared between the front curtains of the carriage. Peering intently forward, he managed to see a crowd assembled in the city's central square. "How many people! Were we awaited?"[/FONT]
[FONT="]Louise proudly answered "Abso-lootly! Mr. Owen nev'r fails ta send a Pony Express ta inform his Illinoian friends about me leavin' the East and ev'ry soul in the Kingdom knows they can trust my punkchooality."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Will there be Robert's fellow Congressman? I should like to meet him. If he's anything like his Polypotamian friend, he's sure good company." Now the crowd could be clearly seen by the three of them.[/FONT]
[FONT="]"He'll probably be in Philly, Ah can't see him in the first row an' Congressmen ain'ta guys ta stand anywhere else. Ah must admit Ah hain't seen him for ten years. Maybe he's changed a lot."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Ah! So, what about the one with the dog?" Agostino asked, thinking Louise could have missed Mr. Warren [1].[/FONT]
[FONT="]"No, thet's Harrisontown Lord Mayor, Joseph Burnett. Sum Crownie, thet Joe, but he respects Josiah. Aft'r all, Warren halped foundin' thar city while Joe came here only aft'r receivin' th' title."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"The one with the cane, then?"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Timothy Law, owner of this town's gazette, Ah thank."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"That one on the right of the mayor, then?"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Jus' told ya, Timothy Law."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"No, the other one! That man between the Mayor and the publisher..."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Thet's the publisher! The other on his right's Thaddeus Bayer, the banker."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"But you told me Law was the one with the cane![/FONT]
[FONT="]"Cane? Ah thought ya said "chain" an' thet ya were speakin' about Mr. Lehrer, the saloon-keeper!"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Who's that?"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"The one with the chain! Don't ya see? To the left of Law?"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Who? The Mayor?"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"No, the one with the dog!"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Right, that! The Mayor!"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"No, the mayor has the milit'ry hat! He's standin' jus' at the right of Law."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Wasn't that Bayer?"[/FONT]
[FONT="]"Well, actually, Ah ain'ta so shore thet was really Bayer..."[/FONT]
[FONT="]"So, who's the one with the dog?" This inconclusive exchange was kind of getting on Agostino's nerves.[/FONT]
[FONT="]Then Curt intervened, a little confused "Agostino... Which dog?"[/FONT]
[FONT="]The Italian couldn't stand it anymore "
Oooohhh... Mo' svégiat! THAT DOG!" And he punctuated his outburst by drawing his pistol out and shooting the animal.[/FONT]
[FONT="]The caravan came to a halt one second later, by now well into the town's central square. Twenty feet separated the assembled authorities from the Kaintuckian guide, the Italian shooter (smoking weapon still in his hand, completely paralyzed by the realization of what he had just done) and the Swedish smith, still hidden behind the curtains except for his head.[/FONT]
[FONT="]The central figure of the assembled crowd, Lord Mayor Joseph Burnett, putting up his most inexpressive face and keeping his Great Dane on a lead, even if it wouldn't have ever had any more chances of running anywhere, spoke to the travelers.[/FONT]
[FONT="]"We, the authorities and citizens of this city, joyfully greet you fellow colonists that, like many of us in the last decade, took the road to the West of this great nation under God and King Andrew to bring civilization to these wild lands and to show the world how true Americans can create wealth for themselves and for the whole country even in places where nothing existed before the arrival of the White man except dangerous wildlife and untilled soil. All the people present and the other inhabitants you can't see assembled here only hope for you to prosper and to have a bright future ahead... INSTEAD OF BEING SHOT OUT OF NOWHERE BY SOME RANDOM IMBECILE! A SAD FATE SHARED BY MY LATE DOG, BUCK!" He then angrily threw down the useless leash, his face almost purple. [/FONT]
[FONT="]Another voice was heard. It was Ambra's, who appeared alongside Curt behind the box. "Astounding what strange effects America has on people. Isn't it true, honey?" she whispered and then proceeded to snatch the pistol from her husband's hand, without meeting any opposition.[/FONT]
[FONT="][1] Not OTL Josiah Warren but an ATL older "brother" (b. 1791 instead of 1798). He was one of the founders of Harrisontown (OTL Springfield, Illinois) after leaving New York in 1817 and managed to be elected Congressman in 1823, thanks to his great personal prestige in his district and his effective oratory. Great friend with Robert Owen, his political ideas are less anarchist than his historical counterpart but radical enough for him to be branded in Philadelphia with a big red "SOCIALIST!" mark.[/FONT]