AHC: Bear Cavalry

As a biologist, it is my sworn duty to be offended at your use of the word "vegetarian" in this context.

As a Valdron in a long line of Valdron's, it is my sworn duty to offend.

Hippies are vegetarians.
Horses are herbivores.
Bears are neither.

But you can see how easy it is to make such a mistake. The resemblances are uncanny. I think we've all had that awkward experience where we've tried to saddle a hippy, and unfortunately realized too late that it was a bear.

But, you're spot-on about roughage and low-value plants. I wouldn't call bears "picky," because they probably eat a greater diversity of plant types than horses do; but horses, which are relatively specialized (read "picky") herbivores, can process grass and foliage better than bears.

So, at any rate, bears are hideously inefficient, and an economy based around bear production would suffer from greater wastage, greater land limitations and lower productivity. In short, the economics of bear cavalry would eventually override the awesomeness, and a bear-oriented society would be outcompeted by moose-, horse-, zebra-, llama-based societies (but is probably superior economically to walrus-based societies, unfortunately).

Well don't count Walrus based societies out.
 
OK, tht sounds familiar. What's a 'Humboldt Squid award'?

Sorry, forgot to check the thread. The 'Humboldt Squid award' is given to those who advance the cause of marine cephalopods and ensure their civilisation achieves it's rightful dominance of the world. This is usually achieved by wiping out all higher forms of life due to the consequences of the TL under discussion. It's like the Vlad Tepes award, only more so.

Edit: the actual text, courtesy of Calbear.

Congratulations.

You are this week's winner of the Humboldt Squid award. This highly prized award recognized scenarios that eradicate the Human Race and most land based life thereby clearing the decks for further explosive evolution of cephalopods to their proper place in the Animal Kingdom.
 
Screw the laws of nature, ludwig made the most amazing castle of all time so i think if he is dedicated he could teach a bear to speak english and drink tea!!

But wouldn't that make it hard for Ludwig as a Bavarian to communicate with his trained bear? It just seems like a lot of extra effort to teach a bear to speak a language other than your own. The translator would just be added overhead.
 
Fighting side by side

I guess my question is why people would want to make bears as mounts when they are perfectly capable of doing more damage if they are up on their hind legs. From there it seems to be a short path to having the bears actually throwing things at the enemy. Now this might cause some problems during peacetime by having the bears throwing things that they shouldn't. I could see all sorts of conflicts between those who think that they should have access to things to throw when they aren't actually in battle against those who don't. Because all timelines should have arguments over the right to arm bears. :)
 
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