A Map Shitpost Thread

Do people want a WIP thread?

  • Yes

    Votes: 62 75.6%
  • No

    Votes: 20 24.4%

  • Total voters
    82
  • Poll closed .

Dagoth Ur

Banned
Literally
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Map of Saudi Arabia by rivers
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Only Poland is eternal
FB_IMG_1650637864490.jpg
 
I feel these are less shitposts and more just random jokes people find. Not that that isn't appreciated, and it'd be silly to try and police the definition of a shitpost, but....
 
Can you find everything wrong with this map? Some are obvious, some are subtle, some are in between.
Aight I'll give it a shot.
-The international borders of the contiguous US have been turned into straight lines, affecting states and provinces near them.
-Ohio no longer exists.
-The Panama Canal has been widened.
-Non-existing island between Brazil and Africa.
-All Mediterranean islands are gone (except Euboea).
-Saudi Arabia now has a south coast.
-Iraqi Kurdistan is independent.
-Belgium has been partitioned.
-Germany has East Prussia.
-Crimea is gone, and so is Istambul.
-Ceuta is Moroccan.
-Finland is a bit larger.
-Lake Ladoga is now a bay, Saint Petersburg's gone.
-Georgia reaches all the way to the Caspian.
-The Kuril and Sakhalin Islands are gone.
-Hainan is also gone.
 
Can you find everything wrong with this map? Some are obvious, some are subtle, some are in between.
  • Finland has Petsamo
  • US-Canada and US-Mexico borders are straight lines
  • Kaliningrad has been mirrored and given to Germany
  • India and Pakistan have their 2000 state borders
  • Crimea has sunk
  • All the islands in the Mediterranean have sunk
  • Yemen has sunk
  • The Bosporus is wider
  • Natural Suez and Panama canals
  • Michigan's Upper Peninsula to Wisconsin
  • Ohio has been partitioned
  • Belgium has been partitioned
  • Sakhalin has sunk
  • Georgia has part of Dagestan
 
View attachment 737397
Can you find everything wrong with this map? Some are obvious, some are subtle, some are in between.
I cheated using layer filters in GIMP.

US borders with Canada and Mexico are now straight lines
Mexican state of Quintana Roo has changed borders
New island between Brazil and Africa
Finland's territory is restored
Belgium partitioned
Konigsburg restored to Germany
Mediterranean islands and Crimea all erased
Yemen erased
Iraqi Kurdistan independent
Madagascar and Maldives moved
Artsakh erased
Nakhchivan to Armenia
North Caucasian territories in Russia to Georgia
Chhattisgarh rejoined to Madhya Pradesh
Northern Kerala to Tamil Nadu
Uttarakhand rejoined to Uttar Pradesh
(Did you fiddle with the other states of India, or was that part of the change between worlda 4.0 and 5.0?)
Sakhalin and Kurils erased
 
Some notes on the Uncanny Map:

New island in the Atlantic? That must have been an error.
I didn't do anything to India.
Yes, I moved Madagascar and the Maldives. I thought that one would be hard to catch.
Dang, I missed a Mediterranean island.
I think St. Petersburg is still here, or at least some parts.
Why does Japan look so weird without Sakhalin and the Kurils?
Iraqi Kurdistan isn't independent; it's water.
Ceuta Moroccan? Really?
 
straightlines.png


One day, all the earth's borders somehow miraculously changed. Every reference in every book, map, computer file, and so on was altered, and all border markers and points of entry were moved miraculously. Two messages were found in an alien language, carved into Antarctica. The UN, reasoning that this could only be the work of a higher intelligence, decided that these borders must be kept for the future of the human race.

A century later, the messages were finally deciphered.

Dear Urath,
I fixed all those squiggly borders. Kept the endpoints where they were, just straightened 'em out. A couple of countries got messed up, but I'm not responsible for bad country geometry.
Couldn't do anything about the coastlines, my ocean straightener is in my other truck. I can give you quotes for it, but it's not gonna be cheap.
-Jeff, Alliance for Straightening Borders

Dear Earth,
Sorry about the confusion, it seems I got the wrong planet by mistake, You can keep the borders, free of charge. Contact me if you want to fix those coastlines, I'll give a discount.
-Jeff
 

Crazy Boris

Banned
View attachment 737547

One day, all the earth's borders somehow miraculously changed. Every reference in every book, map, computer file, and so on was altered, and all border markers and points of entry were moved miraculously. Two messages were found in an alien language, carved into Antarctica. The UN, reasoning that this could only be the work of a higher intelligence, decided that these borders must be kept for the future of the human race.

A century later, the messages were finally deciphered.

Dear Urath,
I fixed all those squiggly borders. Kept the endpoints where they were, just straightened 'em out. A couple of countries got messed up, but I'm not responsible for bad country geometry.
Couldn't do anything about the coastlines, my ocean straightener is in my other truck. I can give you quotes for it, but it's not gonna be cheap.
-Jeff, Alliance for Straightening Borders

Dear Earth,
Sorry about the confusion, it seems I got the wrong planet by mistake, You can keep the borders, free of charge. Contact me if you want to fix those coastlines, I'll give a discount.
-Jeff

Bosnia: “It was bad enough the Croats took all our coastline, but this is ridiculous!”

Bangladesh: “You think you’ve got it bad? I have maybe 1/20 of my land left!”

Portugal: “Hey, anyone seen Nepal?”
 
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