Chapter 13, The Lion Gets its Teeth Back (Cont’d)
Excerpt from Where Did I Go Right? (or: You’re No One in Hollywood Unless Someone Wants You Dead), by Bernie Brillstein (with Cheryl Henson)
But building back MGM was proving to be a continuous running challenge. You couldn’t just release a single big pic and expect it all to work out from that point forward! Each success bred a need to keep up the momentum and every failure (like
Toys) was a stain you had to work hard to clean up. Thankfully, we’d made plenty of good contacts and allies, be they Amblin or Lucasfilm. But while MGM took the spotlight, I still had Hyperion to run, not to mention I was regularly getting asked to support Fantasia productions. Jim, for example, convinced us to take a chance on a PolyGram film for Fantasia by an effects guy named
A Gnome Named Gnorm. I was dubious, but then again, I fully expected
Spaced Invaders and
Killer Klowns from Outer Space, both the creations of effects guys, to crash and burn, so what the hell?
Well, guess what happened?
Yea, hard crash.
But also, we had our contacts with As You Wish, who brought us plenty of TV and film opportunities, not all of which we could handle despite increasing our production footprint into Orlando at the new studios there. We had to put the pause on William Goldman’s
A Very Good Year for yet another year in its long life and had to turn down
Honeymoon in Vegas (which went to Columbia) and instead followed through with a Sandra Bullock helmed Rom-Com
Mr. Right Now for Hyperion, which turned out to be a dud, as did Billy Crystal’s
Mr. Saturday Night.
But we did get an option on the Rob Reiner helmed
A Few Good Men, based on an Aaron Sorkin play. It involved a court case by Navy JAG lawyers, and Rob wanted Jack Nicholson, who wanted five million bucks. I was dubious, even with Rob involved, so I called up Dave Lazer in New York and sent him to check out the play. He called me back the next day. “Do it,” is all he said.
We brought in Nicholson, who actually proved well worth the price. Even he said it was one of the few times he was worth the price he commanded! Poor Chris O’Donnell and Jodie Foster[1] never stood a chance as the two hero-lawyers! Jack ate them and everything else alive and crapped gold, getting nominated for an Oscar for his performance.
Sometimes a film lands in your lap. Diana Birkenfield convinced me to greenlight a women’s baseball film by Penny Marshall called
A League of their Own. Ron Miller was enthralled by the idea, and he urged me to greenlight it alongside a little kid’s hockey film I had low expectations for named
The Mighty Ducks by a young scriptwriter named Steve Brill (no relation to Fran) and yet both proved to be breakout successes. Tom Hanks led the former and Judge Reinhold for the latter. Reinholdt, in turn, managed to sell me on a production of the Carl Hiaasen novel
Tourist Season, that he’d been trying to launch since ’86, which we handed to Joel and Ethan Coen, who turned it into a fun horror-comedy that ended up with an R-rating but made bank . Joel joked it was also a "sports film", at least from the perspective of the killer!
One of these films is not like the others...or is it?
But it’s never that simple when you work for Disney, where the parks are bringing in about five billion bucks to the studios’ one billion, and the latter starts to feel more like a promotional campaign for the former at times. And the truth is that for all of their differences in rating and target audience, the two sports films were a great compliment for the new Disney Good Sports Resort, so we got a lot of promotional backing from Jack Lindquist and Dick Nunis, who wanted to see Ron Miller’s big dream made a reality. We were able to do a lot of filming right there for both films. We even leveraged some government funds under Title 9 to spin up girls’ sports using
League as a promotional vessel. You won't believe who ultimately became our patron there! Rosie O’Donnell, one of the films’ stars, was eager to help out there as well, even as she ended up clashing with Dick and later our external patron on many occasions.
Fun times.
And that’s just a peak at the wrangling that you do in production. You get lucky, having a film fall in your lap. Sometimes that film leads to other films or other opportunities you couldn't have imagined. You go whole-hog to sponsor a “can’t miss” like
Mr. Right Now or
Mr. Saturday Night. You make hard choices, sometimes producing
A Few Good Men, and sometimes producing
A Gnome Named Gnorm. And sometimes a forgettable pee wee hockey film starring an ex-Brat-Packer is a hit when the clever film by a comedy legend instead crashes and burns. No way to know, so you keep swinging knowing you won’t hit them all.
But you keep at it, and you love what you do.
And that, in a nutshell, is show business.
[1] In our timeline it went to Castle Rock’s partner Columbia, who chose Tom Cruise and Demi Moore, two sex symbols at the height of their sexy. Nicholson still ate them alive.