The Pirate's Chance - Russian Submarine For Sale

The thread Why aren' there any pirate submarines? let me remember the story below from a few years ago. All we have to do is wait for the next Russian sub to pop-up on eBay & then sail the seven seas in search of adventure & plunder....

-----------------------

Russian Sub For Sale (for $1M on eBay)

News/Current Events News
Source: UPI
Published: 12/21/99
Posted on 12/21/1999 09:30:33 PST by ironman
MIAMI, Dec. 21 (UPI) - A Russian submarine that once prowled the U.S.
East Coast is for sale on the Internet, just in time for Christmas.

EBay, the Internet auction company, is offering the Juliett-class sub
Tuesday for $1 million, or best offer.

"You could call it the ultimate Christmas present for someone who
has everything," said Alexander Sheftman, a Russian businessman who is
trying to get rid of the vessel.

The submarine and a few other Julietts first became available in 1994
as the result of the end of the Cold War.

Sheftman said the diesel-powered sub was one of 16 built in the 1960s
used to patrol the western Atlantic during the Cold War. It is one of
the largest ever made and the only submarine designed by a woman
engineer.

Each was equipped with four 2,200-pound nuclear warheads on cruise
missiles, 22 torpedoes and a hard rubber shell designed to foil sonar
detection.

The sub is currently docked at St. Petersburg, Fla., where Sheftman
and his SubExpo Ltd. last week settled for a $92,000 payment for a
year's docking fees. The sub had been a museum and restaurant at
Helsinki, Finland, for three years and then was leased to a Canadian
firm that towed it to St. Petersburg for use as a museum.

But after a stormy transatlantic trip, shallow water prevented it
from its dock at the main pier. It was docked at the St. Petersburg port
and then suffered a ruptured ballast tank during another unsuccessful
attempt to move it to the pier.

The Canadian company declared bankruptcy and Sheftman and SubExpo got
the sub back.

Sheftman says he has had no bids, but there has been interest
expressed by a Palm Beach, Fla., woman.

"It's fair to say we haven't had a Russian submarine on eBay," said
Kristin Seuell, a spokeswoman for the auction site. "We've really never
had anything quite like this."

-------------

So WI someone bought such a sub & began using it for nefarious endeavours, whether it be open piracy akin to the wonts of many AH.comers, to smuggling pot from Canada into the USA...

You can't sell that thing in a US port. The CIA/FBI/NSA will confiscate it in a heartbeat, even pre-9/11/01. A better option is to sell it from a port of a rogue state.

I don't know why it hasn't been done. I guess buying the ammo (torpedoes) is a little difficult.

Adamanteus said:

You can't sell that thing in a US port. The CIA/FBI/NSA will confiscate it in a heartbeat, even pre-9/11/01. A better option is to sell it from a port of a rogue state.

I don't know why it hasn't been done. I guess buying the ammo (torpedoes) is a little difficult.

Click to expand...

My guess is that it had its torpedo tubes sealed anyways. If the Russians wanted to sell it as a weapon they would have sold it to some country not on Ebay.

All right, so the sub hasn't got any weapons per se. But what about the other line of pirate employment - that of smuggling? Tons of Canadian weed or other drugs from South America could be brought into the USA with little regard to the authorities...

Smuggeling submarine

That sub would be too big, and easily detectable by the USN.
The Columbian drug cartels were building a sub half way up a mountain somewhere, planning on bringing it down to the sea, presumably for slipping frugs into the US below the Coast Guard.
I don't recall any other details, sadly.

USN stop the sub? They can't even stop all the speed boats bringing in the drugs now...

DMA said:

USN stop the sub? They can't even stop all the speed boats bringing in the drugs now...

Click to expand...

Subs are MUCH easier. Unless it is a US or Allied sub heading to US waters it can be up to no good. A speedboat is just another speedboat and is 99 out 100 times just fishermen or something. We can't stop every speedboat but we CAN stop every submarine.

Brilliantlight said:

Subs are MUCH easier. Unless it is a US or Allied sub heading to US waters it can be up to no good. A speedboat is just another speedboat and is 99 out 100 times just fishermen or something. We can't stop every speedboat but we CAN stop every submarine.

Click to expand...

But they have to detect it first. That's harder to do that spotting a speeding boat on the surface. So it could make several journeys, making millions of dollars, before it's ever detected. I'd say the $1 million eBay purchase cost is well & truly recovered.

Besides, there's plenty of territorial waters other than the USN to seek safe harbor. Do you really think that the USN will fire upon a sub in say Cuban waters - even a pirate sub?

DMA said:

But they have to detect it first. That's harder to do that spotting a speeding boat on the surface. So it could make several journeys, making millions of dollars, before it's ever detected. I'd say the $1 million eBay purchase cost is well & truly recovered.

Besides, there's plenty of territorial waters other than the USN to seek safe harbor. Do you really think that the USN will fire upon a sub in say Cuban waters - even a pirate sub?

Click to expand...

The SOSUS system was designed to detect top of the line Soviet subs all the way to ICELAND. They can detect a whale's heatbeat at 20 miles, they damn well can detect a poorly maintained and driven sub. And yes we would fire on a sub in Cuban waters if it was raiding US commerce or that of any of our allies. What would Castro do about it? Whine?

Brilliantlight said:

The SOSUS system was designed to detect top of the line Soviet subs all the way to ICELAND. They can detect a whale's heatbeat at 20 miles, they damn well can detect a poorly maintained and driven sub. And yes we would fire on a sub in Cuban waters if it was raiding US commerce or that of any of our allies. What would Castro do about it? Whine?

Click to expand...

Yeah but the sub will be in the Gulf of Mexico not Iceland.

I'd imagine Castro will invade the USA as the timing for an invasion couldn't be better as most of the US military is in Iraq.

DMA said:

Yeah but the sub will be in the Gulf of Mexico not Iceland.

I'd imagine Castro will invade the USA as the timing for an invasion couldn't be better as most of the US military is in Iraq.

Click to expand...

LOL, we have sonar systems on all coasts! Do you think we would allow the Russians or anyone else have the ability to sneak past us in the Gulf of Mexico? As far as Cuba invading the US, give me a break! I doubt that the Cuban army could handle the Florida National Guard not talking about all the units still left in the US. Also how are they going to get here? Swim? The moment Cuba sends out troops transports headed towards the US is the moment they have them slaughtered by US subs and planes in the Gulf of Mexico! After which some of the army goes off and crushes Cuba.

Brilliantlight said:

LOL, we have sonar systems on all coasts! Do you think we would allow the Russians or anyone else have the ability to sneak past us in the Gulf of Mexico? As far as Cuba invading the US, give me a break! I doubt that the Cuban army could handle the Florida National Guard not talking about all the units still left in the US. Also how are they going to get here? Swim? The moment Cuba sends out troops transports headed towards the US is the moment they have them slaughtered by US subs and planes in the Gulf of Mexico! After which some of the army goes off and crushes Cuba.

Click to expand...

Sonars? Well that hasn't stopped the current drug smugglers let alone whoever wants to grab a boat in Cuba & arrive on Miami Beach a day or so later...

I gather the Cuban troops do what the boat people do now. By the time the US authorities know what's happening half of Florida is Cuban. Oh wait, isn't that already the case?

And how is Cuba going to get crushed when the USA military is mostly in Iraq?

DMA said:

Sonars? Well that hasn't stopped the current drug smugglers let alone whoever wants to grab a boat in Cuba & arrive on Miami Beach a day or so later...

I gather the Cuban troops do what the boat people do now. By the time the US authorities know what's happening half of Florida is Cuban. Oh wait, isn't that already the case?

And how is Cuba going to get crushed when the USA military is mostly in Iraq?

Click to expand...

Boats are one thing as they can have any number of legitimate reasons for heading to Florida but subs are another.

Last time I checked you need rifles, ammo, tanks and artilary to invade a country the size of the US. Hard to hide from planes or even spy satalites that can read license plates from cars thousands of miles up.

The US military >>> Cuban military particularly after Castro would do anything as crazy as to try and invade Florida. There would be a major recruitment drive if need be.

Brilliantlight said:

Boats are one thing as they can have any number of legitimate reasons for heading to Florida but subs are another.

Last time I checked you need rifles, ammo, tanks and artilary to invade a country the size of the US. Hard to hide from planes or even spy satalites that can read license plates from cars thousands of miles up.

The US military >>> Cuban military particularly after Castro would do anything as crazy as to try and invade Florida. There would be a major recruitment drive if need be.

Click to expand...

This maybe completely so. But you're forgetting one major factor. Other than the fact that Castro is a pirate, think about it - put a parrot on his shoulder & he is the quintessential pirate -Castro will have friends...

Doctor What will invade from the north, along with his hordes of pot smoking Canadian Pirates, but you'll also have a Fifth column lead by Stratha.

The USA is thus doomed...