Ireland Challenge (semi-serious)

Discussion in 'Alternate History Discussion: Before 1900' started by Thande, Nov 15, 2007.

  1. Thande Toujours Phrais

    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2005
    Location:
    Doncaster/Sheffield
    (For Leej ;) ).

    Your challenge, should you choose to accept it, is to make the history of Ireland as close as possible to how some Americans apparently think it is, with plausible justifications.

    I.e., the only thing stopping a Gaelic-speaking world empire spreading out from Eire is the perfidy of the eeeeeevil English.

    Your POD can be as far back as you want, because God knows you're going to need it :D
     
  2. Nekromans Mernber

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2006
    Location:
    Leicester
    May I humbly suggest that the harp is required as the national symbol?
     
  3. Thande Toujours Phrais

    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2005
    Location:
    Doncaster/Sheffield
    And the shamrock.

    And possibly a pint of Guinness.
     
  4. Nekromans Mernber

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2006
    Location:
    Leicester
    Well, obviously the Guinness.

    Perhaps we could have Super-English Anti-Celtic Bad-Nazis in power and attempt a parallel of the holocaust? (I sounded like a Japanese anime then, didn't I?) Maybe it's proven that the English caused the potato famine by their presence on the sacred isle?

    More seriously, maybe my attempts at Islamic Ireland could come to fruition, and the English could be even more Irish-Killing to try and get rid of the Oirish Mahometans!
     
  5. Nekromans Mernber

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2006
    Location:
    Leicester
    In case my Loyal Readers (all three of them) didn't realise it, that was a sign that I am seriously considering going back to Al-Eyir, but need some help on how the hell to get there. Any suggestions?
     
  6. NapoleonXIV Banned

    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2004
    Location:
    America, Home of the fee and the knave
    Oliver Cromwell, before he dies, has been reading about Tokugawa Japan. Seeing the Sagoku as the possible solution to the Irish problem (they've just started another revolution, which he's again just put down, with another few massacres), he places them in charge of his most ruthless lieutenants just before he shuffles off the mortal coil with instructions to follow the model of the 'country in chains' as closely as possible.

    In the next decade Ireland is completely cut off from the outside world, and with the restoration that includes England itself. Ireland is now ruled by a ruthless Lord Protector, a Shogun, but without the Shogun's normal tendency and motivation to be a nice guy:p

    Cut to 1814 when the invading Americans overthrow the Crown and liberate Ireland:p:D. What would Ireland be like after 200 years of total oppression and absolute isolation?
     
  7. Tyr air in space

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2004
    Location:
    欧州
    Stop the invention of beer.
    Why should we conquer the world when we've got guiness? :D
     
  8. Valdemar II Banned

    Joined:
    Jul 26, 2005
    Location:
    Copenhagen; the Kalmar Union
    Yes clearly the German have shown that people with beer are some of the most peaceful people in the world.
     
  9. NapoleonXIV Banned

    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2004
    Location:
    America, Home of the fee and the knave
    AA...but they have none of our Irish whisky. Beer, y'know, will just rust your Irishman's iron stomach, whisky pickles it.
     
  10. Canis Lupus Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 26, 2007
    Location:
    Behind a Cash Register
    There was a Family Guy episdoe that had this exact same joke.


    And, Thande, its not Americas fault that England is sooo very evvvvvvvvvviiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiillllll...................
     
  11. rcduggan 大元帅

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2007
    Location:
    New England Democratic Republic
    a meteor shower kills everyone but the irish.

    at the same time, we ride our leprechaun space ships to colonize the world. and drink Guinness.
     
  12. DMA I am not the Final Cylon!

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2004
    Location:
    Australia
    How about the Irish are Protestant whilst the English are all Catholics... ;)
     
  13. randomkeith Banned

    Joined:
    Nov 15, 2007
    Location:
    Minjar
    Heathen Ireland

    How about a senario were by St. Patrick was unable to bring Christianity to the Emerald Isle, and as a result the Irish pagans form an alliance with the heathen Scotts and are easily able to over run and enslave their peacefull Christian neighbours in England.
     
  14. Rocano Banned

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Location:
    Crooklyn, Park Slope Dope
    You suck even as a joke thats insensitive
     
  15. Rocano Banned

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2007
    Location:
    Crooklyn, Park Slope Dope
    Hugh Oneills Rebellion suceeds Irish get on good terms with Catholic Nations Irish Send Sailors and settle North East America
     
  16. Farfromhome Miss Saudi Arabia runner-up

    Joined:
    Feb 4, 2007
    Ha apparently you all have not realized it yet, but there is a an Irish Empire that rules the world. Its called the US of A.
     
  17. Hobelhouse The Cyberpunk Future is Now

    Joined:
    Nov 11, 2006
    Location:
    Chicago
    Dude, lighten up. And I say this as a guy who has an O' in front of his name. ;)
     
  18. Oweno Banned

    Joined:
    Nov 10, 2007
    The Irish Colonized Scotland
     
  19. Wanderlust I practically AM the military.

    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2006
    Location:
    Directus, Ustio
    I've done a set of stories based on a timeline like this :D

    But I won't post them on here because I want to publish them :p
     
  20. mutt Paddywhacker of time

    If there's one thing the Irish do, it's we do humour well, even on ourselves...lighten up, Old Irish guy in the Simpsons voice:shur it's all in good fun.:D