Diaries of the Doofus King - A King George IV Timeline (1783 to 1830)

Chapter 40

Oh, my roses were beautiful this year. How sad to see them withering in the winter.

King Augustus I of Great Britain

London

The Duke of Sussex, sixth son of George III and Charlotte of Mecklinberg, was reposing with his mistress and their four daughters. Sussex considered himself most fortunate to have found such a sympathetic woman to share his life. Good-natured and sensible.

Unlike his brothers, the Duke of Sussex was asthmatic and deemed unsuitable for a military career and largely spent the past 25 years of war quietly pursuing his interests in religion and science (the Duke did not find them incompatible in any manner). More of an academic than a zealot, the Duke enjoyed studying Hebrew and expanding his various modest collections of manuscripts and books.

The quiet life had been good to the Duke. He'd always felt that he'd let his father down with his weak constitution. Fortunately, the ascendance of his brother to the throne allowed Sussex to do what he pleased and settle down to a quiet life with his mistress and family.

The events of recent months had come as a shock. First, the news of his brother's "marriage" to Mrs. Fitzherbert. Well, maybe that wasn't a shock but rumored for years. But the assignation of his brother the King, then the defacto Civil War between his nephew and his other brothers, had shaken Sussex to the core. Then his nephew was killed in battle. Rumors regarding Frederick and Ernest returning to seize London were rife. All through it, virtually no one bothered to even approach Sussex for his sympathies. Other men would be insulted to be deemed to irrelevant. It made Sussex happy.

Sussex was directing his servants in the process of preparing his modest townhouse in London for winter when the steady clack of hooves approached his door. Peering out the window, Sussex witnessed dozens of British regulars dismounting. Confused, the Duke opened the front door. He felt some trepidation that perhaps he was about to be arrested.

He recognized two of the officers from court. Arthur Wellesley and Edward Pakenham, both Irish lords whom had been dispossessed of their lands in the Emerald Isle. But weren't they reportedly on opposite sides of this conflict? Why would they be together?

Certain he was to be arrested for his lack of support for one side or another, the Duke of Sussex was astounded when the pair of soldiers knelt to one knee at the sight of him.

"Your Lordship, we regret to inform you of the deaths of your brothers, King Frederick two weeks ago and King Ernest but two days ago," Pakenham uttered with practiced ease, as if he had repeated the statement many times in his head. He subtly nodded to his brother-in-law, Wellesley.

"The King is Dead. God Save the King!"

As the Duke of Sussex wavered on his heels, the cry was repeated again and again by the remainder of the officers.
 
What's the government of Ireland look like? The deposed Duke of Savoy, Charles? A native dynasty? A French King? A Republic? I know you said the latter wasn't necessarily the inevitable goal.
 
Chapter 41

I have no idea what I am doing. Sixth sons are never supposed to be King.

King Augustus I of Great Britain (and Ireland)

December 25th, 1813

Dublin

Marshall Ney bowed graciously as the new King and Queen emerged from the Emperor's personal yacht on Christmas Day. Queen Maria Beatrice (to be known to history as the "Christmas Queen") was, in fact, third in line after her uncle and her father for the legitimate Jacobite claim to Ireland's (and nominally Great Britain's) throne. However, the House of Savoy was utterly hostile to France and all things Revolution and it was impossible to think either of those men would be pliable enough for the throne. Conquering the House of Savoy's country of Piedmont-Sardinia and annexing to France would not likely create a fond ally. Fortunately, Ireland did not possess any strong Salic Law that would prevent a woman from inheriting the throne and the eldest daughter was deemed reasonable enough to deal with.

As it was, it had taken nearly a year of negotiations with the Irish to get to this point. Normally, Emperor Napoleon I did not negotiate with anyone. However, so much of a premium did he place on the Irish alliance that the Emperor actually bent a little. He did not try to accounce who would be the next King of Ireland or dictate terms. This was probably difficult to accept but in the end, the Corsican knew nothing could pain the British more than the scene occurring today. That made it all worthwhile.

Much like Great Britain, Ireland had a Parliamentary tradition and the people would not accept a dictator. Indeed, the new King and Queen were little more powerful than this new King Augustus in Britain. However, the Emperor was able to strong-arm the teenage girl (a virtual prisoner in France with her family) into a marriage with his recently widowed former son-in-law, Prince Eugene. The Emperor had been promising Eugene a throne for years, something that looked less likely after the Emperor divorced Eugene's mother. Fortunately, the Italian princess was pretty enough and Eugene seemed willing to abide by the terms agreed.

The Parliament of Ireland accepted the Legitimate Heiress to the House of Stuart in "co-dominion" with her husband, Prince (now King) Eugene. Their power in Ireland would be limited, much more so than most European monarchs, which was preferable to the new Irish Parliament. Indeed, the new government mirrored their former British master in most respects.

Ireland remained in a state of unrest. Most of the Protestants, both Anglican and Presbyterian, had grave reservations about the return of the House of Stuart. However, the Catholic Majority of Ireland, backed by 20,000 French troops, ensured that there was little the Protestants could do about it.

At least the Irish leadership was wise enough to reduce dissent by writing into the Constitution freedom of religion for Presbyterians, Lutherans and Jews. Notably, the Anglicans were not included into this new spirit of equality. For centuries, the Catholics of Great Britain and Ireland had been oppressed through the justification that Catholics owed fealty to a power other than their King (the Pope in Rome) and thus cannot be trusted. As the Church of England is governed by the King of England, the Irish simply turned this around in order to exclude Anglicans from various centers of power.

The Anglican and, to a lesser extent, Presbyterian exodus continued. Within a year of the peace, over 100,000 Anglicans fled or were expelled by the new Irish government, mostly to Britain or to various British colonies. In an effort to settle South America with English-speakers, the British government subsidized this colonization with free transport for hundreds of thousands of Irish and English over the following decade, permanently changing the demographics of South America. This would continue for years as Ulster was slowly reclaimed by Catholic migration northwards and eastwards. Not all of this was politically motivated. Many of the Protestant linen weavers and ship builders of Ulster were out of work and found migration a necessity.

The economic effects of the separation of Great Britain and Ireland would take its toll on both nations. Massive lawsuits were filed on behalf of absentee British landlords. Most were dismissed by the courts on one pretext or another. Lands intended to be redistributed to tenants were often politically funneled to Irish power-brokers. For years after the division, Ireland would endure economic instability.

March, 1814

London

First Lord of the Treasury Lord Grey sighed, wondering how the hell he was going to keep this coalition together. The election called by King Augustus I of Great Britain (and Ireland, sigh) was unique in recent memory as the King publicly refused to use any of the secret funds to "influence" voters towards his favored candidates. To the First Lord's best opinion, the King had attempted to remain as apolitical as possible.

The Whigs had won a majority, though not a commanding one. Grey was forced to bring in some moderate Tories into the government. There weren't very many moderates on either side after the civil war. Fortunately, the King did not appear interested in retribution. Pardons were issued to all members of the conflict. Grenville, however, was quietly asked to stand down in favor of Grey.

There was some question as to how history would remember the various men involved in the combat. Would "George V" be condemned as a usurper or the legitimate King? The House of Commons voted in favor. The Lords did not. As best Grey could see, King Augustus didn't give a damn either way. Finally tired of the whole business, the King commanded that "George V" to be viewed as an "interim" King until Frederick I's coronation and bade the nation to shut up about the matter.

As it was, King Augustus would prove a popular King. Though mild-mannered in spirit, the man proved a good man of business in that he actually sat down and listened when his Prime Ministers wished to speak. His elder brother George IV could seldom be bothered. Slowly, the monarchy would regain some of its lost respectability under the devoted family man (though his daughters were bastards). Fortunately, the Duke of Cambridge would soon return from his posting in British North America and marry a German princess. His line would inherit the throne and ensure the continuance of the House of Hanover.

The Winter of 5 Kings would go down in history as a shameful period. If anything, the new First Lord was grateful the incident was resolved so quickly that France was not able to intervene in any manner. The Royal Navy continued to sit in the English Channel as the war raged in London. Trade actually continued almost unabated. Though the nation convulsed, the Empire moved on as if unaware of the battle (in some areas, the war was over before news even reached the outskirts). Grey wondered if he should be concerned with this.

As it was, the London markets were shaken even further, proving that future conflicts with France may prove even more devastating. Fortunately, the peace seemed to be holding. Trade was picking up with the whole of Europe as pent-up demand for British goods was released. Unemployment went from awful to merely bad. Tax revenues increased. Grey was certain he could keep the Empire together long enough for the wounds to heal.

It was only a matter of time.

Washington DC

President Aaron Burr was enjoying the brief respite from normal politics. Indiana, Illinois and Louisiana would soon be entering the Union as equal states and the southern states were experiencing remorse at agreeing to the expansion. As expected, many southern Congressmen now wanted to go back on the deal banning slavery west of the Mississippi. However, Burr was adamant that the Missouri, Colorado, Iowa, Wisconsin and Arkansas territories would remain free in perpetuity.

Fortunately, Mr. John Jacob Astor, the wealthy trader, distracted the President with a unique proposal. Astor had taken up the claims of a Russian functionary to the northern island of the Hawaiian chain as a way station for his China trade. As no nation would recognize this, Astor wanted the United States government to assume command.

With the profits of the China trade apparent, Burr was willing to listen. He also noted that the whaling industry was dying in the north Atlantic but still growing in the Pacific. This would make an ideal base for American trade expansion to Asia as a whole. Indeed, he was also receiving a proposal for establishing American settlements on the large islands of the south Pacific, namely Diemen's Land, the Zealand Islands and possibly the eastern coast of Terra Australus.

Both the Dutch Republic and France had tiny, moribund colonies on the large island (though the French may have abandoned theirs, no one was sure), but that island was reportedly the size of the United States. America would not hesitate to put up a trading post on such a huge mass because a few thousand Europeans were hundreds or thousands of miles away on the same island. He strongly suspected that, had Britain not been forbidden by treaty to possess colonies east of India that Britain's powerful navy and trade interests would quickly dominate the region.

Seeing no harm, Burr agreed to put the matter to Congress.

As it was, whaling and sealing were profitable at the moment so Burr was willing to play a bit of Empire building himself.
 
American Australia is a go people!

This was always one of my favorite divergences. I never saw the colonization of Australia in 1788 to 1825 as a given. There was little immediate reason to place a colony there. The prisoner thing always seemed a little odd and likely to be cancelled if there had been a change in government.

Both the Dutch and the French staked claims. In this TL, I have modest colonies on the Island but probably not as in depth as Britain would do, opening the door for eventual American involvement.
 

longsword14

Banned
This was always one of my favorite divergences. I never saw the colonization of Australia in 1788 to 1825 as a given. There was little immediate reason to place a colony there. The prisoner thing always seemed a little odd and likely to be cancelled if there had been a change in government.

Both the Dutch and the French staked claims. In this TL, I have modest colonies on the Island but probably not as in depth as Britain would do, opening the door for eventual American involvement.
Napoleon is not interested in settler colonies? As far as I can see it is the only place other than the western coast of NA that is vacant enough to allow for colonisation. The french would still have the demographic problems as OTL, wouldn't they?
 
Napoleon is not interested in settler colonies? As far as I can see it is the only place other than the western coast of NA that is vacant enough to allow for colonisation. The french would still have the demographic problems as OTL, wouldn't they?

I would think that any new French colony in the Americas would be very difficult to survive against opposition by the British, American, probably Spanish and the newly liberated (Mexico) nations. I'll get more into that later.

In the end, the French just were not colonizers like the British or Portuguese (who had the highest % of home population leave for the colonies over the centuries), or even the Spanish or Dutch. In OTL, really only Algeria received a large number of French colonists. That is the direction that France will be going in this TL.

Another key component is the much-discussed demographic collapse of France from 1810 to 1900 relative to other European nations. In the end, many French simply didn't want to leave France. Even Algeria was largely considered part of Metropolitan France. It must be something cultural.

In this TL, I have some French colonies in Australia but I would not think they would necessarily prosper or receive a large amount of colonists.
 

longsword14

Banned
I would think that any new French colony in the Americas would be very difficult to survive against opposition by the British, American, probably Spanish and the newly liberated (Mexico) nations. I'll get more into that later.

In the end, the French just were not colonizers like the British or Portuguese (who had the highest % of home population leave for the colonies over the centuries), or even the Spanish or Dutch. In OTL, really only Algeria received a large number of French colonists. That is the direction that France will be going in this TL.

Another key component is the much-discussed demographic collapse of France from 1810 to 1900 relative to other European nations. In the end, many French simply didn't want to leave France. Even Algeria was largely considered part of Metropolitan France. It must be something cultural.

In this TL, I have some French colonies in Australia but I would not think they would necessarily prosper or receive a large amount of colonists.
The problem with France remains the same as always, still someone higher up may like to push for it even though it would not be successful. Also, the vaunted American opposition to colonisation of the western coast is not enough to stop a european power.
 
The problem with France remains the same as always, still someone higher up may like to push for it even though it would not be successful. Also, the vaunted American opposition to colonisation of the western coast is not enough to stop a european power.
True, but how would they get there?

The French have no bases in the new world and I don't think Spain would be happy with France deciding to take over their claim to California, even when Mexico was under rebellion. It would be enormously expensive to create a new colony in western North America with no clear benefit. Meanwhile, the benefits of conquering Algeria and Southeast Asia are more real, as is the promise of trade with China.

If anything, France would probably find Australia an easier place to reach.
 
I forget - obviously Napoleon had his way with the Ottomans and Egypt, but was the latter retained for France?
 
Chapter 42

I honest to god have no idea what to say to the people. No one trained me how. I was simply supposed to fade away to history, a forgotten son of George III.

Now I rule an Empire that spans the globe.

The nation continues to heal, albeit slowly. The loss of Ireland remains devastating to so many great families. It would be no less horrible to see the Midlands be torn from the nation.

However, I believe that peace must be maintained. Though I lack any knowledge of accounts, I fear that Britain is in dire straights. Without the trade from our Empire, the Home Islands (the Home Island) would be bankrupt. Ireland does not appear to be rushing to return to the fold. Maybe it is best just to let the matter stand.

King Augustus I of Great Britain (and Ireland)



I know little of numbers. Apparently, the linen weavers are all out of work as they produced mainly for the British. Some in Parliament are pleased as most are Anglicans. However, the nation sold much of this product abroad. Ireland is poorer without them. And with the shipbuilders nearly all shut down as well...

I fear for the nation.

Mary III of Ireland (and England, Scotland and France)




A third son! What joy!

Also, Algiers had fallen and word had returned from the east. The King of Siam has agreed to a trade agreement. I'm sure we can...deepen...the relationship later.

Napoleon I of France






February 1814

Mexico City

Father Hidalgo only desired for his people to be free, not the mass slaughter that he beheld. Often visiting the front lines of the war, the priest was horrified by the suffering of the poorly equipped and trained Army of Mexico at the hands of the Spanish and their French allies. Monterrey had fallen. Within weeks, it appeared that the Capital of Mexico would be next.

The Priest prayed. And then prayed some more.

On March 1st, an American named Andrew Jackson and a Granadan name Francisco Miranda arrived at the head of 400 predominantly American volunteers.

Washington DC

President Aaron Burr occasionally wondered why he wanted the job but overall the nation was proceeding quite smoothly into the peace. Trade was picking up again. The British had long stopped harassing American ships at sea. It was a quiet secret that the peace treaty with Britain, though granting America a great deal of land, did nothing about the policy of impressment. It was the end of the war reducing the requirement that stayed the British hand, not American strength.

Still, that was Madison's legacy. Burr would forge his own.

Quiet inquires with the British government and the Hudson Bay Company had come to naught. Burr believed that the company was facing bankruptcy anyway. He only had to wait. In the meantime, he encouraged American settlement into the border areas that had been the purview of Company trappers and traders for decades. Soon these men would be vastly outnumbered by settlers.

Burr intended that America push the British of the vast northern plains sooner rather than later. Lacking any access from the St. Lawrence to the Columbia, the British traders and trappers were forced to transport goods to the Hudson Bay, a remarkably difficult route that was ice-blocked much of the year.

Burr, on a whim, travelled to New York Harbor where a unique fleet was assembling. Seeking additional ports for the long voyage east, Congress had approved the construction of a port town along the empty south-eastern edge of the southern continent. It would be a welcome outpost for whalers, sealers and traders. Burr had used the justification that American ports were required based upon the evidence of the past twenty-five years when both French and British harbors were closed to American shipping.

Burr had actually hired a foreigner, an English officer named Sidney Smith, to command the little fleet of three frigates and twenty smaller ships filled with construction material for facilities, soldiers, sailors, carpenters and provisions for over 400 colonists including a large number of Mennonites seeking a new place under God.

The destination?

A land explored over four decades ago by an English explorer named Cook, it was named by the sailor Stingray Harbor though later records would refer to it as Botany Bay. As Burr preferred the former, Stingray it would remain.
 
I forget - obviously Napoleon had his way with the Ottomans and Egypt, but was the latter retained for France?

He retained Egypt and the Levant. European Ottoman was taken by the rebelling Greeks and Bulgars. Anatolia is increasingly dominated by Russia. The Caucasus had already fallen to Russia (Armenia, Azerbaijan, Georgia, Trabizond).

Basically, Napoleon wanted to turn the Mediterranean into a French lake.
 

longsword14

Banned
What exactly did the French get out of Algeria in OTL? Also, Napoleon (and the French as a general rule) would have understood by now that settler colonies are needed for far flung off territories to hold them otherwise someone else will.
 
In this case, Algeria was a fertile agricultural region, a strategic base, the source of great manpower and I believe there was some mining there as well.

It was also much closer to the Metropolis and therefore easier to control.
 
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