Famous quotations that never were

[Berra]

Originally Posted by aktarian

"Holy shit, look at that ass. I have to get in his pants." Jack T. Chick, 1971

More lik tap-tap-taptap

"Mr Reagan. I will come to that city and start tearing down that wall in person... if you can lend me a sledgehammer, we didn't make this years production quota"
Gorby

[MrP]

There's something wrong with our damned ships today!

Admiral Franz Hipper on the explosion of the third of his battlecruisers during the Battle of Scarborough.

[Historyfan 92]

There is no God but God, and Jesus Christ is his son.- St. John of Mecca, often known by his birth name Muhammed, following his conversion.

Monarchy needs a constitution like a fire needs water.- Baron Leon Trotsky

Oh, who cares! It's just a damn Jungle!- Jean-Étienne Valluy, on Vietnam

Your plan seems fair and reasonable, and I will be happy to reign with you as an equal.- Alexander III of Macedon, I of Persia agreeing to Co-rule Persia with Darius III of Persia.

Ok, leave if you want to.- Pharoah to Moses

[Atreus]

"Cry Havoc, and let slip the dogs of War!!!"

Neville Chamberlin, October 1st, 1938

[Aozhouhuaren]

Not really a quote, but here goes. An AIM or MSN conversation.

DUBYA (08:50:11 AM): Hey, how its going, bro!
Osamanator (08:52:01 AM): Oh man its been really cool. Last night was fucking ace bro! was in the club got shitfaced and then there was fine honey checking me out bro. Smoking hot, blond, big titties, nice ass.
DUBYA (08:52:55 AM) : Holy Shit, right on, man, so did anything happen.
Osamanator (08: 54:30 AM): Hell yeh, got her home , banged the fuck out of her. You shoulda come with us, man, even your queer ass would have got someone. You know, even that fatass Rove got some honeys.
DUBYA (08:55.30 AM): Yeah yeah. He probably paid a shitload for their asses
Osamanator (08:56:00 AM): LOL, yeah, but don't we all.
DUBYA (08:56:20 AM):
Osamanator (08:57:08 AM): So, bro, why didnt ya go out?
DUBYA (08:58:15 AM): You know, Laura.
Osamanator (08:59:02 AM): Bro, that bitch got you pussywhipped.
DUBYA (08:59:30 AM): HEY! Dont talk about Laura like that!
Osamanator (09:01:06 AM): sorry,bro, but dude seriously you gotta get out once in a while, shes a control freak
DUBYA (09:02:45 AM): nah, bro, Laura aint that bad, shes pretty cool and you know me, I'm not into that clubbin stuff anymore.
Osamanator (09:03:31 AM): oh yeah, i doubt you be saying that if you got some of that good columbian up your nose.
DUBYA (09:04:49 AM): You know I quit that shit, Im tryin to stay clean
Osamanator (09:06:10 AM): yeah, yeah, I know, well hey man anyways I'm off, a man needs to make his money. You should call some time, we gotta hang out.
DUBYA (09:07:02 AM): yeah, cool, bro, will do. Cya

Osamanator signed off 9:08 AM 12/10/1995

(I was gonna do a Moqtada joins the conversation, but I couldn't be bothered Also I know it's not very plausible for 40 something year olds chatting like teenagers/young adults.)

[Abdul Hadi Pasha]

Originally Posted by Aozhouhuaren

Also I know it's not very plausible for 40 something year olds chatting like teenagers/young adults.)

Grrrrrrrrr.

[Aozhouhuaren]

Originally Posted by Abdul Hadi Pasha

Grrrrrrrrr.

What? Did I say something wrong. You "40 something year olds" (in your case Abdul 30 something year olds ) are mostly mature, possess knowledge of proper grammar and you can all spell decently if not perfectly most of the time. The way you express yourselves would also be in a more intelligent manner than a teenager or young adult.

[panzerjay]

after such a long journey, we lost our taste for indian - the donner party

[Fenwick]

Today we stand at the gates of civilization. Only we the righteous may enter, and hold back the horde who dares dismantle the glorious nation of Christian morality, and virtue.

– Stonewall Jackson August 7th, 1862 overlooking Washington DC

[Abdul Hadi Pasha]

I meant that you can't tell the difference between 40 and the 50-something and 60-something that bin Laden and Bush are. I guess all us dinosaurs are just all thrown into one bag full of useless.

Originally Posted by Aozhouhuaren

What? Did I say something wrong. You "40 something year olds" (in your case Abdul 30 something year olds ) are mostly mature, possess knowledge of proper grammar and you can all spell decently if not perfectly most of the time. The way you express yourselves would also be in a more intelligent manner than a teenager or young adult.

[maverick]

"Alas, Damascus...what a beautiful sight, what a beautiful last sight"
-Napoleon Bonaparte, during his last campaign at Syria...1799

Unrelated idea:

"If the Japanese can't accept a good deal when it's being offered to them, then we will have to instruct them on the nature of commerce and civility"
-Admiral Matthew Perry, before the American Intervention of 1853

"Just look at the fire...oh, the great fire...what have we done?"
-Perry on the Edo fire of 1853

[fortyseven]

Kill a duck, one is a hunter, kill a man; a murderer, kill a mime, a hero

Jean Rostand

The destruction of Hiroshima and Nagasaki by atomic bomb was the single worst event in American and Japanese history. I take total and absolute responsibility for the mutant hordes ravaging Japan and therefore I am resigning...

Harry Truman, October 15th, 1947

[The Sicilian]

Mwahahahaha! Flee, stupid peasants! Flea in terror from my mechanical monstrosities!!
~Karl Marx initiating the War on Poverty

[panzerjay]

you know, i wrote that high - Karl Marx on Das Kapital

[pa_dutch]

"The Holy Roman Empire is kind of holy... It's sort of Roman... And it's an empire in some respects... If you really think about it." - Voltaire

"Oh my God, you killed God. You bastards." - Nietzsche

"Mr. Reagan, tear down this wall!" - Mikhail Gorbachev

[arctic warrior]

Greenland was Danish, is Danish and will forever remain Danish...

Redbeard

[fortyseven]

Originally Posted by pa_dutch

"Oh my God, you killed God. You bastards." - Nietzsche

Excellent

[tallwingedgoat]

"Jesus Christ. I'm going to have to let you go."
--- Pontius Pilate

"You have woken China from it's sleep. Now it will shake the world."
--- Napoleon to Lord MaCartney.

"I came, I saw, I conquered."
--- Alexander the Great on India

"Together we will rule the Empire as father and son."
--- Julius Caesar to Brutus.

"On What Women Really Want"
--- Title of Sigmund Freud's last book

"We will bury you with manufactured goods."
--- Nikita Khruschev

"M = E/C²"
--- Albert Einstein

[aktarian]

Originally Posted by arctic warrior

Greenland was Danish, is Danish and will forever remain Danish...

Redbeard

"From now on this cursed island is called Doughnut." Sven the Bald

[Analytical Engine]

"There is no god but God, and Jesus is his prophet" - Emperor Constantine I