Famous quotations that never were

[Berra]

Al Gore is funny somehow.

"Please recount this vote"
- George Bush, loser

" I believe it is appropriate to have an over-representation of factual presentations on how dangerous the Iraqi weapons of mass destructions are, as a predicate for opening up the audience to listen to what the solutions are, and how hopeful it is that we are going to solve this crisis."
- Al Gore

"I've chosen to challenge the rule of law with a violent revolution."
- Al Gore

[Analytical Engine]

"I am the State" -- Charles I of England, Scotland and Ireland.

"I came, I saw, I got the t-shirt" -- Gaius Julius Caeser, about Britannia.

[htgriffin]

"Constantinople is well worth a Hajj"

Napoleon Bonaparte, shortly before his Coronation

[Thande]

"There is a special providence that smiles on fools, drunkards, and the Confederate States of America" - Bismarck.

[Chris Oakley]

"Of course I'm taking the Alabama job! You think I want to waste the prime of my coaching career dealing with Ricky Williams' melodrama and Jay Fiedler's lousy throwing arm?"--Nick Saban.

[Analytical Engine]

"Constantinople is worth a mass" - Ottoman Sultan Mehmed II.

[LordInsane]

Originally Posted by Analytical Engine

"Constantinople is worth a mass" - Ottoman Sultan Mehmed II.

I think that one has already been done, somewhere in this thread...

[Analytical Engine]

Originally Posted by LordInsane

I think that one has already been done, somewhere in this thread...

D'oh!

Ok, then:

"Jerusalem is worth a mass." -- king Richard I of England

[V-J]

Originally Posted by Berra

"I've chosen to challenge the rule of law with a violent revolution." - Al Gore

That one really cracks me up for some reason. I can just see Gore saying that one at a press conference.

[037771]

Oh my god, an assassin on the grassy knoll! Lee Harvey Oswald, time to be an American hero!
Lee Harvey Oswald before accidentally shooting dead JFK, Dallas 1963

[fortyseven]

Paris is well worth a massacre

Henri IV of France

[Berra]

"The graphic sex and the violence made it a good family movie. "
- Tipper Gore

[Roberto]

"This... is.... SPARTA!"

-Leonidas

[alt_historian]

Originally Posted by 037771

Oh my god, an assassin on the grassy knoll! Lee Harvey Oswald, time to be an American hero!
Lee Harvey Oswald before accidentally shooting dead JFK, Dallas 1963

Hey, it's not a Family Guy quotes thread...

"Don't be ridiculous. You couldn't hit an elephant at this distance. See, nothing happened!"

- Anonymous British general, on trench warfare.

[Rocano]

"Well that play sucked".- President Abraham Lincoln after seeing my American Cousin.

"Hell yeah Im a member of the Coommunist Party".-communists during the age of McCarthy.

" The National Socialists of Germany are Pig Swine and deviators of true Fascism".- Benito Mussolini, 1958

[CCA]

Originally Posted by Thande

"There is a special providence that smiles on fools, drunkards, and the Confederate States of America" - Bismarck.

Good one.

How about.

"There is a special providence that smiles on fools, drunkards and the United States of Central America"

-Bismarck speaking on the aftermath of the USCA-Mexican war in which the numerically small, grossly underfunded Federal Army managed to defeat the Mexican Army in the battle of Zihuataneo.

[Berra]

"Mr Deng. Tear down the Chinese wall"
- Gorby

[alt_historian]

"I've discovered a New World to the West! I've called it Columbusland!"

- Christopher Columbus, 1492

[Chris Oakley]

"Sighted German battleship--sank same."

Telegram to Prime Minister Winston Churchill from the captain of the HMS Hood shortly after Hood engaged and sank the Bismarck.

[LordInsane]

Die Französich bist unserer Freunde.
The German Emperor, 1914.
Meaning:
The French are our friends.

Misspelled, I know...