WI: Michael Bay did the star wars prequels

Emperor Palpatine · Nov 24, 2014

What if George Lucas died in the 90's and Michael Bay was hired to do the star wars prequels. How would the plots be? Better or worse than OTL? I'm guessing they would be full of explosions all the way through like in the transformers movies.

johnboy · Nov 24, 2014

Emperor Palpatine said:
What if George Lucas died in the 90's and Michael Bay was hired to do the star wars prequels. How would the plots be? Better or worse than OTL? I'm guessing they would be full of explosions all the way through like in the transformers movies.

Would it be possible for anyone, anyone at all, to have made a worse run of three movies? I think not....

Lalli · Nov 24, 2014

These would be totally terrible. Speciality if Jerry Bruckheimer produces these. Full of explosion and not any reasonable plot. Teens would love these surely but SW fans and critics would be furious.

PoeFacedKilla · Nov 24, 2014

Lalli said:
These would be totally terrible. Speciality if Jerry Bruckheimer produces these. Full of explosion and not any reasonable plot. Teens would love these surely but SW fans and critics would be furious.

hmm...

kind of sounds like the three movies I paid to see...
IMO, star wars has never been good. A New Hope would have been good as a one shot film.

Everything after it was nothing but about money, at least from my point of view.

johnboy · Nov 24, 2014

PoeFacedKilla said:
hmm...

kind of sounds like the three movies I paid to see...
IMO, star wars has never been good. A New Hope would have been good as a one shot film.

Everything after it was nothing but about money, at least from my point of view.

A man made a great movie. The sequel was good, the third movie acceptable. Then a gap. He resumes. The fourth is awful, the fifth excruciating, the sixth worse than that and so on. Loved the way in the first movie imperial stormtroopers shot everything that moved and hit it all. By the end if the series, you would not trust them to look after your coffee whilst you took a leak.

Rubicon · Nov 24, 2014

johnboy said:
Would it be possible for anyone, anyone at all, to have made a worse run of three movies? I think not....

Yes there is, two words:

Uwe Boll

Dan · Nov 24, 2014

No, he knows he's a joke and plays on it so at least they would have been funny.

As has been pointed out, the prequals were sad, with Bay at the helm they would have still been sad, but with bigger stompy AT-ATs and bigger explosions.
And more pokey nipples.

Dalriadan Archangel 21 · Nov 24, 2014

Dan said:
And more pokey nipples.

Mmmmmmmmmmm

TheShah · Nov 24, 2014

Dan said:
No, he knows he's a joke and plays on it so at least they would have been funny.

As has been pointed out, the prequals were sad, with Bay at the helm they would have still been sad, but with bigger stompy AT-ATs and bigger explosions.
And more pokey nipples.

I would enjoy that over what we got,

and hell even Jar Jar may have been half-tolerably stupid. or there could be a racist R2 droid, which may have been more preferable than a straight racist stereotype.

idk

PoeFacedKilla · Nov 24, 2014

Dan said:
No, he knows he's a joke and plays on it so at least they would have been funny.

As has been pointed out, the prequals were sad, with Bay at the helm they would have still been sad, but with bigger stompy AT-ATs and bigger explosions.
And more pokey nipples.

exactly, if i'm gonna watch a (should be) B-movie about war in space.
I want giant explosions, lots of death and hot alien babes.
Hardly any cool explosions, definitely no hot alien chicks.

To me, SW is like the USSR with A New Hope being WWII.
And it's lived off that success until it was just tiresome, and now a new regime has taken over

Mike Stearns · Nov 24, 2014

johnboy said:
Would it be possible for anyone, anyone at all, to have made a worse run of three movies? I think not....

Rubicon said:
Yes there is, two words:

Uwe Boll

Kill me. Kill me now.

Captain Lhurgoyf · Nov 24, 2014

Look at it this way: at least it's not Tommy Wiseau.

O hai Anakin, how's your sex life?

Dalriadan Archangel 21 · Nov 24, 2014

Captain Lhurgoyf said:
Look at it this way: at least it's not Tommy Wiseau.

O hai Anakin, how's your sex life?

Or Lars Von Trier!!!!

DG Valdron · Nov 24, 2014

Dalriadan Archangel 21 said:
Or Lars Von Trier!!!!

Hey, hands off. Lars Von Trier is hilarious.

Legend-in-Exile · Nov 24, 2014

Around 6 hours of Death Stars exploding?

Dalriadan Archangel 21 · Nov 24, 2014

DValdron said:
Hey, hands off. Lars Von Trier is hilarious.

LVT is many things - demented, damaged, depraved - but hilarious is not one of them.

casval · Nov 24, 2014

Rubicon said:
Yes there is, two words:

Uwe Boll

M night

Might even make the emperor Indian or something

DG Valdron · Nov 24, 2014

Dalriadan Archangel 21 said:
LVT is many things - demented, damaged, depraved - but hilarious is not one of them.

You are kidding right? Everything he does is tongue and cheek. He is like the three stooges crossed with ingmar Bergman. The man seems constitutionally unable to not be funny.

lionhead · Nov 24, 2014

i don't understand all the hating on the prequels. Epsiode III is one of the best movies i ever saw. Period. They should have remade the later Episodes too, with better actors and better CGI.

Emperor Palpatine · Nov 24, 2014

one thing to keep in mind is that with Michael Bay, there would be none of those boring senate scenes. We might also have got to see the Battle of Coruscant on the planet and not just the space battle. Think of all the carnage that a shit tonne of explosions would cause to Coruscant. It would be amazing.