ASB Extreme Makeover....

[Mr_ Bondoc]

Please consider the idea that much of history is pretty boring to teh general public for the simple reason that people don't find it "sexy or thrilling" enough. In the spirit of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition (ABC-TV) or The Swan (FOX-TV),or even Queer Eye for Straight Guy (BRAVO-TV) ASBs have given you free license to make certain events in history "more interesting". The only rule is that you must not violate any laws of science. They have given you those POD events that have been "beaten to death" to work on:

A) The American Revolution

B) The Roman Empire

C) American Civil War

D) World War I & II

E) Spanish Armada

F) The Crusades

[Imajin]

For D), give Austria-Hungary the 2005 USA's Nuclear Arsenal...

[Forum Lurker]

First, everything needs major love interests. We'll replace Martha Washington with the daughter of a British governor, preferably a rabidly anti-colonist man. Her brother will be one of the British generals, a man of deep and abiding honor who will fight for King and Parliament despite his personal feelings of sympathy for the rebels. Thomas Paine needs to be a minority, let's say a freed slave who converted to Judaism. He'll get martyred, that always boosts interest levels. We can throw in a few sabre duels, at least one of them on board a sinking, burning warship, for the action crowd.

[Mr_ Bondoc]

Suddenly the forms of celebrity judges Simon Cowell and Paula Abdul of American Idol (FOX-TV) appear in the studio for their first inspection. Paula Abdul, gushing with pride turns to the contestants and says,"You both did so well, I never thought I would see such good stuff...."

Simon Cowell shoves Paula Abdul out of the way saying,"Imajin, what's so @#$% sexy about nuclear weapons in Austria-Hungary?"

Paula Abdul injects Simon with his ritalin to calm him down...

Simon Cowell turns to Forum Lurker in a half dazed look, "I know many things, and I don't hate your work...It seems so dreamy this summer...."

[LordRuthven]

Have a medieval James Bond fighting Muslim warlords that threaten to over run Europe with dastardly schemes.

[Mr_ Bondoc]

Have a medieval James Bond fighting Muslim warlords that threaten to over run Europe with dastardly schemes.

Which James Bond are we talking about? Sean Connery? Roger Moore? Tomothy Dalton? Pierce Brosnan? Woody Allen?

(20 points to whomever discovers the logic behind this last one....)

As for warlords how do they "try and take over the world"?

[LordRuthven]

Which James Bond are we talking about? Sean Connery? Roger Moore? Tomothy Dalton? Pierce Brosnan? Woody Allen?

I meant Sean Connery the one and only James Bond.

As for warlords how do they "try and take over the world"?

Give them a superweapon that threatens the security of all Western Europe

[Mr_ Bondoc]

[QUOTE=LordRuthven]I meant Sean Connery the one and only James Bond.
Let me guess his code name "The Seventh Knight"

Give them a superweapon that threatens the security of all Western Europe

How about Saladin cackling as he holds onto the Holy Grail? Excalibur? or a recently resurrected Vlad Tepes....?

So, far, it could work, but it needs more details....

[LordRuthven]

Have mysterious oriental agents from Genghis Khan as third party...

[Mr_ Bondoc]

Have mysterious oriental agents from Genghis Khan as third party...

True Enough- But you have to also have ninjas (a.k.a. "Oriental assassins") and Ghengis Khan must speak in broken English like Yoda ,"World conquest... help you I can....!!"

[LordRuthven]

What about Aladin's lamp?

[Mr_ Bondoc]

What about Aladin's lamp?

Lord Ruthven- Well...it must remain unused and/or ambiguous. It may have dazzling CGI-style special effects (e.g. Raiders of the Lost Ark ). It also must either burn or kill small animals in its presence. The villian must also be killed in the process of utilizing the weapon, or at least be horribly disfigured. Finally the lamp must be hidden in a secret corner of a Vatican-supplied basement, while the credits roll.....

[LordRuthven]

Finally the lamp must be hidden in a secret corner of a Vatican-supplied basement, while the credits roll.....

What about the Tower of London? I mean it is James Bond...