ME Spoof

[reformer]

Glen Finney
This board is merely to discuss the possibility of a new ME. No one claim any countries. That being said, if anybody takes Montenegro, I'm going to personally kill you.

Du Quense
I'll take The United States of North and South America.

Glen Finney
No claiming.

Du Quense
Oh, and I'll take a Manchuria that controlls all of East Asia and Australia.

reformer
I'm confused. In this game, is land water, or is land lava, or is water land. . .

Glen Finney
Gosh people. . . IE seriosly messed up your geography. No posting!

Du Quense
Oh, and I'll take an Ottoman empire that controlls all of Europe (except the pyrannies), Africa, and west asia. Oh, and I'll take Andora.

Glen Finney
You do realise you just claimed the entire world.

Du Quense
Fine, someone else can take Andora.

No more time now. . . more to come

[Glen]

So far I'm lovin' it....and I'd only take Montenegro if I get the rest of the Dalmatian coast....BUT NO CLAIMING! ;) :D :D :D

[Aussey]

what about lil ole me? :eek: :(

[Justin Pickard]

Justin Pickard
Okay, I haven't quite finished every last detail of [Timeline X], but I'll claim [European Country Y] from [Timeline X], which has - so far - taken me several weeks of exhaustive research.

CUT TO: four weeks later

Justin Pickard
Damn, I keep getting confused between my ME nation and bits of the serious timeline. This is annoying. And, to make things worse, Lichenstein has just declared war on my ME nation.

CUT TO: four weeks after that

Justin Pickard (Basil Fawlty voice)
Right! That's it! I've finished with [Timeline X], but still lumbered with [European Country Y]. I can't take it any more! Civil war! Burning! Destruction! Anarchy! Random Socialist Uprisings! Zeppelins on fire! You lot can deal with the fallout.

CUT TO: four weeks later

Justin Pickard (tentatively)
I claim Lichenstein.

[Glen]

what about lil ole me? :eek: :(

Oh, don't worry. I am certain we will all be well represented.

[General_Paul]

lol. What about me Glen? *Suddenly gets an expansionist idea* I CLAIM NAZI GERMANY CIRCA 1942!Yeahhhhh that's right...its time for some expansion! And if all else fails...BIO-WAR!!!

[Glen]

lol. What about me Glen? *Suddenly gets an expansionist idea* I CLAIM NAZI GERMANY CIRCA 1942!Yeahhhhh that's right...its time for some expansion! And if all else fails...BIO-WAR!!!

But why is the leader named Adolf Finney? :eek: :eek: :eek:

[reformer]

General Paul posting of country

Nation: Costa Rica.

Government: Utilitarian whatever.

Army: 2 billion

nuclear copacity:
Enough to destroy the word 38 times. And then some.

POD: No logical POD. But I'm an old time player, so I get get away with anything.

Aussey

My nation, the United States of Arkansas and Malasia, under its devoted faithful following of Muhammed, would like to declare its new ruler: Mr. Bob Deguise. Will callhim big D for short. POD: Glen Finney didn't let me take the Cajuns, so I found an even more random nation.

Glen Finney
No claiming countries you idiots! Why do I even bother. *secretly is looking at a map of greatest possible Montenegran exspansions* I don't even want you to THINK about possible countries. *yes. . . we have a MANIFEST DESTINY to claim Mecca* No claiming. Anywhere. Especially the lower Arabian Penninsula.

[Glen]

The Montenegran government would have no designs or desires on Mecca!

However, we do have a sizable and influencial Albanian minority who practice Islam and feel it is the nation's duty to free that holy place from the tyrranical grip of (insert country here). *Sigh*, what can I do, we are ruled by the people and have to appease this vocal minority.

BUT NOT YET, WE HAVEN'T STARTED! That's just idle speculation...pay no attention to the Albanian volunteer army behind the curtain.... ;)

[Aussey]

To: Costa Rice
From: Malaysia-Arkansas

You suck. You tried to declare war on us. We're making a world alliance against you.

-Two days later, and there is now an established monarchy with a queen-

To: Costa Rica
From: United Kingdom of Malyasia and the Arkansas

HM Queen LeAnne-Khadiyja of Malaysia and the Arkansas requests your government enter into an alliance against *Civilizer's nation*

To: UK of Malyasia and the Arkansas
From: Cosat Rica

Ok. 99% of our army is marching to destory *Civilizer's nation*

To: Costa Rica
From: UK of M & the A

Ok. You do that. We'll wathc and support you. But we want half of everything

To: Costa Rica
From *MBarry's nation, Bulg's nation, and P99's nation*

The *nation* formally requests you withdraw from *Civilizer's nation* or face war with our country.

To: Costa Rica
From: UK of M & the A

The United Kingdom of Malaysia and the Arkansas fully condems the actions of Costa Rica and requests a pullout

SECRET
To: Costa Rica
From: UK of M & the A

We still want half o everything by the way

To: The World
From: Glen's Country

The Jesus Loving Christ Worshipping Kingdom of New Spain wants all Christians to be brought back together in a perfect, totally plausible Church.

From: Ausey

Of course! We love that idea. Who care's if my nation is the strongest and most traditionally Catholic nation ever? By the way. The Queen died and her daughter succeeds her. Oh------and we're marrying the daughter of the Crown Prince of Uraguay.

Glen Finney: Stop claiming please. No claims on anything until *date* at which point you will not be able to claim the Uber Swiss Confederation.

Imajin Posting of Country:
Name: Holy Mirco Empire of Andorra, Liechtenstein, Monaco, and San Marino

Leader: HIM Prince, Prince, Prince and President Caroline II ((OOC: Maybe he's thinking 'I should have a female monarch since the coolest person ever Aussey does too'))

Capital: some city

PoD: 800 when everything is feldgling and everything is possible

__________________________________________
heh...this one sux

[Glen]

Well, it depends when the ISOT date is, doesn't it? If it were in the late 20th century/early 21st century I wouldn't have aimed so low for just reuniting Christianity.

The World Ecumen would have been a crowning accomplishment of the Great Nation of Bhutan and Bangledesh!

[reformer]

Ok folks, I'll try incorperating all your stuff. . . but I'm in charge Muhahahaha and believe me, things aren't going to be very nice to your country.

[DuQuense]

well since this is dying due to no one claiming anything, Ill take four little countries.

The American, Russian, British, French, Empires, that leaves enuff let for the few that want something else to claim .

And remember I only do this, to stop the begging for someone to claim these areas

[reformer]

Aussey
Ok, I invade Brunei. Can I annex it now?

MBarry
No, you just invaded.

Aussey
Fine. Be that way.

Aussey
Now?

MBarry
no

Aussey
now?

Glen Finney
Stop playing people! We've only been at this for 5 weeks, we havn't even posted countries yet!

Aussey
Now?

MBarry
No. And Glen, we're playing. Live with it. Your just upset that my Austria ISOTed over Montenegro. Shit happens. Live with it.

Glen Finney
I can't!

Aussey
Can I annex it now?

MBarry
Fine.

Aussey
Yay! This is a great triumph for my muslim Empire.

Otheniel
Aren't you Catholic?

Aussey
We have priest elections like every mealtime.

Glen Finney
Aussey, can't you learn to shape up and play normally?

MBarry
Normall? How can you talk normall! Your Peruvian Cambodia annexed Swaziland!

Glen Finney
I was forced to become unrealistic when you denied me my Montenegran superpower! Oh well. Might as well invade Arkansas.

Aussey
I'm sure Ahura Mazada will protect our duchy.

Mayhem
As a newbie, do I have permission to just kill Aussey?

Aussey
Oh great, I'll never beat Japan! Can I surrender now?

MBarry
No.

Aussey
Now?

The entire Mosaic world
No.

Aussey
Now?

[Glen]

That's a good one! Keep 'em coming. Make sure you work in GP, and get p99 to invade Ethiopia...but not keep it!

[Imajin]

I should get a role... But keep it coming! :D

[Aussey]

i was laughing and my mom gave me a weird look as she walked by :eek:

[Imajin]

Imajin Posting of Country:
Name: Holy Mirco Empire of Andorra, Liechtenstein, Monaco, and San Marino

Leader: HIM Prince, Prince, Prince and President Caroline II ((OOC: Maybe he's thinking 'I should have a female monarch since the coolest person ever Aussey does too'))

Capital: some city

PoD: 800 when everything is feldgling and everything is possible

Other than the OOC part ( :p ), I have to say this looks like a typical Imajin nation- Dark Ages POD (Hey! I don't always have Dark Ages PODs! I've had PODs as late as the Spanish-American War!), random mention of Andorra, Monarchy...

[Aussey]

heh...ok. the OOC part was my shock for your ME6....but you killed her off! so i did too...

[Condottiero]

I claim the Republic of Hispanic Afganistan.

Pre-ISOT territory: Maryland, New Jersey and Florida.
Post-ISOT territory: South Morocco and Hungary.

Can I include in my navy some submarine galleys?
I could drop the knights riding steam powered robot horses, although they would make a nice view escorting Leonardo da Vinci's giant sausage launcher.

By the way when do we start?

[reformer]

Nice One. . . Oh come on. . . you can ISOT Maryland if your really want to. We know how many Morrocans live there after all.

And, in case you were woundering, this isn't actually a game to be played out, just to spoof on the people and events being played, unless your folks actually want a game.

[reformer]

It is the fourth week of ME: 27. The game is just picking up. Every character is looking forward to how it will evolve. . .

Othniel Oh my god. . . Oh my God! THis is like so like exciting.

reformer dude, your playing the Bronx. How much action do you think you'll get?

Othniel Hey, I like playing small nations. Playing the Vatican is very satisfiying.

MBarry BS. We're all still recovering from the great imperial empire of London. God I hated ME 16.1

Othneil London Texas! How many bloody times do I have to say it was Texas?

Aussey Hey! Unfair!

MBarrt What?

AusseyI'm the one you make fun of. Me! I'm the annoying player!

General Paul I'm board. I'm annexing Norway.

Ward You can't.

General Paul Why?

Ward Because your Swaziland.

Othneil Hey, I wanted to play Swaziland!

SoyuzWhy? I mean, we offered to give you the Federal Unified Industrial offices of China, Japan, Mongolia, Belgium, and Lincoln Nebraska. What the hell would you want with Swaziland?
Othniel For the 1,679 time (yes. . . I counted!). . . I like playing SMALL nations.

Glen Finney I'd like to change my country's gun controll policy from allowing hunting in Yellowstone to not allowing hunting in Yellowstone. That's enough. That's the only change I'll make.

Aussye YaY! Policy changes! My favorite! I'm going to change my center-left civil rights focused Democracy into a Baptist theocracy. That's enough. That's the only change I'll make.

Imajin Good God.

Othniel Shut up. I'm the pope! I play the Vatican. I OWN you!

reformer This game is so climactic. I just can't wait for what will happen when the war starts!

Highlander How about a june 1973 ISOT?

AusseySounds good. Sounds good. Lets do it.

MBarry Seriously. Can't we let ONE game last a month.

Entire group stops and thinks for a second. Nah.

[Imajin]

I only got a random appearance... :(
Good though!

[Aussey]

....
(too bad i have to have 10 characters...grrr)

[reformer]

Ok, this is ME land without MBarry to help keep personalities in order.

Glen Finney I'll take the Venice Empire. ..

Imajin Hmm. . . lets see I always wanted to try something Japanese. . . but European. I know. give me Austria. Strike that- SHINTO AUSTRIA!!!

Glen Finney That digs into my borders!!!!! What will I do? I know. I'll take India. And Austrialia. Oh what the hell, Venice is a busy place, give me the Entire Western Hemishpere on top.

Highlander Hmm. . . well I kinda want to play the United Federation of Seattle and Omaha. . . just thoese two cities. . .

Geln Finney NO! Deamon be gone! Thou hath interphered with my claim!!!!! to newbie hell with you!!!!!

MBarry Dude, thoes cities will do nothing to your lands. . .

reformer Um, dude, you don't exsist in this spoof.

MBarry crap

Imajin Will you let me take Shinto Austria if (bursts into tears) I give up :( the southern portion of Austria.

Glen Finney No. I am threatened by your intelligence. For simplicities sake, I'll just take all of Europe.

Operaton Green Does that include Ireland?

Glen Finney Yes

Operation Green Whales?

Glen Finney yes

Operation Green Scotland?

Glen Finney Why do you even BOTHER to ask?

Perd Oh come on

Operation Green Orkney Isles

Glen Yes. Fine. Oh, and reformer's tired of typing my full name, so from henceforward my name is Glen! And to celebrate this achievement, I'm gonna give myself a present :D ! I claim Afrika!!

PerdI think I'll try a Persia this time around.

Glen Finney (shviering with fear) NOOOOOOOOO!!!! How will I survive!!!!!!!! Where have all the good men gone!!!!!!!!!!! I need a hero!!!!!!!! Ok, that's it, Green, I'm gonna have to take the Orkneys.

Operation Green Please don't your majesty! I am but a mere mortal!

Glen Too late for begging Op. Why can't I, just for ONCE play my country intact? Can't we all just keep what he claimed? Live in one happy ME community? (Singing) Dream a Dream of a time tommarrow when we finally learn to love our fellow man. . . Dare to hope for a peaceful begining. . . . where we learn to walk toghether hand in hand. . . (stops singing and has a distant happy far off look on his face, then, still smiling, looks at Operation Green)You too are destined for newbie hell Orkeny stealing jerk

Othniel Othewise known as Lime.

reformer I know. . .what's up with that?

Othniel I think it was from some pun we thought was funny back then.

reformer We were such dorks. . .

Ok, sorry Glen, this spoof is kinda harsh to you. But if you read back, I've been very harsh to Aussey in the past, and GP, just your turn today. This is just a work of fiction. All players (with the possible exception of GP) do not behave this brashly. DON'T SUE ME FOR THiS!!!!!!

[Imajin]

Giving up the southern portion of Austria!?!?! An unrealistic portrayal of me! Expect to hear from my lawyers! :mad: :p

[reformer]

There's a reason why I had you burst into tears. . .

[Glen]

OK, this is ME land without MBarry to help keep personalities in order.

MBarry I do that? Wow!

Shoosh, you're not here!

Glen Finney ....Well....after watching....some of your claims....I think I've found....a glaring hole in what we'll need....I'll take the Venice Empire. ..

Imajin Hmm. . . lets see I always wanted to try something Japanese. . . but European. I know. give me Austria. Strike that- SHINTO AUSTRIA!!!

Glen Finney That digs into my borders!!!!! Do you REALLY REALLY TRULY have a good reason for Shinto Austria? Wouldn't Shinto Iberia be much more plausible? I could even give you a few suggestions on how its history should....I mean would....go.

Imajin Please?

Glen Finney Argh....oh, very well....What will I do now? This game absolutely, positively requires a world girdling, ultrapowerful, quasi-utopian force for good. Without Austria there's a big hole in the infrastructure of the Empire.....I know....I'll take India. And Austrialia.....a more agressive Venetian development with a few lucky nautical innovations could do it....and I'll still get my Austrian troops. Hmmm, MY Venice is a busy place, maybe I'll take the Entire Western Hemishpere on top.....er, no, can't figure out quite the history that would give me THAT much....maybe just all the major port cities on the Atlantic and the Caribbean, that sounds much more like a Venetian move....hmmm, maybe Venezuela as well...don't want the empire to collapse before the ISOT due to lack of oil....

Highlander Hmm. . . well I kinda want to play the United Federation of Seattle and Omaha. . . just thoese two cities. . .

Glen Finney Sigh! Does no one pay attention to me? The Western Hemisphere claim was internal monologue, and I just took the important Atlantic Coast and Caribbean ports. Omaha is free, and so is Seattle...though maybe I ought to consider taking California....no, but I might, I JUST MIGHT, if there is more claims overlaying vital parts of the Empire. I MUST STAY STRONG, FOR THE SAKE OF THE GAME!!!

MBarry Dude, those port cities will do nothing for your lands. . .

reformer Um, dude, you don't exist in this spoof.

MBarry crap

Imajin Will you let me take Shinto Austria if (bursts into tears) I give up :( the southern portion of Austria.

Glen Finney No. I am threatened by your intelligence.....Okay, reformer, here I am stepping OOC. 'Threatened by your intelligence'? That doesn't even make any sense, nor is it even parody of anything I've ever said or would say. Mocking is one thing, but how about keeping the characters at least recognizable.

reformer Hey, it's just a Spoof, man, take it easy. When I rip on you, its only out of love.

Glen Finney Well, I understand that, but I am still using my self appointed veto power on this line and replacing it with a much more germane, though still mocking, one.

Glen Finney No, don't give up little friend! I was just testing that your heart was pure and you said your prayers to the ME gods at night. I already relented and gave you Austria. AGAIN PEOPLE, DOES NOBODY READ MY POSTS? Maybe just to be safe, I should just take the rest of Europe. I mean really, people, its just a peninsula. Why must it always be carved up? How Parallelist of us (ooh, burn!). Let's carve up Russia and America instead! KILL THE OTL SUPERPOWERS KILL THE OTL SUPERPOWERS....its cool, and leaves me with less competition....:rolleyes:

Operaton Green Does that include Ireland?

Glen Finney Yes

Operation Green Whales?

Glen Finney yes, all the whales in the European seas are mine, or did you mean Wales, derived from the Anglo-Saxon Wealas, or foreigner, as opposed to the true, Gaelic name of Cymry, or companions (he said pedantically).

Operation Green No, I meant the Whales in the sea....some of the oldtimers told me a cool idea for an ASB Atlantis, and I though I could use em for domestic animals.

Glen Finney (small voice) oh....

Operation Green Scotland?

Glen Finney Why do you even BOTHER to ask? When I say ALL THE REST OF EUROPE, That's exactly what is meant....

Perd Oh come on (just nobody take the Philippines....sweet sweet Philippines....and stay away from Formosa....don't even THINK Taiwan)

Operation Green Orkney Isles

Glen Finney Yes. Fine. Take them all. Just give me a 100 page analysis of the historical and economic forces that would produce a country that would include all those areas....nah, that is too much work....I'll think up a premise for you....hmm, maybe something to do with England.....

Glen Oh, and reformer's tired of typing my full name (lazy bastid...hmmm, when I say bastid, am I trying to sound like LOBO or WOLVERINE...or just avoid using profanity on a child available website....or maybe just don't want the Google Spiders to discover me using profanity....darn, I should have picked a different screen name, something witty like Doctor What....darn, that was taken....I've lost track of what I was even saying in here....better leave the parentheses....), so from henceforward my name is Glen! Well, it was always Glen, but you can now drop that ending thingee....And to celebrate this achievement, I'm gonna give myself a present :D ! I claim Afrika!!

reformer But I wanted to take Djibuti! It is the only way to save my poor Attaturk Ottoman Empire from Imajin and MBarry....

MBarry Dude, I don't exist, remember?

reformer Damn! Okay, from Aussey, and GP, and Bulg, and Perd, and...

Glen Fine, just take it then. Though it would have been useful to preserve my absolute dominance of the Red Sea route between Venice and Venetian India.

reformer No, I don't want to take it now, just leave it open for NPC conflicts. An open Djibuti will guarantee the game will be a good one, and loads of intrigue and war.

Glen Ummm, how does Djibuti benefit Ottoman? I mean, it is clear as sunshine that it would be best for the Venetians....though I was thinking of leaving it empty till I lost so much....after all, its easy to see how the Venetians would end up with all of Afrika, but not Djibuti....though I could probably figure out a slight divergence....yes, maybe the Venetian explorers look right when they pass through the Strait to exit the Red Sea....that might just work....its actually more plausible than them only looking left, now that I think about it....

reformerWHAAAA:( :( :( I thought it was going to be NPC...wait a minute, I'm stepping OOC now. You have me actually crying Whaaa? Okay, I did go on a bit, and there were sad faces involved a few times, but really....and stop typing those periods when I'M speaking, that's your thing. Oh, and now you have me capitalizing words to shout out? Stay in character, please.

Glen Finney Ooops, you're right. Just forget that last.....

reformerNo! I thought you said it would be NPC now! Can no moderator save our ME from the ravages of the ever expanding Venetian Empire.

MBarry Dude, I'd only take half of Djibuti.

reformer and Glen Finney You don't exist!

MBarry Damned, non-existence is hard. Dick Cheney never told me it would be this hard. I think I need to go shoot something....just not with Cheney....Damned, Glen, now you've got me doing your period thingee, and I DON'T EVEN EXIST....there it is again! And now I'm emphasizing in capitals!

Glen Finney (sheepish voice) sorry, force of habit....go back to not existing now....

PerdI think I'll try a Persia this time around.

Glen Finney (shviering with fear) NOOOOOOOOO!!!! How will I survive!!!!!!!! Where have all the good men gone!!!!!!!!!!! I need a hero!!!!!!!!

Oh, hang on a tick, that's reformer's lines....where are mine....oh, here they are.....

(shivering with fear FOR THE GAME) NOOOOOOO!!!! How will I be able to properly dominate the four corners of the Earth without Persia! I know you'll all be gunning for me once the game starts (paranoid glances at everyone)! Even I'm gunning for me with my Evil Tibet-Bhutan (which of course encompasses all of Central Asia). I only took it because I was worried that we didn't have enough strong bad guys for a good game....and then it kinda grew as a cool idea in my mind....now I can't let it go....besides, no one ever takes Tibet-Bhutan in the game...it would just be an NPC area, and that will just KILL the game....I've lost the thread of this rant again...oh yeah....Ok, that's it, Green, I'm gonna have to take the Orkneys.

Operation Green Please don't your majesty! I am but a mere mortal!

Glen Too late for begging Op.

Well, actually its never too late for begging, just so long as we understand the great sacrifice I am making in giving all of you so much!

Why can't I, just for ONCE play my country (scratch that, I usually get my countries intact)...why can't we for ONCE have an intact Venetian Empire? Can't we all just keep what he...I mean we...claimed? Live in one happy ME community? (Singing) Dream a Dream of a time tommarrow when we finally learn to love our fellow man. . . Dare to hope for a peaceful begining. . . . where we learn to walk toghether hand in hand. . . (stops singing and has a distant happy far off look on his face, then, still smiling, looks at Operation Green)You too are destined for newbie hell Orkeny stealing newbie....oh wait, I editted out the last newbie in hell comment....I like newbies....and he called me 'your majesty'....always been a sucker for flattery. Never mind, you can have it.

backstab Why does he ramble so much?

MBarry No one knows. For someone so busy, he sure does talk a lot.

reformer and Glen Finney YOU DON'T EXIST!!!!

Glen Finney Was it okay that I capitalized our joint yell?

reformer (shrugs) Seems appropriate.

Othniel Othewise known as Lime.

reformer What's otherwise known as Lime? I know. . .OperationGreen....it was just so long ago that he had a line after Glen's rambling and comments...what's up with that? And Glen, stop with the periods!

Glen Finney You had one of them in the line you typed, so I thought it would be okay.....

Othniel Excuse me, let's get back on subject. I think it was from some pun we thought was funny back then. And you know, Glen, you've got a fairly large empire that could afford some more holes.

Glen Finney The idea was to have a large empire....not swiss cheese...

reformer We were such dorks. . .wait a minute, he's doing it again. This line is so far from Oth's comment, its not even clear what I'm referring to. And you thought you could write a better spoof than me?

Glen Finney Usually I keep the rambles under control, but every once in a while....(shudders).

reformer Ok, sorry Glen, this spoof is kinda harsh to you. But if you read back, I've been very harsh to Aussey in the past, and GP, just your turn today. This is just a work of fiction.

It has nothing to do with the fact that we've been disputing over Ethiopia in the real game for the past twenty-four hours that I just so happened to resurrect this thread after two months of inactivity and put you as the star. All players (with the possible exception of GP) do not behave this brashly. DON'T SUE ME FOR THiS!!!!!!

Now, for my next parody, Imajin and his ludicrously large Shinto Austria against the tiny, defenseless Attaturk Ottoman Empire....STOP THAT!

Glen Finney Oh, I know its all in good fun. Just like this parody of your parody. Next, my parody of my parody of your parody.

MBarry Hmph, for a story about my nonexistence, I didn't seem to be mentioned much except when I commented.

reformer and Glen Finney YOU DON'T EXIST!!!!

Glen to reformer Ah, scraw it (past perfect participle of screw), let's just go get a beer.

reformer to Glen Sounds good to me....but I am getting an NPC Ethiopia in the real game, right?

Glen Yeah. Don't get me started........................................... .......

[Imajin]

Glen Finney This ME is going really well, guys! Let's keep this one going.

radical_neuetral lets play me93 cthulu era... go!

MBarry Huh? *closes thread*

radical_neuetral why did you close my thread? me93, 1999, i claim bismarckian pirate thailand with japan

Glen Finney Huh? *closes thread*

radical_neuetral sorry about my other threads. me93, thirty years war, i claim prussia with all of europe and the caribbean, ruled by bismarck in the 1600s

Ian the Admin Huh? *closes thread* Wait a second, since when did I visit this forum?

Aussey Alright, let's start another ME, 1800, I claim the Kingdom of Westphalia ruled by the Queen of Orange-Deguise.

Othniel That doesn't make sense! Why would Westphalia be ruled by the House of Orange? What are the Deguises doing there? And I claim the French Republic... preserved.

Aussey Fine, fine, I'll replace it with the Hindu Netherlands.

Imajin Hm, I claim the Tyran Empire, controlling all of the eastern mediterranean, including Thrace if I can.

reformer I'd like to claim the Despotate of Athens, with all of Greece and Turkey.

Glen Finney Imajin: Sounds interesting, how is the government going to be ran?

Imajin By the House of Hapsburg, of course.

Othniel But what of butterflies?

Imajin Alright, fine, Hapsburg-Andorra.

General_Paul I'd like to claim all of Australia except for the south east, as the Aboriginie Empire, with 1 billion people.

MBarry Could you really fit one billion people into the deserts of Australia?

General_Paul Alright, fine, 500 million. Is that better? I cut it in half!

Glen Finney Here's the latest map... I think I'll play New Granada this time around...

reformer What? I specifically mentioned I wanted Greece and Turkey! Why did you give Thrace and the south coast to Imajin!

Othniel His post came first.

Glen Finney Alright, fine, reformer (posts different map)

Imajin But now I don't have a port! Well, other than Tyre and the rest of the Phoenician cities.

Highlander Can I claim Central America? I wanted to make it communist, or maybe fascist...

Glen Finney But it's integral to New Granada! I don't think I'll play it if I lose any land.

Highlander Alright, I'll play the United States... Can anyone think of a POD that would make the United States communist after 1990?

Othniel I thought this was the 1800 ME.

Aussey Come on, we switched to 2100 AD hours ago...

Glen Finney Alright, let's start posting history.

Imajin History of Tyre: The Phoenicians defeated whoever conquered them (sorry, too lazy to look up) and then ruled the Mediterranean... until, that is, the Empire that rose out of Latium conquered most of Europe, and then some other stuff happened that made Tyre powerful again. America was discovered in 1493 (see! not convergent at all!) and there were two world wars in the 1900. And that's how Tyre came to be.

Aussey History of Netherlands: The Queen of Lorraine decided to move her capital to Amsterdam and convert to Hinduism, so that she would stay out of religious wars. This was followed by a long family tree, which would be more detailed if Imajin wasn't so lazy. Then the Dutch colonized everything, but under the benevolent rule of the Queen everyone was happy.
Now here are all the flags for my country, including national, governmental, ensigns, personal flags, provinical flags, municipal flags, and flags from ATL variants.

MBarry This is the military thread. (detailed list)

General_Paul Is this alright? (incredibly long list)

MBarry I thought you were the Aboriginies? How did you get German equipment? And those stats means that all 500 million people would be in the army!

General_Paul But I'm threatened on all sides!

Glen Finney But no one claimed the rest of Australia... I suppose I will for New Granada if you don't mind.

Imajin Alright, I read up on these militaries... I think I'll have chariots... I think that's the time period, right?

Bulgaroktonos Hey, who wants to play a ME centered on the first crusade?

Aussey Oh! I claim the Kingdom of Jerusalem...

[Glen]

Imajin, I really liked your last parody. Captured a lot of our silliness!

One quibble...when I play New Granada, I whine about losing ANY territory in the ISOT, but don't try to pick up extra during the building phase....I do that after ISOT....Now the British Empire....:rolleyes:

[Highlander]

Interesting . . . see I got a few guest appearences.

[Chingo360]

hey what do i have to do to get a guest appearance!?:)

[Imajin]

hey what do i have to do to get a guest appearance!?:)
I was considering throwing you in pleading for us to join Feudal Lands: Antarctica, but decided against it :p

[chunkeymonkey13q]

Be an obnoxious part of the Mosaic Earth game.

[reformer]

Glen, that was just hilarious. thank you so much for doing that. Imajin, the sad thing is I could actually see one of our planning threads going like that.

[Matt]

I suppose I'm some sort of glue that holds it together aren't I? ;)

[Bulgaroktonos]

Aussey History of Netherlands: The Queen of Lorraine decided to move her capital to Amsterdam and convert to Hinduism, so that she would stay out of religious wars. This was followed by a long family tree, which would be more detailed if Imajin wasn't so lazy. Then the Dutch colonized everything, but under the benevolent rule of the Queen everyone was happy.
Now here are all the flags for my country, including national, governmental, ensigns, personal flags, provinical flags, municipal flags, and flags from ATL variants.

I'm crying I laughed so hard at that.

That was an uncannily accurate portrayal of our planning sessions....

[Glen]

I'm crying I laughed so hard at that.

That was an uncannily accurate portrayal of our planning sessions....

Frighteningly little exageration, really....:eek:

[reformer]

Reformer I'm so glad we could meet this way again. . .

Aussey's Wife You've made the loss so much better

Reformer I know, Aussey's death was a celebra. . . er, um, tradegedy.

Aussey's Wife At least it brought us toghether. (they start kissing passionately)

Reformer I know, its such a relief

Aussey's Wife But we'eve been fooling around for years. . .

Reformer Yah, but it is easier now that Aussey'a not around.

Aussey (outside of the house) Its me. . . I'm back from the dead. . .and I'm talking to myself, but what the hell, I do that anyway. Life must be good, I can't wait to see how that game turned out. . . did my character become empress of the planet. . . oh please God please. .. . I just love my empresses. . . anyway, I am so ready for the next ME. Of course I have no clue what country I'm playing, so I designed the flags for every single possible country just in case. I'm particularly proud of the United Nations of Omaha. And now I'm back with my friends!!!!!!!!!! (opens the door)

Reformer Oh (Beep)

Othniel Oh my God, its like a soap opera or something (credits roll

A big hourglass appears on screen
Imajin (voice over) As sands through the hourglass, so ar the days of our lives. . .

reformer wait a sec, this is MOSAIC Earth. That intro doesn't work.

Imajin (sighs) Fine, As sands in my hourglass, stuck with sands from your hourglass, stuck toghether in someone elses hourglass full of NPC nations we don't care about, except for OTL TL sands from OTL Hourglasses, except thoes are in the same big hourglass, except reformer who always drops out, these are the days of our live.

[reformer]

Aussey So guys, what have I missed?

Imajin Well, we'eve gone through about five games. . . oh, and we saved Portugual for you. . .

Aussey Oh thanks guys!!!!!!! That means so much, I have 12 flags designed for it, so tell me, is it a monarchy, democracy, Republic, People's Republic, Democratic People's Republic, Anarchy, Muslim, Zoroastrian, Rostofarian, Fuedal, tribal, or .com owned? Which of the 12!!!!!!!

Reformer Forget it, that game ended before any of the nation even realised something was wrong.

Luakel It was fun though. . .

Aussey Who the hell are you?

Luakel Come on, I've been here for awhile.

Perd But your still a newbie. And you only became a main character two months ago.

Aussey Huh?

reformer Well you know how when a character leaves a tv show, he's replaced by a character who has the same personality and job, accept different actor? Well Luakel's the new Aussey!!!

Aussey So I'm no longer comic relief?

reformer No, now your the babe magnet.

Aussey Cool. . . YUS!!!!! I knew I could do it. . .

Fenkmaster He he he, there aren't any girls in AH.com . . . Jokes on you?

Aussey Well at least I still have my wife. . .

Reformer Oh, relax, you don't have to worry about her anymore.

General Paul Oh hey, Aussey!!!!!! Good to see you alive.

Aussey (scared) Please don't hurt me

General Paul Look, Aus, I have so many things I have to appolgise. Like the time I annexed your nation BEFORE the ISOT, or the time that I gave your empress to Venetian pimps, or the time I used your country as a testing ground for my death ray, or the time I made your country go away just by saying so, or the time I took over your world empire with Monnaco just because I'm GP, and I can get away with everything, or the time my one claim interllaped on all four of yours, and I got all mine, because I'm GP, or the time I took away your mod rights just because people are scared of me, or the time I didn't help you kill reformer because I thought he was funny, or the time I didn't tell you about Reformer and your wife. . .ups, forget I said that, or the time I nuked your capital city because you mis-spelled my country. . .
I'm so so so sorry.

Aussey Oh its ok, all water under the bridge. (aside to Soyuz) What the hell is wrong with him? He's never been this nice. . .

Soyuz Oh, he's been in therapy ever since we proved that he was a weakling in Diplomacy.

General Paul Oh my Turkey!!!!!! (bursts into tears)

Aussey Wow, so much time has changed since I was gone in hel. . . er heaven. Say, how has the world changed? Has president Are the Americans still in Iraq? Has the president come to his senses?

reformer Oh, you can relax about that. President Phil Swing is a real whimp.

Aussey Swing? What kinda idiot made a guy named Swing president.

Luakel This real pompous jackass who just won't let me into Iberia!!! the jerk. . .

reformer Thankyou Luak, I love you too.

Aussey So I've been trying to read this XX Century thing. . . what is it exactly?

reformer Ok, here's the deal, actually, one the other hand. . .you know, I'll just end the spoof before we give the entire explanation.

[Agentdark]

Hahahahahah, thats awsome

[Glen]

Since me having an affair with someone else's wife is not only a non-sequiter that has nothing to do with any of my activities, but also personally distasteful to me as I do not condone adultry, I have decided to let reformer have that part instead of me.

Really, what were you thinking?:(

[reformer]

Your just in a possition of power. It could just as easily been one of the other blokes.

[Glen]

Your just in a possition of power. It could just as easily been one of the other blokes.

Well, I didn't think it was very appropriate, especially since it wasn't actually parodying anything we've done on AH.com.

[General_Paul]

lol, outside of the adultery, its damn good reformer!

[Soyuz]

With the "Well it's done" thread currently being the rage for discussing ME shortcomings, I would like to point out another one. It's everyone claiming superpowers or, at least, very well-off nations than OTL. I'm for it. So here I decided to adopt the song "Who's next?", renamed to "What's next? :rolleyes: "

You can listen to the tune and view original lyrics here (http://members.aol.com/quentncree/lehrer/whosnext.htm).

First Matt claimed "US!" and that was good,
'Cause we love big powers in our 'hood.
Then DuQuense claimed some land, but that's O.K.,
Eurasia looks good united in that way!
What's next? :rolleyes:

Bulg claimed small, but don't you grieve,
He shouldn't have nukes (or so you belived) ;)
Ward claimed Draka, spread out north high,
The world never saw such good HDI!
What's next? :rolleyes:

Highlander claimed some nation that
Could outproduce the US flat.
Zarth and 'Dark want two each, that's right:
Two with which to fight and two to unite!
What's next? :rolleyes:

Soyuz's gonna claim one too,
Just to invade you-know-who.
So Othniel's getting tense,
Needs one in self defense.
"I love RPing very much,
But a superpower - you just cannot touch!"
What's next? :rolleyes:

Imajin is next to go,
Wait, what's that - super Monaco?!
We better start the ME soon
Before G_P can claim the Moon!
What's next, what's next, what's next?
What's next? :rolleyes:

[Douglas]

Not to ruin the parody, but I have never claimed a superpower...ever. And I'm one of the voices in the desert calling for people to have weaker militaries and weaker countries.

[Soyuz]

Not to ruin the parody, but I have never claimed a superpower...ever. And I'm one of the voices in the desert calling for people to have weaker militaries and weaker countries.

Touche, I don't remember who claimed what and was just looking for a 1 syllable name. I'm not sure if I should put Glen or Ward in that place though.

But even you have to admit that your nations do much better than their OTL counterparts. Indian Madagascar? Indian Australia? That's a weaker country than the Indian state in the south OTL?

[Matt]

Very nice Soyuz... :)